Life's Trials
by Raven Shadowrose
Summary: Sequel to Epiphany, Jeff and Dixie are trying for a baby, what happens when it turns out to be more difficult than they imagined it would be?
1. Chapter One

******Author: Raven Shadowrose**

**Rating: T**

**Pairing: ?/?**

**Summary: Sequel to Epiphany, Jeff and Dixie are trying to have a baby, what happens when it is likely to be more difficult than they first thought?**

**Disclaimer: I do not know or own any of the characters from Casualty, any original characters and the story are my property and I do not give permission for either of them to be used.**

**A/N: This is a direct sequel to Epiphany, please read that first to understand this story :) Reviews are welcome :)**

* * *

**Chapter One.**

Dixie stood outside the ambulance station and waited for Jeff, she was worried, they had been trying for a baby for six months and so far she still wasn't pregnant. 'Princess, are you ready?'

'Yeah, best to get it over and done with.'

'Don't worry Dixie, whatever it is we will face it together.' Jeff put his arm around Dixie and they went into the hospital and up to the ante-natal clinic. Dixie felt like she had failed somehow, no matter how many times Jeff told her that it wasn't her fault she still felt that it was. She held onto Jeff as they approached. 'Hi, we have an appointment today, Mr and Mrs Collier.' The nurse looked on the computer and then smiled at them.

'Okay, you're all booked in, take a seat and someone will be with you shortly.'

'Thank you.' Dixie sat down with Jeff in the waiting area, she looked at the pregnant women in there and wished that she was pregnant now.

Jeff held Dixie's hand as they sat in the waiting area of the clinic, he could see Dixie looking at the pregnant women in there and squeezed her hand. 'If I had told you earlier Jeff, I might have been pregnant by now.'

'Dixie, it isn't your fault, I'm sure that everything will be fine.' Jeff kissed Dixie's head and hugged her, he hated that she was blaming herself for something that she had no control over.

'I hope you're right.'

'I am.' Jeff held Dixie closer in his arms and tried to comfort her the best that he could.

Dixie looked up when the doctor called their names, she was dreading this appointment, what if he told her that she could never have a child? She sat down in one of the chairs and folded her hands in her lap. 'I have looked over your test results from the last time that you were here and I believe I have found the cause of your inability to get pregnant. When we were examining your tests Mrs Collier we found that your fallopian tubes are blocked meaning that you will not be able to get pregnant.' Dixie just stared at the doctor, she didn't know what to say, this was her fault.

Jeff looked at Dixie, she looked as if she was in shock, he held her hands in his and stroked them gently. 'What can we do?'

'The blockages are only small, I have every hope that we can remove them with laparoscopic surgery. I have prepared an information pack for you to read at your leisure, I understand that this is quite a shock and you will need some time to discuss what I have told you. I have taken the liberty of organising a slot for the surgery to take place, if you decide not to go ahead then let us know.'

'Thank you doctor, can we go?'

'Yes, see you soon.' Jeff smiled weakly at the doctor and escorted Dixie from his room, he knew that she was going to be blaming herself for this.

Dixie got into the car, she had given Jeff her key for her locker so he could get her stuff, she didn't want to see anyone or have them fussing around her. She couldn't have a baby, already she was failing as a mother, she couldn't even get past the first stage of getting pregnant. She blinked back the tears that were threatening to spill down her face, she very rarely cried but now looked as if this was going to be one of those rare times. She barely paid attention to anything that Jeff said, the only thing that she could hear was the doctor telling her that couldn't get pregnant. She got out of the car the minute that it stopped and went upstairs, she just wanted for all of this to be a dream.

Jeff looked up the stairs, he wanted to go to Dixie, would she bite his head off if he went up there? He decided that she could tell him to go away and shout at him all she liked but now was not the best time for her to be alone. He knocked on the door. 'Dixie?'

'Go away.' He could hear the tears clouding her voice and pushed open the door. 'Go away Jeffrey.'

'No.' He went over to the bed and wrapped his arms around her.

'Get off me Jeff, this is all my fault.'

'It is not princess, I love you.' Jeff held Dixie as she broke down, it killed him inside to see her like this. He knew that she needed to cry, that she needed to get it all out of her system. Dixie rarely cried but he understood that she needed to cry now, he needed to be the strong one for her during this time. 'I love you princess.' Jeff stroked Dixie's hair and just held her tightly, he loved her dearly and he wasn't going anywhere.

Dixie held onto Jeff, she had been determined to make him go away and let her suffer but the feeling of his arms around her made her crumble. She needed him now, he was the only one that she wanted with her at this time. Her crying faded to nothing and she just lay in Jeff's arms, she was tired and she couldn't fight him any more. 'Jeff?'

'Yes princess.'

'Is this my fault?'

'No, you are not to blame. This is something that could happen to anyone.'

'I wish I believed that.'

'Dixie, look at me, this is not your fault.' She looked at Jeff and tried to smile.

'I must look a mess.'

'Nonsense, you're beautiful Dixie.'

'Liar.'

'I am not.'

'What are we going to do Jeff?'

'For tonight, nothing, I am going to run you a bath and then you're going to bed.'

'But...'

'No, the problem will still be there tomorrow, we can think about it once we've had some sleep.'

'A bath would be nice.'

'Your wish is my command princess.'

'Thank you.' Dixie watched Jeff leave the room, she would not be able to do this without him.

Jeff went into the bathroom and closed the door, only then did he let the tears that he had been holding back fall from his eyes. He had been devastated when he found out that it was Dixie that had something wrong with her, he would rather it have been himself. Now she was going to have to go through surgery and who knew what else. He wiped his eyes, he couldn't fall apart now, Dixie needed him to be strong for her. He splashed his face with water and got rid of all the evidence that he had been crying. Turning to the bath he started running water into it and added Dixie's favourite bubble bath, he just wanted to make her feel better in any way that he could.

Dixie looked up when Jeff came into the bedroom. 'Come on princess.' She slipped her hand into the one that Jeff held out and followed him into the bathroom. The scent of her favourite bubble bath filled her head the minute that she walked in. She took off the robe that was covering her body. 'Jeff?'

'Yes princess.'

'Will you come in with me?'

'Of course I will.' She was glad that they'd had the old bath replaced with one that could fit both of them in it, she needed Jeff now, needed him to be her anchor.

Jeff climbed into the bath and made room for Dixie, asking him to come in with her was her way of asking for help and he was only too pleased to give it to her. He made sure that she was warm enough, he didn't want her getting cold. 'I love you Jeff.'

'I love you too princess.'

'You won't leave me, will you?'

'Leave you? Why would I do that?'

'Because I can't get pregnant.'

'I'm not leaving you, I'll be with you through all of this, you'll never be alone. I promise.' Jeff held Dixie tightly as she snuggled up to him.

'Thank you.'

'No need to thank me princess, we're in this together, always.' Jeff breathed a sigh of relief, Dixie was calmer now, she'd had quite the shock today and he wished that he could take all of her suffering away.

Dixie relaxed, she was glad that Jeff wasn't going to leave her, deep down she had known that he wouldn't but she had to know for sure. The entire world had tipped on its head today and she still wasn't sure how she was going to deal with it. It was still sinking in, she had something wrong with her that was stopping her having a child, she was going to have to have an operation to sort it out and make things work as they should. Were they going to have cut her open, would she have scars? Many questions bounced around her head, this was not her area of expertise, she had no idea what was going to happen to her when she went into the hospital. 'Princess, stop thinking so much.'

'I can't, I'm scared.'

'There's nothing to be scared of, I'll protect you, nothing is going to happen to you.'

'How do you know?'

'Because I won't let anything happen to you.'

'You promise?'

'I do, come on princess, the water is getting cold.' Dixie stepped into the towel that Jeff held out to her and let him dry her off, she really was glad that he was here with her.

Jeff knew that Dixie was afraid, though she worked in a hospital she wasn't the biggest fan of them at all. It was going to be hard for her going in there but he knew that she could do it, Dixie was the strongest person that he'd ever met. He made sure that Dixie dressed in her warmest pyjamas and then sat her down at the kitchen table. He placed some toast in front of her. 'I can't eat Jeff.'

'You have to princess, you're going to need your strength, please Dixie.' Dixie nodded and nibbled at the toast, he was glad that she was eating something even if it was only a little something. He took the plate from her once she had finished and put it in the sink. 'Time for bed Dixie, you're exhausted, you need to rest.'

'I am tired.'

'You should think about taking some time off work.'

'No, I can't, I'll go mad if I'm here all day and thinking about it.'

'Okay.' Jeff wasn't happy about it but he knew that Dixie would be happier working.

Dixie climbed into bed with a sigh, she was worried and it was beginning to give her a headache. Jeff climbed into the bed and she cuddled up to him straight away. 'Hold me.' She relaxed when she felt Jeff's arms wrap around her, she felt safe when he was holding her. 'Don't go away, stay with me.'

'I'm not going anywhere princess.' Her eyes closed when Jeff started stroking her hair, she needed to sleep, she was worn out. Worrying about the appointment and then finding out that she couldn't get pregnant and needed an operation had exhausted her.

'I love you Jeff,' she said sleepily. She was asleep before Jeff could reply.

Jeff watched Dixie as she slept, it was good for her, it had been a terrible day and she was distraught over everything. He would discuss the information that they had been given with her tomorrow. Right now the only thing she needed was rest and comfort, he meant it, he would be with her every step of the way. He would be with her as she went into hospital and as she fell asleep, he would be there when she woke up too, he wasn't going to leave her alone at any time through the process. 'I love you princess.' Jeff kissed Dixie's head and hugged her sleeping form close to him, he was going to take care of her throughout all of this no matter what it took.


	2. Chapter Two

**Author: Raven Shadowrose**

**Rating: T**

**Pairing: ?/?**

**Summary: Sequel to Epiphany, Jeff and Dixie are trying to have a baby, what happens when it is likely to be more difficult than they first thought?**

**Disclaimer: I do not know or own any of the characters from Casualty, any original characters and the story are my property and I do not give permission for either of them to be used.**

**A/N: This is a direct sequel to Epiphany, please read that first to understand this story :) Reviews are welcome :)**

**Thank you to BeethovenRIP, chan. nelson4444 and Carlykinz for your comments and support. Thanks to WrittingWhat'sOnMyMind and Hanflan for following this story  
**

* * *

**Chapter Two.**

Dixie let Jeff make her breakfast and drive on the way to work, she knew that he would worry even more than he already was if she didn't, he would think she was doing too much. He was trying to hide his feelings and be strong for her, she appreciated him supporting her and helping her but she wanted Jeff to talk to her too. It was going to be hard enough getting through this without him keeping things from her. Dixie knew that he wasn't doing it on purpose, Jeff was just very good at looking after people other than himself. Dixie was determined that she would get Jeff talking about his feelings later on. Jeff had volunteered to stay off and look after her while she recovered, she wasn't looking forward to not being able to work for a fortnight but she had no choice. She'd looked quickly at the information and the appointment letter they'd been given yesterday as she was going to have to book some time off work for herself and Jeff.

Tamzin waited for Jeff and Dixie, she was worried, she knew that they had found out the results of their fertility tests yesterday. She hoped that nothing was seriously wrong with either of them, it had been six months and Dixie still wasn't pregnant. She had seen Dixie get more and more frustrated as every month went by and still no baby. Tamzin went over to Jeff and Dixie as they came in, Dixie looked very pale and upset. Tamzin's heart sank, obviously something had gone badly at the appointment yesterday. 'Dixie?' Tamzin said quietly, she was worried, what if it was something that couldn't be sorted out?

'Jeff will tell you.' Dixie carried on walking towards her office and Tamzin just watched her. Dixie was obviously heartbroken, Tamzin could hear it in her voice. 'What happened Jeff?' Tamzin was dreading the answer.

'Dixie needs an operation to unblock her fallopian tubes, it is why she can't get pregnant.'

'Oh, how's she taking it?'

'As I knew that she would, she's blaming herself.'

'I'm sorry, how are you feeling?'

'Worried, I wish it was me that was causing it.'

'I really am sorry, I know how much you both want a baby. If there's anything I can do to help then let me know.'

'Thanks Tamzin.'

'Should she be in work today?'

'I wanted her to stay home but I think she needs to be here, it is how Dixie copes, she needs to work and solve the problems that she can.'

'When is she going in?'

'Next Monday, if she agrees to it that is, Dixie doesn't like being a patient.'

'I know.' Tamzin felt sad for her friends, all they wanted was to be happy and they were having to suffer through all of this. She wanted to help them but she had no idea how.

'How are you coping Jeff?'

'I'm trying to stay strong for Dixie, she's devastated, she needs me now.'

'You need someone too Jeff.'

'I'm okay.' Tamzin knew that he was lying and this was affecting him too.

'If you need someone to talk to then you know where to find me Jeff.'

'Thanks Tamzin.'

'I mean it, don't suffer alone, I am here for you both.' Tamzin hugged Jeff, being there for them was the very least that she could do after they had welcomed her in and taken care of her the way that they had.

Dixie picked up the phone, she was going to have to let the ambulance trust know that she was going in for an operation and would be out of action for two weeks. She had the letter in front of her, she hated hospitals but she would do anything to get pregnant. She picked up the phone and dialled, there was no point in delaying the inevitable. 'Hello, can I speak to Emma Johnson please?'

'What is it regarding?'

'I need to book some time off for an operation.'

'Wait one moment please.' Dixie ran her hands through her hair as she listened to the music on the other end of the phone.

'Hello, Emma speaking.'

'My name is Kathleen Collier from Holby, I need to go into hospital next Monday for an operation, I'll be off work for a fortnight.'

'Do you have someone to cover for you?'

'I'll be putting Tamzin Bayle in charge, my husband, Jeff Collier, will want to take leave too, could you send someone to cover for him?'

'That will not be a problem, thanks for letting us know.'

'You're welcome.'

'Bye Kathleen.'

'Bye Emma.' Dixie hung up the phone, she had taken the first step towards getting all of this sorted out.

Tamzin looked up as she heard her name being called. 'What is it Dixie?'

'Can I have a word?'

'Is there a problem?'

'No, I need to ask you a favour. Jeff, can you come too?'

'Sure.' Tamzin looked at Jeff and followed Dixie into her office, she wondered what Dixie wanted from her. 'What do you need from me Dixie?'

'I am sure that Jeff has told what is wrong with me by now.'

'He has, I'm so sorry Dixie.'

'I know, thank you Tamzin. I need someone to look after the station while I recover from the operation that I need to have. I want that someone to be you.'

'Me? Are you sure?'

'Yes, I am, you are talented and clever. I need someone that I can trust in here.'

'Thank you Dixie.'

'The rotas are done, all you have to do is make sure everyone knows who they are with and send the reports to the ambulance trust.'

'Okay, I'll do it.'

'I'll be on the phone if you need me or if anything goes wrong that you think you can't handle.'

'Thank you Dixie, for trusting me with this.' Tamzin hugged Dixie and smiled, she was happy that Dixie trusted her with something as important as this.

Jeff sat with Dixie in her office, she still looked pale but determined, he was happy to see that she seemed to have got some of her fire back. 'You just made a young girl very happy Dix.'

'Oh Tamzin, she has it in her to be duty officer one day. I trust her to do a good job.'

'What about you? How are you coping?'

'I'm okay.'

'Dixie.'

'All right, I'm not looking forward to being in hospital and having this operation scares me. I am going to do it though because I want a child more than anything.'

'I know you do princess. We'll have a look through the rest of information the doctor gave us when we get home and try to put your mind at rest.'

'Thanks Jeff.'

'You're my princess Dixie and I want you to feel safe and protected and I'll do anything that it takes to make you feel that way.' Jeff suddenly found himself enveloped in a hug. 'Dixie?'

'I just want you to hold me.'

'Anything for you my love.' Jeff just held Dixie in his arms and let her stay in his arms for as long as she needed.

Dixie had tried to concentrate on work but it was hard, she had other things on her mind, she'd managed to get through the day but she was glad to be at home. Jeff placed the information from the doctor on the table and he sat next to her. Dixie picked up the booklet that explained about what was wrong with her. 'Is it making you feel any better Dixie?'

'A little bit, I'm not the only one that has been through this.'

'You're not and it isn't your fault. You didn't make this happen, it is just bad luck.'

'I know.'

'Good.'

'I'm going to find it hard going into hospital though.'

'I know but I will be with you, you have nothing to fear princess.'

'At least I can leave on the same day and come home.'

'Yes, you can.'

'I've organised leave for you, I hope that's okay.'

'It is, I am going to take care of you.'

'Can you deal with that? I am likely to be in pain after it all.'

'I know, I will make it my mission to help you feel better.' Dixie smiled and hugged Jeff, she still felt apprehensive about the operation but she could make it through it all with Jeff by her side.

Tamzin was honoured that Dixie trusted her to run the station while she was in hospital, she was sad that Dixie and Jeff were having so much trouble having a baby. They were good people and suddenly they were having all this trouble and Dixie was having to go in for an operation. Tamzin hoped that it worked and made Dixie able to have kids. Dixie would make a wonderful mother, Tamzin remembered when she came back to Holby without Omar and Dixie had looked after her. She was grateful to Dixie for helping her when she wasn't always confident, Dixie had given her the confidence to go out and treat people. Tamzin wanted to help Dixie but there wasn't much that she could do, she would pray that the operation was successful and that Dixie and Jeff would have the baby they've tried so hard for.

Jeff sat on the sofa and held Dixie, he wanted her near him, he knew that operations could go wrong and that there could be complications. 'Jeff?'

'What is it Dixie, do you need something?'

'I need you to talk to me.'

'I don't understand.'

'Jeff, I know you're worried about all of this and about me.'

'Dixie, I'm fine, please believe me.'

'No, Jeff, you're helping me and I want to help you.' Jeff sighed, Dixie knew everything.

'Okay, I'm worried. I know that all you want is to be a mother and this is a big setback. I wish that I could be the one that is the cause of this, I never wanted it to be you Dixie.'

'I know, it is not your fault either, this is just something that happened.'

'I am going to be with you Dixie, through all of it.'

'We'll face it together.'

'I should be the one being strong for you Dixie.'

'Jeff, please will you drop the caveman act? I know it is in you to want to protect everyone and me especially but we have to work together on this. Together we are unbreakable.' Jeff smiled.

'You're right, nothing will come between us. After all this is over and things are back on track we will get to hold a child of our own. You will get to yell at me while you're in labour and tell me you're never going to let me near you again and I can take care of myself in future.' Dixie laughed.

'I'll hold you to it. You'll be a great dad Jeff.'

'You'll be an amazing mummy Dixie, we'll have a little girl and she'll have your beautiful eyes.'

'I bet we'll have a little boy and he'll have your good heart and protective nature.'

'Do you mean that Dixie?'

'I do, it is what I like best about you.'

'Come here princess.' Jeff hugged Dixie, he felt a lot better having talked with her, she was right, they would face it together.

Dixie was glad that Jeff had talked to her, she knew that the news they would find it hard to have children had affected him too. He had been preoccupied and not his usual self, when Jeff is in a good mood he tells jokes and always smiles. There hadn't been any of his jokes or smiles and it saddened her to think that he was suffering alone with his feelings. She was happy that he had opened up to her. Dixie was still a little afraid but she felt better knowing that Jeff would be with her and they would one day have a child. She would fight for it with everything she had, they would be parents one day.


	3. Chapter Three

**Author: Raven Shadowrose**

**Rating: T**

**Pairing: ?/?**

**Summary: Sequel to Epiphany, Jeff and Dixie are trying to have a baby, what happens when it is likely to be more difficult than they first thought?**

**Disclaimer: I do not know or own any of the characters from Casualty, any original characters and the story are my property and I do not give permission for either of them to be used.**

**A/N: This is a direct sequel to Epiphany, please read that first to understand this story :) Reviews are welcome :)**

******Thank you to BeethovenRIP, chan. nelson4444 and Carlykinz for your comments, I am glad that you are enjoying this story :)**  


* * *

**Chapter Three.**

Tamzin sighed as she sat down on her sofa at home after her shift, from tomorrow she was in charge of everything and she hoped that she would make Dixie proud of her. She was more worried about Dixie going in for her operation and the chance that something could wrong than she was about her sudden promotion. Jeff had reassured her that the doctor was hopeful that he could get rid of the blockages that were causing Dixie's infertility. Tamzin had never met a couple that deserved to have a baby more, she had reassured Dixie that everything would be fine at the station while she was recovering and there would be nothing to worry about. Tamzin wished she felt as confident as she had made Dixie believe that she was, she just hoped that Dixie wouldn't come back to half the ambulances missing and the station falling down. Dixie was going to provide her with notes about everything that she needed to remember and do while she was in charge and that helped a little bit, with any luck it would be a quiet two weeks. Tamzin knew that there were other people in the station that believed they could do the job better than her and weren't too happy that they had been passed over. Tamzin had always wondered if she could go for promotion one day, maybe this was Dixie's way of telling her that she could do it. She didn't want to leave Holby though, she had friends here, maybe a full time promotion could wait a little longer.

Jeff was worried about Dixie, her operation was in the morning and she had been awfully quiet all day, Dixie was only ever quiet when she was thinking about something. He had ordered Dixie's favourite takeaway, she wouldn't be able to have anything to eat after this as her stomach needed to be empty in the morning so she could have the anaesthetic. He wished that Dixie would stop working but she was insistent on doing the notes for Tamzin. 'Jeff, will you make sure that Tamzin gets these notes on how to do my job?'

'Of course I will. How are you feeling?'

'Tense, it is so close now.' So that's why she had been doing those notes, Dixie coped with her feelings by focusing on something else, usually work.

'Everything will be all right Dixie.'

'You will stay with me until I fall asleep won't you?'

'Of course I will, I'll hold your hand until you are asleep.'

'And be there when I wake up?'

'Yes princess, nothing will keep me away, I will be there the minute they bring you out of theatre.'

'Jeff, how are you feeling about all of this?'

'Honestly Dixie, I am sorry that it is you that is having to go through this. You do know that I never wanted any of this to happen.'

'I know, neither did I.'

'I don't want to lose you Dixie.' That was what he was really worried about, that something bad would happen, that Dixie wouldn't make it out of theatre. He knew that the chances of the operation going wrong were very small but he was still worried.

'Lose me? Jeff you're not going to lose me.'

'What if something goes wrong?'

'Jeffrey, you are not going to get rid of me that easily. I am going to come through this and I am going to annoy you while I'm recovering. I will have you running around the house fetching and carrying after me.'

'I wouldn't have it any other way.'

'Even when I want chocolate and ice cream and coffee all at the same time?'

'Even then. You are the most important thing in my life Dixie and I will look after you until you are properly better.'

'What did I do to deserve you?'

'You are you Dixie, the most kind and compassionate woman that I have ever met. You look after everyone and now it is time that somebody looked after you.'

'I wish it wasn't this way Jeff, I wish I was pregnant already.'

'I know princess, you will be pregnant because if anyone deserves to be a mother then it is you.'

'You're so sweet Jeff.'

'Only for you princess. I'm going to make you a hot chocolate, it will help you sleep.'

'Thank you.' Jeff smiled and went into the kitchen to get Dixie her cup of hot chocolate.

Dixie thought back over the week, she had let Tamzin shadow her and learn how to do the duty officer's job by her side. She had made notes for Tamzin just in case she forgot anything but Dixie didn't think that she would, Tamzin was a natural at the job. Dixie was pleased that the station would be in good hands while she was recovering. She had been looking for a way to tell Tamzin that she should go for promotion and now she had been given the perfect opening. If everything went well and Tamzin felt comfortable with being in charge then she would give her more chances to be in charge whenever they became available. Jeff would take care of everything at home, she felt lucky to have such a supportive husband. Dixie took the cup that held her hot chocolate from Jeff. 'Thanks love.'

'You're welcome princess.'

'Do you think I should write you some instructions on how to use the washing machine?'

'Cheeky woman.'

'I'm serious, I do not want you flooding the place.'

'I can use the washing machine you cheeky mare.' Dixie laughed and sipped at her drink quietly. Dixie tried to put the operation from her mind, laughing with Jeff had taken her mind off it but the thoughts and her worries about the operation tomorrow were back again.

'Jeff?'

'Yes princess.'

'I love you.'

'I love you too.' Dixie let Jeff draw her into his arms and hold her, she was glad that he was here with her now, he was keeping her calm and relaxed.

Jeff took Dixie's cup from her when she was finished with her chocolate and went into the kitchen. He could sense that Dixie was worrying again and he knew just what to do to help her feel better. Jeff went and sat next to Dixie when he was finished doing the washing up. 'How are you holding up princess?'

'I'm doing all right.'

'Come with me my love.'

'Where are we going?'

'You'll see.' Jeff held Dixie's hand and he took her to their bedroom.

'It's not time for bed yet.'

'I know, I can do something for you to help you relax. Take off your top princess.'

'Why?'

'Because I am going to give you a massage.' Jeff turned around and prepared the bottle of oil that he had bought earlier, he knew that Dixie was a bit shy when it came to undressing in front of him and he thought that it would make it easier for her if he wasn't looking at her when she took her top off. 'Lie down on the bed princess and let me know when you're ready.' Jeff kept looking the other way until Dixie called to him.

Dixie felt Jeff sit on the bed. 'I'm by your right side princess, I'm not going to do anything you don't want me to.'

'I trust you.' Dixie felt warm oil drip onto her back and then Jeff's hands lightly caressing her skin, it felt lovely and calming. 'Where did you learn to do this Jeff?'

'Instinct, I know you Dixie, you hold all of your stress in your shoulders, just relax princess.' Dixie shut her eyes and concentrated on Jeff's hands moving over her shoulders and all of the tension and stress leaving her body. Jeff was being gentle with her, it was amazing how he was making her feel better with just the touch of his hands. 'Jeff?'

'Hush love.' Dixie sighed in happiness and let Jeff continue caressing her skin, he was making her feel like she was the only woman in the world and that he treasured her more than anything.

Jeff felt Dixie relax, the tension that he had been feeling in her muscles had gone. 'Dixie? Are you feeling better?'

'Yes, thank you Jeff.'

'You're welcome my love.'

'I feel a lot better now.'

'Glad to hear it. Put your top back on princess, I don't want you getting cold.'

'Okay.'

'I won't be a moment.' Jeff put the top back on the oil and put in the drawer and made sure that the heating was on, it was important that Dixie was warm, he didn't want her getting sick.

Dixie pulled her top back on and sat on the bed, she felt wonderful, Jeff had worked magic on her tense muscles and she smiled at his thoughtfulness. It didn't change that she was going to have to face the biggest challenge of her life but she felt better about it all. She felt Jeff looking at her. 'You are amazing Dixie, do you know that?'

'Am I?'

'Yes, you're so brave. I'm proud of you princess.'

'Thank you, I am lucky to have you as my husband. Come here.' Dixie wrapped her arms around Jeff and held him, he was her rock and she needed him more than ever at this time. 'Are you warm enough princess?'

'I am, you're holding me, how could I not be?'

'Am I really that warm?'

'Yes, you're my hot water bottle.'

'Are you ready for bed Dixie?'

'Can you just hold me for a while?'

'Of course I can princess.' Dixie felt Jeff's arms wrap around her and hold her close, she felt safe and protected in his arms and like she could face anything.

Despite Dixie's insistence that she was all right and not tired, Jeff could feel her slowly drifting towards sleep. The combination of worrying, a massage and hot chocolate had tired her out, she was trying to fight it but her eyes were closing. 'Goodnight princess, don't worry about tomorrow, everything will be just fine, I promise you.' Jeff gently lay Dixie down on her pillow and just watched her sleep, he was glad that she was sleeping, if she was sleeping then she wasn't worrying about the operation or getting pregnant. He wasn't lying when he said that he was worried about the operation, he hated seeing Dixie in pain. Jeff kissed Dixie on the head and vowed to keep his promise to support through it all, he would be by her side until the day she held their baby in her arms.


	4. Chapter Four

**Author: Raven Shadowrose**

**Rating: T**

**Pairing: ?/?**

**Summary: Sequel to Epiphany, Jeff and Dixie are trying to have a baby, what happens when it is likely to be more difficult than they first thought?**

**Disclaimer: I do not know or own any of the characters from Casualty, any original characters and the story are my property and I do not give permission for either of them to be used.**

**A/N: This is a direct sequel to Epiphany, please read that first to understand this story :) Reviews are welcome :)**

**********Thank you to BeethovenRIP, chan. nelson4444 and Carlykinz for your comments, enjoy this chapter, all of the medical stuff has been researched on the internet, mainly on the NHS choices website. The operation that Dixie goes through is a very real one and is often used to treat women with infertility problems.**  


* * *

**Chapter Four.**

Dixie sat on the bed that she had been given in the hospital, she was waiting for the doctor to come and explain the procedure to her, they had already taken her blood pressure and checked her heart rate. Dixie felt Jeff squeeze her hand as the doctor came in. 'Okay Mrs Collier, we are satisfied that you are healthy and that we can go ahead with your operation. I need to explain the risks to you and make sure that you understand them.'

'Okay, I understand.'

'There is a risk of a blood clot or DVT with this operation, we may have to change to open surgery if we cannot remove the blockage by laparoscopy, your wounds if not cared for may get infected and there is a possibility of you developing a hernia or a urine infection. Do you understand?'

'Yes.'

'If you experience a fever, severe or increasing pain, red skin around your wounds or a swollen abdomen at any time after your operation then come back to hospital immediately.'

'All right.'

'You will experience mild pain in your abdomen and in your shoulder, this is caused by the gas that is used to inflate your stomach, you will find that the pain will subside within two days and can be eased by a warm shower. There will be some bruising where we insert the instruments but this will disappear without treatment. We will use dissolving stitches to close your wounds and they will disappear in seven days.'

'How soon after the operation will I be able to resume normal activities?'

'You will need to rest for two weeks after the operation and have someone with you at all times for the first day until your anaesthetic wears off completely. I would also recommend that you wait to resume sexual relations until the whole fortnight has passed.'

'How will we know if the operation has worked?'

'We will run a test during the operation, dye will be injected into your cervix and we will see if it runs through into your fallopian tubes. We will make sure that we get all of the tissue that is causing the blockage before we close you up again. Your urine may be green for a while after the operation but it is nothing to worry about.'

'Is there anything else I should know about?'

'You may experience some vaginal bleeding for up to a month after the surgery but it is nothing to worry about and you may bleed heavier than normal during your first period which might not appear for up to six weeks after the operation. Eat a light evening meal when you get home and that should relieve any nausea that you are feeling. Your bandage can be removed tomorrow morning and the steri-strips three days later.'

'Is that everything?'

'Yes, we will give you an information pack with everything that I have told you in it. If you still want to go ahead then I will need you to sign this consent form.'

'Okay.' Dixie picked up the pen and signed the form the doctor held out to her.

'Thank you, a nurse will be along shortly to insert your IV.'

'Thank you doctor.' Dixie held Jeff's hand, the time was nearly here and she was getting nervous.

Jeff hugged Dixie after the doctor had gone. 'Everything will be okay princess, they know what they're doing.'

'I know, it is a good job I haven't had anything to eat or I would be sick.'

'You're being very brave my love.'

'I don't feel it.'

'Come here princess.' Jeff sat on the bed with Dixie and kissed her head. 'All of this will be over soon and we'll be on our way to having a little Dixie.'

'Or a little Jeff.'

'Trust me princess, everything will be fine.' The nurse came in and Jeff stroked Dixie's hand as the nurse put in the IV line.

'Okay all done, you have to stay in bed now as soon you will start feeling drowsy and we don't want anything happening to you.'

'All right.' Jeff sat with Dixie and watched as the drugs started to take effect. 'Jeff?' Jeff barely heard Dixie utter his name.

'I'm here princess.' He stroked Dixie's hair and hoped that she knew he was by her side.

Jeff was still sat with Dixie when the doctor came back. 'It's time.'

'Can I stay with her until she is asleep? I promised her that I would.'

'Of course you can.' Jeff followed them to the theatre and held Dixie's hand as they administered the anaesthetic. Dixie's eyes fluttered shut and he kissed her head. 'I love you princess, see you soon.'

'Come back in ninety minutes, we should be finished by then.'

'Please look after her.'

'We will.' Jeff nodded at the doctor and left the theatre, he hoped that everything went well.

Tamzin looked at the clock on the wall of Dixie's office, Dixie would be in theatre now, she hoped that everything went well. She looked up when the knock came on the door. 'Jeff, you don't have to knock, come in.'

'Thanks Tamzin, Dixie is in theatre now.'

'How are you holding up?'

'I'm worried, I just don't want anything to go wrong.'

'It won't, she's strong, we both know it.'

'I know, at least Dixie is asleep through it, staying awake is much harder.'

'That it is. I'll come and see her once she's out of theatre.'

'Thank you.' Tamzin hugged Jeff, she could see that he was suffering and worrying about Dixie. 'How are you coping Tamzin?'

'I'm okay, Dixie's notes are very precise and they're helping. I just wish I had a bit more support from the others in this station.'

'What's wrong?'

'I know that some people don't want me doing this job.'

'Ignore them, nearly everyone in this station supports you, the fact that Dixie has chosen you says everything. If anyone says anything you send them to me.'

'Thanks Jeff, it means a lot to me that you believe I can do this.'

'I do believe in you Tamzin and so does Dixie.'

'I know, thank you.'

'I'm going to go back and wait for Dixie, I'll let you know when she's out and starting to wake up.'

'Make sure you do.' Tamzin smiled, Jeff and Dixie believed in her, that meant more to her than anything. Suddenly the whispering and comments from the mean few didn't matter any more.

Jeff went and sat by Dixie's bed, she wasn't back yet, she would still be in theatre for a little while longer, he wished that she was out of there already. He had promised Dixie that he would be there for her when she came out of theatre and he was going to keep that promise. He hated having nothing to do, being idle lead to thinking and now he was thinking about whether or not they could get rid of the blockages or if something went wrong in there. He was still thinking when the nurses brought Dixie back, she was still sleeping and the doctor came over to Jeff. 'How did it go doctor? Is everything okay?'

'Why don't you come with me while the nurses make Mrs Collier comfortable.' Jeff was worried but he followed the doctor down the corridor. 'What happened?'

'The operation went well, we have managed to remove all of the tissue that was causing your wife's infertility, the dye test revealed that her fallopian tubes are functioning normally.' Jeff just stared at the doctor and breathed a sigh of relief.

'Thank you for everything that you've done for us.'

'It is my pleasure.' Jeff took the pack that the doctor handed to him.'This contains all of the information you will need to deal with Mrs Collier's recovery, if you have any problems don't hesitate to bring her back in.'

'I will. How long it will be before she wakes up?'

'An hour or two.'

'Can I sit with her?'

'Of course you can.'

'Thank you again.' Jeff went back to Dixie's bedside, the nurses had left and he went over to her and kissed her on the head. 'You did it princess, everything is going to be all right.' Jeff took Dixie's hand in his own and held it, he couldn't wait to tell her when she woke up.

Tamzin left to go and see Jeff and Dixie as soon as her work allowed, she pulled back the curtain to find Jeff sat with a still sleeping Dixie. 'Hi, how did it go?'

'Everything is fine, the operation was a success.'

'I'm so glad to hear it, is she waking up yet?'

'I think so, she keeps moving from time to time.' Tamzin took the other seat beside Jeff.

'I think this is the only time that I've ever seen Dixie really quiet.'

'You're right there Tamzin, she talks in her sleep from time to time though.' Tamzin smiled, she could very well imagine Dixie talking in her sleep and waking Jeff up. She watched Jeff as he held Dixie's hand and stroked it gently, she had never seen a couple more in love and she hoped that the bad times were over for them now.

Jeff watched Dixie intently and she moved more frequently as the time passed. 'Jeff?'

'I'm here princess, it's all right.' Jeff stroked Dixie's hair and she settled down, he was pleased that his presence made her feel better. 'Tamzin, will you find a nurse please?'

'Sure, I'll be back in a minute.' Jeff watched Dixie closely and her eyes opened.

'Hello princess, how are you feeling?'

'Tired and sore, everything hurts.'

'Tamzin has gone for a nurse, we'll sort out the pain for you.' Dixie closed her eyes and then slowly opened them again as Tamzin came back with the nurse. 'How are you feeling Mrs Collier?'

'I'm sore.'

'I'll just get you some pain relief.' Jeff looked on as the nurse gave Dixie some pain relief through her IV. 'There is a prescription for the painkillers you will need at the pharmacy, you'll need to pick it up before you leave.'

'Thank you.'

'I'll get it for you,' Tamzin said and left Jeff alone with Dixie.

Dixie relaxed, the pain she felt in her body was going and she was feeling more awake now. 'Jeff?'

'Yes princess.'

'How long have I been asleep?'

'About four hours.'

'Am I okay?'

'What do you mean princess?'

'Can I have a baby now?' She was worried, what if all of it was for nothing, what if she couldn't have a baby?

'Yes princess, there is nothing stopping us now.' Dixie stared at Jeff, the operation had worked, it had been a success. Dixie's eyes filled with tears, she was going to be a mum. 'Dixie, what's wrong?'

'Nothing, I'm happy.'

'Good, nothing is stopping us now, we're going to be parents.'

'I love you Jeff.'

'I love you too Dixie.' Dixie held onto Jeff's hand, she hoped that she could go home soon.

Tamzin came back to find Dixie sat up in the bed, she looked tired but happy, clearly Jeff had told her the news. 'Hi Dixie.'

'Tamzin, how are you getting on?'

'Everything is fine, don't worry, you just focus on getting better.'

'Are you sure?'

'Yes, very sure. I'll come and see you when you're at home.' Tamzin hugged Jeff and handed him the painkillers, she went to leave and Dixie called out to her.

'Hey, where's my hug?' Tamzin smiled, Dixie was slowly getting back to her old self, Tamzin went over to her and carefully hugged her.

'I'm so pleased for you Dixie.'

'Thank you sweetheart.'

'You're welcome.' Tamzin looked at Dixie and Jeff one last time and left them alone.

Jeff helped Dixie to get dressed after the doctor had cleared her to leave the hospital. 'Does it hurt a lot princess?'

'A bit, but it is worth it.'

'I am going to help you get better.' Jeff kissed Dixie's head and picked up the bag that held her things.

'You're a good man Jeff, thank for staying with me until I was asleep, I knew that you were there.'

'You knew?'

'I could feel you holding my hand, it meant a lot to me.'

'I will always be with you when you need me princess. Come on, let's get you home so you can rest.'

'Okay, I still feel tired.'

'You will do, the anaesthetic hasn't worn off yet.'

'I know, I feel it.'

'I'll make you a little something to eat while you put your feet up.' Jeff helped Dixie into the car and helped her put her seatbelt on. 'I love you princess, you do know that right?'

'I do, I love you too Jeff.' Jeff smiled at Dixie and started the car, he just knew that everything was going to be all right now.


	5. Chapter Five

**Author: Raven Shadowrose**

**Rating: T**

**Pairing: ?/?**

**Summary: Sequel to Epiphany, Jeff and Dixie are trying to have a baby, what happens when it is likely to be more difficult than they first thought?**

**Disclaimer: I do not know or own any of the characters from Casualty, any original characters and the story are my property and I do not give permission for either of them to be used.**

**A/N: This is a direct sequel to Epiphany, please read that first to understand this story :) Reviews are welcome :)**

**************Thank you to BeethovenRIP, chan. nelson4444 and Carlykinz for your fabulous comments, Dixie is being a bit stubborn in this chapter :)**  


* * *

**Chapter Five.**

Jeff let Dixie sleep in, she was still feeling the effects of the anaesthetic and she needed to rest, she would wake up when she was ready to. Jeff got himself ready and had some breakfast, he was listening carefully for any signs that Dixie was awake but he heard nothing. He went and sat with Dixie after he had let Little Abs out, once Dixie was awake and he was certain that the effects of the anaesthetic had worn off then he would take him out for a proper walk. Once he'd put Dixie to bed last night he'd read through the information on Dixie's recovery to prepare himself for everything that he needed to do for her. He was aware that Dixie would be stubborn and probably try to do things before she was ready for them, it was in her nature to try and be back to normal as fast as possible. She looked peaceful at the moment, he knew that when she awoke she would be in pain so he'd prepared her painkillers and a glass of water already.

Dixie saw Jeff sat with her as she woke up. 'Morning princess.'

'What time is it?'

'Ten. How are you feeling?'

'A bit groggy still.' Dixie tried to sit up and her eyes screwed up in pain. 'They weren't lying when they said I would hurt after the operation.'

''I have your painkillers, they'll help you. Come here princess, I'll help you.' Dixie let Jeff help her sit up, she wasn't going to make a habit of it but right now she needed his help to move. She swallowed the painkillers and sipped at the water.

'Thanks Jeff, I think I might need you to help me do some things for the next few days.'

'Like what?'

'Sitting up hurt enough, I think bending down and getting dressed might cause me some problems.'

'Okay, I can help you with that, it is why I am here after all.'

'I know I don't usually like asking for help but I need you this time.'

'I tell you what I'm going to do, I'm going to make you some breakfast and bring it to you. What do you want?'

'Just some tea and toast, that's all I can handle right now, my throat is a bit sore, probably from the tube they put down my throat during the operation.'

'Tea and toast it is princess.' Dixie hugged Jeff and leaned back against the pillows, she hated asking for help but she didn't see that she had much choice in the matter.

Jeff put Dixie's breakfast on and set the plate and cup on a tray to take it up to her. He knew that it had taken a lot for her to ask him for help and it was more than likely because she was feeling quite a bit of pain at the moment. The booklet said that she would feel pain from the operation for about four days, he had hoped that the painkillers would take the edge off her pain. Jeff poured the tea and buttered Dixie's toast just the way she liked it. He took it up to her and placed the tray on the bed. 'There you go princess.'

'Thanks.' Jeff watched Dixie eat, she seemed to have a good appetite and he was pleased to see that some of her colour had come back since she'd had some sleep.

Dixie put down the cup and put it back on the tray. 'I feel a bit better now, I want to get dressed.'

'Are you sure? I don't want you to put yourself through more pain than you have to.'

'Please Jeff, I don't want to stay in bed all day.'

'Okay, but at the first sign of pain or tiredness I'm bringing you straight back up here.'

'Deal.'

'What do you want to wear then princess?'

'Something comfortable, I think I have some tracksuit bottoms in there somewhere.' Dixie watched Jeff get her clothing out and he came over to her. 'Come on then princess.' Dixie leaned on Jeff and slowly stood up, she felt a bit of pain but nothing like it was without the painkillers. She was glad that he was there, she wouldn't have been able to get dressed by herself.

'Thank you Jeff, will you stay with me while I clean my teeth and so on, I may need your help again.'

'Of course I will princess.' Dixie smiled, Jeff was being so courteous towards her, needing him to help her do nearly everything wasn't what she had planned but she was glad that he was there.

Jeff stood by as Dixie cleaned her teeth and washed her face, he had to help her with washing her face and putting her moisturiser on as she couldn't quite lift her arms properly just yet due to the left over gas from the operation. 'Are you ready to go downstairs?'

'Yes please, we may have to take it slowly though.'

'No problem.' Jeff held Dixie close as they walked down the stairs, he held her steady and made sure that she wouldn't fall. He put all the cushions on the biggest sofa and helped Dixie to sit down in them. 'I'll just get you a blanket, I don't want you getting cold.'

'Thanks love.' Jeff placed the blanket over Dixie's legs, he just wanted her to be comfortable.

'Is there anything else you need?'

'My shoulders hurt.'

'The booklet they gave me said that they would, they also said massaging them would help.' Jeff sat behind Dixie and lightly massaged her shoulders. 'Is it helping?'

'A little bit, it feels nice.'

'Good, do you feel okay Dixie?'

'I'm okay, I'll tell you if I'm tired.'

'All right princess.'

'Could you get me some water?'

'No problem.' Jeff went into the kitchen and got Dixie her water, he handed it to her and then kissed her head. 'Do you need anything else?'

'I want to see Little Abs.'

'Okay love, Little Abs.' Little Abs came running in the room and sat on the floor by Dixie.

'Hello mate, I am so glad to see you.' Jeff smiled as Dixie stroked Little Abs, she was looking and sounding more like herself, even if she did sound a little croaky.

Tamzin knocked on Jeff and Dixie's door, she'd waited until she was sure that Dixie would be awake and able to see her. 'Hello Tamzin,' Jeff said as he answered the door.

'Is Dixie awake, I'd like to see her.'

'She is, come in.'

'How is she?'

'Sore, I've given her the painkillers and she seems to be in less pain now.'

'Good.'

'Dix, Tamzin is here to see you.' Tamzin smiled as she went into the room, Dixie looked a bit on the pale side but she was sat up and that was a good thing.

'Hi Tamzin, are those for me?'

'Hi Dixie, they are, we all put some money together to get you some flowers and chocolate, there's a card also.' Tamzin gave the flowers to Jeff so he could put them in water. 'Everyone has signed it.'

'Thanks Tamzin, the flowers are lovely.' Tamzin smiled when Dixie read through the card. 'It is nice to know everyone is thinking of me.'

'Of course we are, we all love you.' Tamzin looked up to see Jeff come in.

'I need to take Little Abs for a walk, will you be all right Dixie?'

'I'll be fine.'

'Are you sure, I can always stay.'

'Really, I'll be fine, Tamzin is here.'

'I'll look after her Jeff.'

'Okay, if you're sure.'

'Positive, she'll be fine with me.' Tamzin smiled, Jeff was just being protective of Dixie.

Dixie waited until she heard the front door close. 'How are things at work?'

'Everything is fine.'

'How are you coping?'

'I'm okay, I'm getting used to it. Should you be asking about work?'

'I am going to go out of my mind sitting here for two weeks.'

'I thought you might say that.'

'I know it is worth it because it will give me what I've always wanted but it is frustrating being in pain and having to get Jeff to do things for me.'

'I'm sure he doesn't mind.'

'He doesn't, but on some level I do. I've always been used to looking after myself, Jeff has been a love so far and he's looking after me but I wish I was getting better already.'

'Don't be in too much of a hurry, you need to make sure that you're properly better.'

'I know, it is going to be a while before I can do anything about a baby anyway, I think I'm going to be too sore.'

'Jeff will understand.'

'I know.'

'But you're struggling.'

'A little bit, I have resigned myself to waiting the two weeks until we can start trying again.'

'You will be fine Dixie, everything is okay now.'

'I know, I'm glad, it is a weight off my mind.' Dixie smiled, she really was pleased that she could go ahead and try and get pregnant with nothing stopping her this time.

Jeff had been reluctant to go out with Little Abs but he knew that Tamzin would take care of Dixie while he was out. He knew that Dixie was going to get frustrated being at home for two weeks, he was going to have to remind her that she needed to be careful while she was healing and that was likely to make him an unpopular person. He was going to have to find something to keep Dixie occupied while she was recovering, maybe having Tamzin round on a regular basis would help, she wouldn't feel like she was so out of the loop then. He took Little Abs hone and hung up his lead and went into the lounge to find Dixie and Tamzin talking still. 'I'm back ladies, is everything all right?'

'Everything is fine Jeff, Tamzin was just telling me how she's getting on being in charge.'

'Right, everything is fine.' Jeff sensed that Dixie and Tamzin had been talking about him and they had stopped the minute that he had come in. 'Okay, Dix, I'm going to make us some lunch, is soup all right?'

'Soup will be fine love.' Tamzin stood up.

'I'd better be going, my lunch break is nearly over, I'll come and visit you again when I can.'

'Thanks Tamzin.' Tamzin hugged Dixie and stood up.

'I'll show you out.' Jeff closed the door to the lounge. 'What were you really talking about when I came back?'

'Dixie is struggling a little bit, she wants to have a baby now.'

'I thought she might, I knew that she would find the recovery time hard.'

'Just talk to her.'

'I will.'

'Thanks Tamzin.'

'You're welcome.' Jeff hugged Tamzin and shut the door behind her.

Dixie looked up at Jeff when he came in, he had her flowers with him and placed them on the table so she could look at them. She put her card by them and smiled at Jeff. 'It was nice of them to get me something like this. Want some chocolate Jeff?'

'You'll spoil your lunch.' Dixie chuckled.

'Okay, I'll wait.'

'Tamzin told me you were talking about having a baby.'

'I just want to be a mum Jeff.'

'You will be, but right now you have to get yourself better and then we can try for a baby. I don't want to hurt you Dixie.'

'I know, I just hate waiting.'

'I know you do princess and I promise that once you are well we will try again.' Dixie let Jeff hug her, she felt better having talked to him about the baby and her fears, she wasn't even mad at Tamzin for telling Jeff what they had talked about while he was out. She lay back in the cushions and relaxed, Jeff was right, she would get herself better and then she would do everything in her power to get pregnant and be a mother.


	6. Chapter Six

**Author: Raven Shadowrose**

**Rating: T**

**Pairing: ?/?**

**Summary: Sequel to Epiphany, Jeff and Dixie are trying to have a baby, what happens when it is likely to be more difficult than they first thought?**

**Disclaimer: I do not know or own any of the characters from Casualty, any original characters and the story are my property and I do not give permission for either of them to be used.**

**A/N: This is a direct sequel to Epiphany, please read that first to understand this story :) Reviews are welcome :)**

******************Thank you to BeethovenRIP, chan. nelson4444 and Carlykinz for your support, I hope you enjoy this chapter :) xx**  


* * *

**Chapter Six.**

Dixie was feeling fed up, it had been five days since her operation, the pain was less now and she could dress herself again but she was still sitting on the couch and resting because too much activity still caused her a bit of pain when she moved about too quickly. Jeff had been a big help so far, she had really needed him to be with her when she'd had a shower, she'd found it hard to stand up for long periods so having Jeff with her and supporting her had made taking the shower easier. She felt safe with him holding her, she knew that he wouldn't let her fall. It had been quite nice sharing the shower, maybe it was something they should try when she wasn't in pain and could enjoy it more. Dixie had just about managed to persuade Jeff that she could manage on her own while he went out and walked Little Abs. Jeff really meant well but sometimes she needed time to herself, she tried not to snap at him but she had found it hard at times and those were the times that she told Jeff to take Little Abs for a walk.

Dixie just wanted to be back at work now, Tamzin had helped with the feelings of missing work and doing her job, she had visited several times and told her all of the gossip and some of the shouts that she'd been on. She was pleased that Tamzin seemed to be growing in confidence and was handling the running of the station. Tamzin had also filled her in on her relationship with Tom, they were definitely official, whenever Tamzin and Tom were free they were spending that free time together. She was happy for Tamzin, Tom made her happy, maybe at some point she would be attending their wedding. It was a lovely feeling to know that her friend was in a settled relationship, it warmed her heart to think that she had helped them get together.

Jeff had sensed Dixie's need to be alone for a little while, he was getting better at it, he hadn't wanted to leave Dixie alone much when she had first come out of hospital but her wounds were healing well and she was feeling less pain now. Dixie was herself again, he knew that she was missing work and was getting very restless now that she was feeling better. He was worried about her rushing into getting back to normal, it was why he had suggested that she take up knitting again. Knitting calmed Dixie down and helped her relax, she had a one track mind and when she focused on knitting she wasn't focused on rushing around and doing things. He didn't think that she had noticed his cunning plan, he was just glad that it was working.

Jeff had noticed the abundance of baby booties and little cardigans and jumpers that had been appearing in their house. He let her knit them as he knew that once they started trying again that Dixie would get pregnant at some point in the future. Knitting was helping Dixie cope with her recovery time and if it meant that the house was overfilled with baby clothes then so be it. Jeff opened the door and let Little Abs back in the house, he took off his boots in the kitchen and walked through the house in his socks. 'Dixie?'

'In here Jeff.' She sounded calm again, he could tell that she had been getting agitated before so he had taken the opportunity to walk the dog. He went into the lounge to find Dixie knitting again, it looked like it was going to be a jumper.

'Hello grandma.' Jeff watched Dixie look at him and raise her eyebrow. 'You look so cute all wrapped up in your little blanket.'

'Grandma? I am younger than you Jeffrey and don't you forget it.'

'Only by a year, you could definitely pass for a grandma with all the knitting that you're doing.'

'You are going to get one of these needles put in a very uncomfortable place Jeffrey if you don't stop speaking.' Jeff chuckled and sat by Dixie on the sofa.

'You don't mean that, do you?'

'Maybe, maybe not.'

'At least you're enjoying doing something.'

'I am, I'd forgotten how much I like to knit and sew.'

'At least our baby won't be short of clothing because of his or her clever mummy.'

'We can buy things for them too, I'd like to do all the things that other parents to be do as well.'

'Of course we can.'

'Good.' Jeff wanted to make Dixie happy and if it meant buying baby clothes and toys then that is what they would do.

Dixie looked at Jeff, she could imagine him playing with their child, he was a very big kid himself and secretly he would be playing with the toys for his own enjoyment. She loved him the way he was, even if there were times when he was completely inappropriate and opened his mouth when he really should have kept it closed but he would make a wonderful father. She had seen him with Sophia and John and she knew that he would look after their child and protect him or her with his life if he had to. She was looking forward to Sophia and John coming to visit them, Jeff had wanted to put it off but Dixie had told him not to. She didn't want to give Lucy any reason to tell Jeff that he couldn't have the kids and if they cancelled then she might say that she's changed her mind about the kids coming to stay. 'Jeff, are the kids still coming?'

'Yes, I know you don't want to cancel Dixie.'

'Good, I just don't want you to lose the contact you're having with them now, it is only fair that you see them. They need their dad and I would hate for Lucy to change her mind because we had to cancel.'

'Don't worry princess, I'm not going to let that happen.'

'Okay, good. Can I have a hug?'

'Of course you can.' Dixie made room for Jeff on the sofa and she snuggled up to his chest, she just felt the need to cuddle him. 'Is anything wrong princess?'

'No, I just want to cuddle and use you as a pillow.'

'Your wish is my command.' Dixie smiled and snuggled herself closer to Jeff, she had wanted some alone time before but now all she wanted was to cuddle up with the man she loved.

Jeff knew that Dixie needed him at this moment in time, she had begged him not to cancel the kids coming to stay with them. It was still under a week after Dixie's operation and Sophia and John could sometimes be a bit noisy and boisterous. Jeff played with the ends of Dixie's hair as he held her in his arms, it was still growing and she hadn't had it cut yet. Jeff liked her hair like this, he had helped Dixie to wash her hair in the shower the other day when she was still finding it hard to lift her arms and bend. It had been something he could do for her to help her feel better, he'd held her and supported her and helped her to wash. There wasn't anything sexual about it, it had just been about supporting Dixie and giving her something that she needed.

Dixie found herself relaxing even more, Jeff was playing with her hair, she liked it when he played with her hair, it relaxed her and made her feel less tense. She liked how he knew exactly what to do to help her calm down. 'Jeff, how long do you think it will be before we have a baby?'

'I don't know princess, when the time is right.'

'You're right.'

'We can't rush these things, you have a fighting chance now Dixie.'

'I know, I'm so grateful, it could have just as easily ended up that they couldn't unblock my tubes and I wouldn't have any chance at all.'

'It didn't end that way, everything is all right.'

'I know, I can't wait until we can try again.'

'There's only another week to go, you can wait until then, I know you can.'

'I know, I will, I don't want anything to mess up our chances.' Dixie snuggled back up to Jeff, he was keeping her calm and she didn't want to move away from him just yet.

Jeff just held Dixie close, he knew that they would have to move soon as he had to pick Sophia and John up. 'Princess?'

'Yes.'

'I do have to go and get John and Sophia soon.'

'I know, don't worry about me, I'll be fine.'

'Are you sure?'

'Yes, I can't wait to see them.'

'I'll pick up a takeaway on the way home and we can just relax.'

'Sounds good to me. Indian?'

'Always, I'll get your favourite.'

'Thank you.'

'You're welcome princess.' Jeff smiled, Dixie asking for Indian food meant she was well on her way to recovery, she had only been on soup and sandwiches for the past couple of days. Jeff kissed Dixie on the head and stood up. 'I'll be back soon princess.'

'I know you will, see you soon love.' Jeff closed the door behind him and went to meet Lucy to get the kids.

Dixie picked up her knitting needles once Jeff had gone and began to finish the sleeve of the jumper that she was working on. She was looking forward to seeing Sophia and John again, Sophia was so sweet and loving and Dixie liked having her around. Dixie hoped that if she had a daughter then she would be like Sophia, part of her wanted a little girl but the other part her wanted a boy and all of her wanted a baby that was healthy. She knew the risks of trying to get pregnant at her age but she also knew that she was healthy and active and that had to count for something.

Dixie was still thinking about having a healthy baby when she heard the door open and Sophia's voice. 'Dixie?'

'Hello lovely.' Dixie saw Sophia look at the cushions and blanket on the sofa and at her.

'What's wrong?'

'I just had to have an operation so I could have a baby.' Sophia climbed onto the sofa and hugged Dixie, she was being careful, as if she sensed that she might hurt her.

'Does that mean you can have a baby with my daddy now?'

'Yes, once my tummy heals I will be able to have a baby.'

'Oh good.' Dixie looked at Jeff when he came in with John.

'Hello John.'

'Hi Dixie, I'm going to help my dad with the food, he says we have to look after you.' Dixie smiled.

'Come on son, we'll leave the two ladies alone.'

'I'll see you in a few minutes.' Dixie nodded at Jeff and he escorted John from the room, Dixie could smell the food that Jeff had brought in with him and her stomach rumbled, she was glad that she was feeling hungry again.

'Dixie?'

'Yes.'

'Do all women have to have an operation so they can have a baby?'

'No, I just had to have one to help me because I had a problem with my tummy.'

'Poor Dixie, do you feel better now?'

'A little bit, I still have to rest for a little while.' Jeff came back in and Dixie smiled at him.

'Daddy, I hope you're looking after Dixie while her tummy heals.'

'I am.'

'Is he?' Sophia turned to look at Dixie. 'I can tell him off if he isn't looking after you properly.' Dixie tried to hide her smile, Sophia was really cute, she cared about people.

'I promise you, your daddy has been very good to me while I've been poorly. Come on sweet pea, I think it is time for something to eat.' Dixie let Sophia hold her hand as they walked into the kitchen, she noticed that Sophia was walking slower than she usually would, it made her feel warm and fuzzy inside. She really wanted this with her own child one day, right now she was happy taking care of Sophia and John with Jeff. They were a part of Jeff and she wanted to be a part of their lives.


	7. Chapter Seven

**Author: Raven Shadowrose**

**Rating: T**

**Pairing: ?/?**

**Summary: Sequel to Epiphany, Jeff and Dixie are trying to have a baby, what happens when it is likely to be more difficult than they first thought?**

**Disclaimer: I do not know or own any of the characters from Casualty, any original characters and the story are my property and I do not give permission for either of them to be used.**

**A/N: This is a direct sequel to Epiphany, please read that first to understand this story :) Reviews are welcome :)**

**********************Thank you to BeethovenRIP, chan. nelson4444 and Carlykinz for your lovely reviews, welcome to olivia. 1 and than you for favouriting and following, I hope you all enjoy this chapter xx**  


* * *

**Chapter Seven.**

Dixie woke up early, Jeff was taking John to play football in the park today. She wanted them to have some proper father and son time together. Jeff had missed out on a lot over the years and it was important for both him and John to make up for the time that they had missed. She had suggested the trip to them last night and Jeff had agreed, he would spend some time with Sophia later on.

Dixie looked at Jeff, he was still sleeping, she would wake him soon but for now she wanted to be alone with her thoughts. Jeff had been wonderful during all of this, he had put up with her moods and her moments when she just wanted to be alone. The end of her recovery was in sight, she could see the day when she would be back at work and doing the job that she loved.

Dixie was relying on the painkillers less now, something that she was pleased about, she still had odd moments when she had little bits of pain but it had improved a great deal. She had decided that taking it easy was a good idea, if she tried to do too much too soon then she might end up off work for longer and that was not too appealing to her

Dixie reached over and gently shook Jeff awake. 'Morning Jeff.'

'Morning Dix.'

'We should get up, you're taking John to play football today.'

'I know, I wish we could have them here for longer.'

'I know you do, you won't have to wait much longer, the school holidays are in a couple of months and we have two weeks off so they can come and stay with us.' Dixie put her hand on Jeff's shoulder, she sympathised with him, having his kids so far away wasn't easy and she knew that he missed them.

'It is the only thing that is keeping me going Dixie, that and the thought that you will be pregnant and having a baby soon.'

'Come here love.' Dixie hugged Jeff, she just knew that he needed her now. 'You're a good dad Jeff, nobody can ever doubt that.'

'I am glad you have so much faith in me.'

'I do.' Dixie leaned in and kissed Jeff, there was no doubt in her mind that Jeff was a good dad. 'Now, let's get up, I'll make breakfast while you get the kids up.'

'All right, thanks Dixie.'

'I love you Jeff.'

'I love you too.' Dixie kissed Jeff again, she was missing the closeness of being with him but she knew that she still had a while to go before they could start practising for a baby. Dixie pulled away when she felt Jeff's hand on her leg. 'Jeff, you know that we can't.'

'I know, I am counting the days until we can be together again. Unless you end up in pain, I read that sometimes women can find sex a little uncomfortable the first time after the operation.'

'We'll just try, if I find it uncomfortable then I'll tell you and we can leave it until another time.'

'Okay, but promise me that you'll tell me, I don't want to hurt you.'

'I promise.'

'Good.'

'Come on Jeff, we have lots to do today.' Dixie got out of the bed and wrapped her dressing gown around herself, she really was glad that there wasn't long left until they could be together again.

Jeff got himself dressed and went into the room that Sophia and John were sharing, they had bought them separate beds to sleep in and a wardrobe to keep their things in whenever they came to stay. 'Come on kids, time to get up.'

'I'm already awake daddy.'

'Good morning my little princess.' Jeff gave Sophia a hug and then hugged John. 'Good morning John, are you looking forward to football?'

'I am, I can't wait to play with you dad.'

'Come on, Dixie is making breakfast, then once you are ready we can go and play.' Jeff smiled as Sophia and John jumped out of bed and he heard them running down the stairs. It was going to hurt having to let them go back to Lucy but he had to see them, feeling the hurt when he had to take them home was preferable to not seeing them at all.

Jeff went downstairs to find John and Sophia sat at the table with cereal and toast in front of them, Dixie was pottering about and pouring coffee into cups. Jeff smiled, he could get used to this. He loved domestic Dixie, she seemed so at home cooking and looking after Sophia and John. He went into the kitchen and kissed Dixie on the cheek, he took the coffee that she held out and drank some of it. 'Thanks princess.' He joined Sophia and John at the table and helped himself to some of the toast that Dixie had put in the rack. He was pleased that his kids had such good appetites and were very healthy. 'Okay kids, you need to get washed and dressed.' Sophia and John jumped up and went back upstairs to get themselves ready for the day.

Dixie smiled, Sophia and John were very well behaved and she loved having them around. She did the washing up and placed it on the draining board. 'Are you okay Jeff?'

'Yeah, I am, I'm just going to miss them when they have to go back.'

'Don't worry about that now, just go out and enjoy the day with your son.'

'You're so smart.'

'Yes I am.'

'What will you do when I'm out with John?'

'We are going to make a cake.'

'Are you sure you'll be all right?'

'Yes, don't worry Jeff, I am a lot better now. If I feel tired then I will rest.'

'Okay, that's good enough for me.' Dixie smiled, she was happy that Jeff trusted her, she wouldn't anything to jeopardise her recovery.

Jeff found John dressed in his football kit. 'Are you ready to go?'

'I am, I want to play.'

'Let's go.' John went downstairs and Jeff went over to Sophia. 'My little princess, I have a big task for you. Will you look after Dixie while I'm out?'

'Of course I will, I'm going to be a nurse one day daddy.'

'You will make a very good nurse.'

'Dixie said we can make a cake, maybe I'll be a chef too.' Jeff smiled, Sophia sounded so serious about her future career. 'Don't worry daddy, Dixie will be fine with me, I'll look after her.'

'I know you will princess.' Jeff kissed Sophia on the head. 'I'll see you later, I'm taking your brother out for while.'

'Have fun daddy.' Jeff smiled, his daughter was so loving and caring and she had really taken to Dixie, he took Sophia's hand and they went down to were John and Dixie were waiting. 'Okay, we're going now, have fun while we're out ladies.'

'We will.' Jeff kissed Dixie and hugged her. 'Enjoy the football, don't break a leg Jeff, I need you in one piece for when we go back to work.'

'Don't worry, I'll be careful.' Jeff waved at Dixie and Sophia and let John out of the house.

Dixie turned to Sophia. 'Now that the men have gone shall we make a cake?'

'Yes, I like cake.'

'Me too.' Dixie took all of the ingredients out of the cupboard and fridge and put them on the table. 'I like chocolate cake even more.'

'So do I, chocolate cake is my favourite.'

'Then we're agreed, chocolate cake it is.' Dixie put the bowl in front of Sophia. 'Do you want to mix it up for me?'

'Yes, I do.'

'Excellent.' Dixie carefully weighed out the ingredients into the bowl and Sophia carefully mixed them up as Dixie added them one by one.

'I like doing this Dixie, I like cooking.'

'You're very good at it.'

'I still think I want to be a nurse.'

'You don't have to decide just yet, you have plenty of time.'

'Is it ready to go in yet?'

'Yes, the oven is ready and waiting.'

'I can't wait to eat it.' Dixie put the cake in the oven and set the timer.

'For now, we get to do the best bit.'

'What's that?'

'There's always some cake mix left in the bowl.' Dixie took some of the leftover cake mix out of the bowl and ate it. 'Go on, it tastes lovely.' Sophia stuck her finger in the bowl and stuck it in her mouth.

'It's yummy.' Dixie smiled, she was definitely looking forward to being a mother.

Jeff watched John run around with the ball, he'd improved so much since the last time he'd watched his son play football. He was brilliant at scoring, it really made him proud that his son had found something that he really liked doing and he was excelling at it. 'Come here John.' John ran over and picked up the ball when he was in front of Jeff. 'You're really good, I can tell you've been practising.'

'I do, I practise every day.'

'Do you think you will want to be a footballer one day?'

'I don't know, I like playing football now but I might want to be something different when I grow up. Maybe I will become a paramedic like you dad.'

'I wish I could see you a lot more, you do know that don't you?'

'I do, I wish I could see you more too dad. Sophia misses you a lot, she counts down the days until she can see you again.'

'I do the same. I love you both so much.'

'I love you too dad.' Jeff hugged his son, he was so happy that Sophia and John looked forward to seeing him, it meant that they still loved him.

'Come on, Dixie and Sophia should have a cake ready for us to eat by now.'

'I like cake.'

'Me too.' Jeff held the football and took John back to the car, he was looking forward to spending the rest of the evening with his kids and Dixie, he had forgotten how much fun family life could be.

Dixie took the cake out of the oven. 'Is it ready Dixie?'

'It is, it just needs to cool down and then we can eat it when your dad and John get back.'

'Yay, I can't wait.'

'Come and sit with me on the sofa until then.'

'Are you tired Dixie? Are you hurting?'

'No sweet pea, I just want to have a sit down.'

'Good, because daddy said I had to look after you while he was out.'

'Did he?'

'Yes, he wants to make sure that you are well.'

'I know, I am nearly better.' Dixie smiled, she wasn't surprised that Jeff had asked Sophia to look after her. It really made her smile, she loved the fact that the little girl was taking her job so seriously.

'Are you? Does that mean you'll go back to work and drive your ambulance?'

'It does.'

'Are you in charge of daddy?'

'I am, and lots of other people too.'

'I like that you save people Dixie.'

'I like saving people too.' Dixie put her arm around Sophia as they cuddled up on the sofa, today had been very good fun, she wished that there were more days like this. She still had the rest of the day with the kids and Jeff, she couldn't wait until the school holidays and she could spend more time with them all.


	8. Chapter Eight

**Author: Raven Shadowrose**

**Rating: M  
**

**Pairing: ?/?**

**Summary: Sequel to Epiphany, Jeff and Dixie are trying to have a baby, what happens when it is likely to be more difficult than they first thought?**

**Disclaimer: I do not know or own any of the characters from Casualty, any original characters and the story are my property and I do not give permission for either of them to be used.**

**A/N: This is a direct sequel to Epiphany, please read that first to understand this story :) Reviews are welcome :)**

**************************Thank you to BeethovenRIP, chan. nelson4444 and Carlykinz for your lovely reviews, welcome to piglet 9163. Please note that the rating has been increased to M as Jeff and Dixie are naughty :)  
**

* * *

**Chapter Eight.**

Dixie was glad to be back at work, she'd missed the normality of it. She'd gone for her check up on Friday and her doctor agreed that she was well enough to go back to work. He'd also warned her that as she was so close to ovulating there was a small chance that she could end up pregnant. It was a rare phenomenon but sometimes women that have had a laparoscopy end up pregnant quickly. The percentage was very low so she put it out of her mind. The odds were that it would take her some time to get back to normal where her cycle was concerned, she had been due on a day or so ago and as of yet she hadn't seen any signs of starting. She was going to spend the evening with Jeff later on and they were going to take things slowly and see if they could make love. Dixie was hoping that as she wasn't in pain now that they would be able to resume trying for a baby.

Tamzin knocked on Dixie's door, it was open but she didn't want to assume that she could just walk in. 'It is good to see you sat there again Dixie.'

'It is good to be back. Thank you for taking care of everything while I was off.'

'It was the least I could do, you were going through enough.'

'You did a very good job Tamzin, you sell yourself short and you really shouldn't. I hope you realise just what you can do now. You've been in charge for a fortnight and you've done brilliantly.'

'Thanks Dixie.'

'I mean it, I'd better watch my back, you'll be after my job soon.'

'I'd never do that Dixie.'

'I'm joking, don't take it so seriously.'

'Right, I'll try.' Tamzin breathed deeply, she really thought that Dixie was serious for a moment. Being in charge had been easier than she thought but she wasn't in any hurry to do it again. 'I'll see you later, I just wanted to make sure that you are well enough to be back at work.'

'I am, don't worry about me, I wouldn't be here if I wasn't.'

'I know, Jeff wouldn't let you be here.'

'Exactly.' Tamzin nodded and went to find Norman, he wasn't so bad when you got to know him properly and he had been a big help when Tamzin was in charge.

Jeff was craving coffee, he'd agreed with Dixie that they would give up coffee while they were trying for a baby. He'd also agreed to go without alcohol too, he really wanted Dixie to have the best possible chance of having a baby. Somehow water and juice were not the same but he was willing to try. Dixie had given up chocolate and he knew how hard that was going to be for her so he really wanted to keep his promise not to have coffee. He poured himself another juice and drank it down. Jeff had a few reservations about this evening, what if he hurt Dixie while they were making love? He hoped that she would tell him if she was too uncomfortable or sore to continue. Jeff decided that he would take things slowly and be gentle with Dixie, he knew that she wanted to get back to normal and making love was one of the ways that she could do that. He could tell that she was happy being back at work, Dixie was not the type of person that wanted to sit at home and he had a feeling that she had only agreed to rest because she wanted a baby so much.

Dixie sat in her office and caught up on the reports from while she had been away, Tamzin had been very thorough and there was no stone left unturned. It had been a risk putting Tamzin in charge but a risk that had paid off, she had taken charge and done an extremely good job. Dixie prided herself on her judgement and how she just knew what people would be best at. She thought over everything that she had been doing to help herself get pregnant. She'd started taking folic acid and vitamins, cutting all caffeine and alcohol out of her diet and she'd started eating more vegetables and fruit. She would do whatever it took to make herself ready for having a baby. Dixie felt the odd craving for chocolate and coffee but she was ignoring them, they would go away in time.

Jeff looked at Tamzin, she was carrying a cup of coffee, he was instantly jealous of her, he had managed all day without coffee but now he was finding it hard. 'Hi Jeff, is there something wrong?'

'I'm not allowed coffee.'

'Oh, because of you two trying to have a baby.'

'Yes, I know I said I'd give it up to support Dixie but I am finding it very hard.'

'Tough it out Jeff.'

'I wish it was that easy. Could I have a bit of yours?'

'No, I'm not going to give you some of my coffee. You made a promise to Dixie and I'm not going to help you break it.'

'Please Tamzin.'

'No.'

'You're mean.'

'You could always drink water instead.'

'I don't want water, water doesn't wake me up.'

'Go to bed earlier.' Jeff pouted and folded his arms, he really hoped that Dixie got pregnant soon, it was going to be really hard living without coffee.

Dixie went into the rec room to see Jeff glaring at Tamzin. 'What is going on?'

'Nothing.'

'Nice try Jeff, you're scowling like someone has just taken your favourite toy away. Let me guess, you're craving coffee.'

'How do you know?'

'I am craving it too, it'll pass we just have to tough it out until it does.'

'You're way too chirpy, how are you ignoring it?'

'I know that the eventual gain will be worth the sacrifice.'

'I am going out of my mind here Dixie.'

'I'm sure our evening together will distract you from your coffee cravings.'

'What am I meant to do until then?'

'Drink water or juice.'

'I've tried that.'

'Jeff, it won't last long.' Dixie was trying to keep her composure, she was finding it hard too and she was finding it even harder to keep her temper under wraps while Jeff was being like this.

Tamzin looked at Dixie and Jeff, she could sense the tension rising in the room. 'I think you two should have a break, maybe go in different rooms for now. You're obviously finding this tough and if you keep this up then you are going to argue.'

'We're not arguing.'

'Not yet, Dixie why don't you go to your office and take a few minutes. Jeff, you go and check the ambulance is ready for the next crew, it'll help take your mind off wanting coffee.' Jeff was the first to stand up and leave the rec room, Tamzin was surprised that he had done as she said. 'You really have learned something by being in charge Tamzin.' Dixie sounded impressed.

'I learned from the best, I learned from you.'

'No, really?'

'Yes really.' Tamzin chuckled at Dixie's silence. 'I have some advice for you. Jeff is finding it hard and so are you, if you find it is getting heated, and I don't mean the good kind of heated, then take time out and go in separate rooms. I split you up to stop you fighting with each other. You're not going to make me an aunty if you're fighting.'

'You're right. Thanks Tamzin, I think I might take that few minutes now.'

'Good, I'll see you tomorrow, hopefully with both of you in a better mood.'

'See you tomorrow.' Tamzin smiled at Dixie, she really hoped that Jeff and Dixie's coffee cravings faded soon, she wasn't looking forward to having to get in between them all the time like she'd had to do today.

Jeff found himself relaxing more as the evening went on, it was easier now that he was at home and he could just sit down and do very little. He'd done as Tamzin suggested and checked on the ambulance for the next crew, he didn't think it would help much but by the time he'd finished he found that he'd stopped thinking about wanting coffee so much. He'd apologised to Dixie for being a bit childish and then took her home, she was no doubt feeling the effects of it too. They'd had dinner and settled down to watch the television for a little while. Eventually Dixie had suggested that they go to bed and that's where they were now. 'Dixie, you will tell me if I hurt you or if you need to stop won't you?'

'I will, I promised remember.'

'I know, I just don't want you in pain.'

'You're a sweet man Jeff, now kiss me.'

'Your wish is my command.' Jeff leaned in and captured Dixie's lips with his, his hand moved up underneath her pyjama top and he caressed her skin. Jeff realised how much he had missed being with Dixie like this, up until the news that Dixie had blocked tubes they'd had a very active sex life. He moved to Dixie's neck and placed little kisses there, he knew that she liked it when he did this and he peppered little kisses over the sensitive spot at the hollow of her throat. Jeff felt Dixie's hands wandering around his body, he really hoped that he wasn't going to hurt her.

Dixie moaned as Jeff's lips caressed her throat, she moved her hands over the surface of his skin. 'Jeff, I need you.'

'Are you sure Dixie?'

'Touch me, please.' Dixie lifted her arms and let Jeff pull her top off, the rest of their clothes soon followed and Jeff stroked her bare skin.

'I love you Dixie.'

'I love you too.'

'Are you sure about this?'

'I am, I need you, I need this.'

'Okay princess.' Dixie lay back in the covers and pulled Jeff to her.

'Jeff, I'm not a porcelain doll, you won't break me.'

'I just don't want to hurt you.'

'You won't.'

'How do you know?'

'Because you don't have it in you.' Dixie kissed Jeff and moved her hand up and down his back, she wanted her husband to make love to her, she wanted everything to be back to normal.

Jeff felt desire flood through his body, Dixie always knew where to touch to turn him on. 'Dixie, I want you.'

'Take me Jeff.' Jeff moved his hand down Dixie's body and settled it at the top of her thigh, he gently parted her legs and slipped his fingers inside her.

'How does that feel?'

'It's okay, it doesn't hurt.' He slowly moved his fingers experimentally to see how it affected her and Dixie moaned, clearly she was enjoying herself. 'I want you inside me Jeff.'

'All right.' Jeff gently fitted himself inside Dixie, he moved slowly so as to avoid hurting her. 'Everything okay princess?'

'It is a bit uncomfortable but I'm not in pain.'

'Good.' Jeff kissed Dixie on the head and just stayed still inside her. 'Are you ready princess?'

'Yes.' Jeff slowly moved inside Dixie's body and kissed her, swallowing the moans that emanated from her mouth, it wasn't long before he felt her tighten around his length and her fingers dug into his shoulders. 'Oh Jeff, I've missed this.' Jeff barely heard her whisper those words to him.

'Me too princess.' Jeff moved a bit faster, Dixie wasn't in any pain and he hoped that it would remain that way. Jeff moved deep inside Dixie, her moans told him that he wasn't hurting her, he moaned and buried his head in Dixie's neck as he came inside her.

Dixie opened her eyes and tried to slow her breathing, she'd missed having Jeff inside her, it hadn't hurt and she'd loved every minute. She wrapped her arms around Jeff and kissed him. 'I love you Jeff.'

'I love you too princess.' She snuggled up to Jeff as he pulled the quilt around them both.

'Do you feel better now?'

'How do you mean Dixie?'

'I mean are you still thinking about your coffee withdrawal?'

'What coffee withdrawal?' Dixie smiled and settled her head on Jeff's chest, she might not get pregnant right away but there was nothing stopping it from happening and it would happen when the time was right. Dixie snuggled closer to Jeff, they had got over the first hurdle of trying for a baby and there was nothing stopping them from getting in plenty of practise.


	9. Chapter Nine

**Author: Raven Shadowrose**

**Rating: M  
**

**Pairing: ?/?**

**Summary: Sequel to Epiphany, Jeff and Dixie are trying to have a baby, what happens when it is likely to be more difficult than they first thought?**

**Disclaimer: I do not know or own any of the characters from Casualty, any original characters and the story are my property and I do not give permission for either of them to be used.**

**A/N: This is a direct sequel to Epiphany, please read that first to understand this story :) Reviews are welcome :)**

******************************Thank you to BeethovenRIP, chan. nelson4444 for reviewing the last chapter. **

******************************Anything that happens in this chapter has been researched before I put it in, Tamzin's use of the Glasgow Coma Scale comes from Wikipedia.  
**

* * *

**Chapter Nine.**

Dixie sat in her office, her periods were back to normal and her second one was due any time now. She pulled out her calendar and checked off another day, she'd been doing this since her and Jeff had started trying for a baby again. She would mark off every day until she ended up pregnant, so far she had marked off eight weeks worth of days. It saddened her a little to think that she still wasn't pregnant but the rational side of herself knew that it would happen now, when the time was right. Marking the days off helped her feel a bit calmer about the whole thing, it gave her something to focus on, gave her hope that one day she would be able to stop marking the days off and be able to tell Jeff that she was pregnant.

Dixie was feeling off and tired and had been for a couple of days. Her coffee cravings had completely vanished and she was dealing with drinking water and juice instead. She had surprised herself by gaining a liking for peppermint tea. Dixie wouldn't be surprised if her period started in a day or two, she was getting all the usual symptoms; the mood swings, sore breasts, headaches and occasional moments of weepiness. Her chocolate cravings were back with a vengeance and she was determined to ignore them but they really were hard to ignore right now. Everyone seemed to be getting on her nerves today so she was staying out of their way. She knew that it was because she had stopped taking the pill, it was the only thing that kept back her period symptoms.

Dixie had decided that staying in to do the paperwork for the week was probably a good idea, she had a very short fuse and even the littlest thing would set her off. She rubbed her forehead, the painkillers were kicking in slowly, she could feel the pain easing. The door opened and Dixie saw Jeff stood there. 'Dixie, are you all right?'

'Jeff, could you work with Will today?'

'I can, but you didn't answer my question. Are you okay?'

'I'm just feeling the effects of not being on the pill. I'm not the best person to be out there right now, one wrong word from any person today and I will lose my temper.'

'I understand. You look pale though, maybe you should go home and rest.'

'It is just the headache, once it eases fully I'll be back to normal.'

'Are you sure?'

'Yes, I'm just going to stay here and work on the rotas and so on until I feel more like my normal self.'

'Okay, try not to do too much while you're feeling unwell.' Dixie smiled at Jeff as he kissed her on the head. 'I'll see you later princess.'

'See you later Jeff.' Dixie was happy that she had such a supportive husband, she was a bit down because her period was well on the way, it confirmed what the test said, she wasn't pregnant. Despite dismissing the what the doctor had said about getting pregnant early after her operation, she had held a little hope that maybe it would have been true, maybe just once she would get lucky and get what she wanted.

Jeff left Dixie in her office and went to find Tamzin, he wanted to ask a favour of her, he found her in the rec room. 'Tamzin, I need a favour.'

'You're not having my coffee.'

'No, that's not what I want. Will you check on Dixie when I'm not around, she's not feeling very well and I can't be here all the time.'

'Of course I will, what's wrong with her?'

'She's having a hard time with her hormones and being off the pill.'

'I see, don't worry Jeff, I'll check on her.'

'Thanks Tamzin, you're a star.'

'I'll keep in touch with you and tell you if I think she should go home.'

'Okay, that makes me feel so much better.'

'No problem, she's my friend and so are you, I'll do whatever I can to help you.' Jeff put his hand on Tamzin's shoulder, he really was grateful to her for all the help that she was giving them.

Dixie sat with her eyes closed for a few minutes, her headache was resurfacing again, it had never been like this before. She thought that her disappointment over not being pregnant was making the headaches worse. Dixie took a deep breath and tried to relax, she sighed when she heard the knock on the door. 'Go away, I'm not here.'

'I think we both know that isn't true Dixie.' Dixie saw Tamzin stood in the doorway.

'Tamzin, sorry, I'm just having a tough time right now.'

'I know, I came to see if you wanted something to drink. You need a time out.'

'Perhaps you're right, can I have a peppermint tea please?'

'Coming up.' Dixie rubbed her temples again in an attempt to make her headache disappear, if this kept up she might take Jeff up on his offer to go home. Dixie stood up and closed her eyes as the room started to spin, she steadied herself by placing her hand on the edge of the desk. Dixie was starting to feel very dizzy, she tried to make it back to her chair but the dizziness became too much for her and she blacked out by her desk.

Tamzin made Dixie's drink, she wanted to help Dixie feel better, Tamzin was worried as Dixie was looking very pale. Tamzin picked up Dixie's mug and took it to her office, she knocked on the door. 'Dixie,' she called when she didn't get an answer. Tamzin started to worry, it wasn't like Dixie not to answer. 'Dixie?' Tamzin pushed open the door and saw Dixie lying on the floor. She rushed to her side. 'Dixie, Dixie can you hear me? Can you open your eyes?' Dixie's eyes slowly opened and then closed again. Tamzin gently pinched Dixie's thumb to see if she responded, Dixie muttered something that Tamzin couldn't hear and moved her hand away. 'Can I have some help in here?' Tamzin shouted as loudly as she could, she turned her attention back to Dixie. She quickly checked Dixie's breathing and pulse, her pulse was definitely on the quick side and her hands were a bit cold. Tamzin looked at the door when Jess appeared there. 'Jess, can you get me the trolley please?'

'What happened?'

'I don't know, I just found her like this.' Jess nodded and Tamzin held Dixie's hand. 'It's okay Dixie, we're going to get you sorted.' Tamzin and Jess put Dixie on the trolley and wheeled her quickly towards the E.D.

Zoe came over the minute she saw them enter the building. 'What happened?'

'I don't know she was just lying on the floor. Kathleen Collier, 36, found collapsed in her office, she's tachycardic with a pulse rate of a hundred, her hands are cold and she's been complaining of being tired, she has a GCS of seven.'

'Thanks Tamzin, don't worry, we'll find out what's wrong with her.'

'You should know that she's been trying to get pregnant.'

'Okay, let's get the usual bloods done, FBC especially and test for pregnancy please. Tamzin can you let Jeff know that she's in here, he'll want to be here and I know that she'll want him here.'

'I will, take care of her for me.'

'We will, don't worry.' Tamzin looked at Dixie, she was really worried now, she felt that she had let her down somehow.

Tamzin took out her phone, she had to let Jeff know straight away that Dixie wasn't well and was in hospital. She listened to it ring and waited for Jeff to answer her. 'Hello?'

'Jeff, you need to get back here, it's Dixie.'

'What's wrong?'

'I found her passed out in her office, she's in the E.D. Zoe is looking after her.'

'I'm coming, we're a few minutes away, we've just had a hoax call so I won't be long.'

'Okay, hurry.' Tamzin put the phone down again and held onto it, she didn't want to worry Jeff but he had to know that Dixie was in the hospital. For the second time that day she really felt as if she had left Jeff and Dixie down.

Dixie found herself lying in bed, when had she got into bed? Dixie moved her arm and groaned, it was painful, she heard someone walking around near her. 'Dixie, can you hear me? It's Zoe.'

'Zoe?' She must be in the E.D. Dixie struggled to put the events of the day in order, how had she ended up in hospital? 'What happened?'

'Tamzin found you unconscious.'

'What's wrong with me?'

'I don't know yet, I'm waiting for your blood test results to come back.'

'Blood test, so that's why my arm hurts.'

'Yes, take it easy Dixie, you've been unconscious for a while.'

'What do you think is wrong with me?'

'I can't be certain, I'm going to wait for your results to come back.' Dixie heard the bleeping from the machine next to her bed.

'Why am I linked up to the monitor?'

'You were tachycardic when you were brought in, it is just a precaution.'

'Where's Jeff?'

'Tamzin has called him, he was on a shout but he should be here soon.'

'Okay.'

'How are you feeling Dixie?'

'Tired and a bit dizzy.'

'Just rest, I will be back soon.' Dixie lay back against the pillow, Zoe's advice seemed like a good idea, she was tired and the room was still spinning a little bit.

Jeff jumped out of the ambulance and nearly ran into Tamzin. 'Where's Dixie?'

'She's in resus.'

'What?' Now he was worried, he prayed that she wasn't seriously ill.

'It's just a precaution, she blacked out on us.'

'Do they know what caused it?'

'Not yet.' Jeff went straight into resus and to Dixie's bed.

'Hello princess.'

'Jeff, I'm glad you're here.'

'You frightened me Dixie.'

'I'm sorry love, I thought how I was feeling was just something to do with my period.'

'It's okay.' Jeff kissed Dixie's head. 'Whatever it is we'll deal with it together.'

'What if it is something to do with the operation, what if they say I can't get pregnant now?'

'Hush love, that's not going to happen.'

'How do you know?' Jeff hugged Dixie, he understood that she was afraid and that she needed his hug more than she needed his words right now.

Dixie just clung onto Jeff, she needed his reassurance and the warmth of his body, it helped soothe her when nothing else could. She was still holding onto him when Zoe came into the room. 'Dixie, I have the results of your blood test.'

'What's wrong with me?'

'You have iron deficiency anaemia, it is why you blacked out.'

'When can I go home?'

'There's something we have to discuss first.' Dixie gripped Jeff's shirt, what if there was something seriously wrong with her?

'Which is?'

'Are you aware that you're pregnant?' Dixie just looked at Zoe in shock. 'Tamzin told us you had been trying for a baby and we had you tested to make sure that we weren't missing anything. It is the likely cause of your anaemia.'

'But I took a test, it was negative, are you certain?'

'Yes, we tested your blood, we are certain that you're pregnant.'

'Oh.' Dixie was struggling to take it all in, she was pregnant. 'Would my blacking out have hurt the baby?'

'No, it is highly unlikely but I have organised a scan to make sure, you'll need to see the clinic anyway so it may as well be now. They're going to give you some iron supplements to make sure that this doesn't happen again.'

'Thanks Zoe.'

'No worries, congratulations to both of you.' Dixie turned to Jeff when Zoe had left resus.

'Jeff, we're having a baby.'

'I know princess.'

'Now I know why I was feeling so rubbish. I just thought I was having bad period symptoms, they're all things I've experienced before I was on the pill.'

'Don't worry about it now princess, the iron supplements will help you get better.'

'I know, it's probably not the best start to being pregnant though.' Dixie snuggled into Jeff, she was happy, a few hours ago she thought that she was going to have wait another month to get pregnant but now everything was different, she knew that there was a baby in her belly and she was going to be a mother at long last.

Jeff kissed Dixie's head, he felt the sudden urge to protect her, she was carrying his baby and he didn't want anything to happen to either of them. 'Dixie, what are you going to do now?'

'I can stay as I am for now, working on the crew and so on. Then when I'm about five months I will start working at ambulance dispatch. I probably won't be able to work on an ambulance for longer than that.'

'You've thought this through haven't you?'

'I have, don't worry Jeff, I won't do anything that causes harm to me or the baby. I'll be careful.'

'I know you will.' Jeff placed his hand on Dixie's belly. 'I love you Dixie.'

'I love you too.' Jeff held Dixie close to him, he saw the change in Dixie now that she knew she was pregnant, she looked happy and relaxed even if she was still a bit pale.

Tamzin popped her head around the resus door. 'Can I come in?'

'Of course you can.'

'Hi Dixie, you're awake.'

'They told me that you found me, thank you.'

'You're welcome Dixie, do you know what is wrong yet?' Tamzin saw the look that Jeff and Dixie shared. 'What is it?'

'You tell her princess.'

'I have anaemia, they can sort it out with iron tablets though.'

'Oh, I'm glad it isn't serious, I was worried about you Dixie.

'There's something else.'

'What is it?'

'I'm pregnant.'

'Oh my goodness, are you serious?'

'Very.' Tamzin ran over and hugged Jeff and Dixie.

'I am so pleased for you both. I'm going to be an aunty, congratulations.'

'I think Tamzin is happy Dixie.'

'I think she is.' Tamzin hugged Jeff and Dixie one last time.

'I'll leave you alone now.'

'Thanks for coming Tamzin.'

'You're welcome.' Tamzin quietly closed the door to resus, she was so happy that Dixie and Jeff were going to have a baby, she loved them both and now they were going to have the baby that they wanted. Tamzin started thinking, she wanted to get them something nice for the baby and she knew exactly what she going to do, it would take her some time to do but it would be perfect.


	10. Chapter Ten

**Author: Raven Shadowrose**

**Rating: M  
**

**Pairing: ?/?**

**Summary: Sequel to Epiphany, Jeff and Dixie are trying to have a baby, what happens when it is likely to be more difficult than they first thought?**

**Disclaimer: I do not know or own any of the characters from Casualty, any original characters and the story are my property and I do not give permission for either of them to be used.**

**A/N: This is a direct sequel to Epiphany, please read that first to understand this story :) Reviews are welcome :)**

******************************Thank you to BeethovenRIP, chan. nelson4444 and Carlykinz for reviewing the last chapter, they are very much appreciated. **

******************************A transvaginal ultrasound is typically used for a woman under eight weeks pregnant due to the higher chance of seeing the foetus.  
**

* * *

**Chapter Ten.**

Dixie allowed Jeff to take her up to the ante-natal clinic in a wheelchair, she was still feeling a bit weak from when she had collapsed earlier otherwise she would have complained about it. It was still sinking in that she was pregnant, she wondered how far along she was, probably not very far if she had taken the test a bit on the early side as she suspected that she had. There was a lot to think about, she would have to arrange to work at ambulance dispatch when she was further along and then maternity leave nearer the time to her due date. Tamzin would cover for her while she was away but there was a lot she had to think about besides work too. Preparing for the baby was going to take a lot of work, they were going to have to sort out a nursery and all of the things that he or she would need. Dixie knew that Jeff would spoil the baby rotten if she let him.

Dixie and Jeff found a nurse waiting for them when they went into the clinic, she wanted to know how far along she was and whether things were progressing as they should. 'Mrs Collier, we've been expecting you, follow me.'

'Can Jeff come in with me?'

'Of course he can.'

'Thank you.' Dixie was relieved that Jeff could go into the room with her. The nurse showed them to a side room and closed the door, she pulled the curtain back.

'We're going to do a transvaginal ultrasound as we believe you to be under eight weeks pregnant. If you could remove your trousers and underwear please and get on the bed, I'll be with you shortly.' Dixie let Jeff help her undress and get onto the bed, she was feeling a bit better but he really wanted to help her so she let him. The nurse came back and covered Dixie's legs with a sheet, Dixie watched the nurse prepare the equipment.

'Okay Mrs Collier, just relax and breathe deeply, you'll feel a small amount of discomfort but it won't last long.' Dixie took a few deep breaths and reached for Jeff's hand, she smiled when she felt his fingers close around hers. Dixie winced, the nurse was right about it feeling uncomfortable.

'You're doing well princess.' Dixie felt Jeff squeeze her hand, she felt better because he with was with her, it was easier to relax with him by her side. Dixie looked at the monitor, she couldn't see anything but the nurse clearly could.

'You're four weeks pregnant, the gestational sac is just visible here.' Dixie looked where the nurse was pointing and she could just see a little round area that looked different from the rest of the screen.

'Is everything all right?'

'Everything looks normal for the stage you're at.'

'Thank you, that makes me feel so much better.'

'You're welcome.' Dixie could hardly believe that something so small would one day become a baby. Dixie rested her hand on her stomach, she vowed to protect the baby that was just beginning its life inside of her belly.

Jeff helped Dixie dress again once the nurse had finished the scan, she still looked pale and accepted his help without complaint so she must still be feeling a bit weak. He was glad that Dixie was pregnant, he had shared her worries that she might not get pregnant but he had not let her see that he was worried. He had to be the strong one while they were trying for a baby. It had been very hard at the beginning when it felt like every moment of every day was filled with cravings for coffee and beer. He was tempted to start drinking coffee again but now that he had gone without it for two months he didn't really miss it, Dixie would more than likely stay off coffee while she was pregnant so he was going to do the same to support her. He'd also noticed that he'd lost some weight from around his middle, probably due to the fact that he hadn't been drinking beer lately, that and all the practising to have a baby was likely to have burned a lot of calories too. Jeff wondered how their life would change now that Dixie was pregnant, he would be a bit more cautious and look out for her more on shouts, he wished that she was going to work for ambulance dispatch earlier but he knew what she would say to that. He trusted Dixie, she would be sensible and not do anything to endanger herself or the baby.

Dixie took the arm that Jeff held out and they went out into the waiting area where the nurse was waiting for them. 'I have organised your first appointment for just before your tenth week, we'll fill all of the forms in and do a few tests to determine your due date and make sure that you are in perfect health. In the meantime I would like you to read through these leaflets and note down any questions that you may have. I also have the iron supplements that you will need, once you have taken these to get your levels back to normal you can start taking a normal supplement that has 30mg of iron in.'

'Thank you.' Dixie took the tablets and the leaflets from the nurse, most of what the nurse had said had gone over her head, she would read through the leaflets later and try to make more sense of everything. She still had the image from the monitor in her mind, that tiny little being inside her that was the result of the love that she and Jeff shared.

Dixie and Jeff went back down to the station to find Tamzin waiting for them in Dixie's office. 'Hey, how did it go?'

'I'm four weeks pregnant.'

'Is everything all right?'

'Yes, the nurse said that everything is normal.'

'Good, how are you feeling?'

'I'm all right, a little tired but happy.'

'You should go home, it has been a rough day for you.'

'I can't, I have to finish off my work for today.'

'It's already taken care of, I've filed all the reports from today's shift and sent them to the trust.'

'Thanks Tamzin, what would I do without you?'

'It's not a problem, go home and rest, you're off for the next fortnight aren't you?'

'We are,' Jeff said, once he could get a word in. 'I'll go and get our stuff and we can go home.' Dixie gave Jeff the key to her locker.

'Thanks love.'

'Jeff's kids are coming to stay with us for some of the holidays, though it was Lucy that suggested that they come a bit early so she could go away with her man.' Dixie lowered her voice when she talked about Lucy and the man she had replaced Jeff with, she knew how much it had hurt Jeff at the time and she didn't want him to keep dwelling on it.

'Do you think he will tell her?'

'About me being pregnant? I don't know, maybe. Sophia will want to know, she's so looking forward to having a baby brother or sister.'

'You don't trust Lucy?'

'No I don't, she would stop Jeff seeing his kids in a heartbeat if it suited her.'

'You're worried that she'll stop Jeff seeing the kids if she knows you're pregnant.'

'Yes, I am, I wouldn't put it past her to tell the kids that Jeff doesn't want to see them because he's having a new baby now.'

'Then get in there first, explain what is going on to the kids and that Jeff will always love them.'

'You're right. Thank you.'

'You should talk to Jeff too, explain your worries to him.'

'I know and I will.'

'Good, keep me informed.'

'Maybe you could come to round to our house and eat with us and the kids one night.'

'I'd like that.' Dixie smiled and hugged Tamzin, she was right, Jeff did need to know her worries about Lucy and the kids.

Jeff drove himself and Dixie home, he had been very worried today when he heard that Dixie had collapsed but out of that had come some very good news. Dixie would be fine once her iron levels returned to normal, he was going to keep a good eye on her to make sure that nothing like this happened ever again. He would make sure that she had everything that she needed during her pregnancy even if it meant going out in the middle of the night to get it for her. 'Jeff?'

'Are you all right?'

'I'm okay, I do need to talk to you though.'

'What is it princess?'

'Sophia and John, I think we need to talk to them about the baby and let them know that you'll still love them even though we are having a child.'

'Where has this come from?'

'I know Sophia wants a baby brother or sister but have you ever thought that Lucy might try to convince them that you no longer care about them?'

'Is that what you've been worried about?'

'Yes, if she finds out about us having a baby then she might decide to stop you seeing your children and I don't want to be the cause of that.'

'What do you suggest?' Jeff wasn't sure that Dixie had anything to worry about but he would put her mind at rest.

'I think we should talk to Sophia and John and explain that the new baby will not change the fact that you love them and that you'll always be their dad.'

'Okay princess, that's what we'll do, when they come here we'll sit them down and tell them everything.'

'I know you probably think I'm being paranoid but I just feel like we have to do this.'

'I understand, your fears come from a real place and I will do anything to help you get over them.'

'Thank you Jeff.'

'Anything for you princess.' Jeff hugged Dixie, she obviously didn't believe that Lucy would be so open to him seeing the kids if she knew about Dixie having a baby.

Dixie felt relieved that Jeff was taking her seriously about Lucy and the kids, she didn't want anything to come between him and his children. Jeff would have to tell Lucy sooner or later, if he didn't then Sophia would and that would be worse than Lucy finding it out from Jeff. Dixie didn't know what Lucy's reaction would be, would she care? Jeff's marriage had been over a long time before they got divorced so maybe she wouldn't care at all. She had taken Sophia and John to London and away from their father so what else was she capable of? Dixie would not let Jeff lose his kids again, she would do whatever it took to make sure that he was able to keep seeing them.

Jeff smiled, Dixie was only doing this because she cared about him, Sophia and John. He really hoped that he was right and that Lucy wouldn't take it out on Sophia and John just because he had remarried and was now having a baby with Dixie. He would talk to Sophia and John when they arrived here, that was really all he could do as Lucy was out of his control. Sophia wouldn't believe anything bad Lucy said about them, she loved Dixie and Dixie loved her. Jeff wasn't sure when he would tell Lucy about the the baby, the only thing that he did know was that he wouldn't be telling her until after Sophia and John had spent the fortnight here. He wanted time to reassure his children that nothing would change, that he would love them always just in case Dixie was right and Lucy tried to stop him from seeing them again. He knew one thing, if she did try anything like that then he would fight her every step of the way.


	11. Chapter Eleven

**Author: Raven Shadowrose**

**Rating: M  
**

**Pairing: ?/?**

**Summary: Sequel to Epiphany, Jeff and Dixie are trying to have a baby, what happens when it is likely to be more difficult than they first thought?**

**Disclaimer: I do not know or own any of the characters from Casualty, any original characters and the story are my property and I do not give permission for either of them to be used.**

**A/N: This is a direct sequel to Epiphany, please read that first to understand this story :) Reviews are welcome :)**

******************************Thank you to BeethovenRIP, chan. nelson4444 for your constant reviews and support :) **

* * *

**Chapter Eleven.**

Dixie prepared the beds for Sophia and John, they had traded the one that she used to use when it had been her room for two single ones so they could have their own beds. She couldn't wait for the kids to get here, she really missed them when they weren't around. Dixie pulled the quilts up the bed and turned out the light, she went back downstairs and made herself comfortable on the sofa. She was feeling tired after making the beds, she didn't like feeling like this, normally she could do a ten hour shift and not feel as tired as she was feeling right now. She had resigned herself to having to take the iron tablets to make herself feel better, she would do whatever it took to make herself healthy for the baby. Dixie tucked her legs under herself, she decided that resting was a very good idea. She hoped that Jeff had remembered to get some of Sophia and John's favourite foods while he was going to pick them up.

Dixie heard the door open, Jeff was obviously back with the kids, she heard them laughing and giggling together. 'Right kids, go and take your stuff into your bedroom while I go and see Dixie.'

'Okay daddy.' Dixie heard the kids run upstairs and then Jeff came in through the door carrying two pizzas.

'Hi princess, how are you feeling?'

'Tired, making the beds was harder than I thought.'

'Dixie, you should have let me do that.'

'Jeff, please don't feel like you have to wrap me in cotton wool, I might be pregnant but I'm still me.'

'I know that, now that I am back I want you to rest. A few hours ago you were unconscious in resus, I want to look after you, I don't know what I would do if anything happened to you Dixie.'

'Nothing is going to happen to me, I will rest if it makes you feel better.'

'It does, I know you think I'm being daft but I don't want to lose you, either of you.' Dixie felt Jeff's hand on her belly.

'You're not going to lose us Jeff, I promise.'

'All right, I'm going to deal with these pizzas, we have two very hungry kids upstairs.'

'Go on then love, I'll be in soon.' Dixie watched Jeff go into the kitchen, she knew he meant well and just wanted to look after her, it made her feel loved.

Jeff placed the pizza boxes on the side and got out some plates, he put some of the pizza and the fries onto each of the plates. He thought about Dixie, he just wanted to look after her and make sure that she recovered well from her anaemia. She was still a bit on the pale side and the fact that making the beds had tired her out meant that she would need to rest. He would have made the beds when he came back, it didn't surprise him that Dixie had done it herself, she wanted to continue as normal. Dixie always tried to go on when she was ill, she was determined that no cold or illness would stop her, but this time was different, she was a carrying a child now, she had to be careful. Dixie sitting on the sofa was a rare sight indeed, it meant that she knew she was feeling tired and that she needed to rest.

Dixie was still sat on the sofa when Sophia came downstairs. 'Hello gorgeous.'

'Dixie, you're pale, are you ill?' Sophia climbed onto the sofa and sat next to Dixie.

'Only a little bit, I have to take some tablets to help me feel better.'

'What's wrong with you?'

'I have a lack of iron in my blood.'

'The tablets will put it back?'

'Yes, then I will feel better.'

'Good, though I should tell my daddy off for not looking after you properly.'

'It is not your daddy's fault Sophia, this is just something that happened.'

'Okay, I'll let him get away with it this time.' Dixie laughed, Jeff was going to have a hard time getting away with anything when Sophia was around. 'How did it happen?'

'Sometimes things go wrong in your body and it needs a little help to get back on track, that is where medicine comes in.'

'It won't stop you having a baby will it?'

'No, we will still be able to have a baby.'

'Oh good, I want to have a baby sister, I've decided.'

'Then I will do my very best to give you a baby sister.'

'Good.' Sophia snuggled up to Dixie and Dixie put her arm around the young girl.

Jeff called everyone into the kitchen so they could eat, John came in first and then Sophia came through holding Dixie's hand. 'Daddy, I can't wait to have pizza.'

'Your wish is my command my little princess.'

'Come on Dixie, sit next to me.'

'All right sweetie.' Jeff smiled at Sophia and Dixie, his daughter really loved Dixie, he hoped that she would keep her loving side as she got older. Jeff handed the plates of food around and took his own, he really was hungry, today had been a rough day. He loved having his children here, it was the start of what he hoped would be a wonderful fortnight. He hoped that it would not be too hard to let them go at the end of it, for both himself and Dixie. They were going to talk to the kids after dinner, he thought it best to tell them everything on the day that they got here, at least then everything would be out in the open. Jeff satisfied himself that Dixie was eating, she would need to eat to get her strength back up while taking the iron tablets.

Jeff put the dishes in the dishwasher and set it running, he put the pizza boxes in the bin and let Little Abs out into the garden just in case he needed to do anything. Dixie would have taken the kids into the lounge by now, she would have told them that they needed to talk about something. He called Little Abs in and then closed the door. Jeff went into the lounge and found Sophia curled up on the sofa with Dixie, he loved that they were becoming so close, he sat next to John. 'Did Dixie tell you that we have something to tell you?'

'Daddy,' Sophia said. 'What do you have to tell us?'

'We found out that Dixie is going to have a baby, a baby that will be your little brother or sister.'

'Dad?' He wasn't surprised that John spoke up first.

'Yes, what is it John?'

'Does that mean you won't love us now?'

'No, I always love you and your sister. You are my children and will always be special to me, I will always be your dad. I love you both so very much and nothing is going to change that.'

'Okay, dad, can we still play football?'

'Of course we can, I will always make time for you, whenever you need me I will be there. I have enough love in my heart for you and the new baby.' Jeff gave John a hug.

'Thank you dad.'

'You are my son and I am very proud of you and the way you look after your sister.' Jeff felt his son hug him back, he hoped that he had convinced John that he would always love him.

Dixie felt Sophia's head on her stomach. 'Sophia?'

'I am trying to hear the baby, hello baby.'

'You won't hear or feel anything yet sweet pea.'

'Why not?'

'The baby is only about an inch long.'

'How big is that?' Dixie showed Sophia with her fingers how big the baby was.

'That's tiny, I want a baby too, can I have one?' Dixie laughed as Jeff nearly choked on his drink.

'You're too young Sophia, when you're older you can have a baby with someone as special to you as your daddy is to me.'

'Can I hold yours instead?'

'Of course you can, when he or she arrives you can hold him or her.'

'Yay, I am so glad. Daddy, you should look after Dixie, she has my brother or sister in her belly.'

'I will look after her, I promise.'

'Good.' Dixie let Sophia snuggle up to her, she was pleased that the kids seemed to be taking it well. How Lucy would take it was another matter.

Jeff couldn't believe that Sophia wanted a baby, he knew that it was just an innocent child talking. Sophia had always played with dolls and looked after them as if they were real children. He just knew that she would be a good mother one day. Jeff worried about Sophia, she had a good heart and he would hate to see her get hurt. He loved his kids and he was going to make sure that they knew it, he would tell them as often as they needed to hear it. He watched Dixie playing games with Sophia and John on the floor, he'd bought a load of board games for them when they'd started coming to visit. He was pleased that they were still at the age when they wanted to play with games, how long would it last? He hoped it lasted for a long time, seeing them grow up was a scary thought, he knew it was a big and sometimes bad world out there. How long would he be able to protect them from the outside world?

Dixie looked at Jeff, he looked worried about something, she made a mental note to ask him about it later on. 'Okay kids, time for bed.'

'Dixie, can we stay up a little longer?' Sophia tried her best wounded puppy expression.

'You learned that from your dad, he tries that look with me too.'

'Please, I'm not tired.' Dixie smiled as Sophia yawned.

'I think you are.'

'I want to play some more though.'

'We can play tomorrow.'

'You promise?'

'I promise.'

'Okay, I will go to bed.'

'Go on, clean your teeth and get into your pyjamas.' Dixie watched the kids run upstairs, even when they were tired they still found the energy to run upstairs. 'Come on Mr Collier, help me up.' Dixie leaned on Jeff's arm and stood up.

'I think it is time for someone else to go to bed Mrs Collier.'

'But I'm not tired.'

'I think you are.' Dixie smiled at Jeff and took his arm when he held it out. 'Come on my love.' Dixie felt Jeff's arm slip around her waist and hold her close.

Jeff kissed both Sophia and John on the head. 'Goodnight, if you need us then you know where to find us. Don't be afraid to come into our room and wake us up.'

'Okay daddy, goodnight daddy, goodnight Dixie.'

'Goodnight dad.' Jeff and Dixie kissed both of the kids one last time and turned out the light. They went into their own room and got changed for bed.

'Jeff, what is bothering you?'

'Am I that obvious?'

'Yes, so come on, tell me what is on your mind.'

'It is the kids, it's a bad world out there Dixie. When I think of the things that we see every day, it could so easily happen to John or Sophia.'

'Jeff, I know that bad things happen but your children are happy and healthy, focus on that. I know you, you're a good dad and you would never let any harm come to them.'

'What about when I'm not there?'

'As much as I don't like Lucy for what she did to you, I know that she would never let anything happen to those kids.'

'I just worry about them.'

'I know you do, you wouldn't be a dad if you didn't.'

'Maybe you're right.'

'I am, come on love, let's get some sleep.' Jeff let Dixie guide him into the bed, she was right, Lucy might be many things but she would never let any harm come to John or Sophia.

'Goodnight Dixie, I love you.'

'I love you too Jeff, goodnight.' Jeff let his hand settle on Dixie's stomach, he would protect all of his children no matter what it took.


	12. Chapter Twelve

**Author: Raven Shadowrose**

**Rating: M  
**

**Pairing: ?/?**

**Summary: Sequel to Epiphany, Jeff and Dixie are trying to have a baby, what happens when it is likely to be more difficult than they first thought?**

**Disclaimer: I do not know or own any of the characters from Casualty, any original characters and the story are my property and I do not give permission for either of them to be used.**

**A/N: This is a direct sequel to Epiphany, please read that first to understand this story :) Reviews are welcome :)**

******************************Thank you to BeethovenRIP, chan. nelson4444 for your reviews and PMs :) **

* * *

**Chapter Twelve.**

Jeff and Dixie had got up early to pack a picnic for themselves and the kids so they could spend the day at the park just playing with them and having fun. Sophia and John had been so excited when they found out that they were going out and having a picnic, it was good for them to have the time to run about and just be kids. Jeff was just watching Sophia being pushed on the swings by Dixie, they really were inseparable, it warmed his heart to hear Sophia laugh and be happy. Sophia giggled as Dixie pushed her higher each time, she was fearless and enjoying the game even though the swing was going quite fast. He had no fear for Sophia, she was in safe hands with Dixie.

Jeff's attention turned to John who was playing on the assault course, he was pleased that both of his children were happy and healthy and well taken care of. He was going to make the most of the time that he had with them while they were here. 'Dad,' John called out.

'Coming.' Jeff got up from the bench and went over to his son who was stood in front of the monkey bars.

'Can you help me, I can't reach the bars.' Jeff saw the problem, John's legs just weren't long enough.

'Come on then son.' Jeff picked John up and supported him as he moved along the bars with his hands.

'Well done, one day you will be tall enough to do that on your own.'

'Thanks dad, will I be as tall as you?'

'You just might be one day.'

'I'm going to go and finish the rest of the course.'

'Go on then.'

'Will you watch me dad?'

'I will.' Jeff watched his son run around the rest of the course, he was a natural athlete, it made him happy to be here with his children and Dixie.

Dixie sat on the other swing next to Sophia. 'Dixie?'

'Yes sweet pea.'

'Did my daddy miss us when we went away with mummy?'

'Yes, very much, he loves you both.'

'I didn't want to leave daddy but mummy made us, she said we had to go with her. I like that we can see daddy now.'

'Your daddy likes that he can see you too.'

'Mummy said that we had a new daddy, I didn't want him, I wanted my daddy.'

'Did she?'

'She did, I never forgot my daddy.'

'Sophia, promise me that you will not tell your daddy what you just told me, it would hurt him.'

'I won't, I love my daddy and he is my only daddy.' Dixie was angry, just what did Lucy think she was playing at? She was glad that Sophia hadn't forgotten Jeff or stopped loving him.

Dixie took hold of Sophia's hand and went to see Jeff. 'Daddy, Dixie pushed me on the swing and I went really high, did you see me?'

'I did, you are very brave my beautiful girl.'

'Pick me up daddy.' Dixie let go of Sophia's hand and let her go to Jeff, he picked Sophia up and sat her on his knee. 'Daddy, can we eat soon?'

'Are you hungry my little princess?'

'I am.'

'Then we'll have something to eat.' Dixie picked up the picnic basket and blanket and took it over to the grass while Jeff went to get John from the assault course, she let Sophia help her spread the blanket out and started putting the food out on top of it.

'Dixie can we have cake?'

'You can have cake once you've eaten your sandwiches.'

'Oh good, I like cake.'

'You'll like this one very much then, it is chocolate.'

'I love chocolate.'

'Just like your daddy.' Dixie smiled at Sophia who was admiring the chocolate cake sat in the middle of all the food.

Jeff brought John over to the blanket and sat next to Dixie who was putting sandwiches out onto plates and pouring drinks into the little cups they had brought with them. 'Come on everyone, eat up.' Jeff saw that Dixie was enjoying playing the mum, he left her to it, it was clearly a role that she was born for. He liked seeing this side of Dixie, he wished that he had more chances to see her looking after his kids, he tried not to think about having to give them back to Lucy at the end of the fortnight. 'Jeffrey, eat your sandwiches or you won't get any cake.'

'Daddy, you should do as Dixie says, she means it about the cake.' Jeff laughed, clearly Sophia had already asked for cake.

'I know she does my little princess.' Jeff tucked into his sandwiches and smiled, he decided to put all thoughts of giving the kids back out of his mind for now and just enjoy the time that he had with them.

Once Dixie was satisfied that the kids had eaten their sandwiches she divided up the cake and handed the first piece to John. 'There you go, enjoy.'

'Thank you Dixie.'

'You have lovely manners John.' She hadn't had much chance to get to know John but she was hoping that she would do during this fortnight. Dixie handed the other piece to Sophia and smiled when she thanked her for it.

'Do you think your daddy should get some cake Sophia?'

'Has he eaten all his dinner Dixie?'

'Yes, I think so.' Dixie looked at Jeff who was watching them decide if he should get cake or not, Sophia looked as if she was thinking very carefully about it. 'Then he should have cake.'

'What about you John, should your daddy get cake?'

'Yes, he helped me on the monkey bars earlier.'

'Looks like you get cake this time Jeffrey.' Dixie laughed at the look that Jeff gave her and handed him some of the cake, she cut herself a piece and then settled down to eat it. She had given up chocolate for the longest time and she decided that she deserved a little treat.

Jeff ate his cake and then put the plate with the others so Dixie could put them away in the basket ready for when they went home. 'Daddy, will you play with me.'

'Of course I will Sophia, what do you want to do?'

'I want to play on the swings again.'

'Come on then my little princess.' Jeff took Sophia over to the swings and sat her on them. 'Hold on tight.'

'I will daddy.' Jeff waited until Sophia had a proper hold on the swing and then pushed her. 'Come on daddy, I want to go really high.' Jeff smiled at his daughter's enthusiasm and pushed her a bit harder so she went higher, he pushed her a few more times until she decided she wanted to do something else. 'I'm going on the slide next.' Jeff followed Sophia around the equipment in the playground, he was very happy that she wanted to spend time with him.

Dixie sat with John on the blanket. 'John, your dad tells me that you look after your sister.'

'I do, I'm her big brother.'

'He is very proud of you.'

'I know, I wish that we could see him more, Sophia used to cry because she couldn't see dad.'

'Does she still cry?'

'Not now, she knows that she will be able to see him.'

'Good. You do know that you can call us at any time to speak to your dad.'

'Yes, I do.'

'John, how do you feel about the new baby?'

'My dad seems happy about it, so does Sophia.'

'What about you?'

'My dad still loves us so I am happy.'

'Your dad will always love you John, he always carries a picture of you and Sophia around with him everywhere he goes. I would like it if you would look after the baby like you look after your sister. Can you do that?'

'I can, thank you Dixie, I'd really like to be a big brother to the baby.'

'Then it's settled. I know you will do a good job.'

'I will, you can count on me.' Dixie smiled, she hoped that she had set John's mind at rest a little bit more that he would not be set aside when the baby came along.

Jeff watched Sophia playing until she came and sat beside him. 'Can I have a hug daddy?'

'Of course you can my little princess.'

'I'm looking forward to the baby coming.'

'It is going to be a long time yet Sophia.'

'Are you going to tell mummy?'

'I will tell her when the time is right, can you keep it a secret until then?'

'Of course I can daddy.'

'You're a good girl.' Jeff felt Sophia snuggle close to him. 'A tired girl too if I'm not mistaken.'

'No I'm not.'

'You are, come on my little princess, I think it is time to go home.'

'Can we come back another day?'

'Yes, we can come back another day and play some more.'

'Promise?'

'I promise.' Jeff picked Sophia up and headed back to where Dixie and John were waiting for them.

Dixie looked at Jeff as he came back, he was carrying Sophia who looked to be asleep with her head on his shoulder. 'I take it we're going home.'

'We are,' he said quietly to avoid waking Sophia.

'Bless her, I think the fresh air and exercise has tired her out.'

'I know, let's get her back so she can sleep properly.' Dixie got up and they walked back to the car, she opened the door so Jeff could lie Sophia down on the back seat, John got in the other side and she quietly closed the doors. Dixie noticed that John put his hand in front of Sophia so that she wouldn't fall off the end of the seat while they were moving.

Jeff drove them back to the house and he picked Sophia up again once they had stopped. 'Come on my little princess, let's put you in bed.' Sophia hadn't woken at all during the journey so she really must be tired. Jeff opened the door to Sophia and John's room and he pulled back the covers with one hand, he put Sophia gently in the bed and kissed her on the forehead. 'Rest well my little princess.' Jeff turned to see Dixie stood in the doorway watching him. 'Is everything all right Dixie?'

'You are a very good dad Jeff, I can't wait for us to have our own child.'

'I know.' Jeff put his hand on Dixie's stomach. 'There's a little me or a little you in there.'

'Another you, how will the world cope?'

'Hey, cheeky woman.'

'You love me for it.'

'I do indeed.'

'You have wonderful kids Jeff, I love having them here.'

'So do I princess.' Jeff looked at the sleeping Sophia one last time and closed the door.

'We'll have to make sure the kids get in the bath later on, they've been running around all day and are likely to be filthy.'

'You are going to be a very good mother Dixie.'

'I hope so.'

'You will be, I know it.' Jeff leaned in and kissed Dixie, he loved this woman and wanted to make sure that she knew it.

Dixie went back downstairs with Jeff, she had really enjoyed herself today being at the park with the kids and Jeff. Never in her life would she have thought that marrying a man and looking after children would make her feel so complete. Jeff was one of a kind, nobody else could replace him, he had given her the greatest gift that anyone could, the chance to be a mother. She loved him, it still felt strange to say it from time to time but she knew that it was true. Dixie was looking forward to the day that they would hold their own child, that day would make everything worth it.


	13. Chapter Thirteen

**Author: Raven Shadowrose**

**Rating: M  
**

**Pairing: ?/?**

**Summary: Sequel to Epiphany, Jeff and Dixie are trying to have a baby, what happens when it is likely to be more difficult than they first thought?**

**Disclaimer: I do not know or own any of the characters from Casualty, any original characters and the story are my property and I do not give permission for either of them to be used.**

**A/N: This is a direct sequel to Epiphany, please read that first to understand this story :) Reviews are welcome :)**

******************************Thank you to BeethovenRIP and chan. nelson4444 for your reviews and support, I hope you enjoy this chapter :) **

* * *

**Chapter Thirteen.**

Sophia woke up about an hour after Jeff had put her to bed, they'd had some tea and played a couple of games of hide and seek. Dixie ran Sophia a bath and went to get her. 'Sophia, are you ready?'

'Yes, I'm ready.' Dixie put Sophia's pyjamas and a towel on the radiator for her and helped her climb into the bath.

'Is the water warm enough for you?'

'Yes it is, it feels nice, I love it. Thank you Dixie.'

'You're welcome sweet pea.' Dixie sat with Sophia as she washed herself. 'Did you have fun at the park today?'

'I did, I liked playing on the swings the best, it was a lot of fun.'

'Good, we'll go swimming in a couple of days. Can you swim?'

'Yes, we had lessons at school. I didn't like the instructor, she wouldn't let us play.'

'That wasn't very nice of her.'

'It's okay, another lady started soon and she put hoops in the pool that we had to swim through, she taught us to dive too.'

'You'll have to show me your diving when we're at the pool.'

'I will, I want you and my daddy to watch me.'

'We will both watch you, your daddy will want to see how well you're doing at swimming. You're his little princess Sophia'

'I like being his little princess.'

'You will always be his little princess Sophia, no matter how old you get.'

'Will you wash my hair for me Dixie?'

'Of course I will.' Dixie picked up the shampoo bottle and squeezed some into her hand, she lathered up Sophia's hair, being careful not to get any of the soap in her eyes.

'I like you washing my hair Dixie.'

'Close your eyes Sophia, we wouldn't to get any of the soap in them.' Dixie waited until Sophia closed her eyes and then rinsed the shampoo off her hair with the shower. 'All done sweet pea, come on, it is time for you to get out.' Dixie let Sophia hold her hand as she got out of the bath, she wrapped the towel around her and helped her dry off. Dixie helped Sophia into her pyjamas and then used the towel to wrap up Sophia's hair. 'Come on lovely, let's go and see your dad.' Sophia took hold of Dixie's hand and they went downstairs.

Jeff smiled at Dixie and Sophia when they came into the lounge, Sophia was wearing her pyjamas and dressing gown with her hair wrapped up in a towel, she looked very cuddly and warm.

'Come on John,' Dixie said. 'It is time for your bath.'

'All right, I'm coming.' Jeff watched John go with Dixie, he knew that she was enjoying looking after the kids. He was so pleased that the kids loved Dixie as much as he did.

'Daddy, can I sit on your knee?'

'Of course you can, my little princess.' Jeff picked Sophia up and sat her on his knee.

'Dixie washed my hair for me, it smells of mango now.'

'Does it?'

'Yes, it smells lovely.' Jeff hugged Sophia close to him, he loved her dearly and he took comfort from the contact he had with his daughter. 'Daddy, will you dry my hair?'

'Anything for my little princess.' Jeff carefully unwound the towel from Sophia's head and gently dried her hair. 'Your hair has grown so much, I remember when you used to have it short.'

'Mummy used to tell me I had to have it short. I told her that I want it long now, it is my hair.' Jeff chuckled, Sophia was rapidly growing into her own person and he could see that she had quite clearly inherited his stubborn steak.

'It suits you, you look so pretty.'

'Yay, thank you daddy.'

'You're very welcome my little princess.'

'Is Dixie your princess too?'

'She is.'

'How did you decide you wanted to marry Dixie daddy?' Jeff hadn't anticipated the question and he didn't want to tell her that when he had married Dixie it had all been a sham.

'Dixie's daddy was very ill and he wanted to make sure that Dixie was going to be looked after when he was no longer here. I loved Dixie very much so to make Dixie and her dad happy I married her. I promised Dixie's daddy that I would look after her and protect her.'

'Did Dixie's daddy die?'

'Unfortunately he did, he was too ill.'

'Poor Dixie, I will give her an extra big cuddle when she comes downstairs.'

'That's my girl.' Jeff wondered where all Sophia's questions were coming from, he hoped that telling Sophia the truth about Dixie's dad hadn't scared her. He didn't think that lying to her was a good idea, honesty was the best policy where death was concerned.

Jeff carefully brushed Sophia's hair, she seemed to have taken the conversation about death quite well. 'Do you know what I see for you in the future my little princess?'

'No, what do you see daddy?'

'I see you marrying the person that you love, he takes good care of you, and you'll have lots of babies that I can be a granddad to.'

'Daddy, when you get old will you lose all of your hair and teeth?'

'What makes you think that happens?'

'Millie from school says that all daddies go bald and lose their teeth when they get older.'

'Not all of them, I plan to keep my teeth until I'm a hundred years old.'

'That's good, you would have to eat soup all the time if you lost your teeth daddy.' Jeff laughed, it amused him that she had thought so much about him losing his teeth and hair when he got older.

Dixie brought John back down after his bath, they'd had a long chat about school and his favourite subjects, he was a clever boy and she knew that he would go far one day. She looked at Sophia snuggled up to Jeff and smiled, it was lovely to see them so close, John sat on the sofa next to them and then Sophia got down and went over to Dixie. 'Hello sweet pea, is your hair all dry?'

'It is, daddy dried it for me.'

'Good.' Dixie felt Sophia put her arms around her waist and hug her tight. 'Sophia?'

'I just want to give you and my baby brother or sister a big cuddle.'

'Thank you lovely.' Dixie hugged Sophia back and then let her go back to Jeff, she wondered what had happened to make Sophia want to give her that hug.

Dixie sat on the smaller sofa and John joined her while Jeff cuddled Sophia. 'I think it is time for a story,' Jeff said. 'Are you sitting comfortably?' Dixie smiled, she wondered what Jeff was up to. 'Once upon a time, in a land far, far away, there was a beautiful princess called Sophia and her brother Prince John. The prince and princess lived in a castle with Queen Dixie and King Jeff, the king and queen ruled over their land fairly and all their loyal subjects loved them. The people were overjoyed when the prince and princess were born and everybody celebrated for days.' Dixie looked at Sophia and John, they seemed to be enjoying the story. 'The prince and princess were well looked after, they learned their lessons and became very clever. Sophia had the loveliest singing voice that anyone had ever heard and John was the bravest knight in all the kingdom, he protected the people with his loyal soldiers The brave Prince John slayed the dragon that was threatening all of the people.' Dixie wondered where Jeff got his imagination from.

Jeff felt Sophia snuggle up to him. 'What happened next daddy?'

'One sunny day, the handsome prince from the neighbouring kingdom came to ask for the hand of the fair Sophia. King Jeff arranged a meeting of the Princess Sophia and Prince Fletch and they instantly fell in love and the king made it known that they would be getting married. The people celebrated as they had all been invited to the wedding.' Jeff was using people that he knew in this story, Sophia and John seemed to be really enjoying it. 'The day of the wedding came and all of the kingdom had turned out to see their beloved princess marry the prince that she loved. All went well, the king and queen were so happy for Sophia, she was now married to the man that she loved.'

'Keep going daddy.'

'Prince Fletch took Sophia away on his horse to meet Queen Tess and King Charlie, both families met up for tea every weekend and were overjoyed to hear that Princess Sophia was with child. Prince John vowed that he would protect his sister, his dad was so proud of the young prince for the way he took care of his sister and the people.' Jeff saw John smile, he was pleased that his son knew just how proud of him he was. 'Soon Princess Sophia gave birth to a baby girl and the whole kingdom celebrated, she was very beautiful, just like her mum. Prince John doted on the little girl and at the party for her birth he met his future wife, the Princess Samantha, they too got married and Prince John was blessed with a little boy that was as brave and loving as his father. King Jeff and Queen Dixie were so happy, their family had grown and the prince and princess were happy with the people that they loved. And they all lived happily ever after.' Jeff kissed Sophia on the head and hugged her close.

'I liked that story daddy.'

'Good, I am glad you did.' Jeff had quite enjoyed telling that story to his kids, it made him feel like a proper father to them.

Dixie sat on the sofa and waited for Jeff to come back from putting the kids to bed, she thought that he should have some time with them before they went to bed. Today had been good fun for them all and she had managed to take some pictures of them all too, she was hoping to get one that Jeff could put in his wallet to replace the one that he had in there, he deserved to have a more recent picture of them. Dixie cuddled up to Jeff when he came back down. 'Are the kids asleep?'

'Yeah, they've had a busy day.'

'Indeed they have, so have we.'

'Do you think they liked the story?'

'They were hooked, where do you get your imagination from Jeff?'

'I think it is a natural talent Dix.' Dixie rested her head on Jeff's shoulder.

'How does the story end for us Jeff?'

'Simple, you give birth and we have a healthy baby. He or she will have a mummy, a daddy, a big brother and sister that dotes on him or her. They will grow up loved and cared for every day of their life.'

'It sounds like the perfect happy ending to me Mr Collier.'

'Me too Mrs Collier.' Dixie smiled, she really liked the sound of the happy ending that Jeff had suggested.

Jeff put his hand on Dixie's belly. 'When we go back to work you will be careful, won't you?'

'Of course I will.'

'I don't want you or the baby to get hurt, we do a very risky job Dixie. I would feel better if you went to ambulance dispatch sooner.'

'Jeff, you can't take away every risk in the world. I promise you that I will be careful out there, you will be nearby and I know that you will protect us if we need it.'

'I will, you know that I would lay down my life for you both.'

'It won't come to that, this baby needs his or her daddy. We'll protect each other Jeff.'

'Okay, I love you Dixie.'

'I love you too Jeff.' Jeff was relieved that Dixie would be careful but he vowed to be near her and protect her and the baby always.


	14. Chapter Fourteen

**Author: Raven Shadowrose**

**Rating: M  
**

**Pairing: ?/?**

**Summary: Sequel to Epiphany, Jeff and Dixie are trying to have a baby, what happens when it is likely to be more difficult than they first thought?**

**Disclaimer: I do not know or own any of the characters from Casualty, any original characters and the story are my property and I do not give permission for either of them to be used.**

**A/N: This is a direct sequel to Epiphany, please read that first to understand this story :) Reviews are welcome :)**

******************************Thank you to BeethovenRIP and chan. nelson4444 for your reviews and support, swimming time ladies, get your costumes :) **

* * *

**Chapter Fourteen.**

Dixie put her and Sophia's things into the locker and locked it, she attached the key to her wrist. 'Come on then sweet pea, let's go swimming.'

'Yay, I can't wait.' Dixie felt Sophia's hand slip into hers and they walked together to the pool. 'Can we wait until daddy comes out so I can show you both my diving?'

'Of course we can, we'll get in and then when your daddy comes in you can show us what you can do.'

'Yay, thank you Dixie.'

'You're welcome lovely.' Dixie climbed in to the water, it was a bit cold but she would get used to the temperature soon, she smiled as Sophia jumped straight into the deep end and swam over to her.

'I like swimming Dixie, do you like my costume?'

'I do, it suits you.'

'I said that I wanted the blue one, mummy said I should get the pink one but I don't like pink.'

'I don't like pink either Sophia, the blue one is a much better choice.'

'Yay, I am glad you think so. There's daddy.' Sophia waved at Jeff and John and they came over to them. 'What took you so long daddy, we've been waiting for you.'

'Sorry my little princess, we're here now.' Dixie laughed as Jeff slowly lowered himself into the water.

'Is the water cold Mr Collier?'

'Just a bit.'

'You wuss, it is lovely.'

'I'll give you lovely Mrs Collier.' Dixie turned her back as Jeff splashed her with a load of water.

'I am so going to get you for that Jeffrey, you're in so much trouble.' Dixie laughed as Jeff suddenly found himself covered with a lot of water from behind him. She looked at Sophia and John who were giggling away to themselves at what they had just done to their dad, he wiped his eyes and then splashed them back. Dixie was delighted that they were having such a good time having a water fight, Jeff was such a big kid when it came to playing.

Jeff was so pleased that John and Sophia were having a good time while they were swimming. 'Daddy, can I show you my diving now?'

'Of course you can my little princess.' Jeff watched Sophia climb out and execute a perfect dive into the pool, he was so proud of her, she swam over to him and held onto the wall.

'What did you think daddy?'

'You're very good, I think we'll see you in the Olympics when you're older.'

'Do you think so?'

'I do indeed.'

'Yay, thank you daddy.' He smiled, he loved Sophia's enthusiasm, he was glad that she had grown up to be such a talented little girl. 'Come on John, race with me. Daddy, will you and Dixie tell us who wins?'

'Of course we will my little princess.'

'Okay, you set us off and when we get back to this end you can tell us who won.'

'Ready, set, go.' Jeff watched as Sophia and John started to race down to the end of the pool.

Dixie loved watching Sophia and John, they were full of life and it made her smile. 'Jeff, you have wonderful kids, I know I've said it before but I believe it needs saying again.'

'I know, I am so proud of them.'

'I can see that, it is in your eyes every time you look at them.'

'I love them so much.'

'I can see that too.'

'You're looking much better today Dixie, your colour has come back.'

'I feel much better, it appears my tablets are working.'

'I am glad to hear it, I don't like you being unwell princess.'

'I know, you're a lovely man Jeff.' Dixie leaned in and kissed Jeff, he really was a lovely man, she loved him a lot.

Jeff felt a lot of water fall over his head, he pulled away from Dixie and saw John and Sophia laughing at them. 'Daddy, you were supposed to tell us who won the race and yet you were kissing Dixie.'

'Sorry my little princess.'

'You can just buy me chocolate to make up for it.'

'She's got you there Jeffrey.'

'Dixie, have you been teaching Sophia your tricks?'

'Maybe a little bit, though I have a feeling this is her doing.'

'Yeah right, you ask me to buy chocolate when you think I've done something wrong.'

'No daddy, Dixie didn't teach me that.'

'What did she teach you?'

'Nothing.' Jeff laughed, he knew that Dixie had been teaching Sophia some things, he supposed there were worse people for Sophia to learn from. It would mean that he was in for some inventive punishments from his daughter.

Dixie watched the kids race a few more times, they were very well matched in their speed and it was hard to tell who was winning each race. 'You're both excellent at swimming, I think you both deserve pizza after this.'

'Yay, thank you Dixie.' Dixie smiled at Sophia and put her arm around the little girl. 'I like going swimming with you and daddy.'

'We like going swimming with you too.'

'I like swimming,' John said.

'Do you like pizza too John.'

'I do, I like spicy chicken best.'

'Then that is what you will have. We might even have ice cream too.' Dixie smiled at the expression on the faces of the kids, they looked really happy at the prospect of ice cream.

Jeff and Dixie took the kids to get changed and dried off and they all met outside the baths. 'Is everyone ready for pizza?' Jeff covered his ears as the kids cheered. 'You are excitable today.'

'We just want pizza daddy.'

'Then pizza you shall have my little princess.' Jeff opened the door to the pizza shop and the woman showed them to a table. 'Come on kids, sit down.' Jeff let Dixie herd the kids into seats and he went to the bar to get them all something to drink, he put the glasses down on the table. He'd bought them all coke as he was still avoiding drinking to support Dixie while she was pregnant. 'What do you want kids?'

'Spicy chicken,' John clearly hadn't changed his mind since the baths.

'Cheese and tomato.' Sophia had loved cheese and tomato since she was a little girl. Jeff put the order for the pizza that they wanted and watched Sophia and John drink their drinks. He'd ordered pepperoni for himself and Dixie, they always had pepperoni, it was their favourite.

Dixie ate her pizza, she loved pizza, it was nice to have time out with the kids and Jeff. She was amazed at the kids table manners, for kids so young their manners were impeccable. 'Hey kids, Tamzin is coming over for tea tomorrow, do you remember her?'

'Yes,' Sophia said. 'She has pretty hair and eyes, she made mummy send us here for the big party at your house.'

'That's her.'

'I like Tamzin, she's lovely, I can't wait to see her again. Is she still with the man from the party?'

'Tom, yes, she's still with him, he loves her and she loves him.'

'Awww, yay, it is so romantic.' Dixie smiled at Sophia, she was so happy and full of life, she really hoped that she kept those qualities as she got older. 'Is Tom coming with her?'

'No, Tom has to work, he's being a doctor tomorrow.'

'That's very important, he has to look after the ill people.'

'Yes, he does.' Dixie loved that Sophia understood the importance of doctors and their jobs.

Jeff took John and Sophia to get some ice cream, he saw their eyes widen as they saw the massive choice of ice cream that they had. 'Come on then kids, pick what you want.' He helped them put their ice cream and toppings into a bowl and then sent them back to the table. Jeff put Dixie's favourite into a bowl; chocolate ice cream with smarties and fudge syrup, she always had the same no matter what. His own favourite was much more complicated; chocolate and strawberry ice cream with chocolate buttons, golden syrup and then vanilla ice cream on top. He took both bowls back to the table and then put Dixie's in front of her. 'Thanks Jeff.'

'You're welcome princess.'

'How do you eat that?'

'It is gorgeous, you should try it sometime.'

'No thank you, I will stick to my favourite.'

'Each to their own princess.' Jeff tucked into his ice cream, Dixie really didn't know what she was missing out on.

Dixie helped the kids put their coats on and took them outside while Jeff paid the bill, she had really enjoyed herself today. 'John, did you have fun?'

'Yes, thank you Dixie.'

'You're welcome.' Dixie had come to realise that John was quite shy and quiet compared to his sister who was louder and more forthcoming, she made a mental note to include him in the conversation more and ask him questions. 'Are you enjoying seeing your dad?'

'Yes, it is fun, I am having a good time.'

'Good, we are really glad to have you here with us.' John smiled at her and Dixie smiled back, he was a lovely boy and looked a lot like Jeff when he smiled.

Jeff followed Dixie out of the shop. 'Are you ready to go home kids?'

'What will we do there daddy?'

'I'm going to play football with John in the garden for a little while.' Jeff noted that John looked happy with this.

'Just watch those windows Jeffrey Collier.'

'Yes, my lovely wife.'

'Dixie is going to teach me to knit daddy.'

'Is she?'

'Yes, I want to make little clothes for the baby.'

'Good, that will be lovely my little princess.'

'I will have lots and lots made by the time the baby is here.'

'Come on then, let's go home.' Jeff took hold Sophia's hand and together they walked back through the streets to the car. He looked at Dixie walking and talking with John, his son was very shy but he seemed to get on well with Dixie and talked to her a lot. He was very pleased that John seemed to be coming out of his shell with Dixie and he hoped in time that it would happen with everyone else around him too.


	15. Chapter Fifteen

**Author: Raven Shadowrose**

**Rating: M  
**

**Pairing: ?/?**

**Summary: Sequel to Epiphany, Jeff and Dixie are trying to have a baby, what happens when it is likely to be more difficult than they first thought?**

**Disclaimer: I do not know or own any of the characters from Casualty, any original characters and the story are my property and I do not give permission for either of them to be used.**

**A/N: This is a direct sequel to Epiphany, please read that first to understand this story :) Reviews are welcome :)**

******************************Thank you to BeethovenRIP and chan. nelson4444 for your reviews and continued support, enjoy :) **

* * *

**Chapter Fifteen.**

Dixie opened the door to Tamzin, she was right on time. 'Come on in Tamzin.'

'Thanks Dixie, something smells nice.'

'That will be the lasagne and garlic bread, it is near enough done.'

'Sounds lovely.'

'How is Tom?'

'He's good, he's quite jealous that I'm coming here tonight.'

'I'll save him some of the food and you can take it with you.'

'Thanks Dixie.'

'Take a seat.' Tamzin sat down at the table.

'How's things here?'

'Good, the kids and Jeff are having a good time. I love having them here.'

'Where are they?'

'They're upstairs, Sophia wanted her hair straightened by her daddy.'

'How are you feeling Dixie?'

'Much better, the tablets are working.'

'I'm glad to hear that.'

'I'm almost my normal self again, I have a few more days left on the tablets and then all my symptoms should be gone completely.'

'Good. How is the little one?'

'Nice and cushy I think.' Tamzin smiled. 'Though you won't see anything for another seven weeks at least.'

'I know, it will be exciting to go through this with you and Jeff.'

'I just hope I'm not going to suffer too much with morning sickness and so on.'

'I'll help you and I'm sure that Jeff will help you too.'

'Thank you Tamzin. I am sure that he will, he'll probably be very protective of me.'

'Yes, I am sure that he will be, it is sweet.' Dixie got up and looked in the oven, she put on the oven gloves and took out the container full of lasagne, the cheese was bubbling and it smelled wonderful. She started to put the salad and garlic bread on the table ready for Jeff and the kids when they came down.

Jeff stood behind Sophia, he was using Dixie's straighteners to straighten Sophia's hair, she had decided that she wanted to be like Dixie and that started with straightening her hair. John was sat watching, he knew that this was Dixie's attempt at giving them some time together. Jeff tried to push aside the feelings of sadness that he would have to let the kids go home in a week. It was getting harder to let them go home, he tried to stay strong for Sophia as it was hardest on her when she had to leave. If she saw that he was upset then it would only upset her more. 'You look very pretty my little princess.'

'Do you think so daddy?'

'I do.' Jeff carefully unplugged the straighteners and left them to cool down, Dixie would murder him if he let the straighteners set fire to anything. 'What do you think of your sister's hair John?'

'She looks lovely.'

'Thank you John.' Sophia hugged her brother and then Jeff. 'Daddy, do we have to go home?'

'Not yet.'

'What if I don't want to go home?'

'Sophia, you have to go home to your mum, your school is there.'

'But I miss you when I go home daddy.'

'I miss you too but you know that you can call me whenever you need to talk to me.'

'I know, I wish we could visit more daddy, I like coming here.'

'We like you coming here too.'

'One day, when I'm bigger, I'm going to come and live near here and then I can see you every day.'

'I'd like that. What about John?'

'He can come and live with me too.'

'Would you like that John?'

'Yes, I'd like that very much.' Jeff smiled, he was glad that his kids still loved him but he felt guilty that they had to spend their time split between two homes. Maybe he had been a better husband to Lucy then this wouldn't have happened. He knew that not all of the blame rested with himself, she was as much to blame for it all ending. Maybe if they had both been better people then it wouldn't have ended up this way.

Dixie called upstairs to Jeff and the kids, everything was ready for them to come and eat, she soon heard the kids run down the stairs and into the kitchen. 'Wash your hands please.' The kids ran to the sink and did as Dixie asked them. Jeff came into the kitchen as the kids sat down.

'Hi Tamzin.'

'All right Jeff.'

'Jeffrey, was your hands please.'

'What?'

'Pardon, honestly, how are Sophia and John meant to learn any manners when you go around saying what all the time.'

'Pardon, my lovely wife, what was your request?'

'Wash your hands before you eat.' Dixie looked pointedly at the sink and Jeff washed his hands, she ignored the obvious sarcasm in Jeff's comment and busied herself with putting the lasagne and salad onto the plates for everyone. Once Jeff had sat down at the table Dixie sat in her own place. She noticed that the kids were giggling and laughing at their dad. 'Okay everyone, eat up.' Dixie smiled as the kids tucked into their food, it pleased her to see that they ate their salad too.

Tamzin watched Dixie take control of the kids and Jeff in one fell swoop, she would make a wonderful mother when the time came. She ate her lasagne, it was wonderful, Dixie was an amazing cook, that little baby in Dixie's belly was very lucky to have a mother like Dixie and a dad like Jeff. 'Thank you Dixie, this is lovely, you'll have to give me your recipe for it.'

'I will do, I am glad that you like it.' Tamzin ate the last of her lasagne and salad and pushed her plate to one side. 'I think it is time for dessert.' Tamzin watched Jeff rub his hands together.

'Good, I like dessert.'

'Not for you Jeffrey.'

'What, why not?'

'Pardon, Jeffrey, you haven't eaten your salad.'

'Come on Dixie, please.'

'No, finish your salad and then you can have cake.' Tamzin laughed, Sophia and John were thoroughly enjoying seeing their dad get told off for not eating his salad. She laughed again as Jeff pulled a face as he started eating his salad.

Jeff glared at Dixie for making him finish his salad. 'Daddy, you should listen to Dixie, salad makes you big and strong.'

'Yes, it does princess, but daddy is already big and strong.'

'I eat my salad so I can have cake, maybe you should do the same.' He couldn't argue with Sophia's logic, he quickly finished his salad and put his plate with the others on the side of the sink. 'Happy now Dixie?'

'Much better, now you can have cake.'

'Thank you my love.' Jeff kissed Dixie on the cheek and helped her put the cake in the bowls and our the custard on top. 'I love Bakewell tart, it is my favourite.' Jeff went to sit down with the cake but Dixie stopped him.

'Give that piece to Tamzin, she is the guest so she gets the first piece.' Jeff scowled at Dixie and handed the bowl to Tamzin.

'Thank you Jeff.'

'You're welcome.' Jeff watched Dixie hand round the other bowls of cake to Sophia and John and then she gave him his. 'Thank you Dixie.' Dixie smiled.

'I'll teach you manners yet Jeff.' Jeff just laughed he could see the funny side of Dixie's mothering.

Tamzin sat with the kids in the lounge, they were sat watching Shrek on DVD while Dixie and Jeff washed up. She had offered to help but Dixie wouldn't let her, she looked at the kids sat together on the sofa and smiled, for a brother and sister they got on so well. 'Tamzin, do you like Shrek?' Tamzin looked at Sophia, she'd been so lost in her own thoughts that she hadn't noticed the young girl get up.

'I do.'

'Who is your favourite character?'

'Princess Fiona, I like when she becomes an ogre for good. It is so romantic.'

'It is. Do you think you will marry Tom one day Tamzin?'

'I would like to marry him one day when we're ready.'

'When do you think you will be ready?'

'I do not know right now, but I think that we will know when we are ready for that step.'

'Can I come when you do get married?'

'Of course you can, both you and your brother are very welcome.'

'Yay, thank you.' Tamzin smiled at Sophia, she was so sweet. 'I like you Tamzin.'

'I like you too.'

'You made mummy let us see daddy again.'

'Not really.'

'You did, for the party to celebrate daddy and Dixie's wedding, then daddy told her he wanted to see us and she had to let him.'

'I know, your daddy is very happy to have you here.'

'I like being here. Tamzin, do you think my daddy looks like Shrek?' Tamzin giggled.

'How do you think your daddy looks like Shrek?'

'He's bald like Shrek.' Tamzin laughed and Sophia giggled.

'Don't tell your daddy that.'

'I won't. I think Dixie is like Fiona, she's pretty and kind.'

'That she is, she also has quite the feisty temper like Fiona too.'

'She does, she tells daddy off a lot but I know that she loves him.'

'Of course she does, Dixie loves your daddy very much, she loves you two as well.'

'I know, she looks after us and makes us nice food.' Tamzin smiled, Sophia was very sweet and she loved her dad and Dixie a lot.

Dixie went into the lounge to find Tamzin sat in the middle of Sophia and John, they were both cuddled up to her as they watched Shrek. Dixie smiled at the scene in front of her, they'd had a good day and this was a good end to it. 'I see you're occupied Tamzin.'

'Yes, a little bit, I don't mind though.'

'Dixie,' Sophia said from her spot next to Tamzin. 'My daddy is Shrek and you're Fiona.'

'Am I now?'

'Yes, because you're pretty like her.' Dixie felt her heart warm at Sophia's words and she smiled.

'Thank you, you're very pretty too, I like your hair.'

'Do you? Can I have it like this again?'

'Of course you can.'

'Yay, I'm going to tell daddy.' Sophia jumped up off the sofa and ran into the kitchen.

'Dixie, Tom is on his way to pick me up.'

'Oh good, I don't want you going home alone in the dark.'

'It has been very enjoyable, thank you for inviting me.'

'It is my pleasure, consider it a thank you for everything that you're doing at the station.'

'I don't mind, I am just glad that you're okay and that you're having a good time.'

'We are, I can relax more knowing that the station is in capable hands.'

'Don't worry, I won't let anything happen to it.'

'I know.' Dixie turned at the sound of the doorbell. 'Looks like your lift is here Tamzin.'

'It does, doesn't it?' Tamzin turned to John. 'Goodbye John, it has been nice seeing you again.'

'Goodbye Tamzin.' Dixie smiled as John hugged Tamzin and then waved at her, he clearly liked Tamzin.

Tamzin went to the door with Dixie, she found Jeff and Sophia waiting for her. Sophia threw her arms around Tamzin. 'Goodbye Tamzin, will you come and see us again before we go home?'

'Of course I will.'

'Yay, thank you.' Tamzin hugged Sophia.

'You're welcome.' She hugged Dixie and then Jeff. 'I'll see you soon.'

'Take care Tamzin,' Dixie said as she hugged her.

'I will, you take care too, thank you for the food.' Tamzin picked up the boxes with some of the lasagne and the cake in.

'You're welcome. You take care of her too.' Tamzin chuckled as Dixie pointed at Tom.

'I will.' Tamzin knew very well that Tom wouldn't dare invoke Dixie's wrath, nearly everyone had seen Dixie in one of her moods and most of them didn't care to see it again, except Jeff, he never seemed to learn not to open his mouth and always ended up annoying Dixie. Tamzin waved one last time as she got into the car, she had enjoyed herself this evening, it had been good fun and a great way of unwinding after her shift. She settled down in her seat, she was looking forward to spending some time with Tom before they had to go to bed for their shifts tomorrow.


	16. Chapter Sixteen

**Author: Raven Shadowrose**

**Rating: M  
**

**Pairing: ?/?**

**Summary: Sequel to Epiphany, Jeff and Dixie are trying to have a baby, what happens when it is likely to be more difficult than they first thought?**

**Disclaimer: I do not know or own any of the characters from Casualty, any original characters and the story are my property and I do not give permission for either of them to be used.**

**A/N: This is a direct sequel to Epiphany, please read that first to understand this story :) Reviews are welcome :)**

******************************Thank you to BeethovenRIP and chan. nelson4444 for your reviews, you're lovely people. Enjoy the chapter. **

******************************Please note there is some adult content in this chapter, I take no responsibility for you not liking what you read if you continue, you have been warned.  
**

* * *

**Chapter Sixteen.**

Dixie made sure that the kids had everything packed to go home, she didn't want them to go but she had to send them home. Jeff was already feeling sad, she could see it in his eyes, it got harder for him to let them go every time that they came to stay. She wished that she could make it so that there was a more permanent solution to the problem. It hurt Jeff and the kids every time that they were torn apart from each other, Dixie didn't know what to do about it, perhaps a solution would present itself to her in time.

Jeff sat with John and Sophia in the lounge, the time to take them to meet Lucy was getting too close for his liking. 'Kids, you know that I love you don't you?'

'Yes daddy,' Sophia said.

'Yes dad.' John was quiet, he was always thinking. Jeff wished that he knew what his son was thinking of. 'I want you to always remember that, no matter what happens.' John and Sophia both nodded, he was afraid that Lucy would try to convince them that he didn't care for them. He was going to tell her today that Dixie was pregnant, he couldn't put it off any longer. Jeff didn't know how Lucy was going to react; whether she would be angry or whether she simply wouldn't care. The worst thing that could happen would be that she would never let him see the kids again, as long as that didn't happen then he could cope with anything else.

'Come here kids.' Jeff hugged Sophia and John tightly, he didn't want to let them go home.

Dixie noted that Jeff was very quiet throughout the drive to meet Lucy, she was worried about him, he always struggled to get back to being himself after giving John and Sophia back. She'd gone with him this time as she wanted to support him, she hoped that with someone there it might be a little bit easier. The kids were quiet in the back too, Dixie felt sorry for them, Sophia was definitely her daddy's girl and she hated going home. Sophia had asked more than once if she could stay, it hurt to have to tell her that she couldn't stay. Tamzin had told Dixie that Sophia had said to her that she wished she could stay with Jeff permanently. It almost broke Dixie's heart to hear that. How long would it be before Sophia told Lucy? Dixie thought that Lucy wouldn't be too pleased if Sophia told her that.

Jeff parked the car and took the kids cases out of the boot, Lucy was already waiting for them, he put the cases into Lucy's boot and then stood back. 'Jeff.'

'Lucy, we have something to discuss.'

'I can't imagine there is anything to talk about.'

'Dixie's pregnant, I've already told the kids.'

'Oh, a mistake was it?'

'No, the baby is quite planned.'

'So, why are you telling me?'

'I thought you might want to know.'

'Why should I care, you don't mean anything to me Jeff. I put up with seeing you because the kids want to see you.' Jeff tried to hide his hurt, he didn't want to give Lucy the satisfaction of knowing that she had got to him.

'I don't care for you either Lucy, the only people I care about are stood over there.' Jeff pointed in the direction of Dixie and the kids.

'Just give me the kids and then I can get out of here.'

'Fine.' Jeff went over to the kids. 'Okay kids, it is time to go.'

'Daddy, do we have to?'

'Yes, Sophia. I'm sorry my little princess but you do have to.'

'I want to stay with you and Dixie, daddy.' Jeff tried to hide the tears that were gathering in his eyes, Sophia and John were upset enough and he didn't want to make them worse.

Dixie saw that Jeff was getting upset, he was hugging John and Sophia tightly, it upset her too but she was trying to keep it together for Jeff. Dixie hugged Sophia and John when they came over to her. 'I am going to miss you kids, promise me that you'll be good.'

'We will,' John and Sophia said together.

'Good, we will see you soon. Don't forget to call us. John, take care of your sister.'

'I will.'

'Very good.' Dixie hugged the kids again and then let them go to Lucy, she went to Jeff and put her arms around him. They waved at the kids as Lucy drove off. Dixie looked at Jeff, he looked so sad, she almost felt her heart break for him. 'Come here love.' Dixie pulled Jeff closer and held him tight, she really felt for him at this time.

Jeff just let Dixie hold him, letting the kids go had hurt him even more than Lucy's comments did. He had loved her once, it wasn't all bad at the beginning really, just at the end. What hurt him most was the comment about the baby he had made with Dixie. 'Come on love, let's go home.'

'I'm going to miss them Dixie.'

'I know, I see it every time you have to let them go.'

'It is not fair on them Dix.'

'You can't stop seeing them Jeff, they've only just got their dad back.'

'I know, it would be selfish of me.'

'Give me the keys Jeff, you're not in the best position to drive right now.' Jeff got into the car, he didn't feel like driving so he gave the keys to Dixie, he just wanted to think over the memories of the time he had spent with John and Sophia.

Dixie took Jeff home and let them into the house, Little Abs ran up to them immediately. 'Hello mate.' He looked for the kids and he almost looked sad that they were no longer there. Dixie watched Jeff take his shoes off and go into the lounge. She followed him in and sat next to him. 'Jeff, talk to me.'

'I'm fine.'

'No, you're not, it's okay to miss them.' Dixie picked up something she had got for Jeff before the kids had left. 'Here, open it.'

'What is it?'

'You'll see, just open it.' Jeff opened the little package and Dixie saw him look at the little picture.

'When did you get this done?'

'On the last day, now you have another picture for your wallet.'

'Dixie, thank you.'

'You're welcome. Come here love.' Dixie took Jeff into her arms and hugged him. 'I love you Jeff.'

'I love you too Dixie. I told Lucy about the baby.'

'What did she say?'

'She said she didn't care, that I don't mean anything to her. She asked if the baby was a mistake.' Dixie was angry, Lucy had hurt Jeff with her comments.

'Forget her, we both know that our baby is no mistake. Our baby is the result of the love we share for each other. Jeff, I care for you, you mean everything to me and she's a horrible woman. Please forget what she said.'

'I'll try.'

'Good. Your kids love you too Jeff, that is all that matters.' Dixie held Jeff tight, she wanted to make him feel better.

Jeff took comfort from the warmth of Dixie's body and her words, he knew that she meant it. 'Dixie, thank you for the picture.'

'You're welcome love.' He looked at the picture again, it was of himself, Dixie and the kids when they had gone out to the park for the second time. They had put the camera on timer and then stood together for the photo. Sophia and John looked so happy, he noticed that Dixie was looking up at him and she was smiling. It was a brilliant picture. He tucked the picture into his wallet and closed it. 'Come on love.'

'Where are we going?'

'We're having an early night.'

'Dixie, I'm not sure that we should.'

'Why not?'

'It might hurt the baby.'

'Trust me Jeff, it won't hurt the baby.'

'Are you sure?'

'Yes, don't worry love, nothing will happen to the baby.'

'Okay, I have a condition though.'

'What is it?'

'That you go on top, I just want to make sure you and the baby are safe.'

'All right, if it will make you feel better.' Jeff was feeling very protective of Dixie and their baby, he didn't want anything to happen to either of them. Lucy had taken his kids just like that, he was afraid that someone would take Dixie and the baby away from him too.

Dixie sat Jeff down on the bed and kissed him, she loved him and wanted to help him feel better. She lay back on the bed and beckoned to Jeff, she smiled at him as he lay down beside her. 'Are you feeling any better?'

A little bit, I just miss them Dixie.'

'I know, I miss them too.'

'I wish they could be here with me, sending them back to Lucy nearly kills me every time.'

'Yes, I know it does. Come here love.' Dixie held Jeff in her arms, she was trying her best to comfort him. She felt Jeff bury his head in her shoulder and she just kept him close to her in the hope that it would help him feel better.

Jeff just lay in Dixie's arms. 'Dixie?'

'Yes love.'

'Am I a good dad?'

'You know that you are.'

'I'm not so sure sometimes, maybe I should have stayed away, then they wouldn't be going through this.'

'Nonsense, your kids need their dad.'

'Do they?'

'Yes, listen to me Jeffrey Collier, your kids need you and they love you. I have seen it every time they come here, I don't want to hear you say that your kids would be better off without you because it is just not true.'

'Thanks Dixie, what would I do without you?'

'I don't know, you're never going to find out because I'm not going away.'

'I could always bump you off and claim the insurance.'

'That is nice, I'll come back to haunt you if you do that, every moment of every day.'

'Okay, I won't do it, for now anyway.' Jeff smiled, somehow Dixie always managed to cheer him up, he didn't know how she did it but she always managed to make him feel better.

Dixie saw Jeff smile and she knew he was feeling a bit better, it would take a couple of days for him to feel totally better but he was joking about and that was always a good sign where Jeff was concerned. Dixie leaned in and kissed Jeff, she wanted to feel him again, it had been too long since he had been inside her. She felt his hands run down her body and then one of them settled on her stomach, she looked at it and then at Jeff. 'Dixie, are you certain?'

'Yes, very, I want you Jeff.' Dixie lifted her arms as Jeff took her top off and threw it to one side.

'You will tell me if you need me to stop, won't you?'

'Yes, I will love.' She removed Jeff's shirt and let him take off her bra, they continued removing clothing until they were both naked on the bed. 'Jeff, it has been too long.' Dixie moaned as Jeff's fingers slipped inside her, he slowly moved them and Dixie shuddered as his thumb brushed against her clit. 'Like that Jeff, don't stop.' Dixie moved herself against Jeff's fingers, she loved that he could turn her to jelly with just a few strokes of his fingers.

Jeff watched Dixie's face as he pleasured her body, her moaning was rapidly turning him on and he felt himself getting harder. 'Touch me Dixie.' Jeff groaned as Dixie's hand wrapped around his length and she started stroking him and coaxing him to full hardness. 'Where did you get so good at this?'

'It is a secret.' Jeff groaned again, he wasn't sure he cared where Dixie got her talent from, not when she was touching him the way she was. 'Fuck, Dixie, I want to be inside you.' Jeff rolled onto his back. 'You promised, remember. You said you would go on top.'

'Jeff, you're not going to hurt me or the baby but I will humour you this time.' Jeff watched Dixie straddle his legs and then he guided himself inside her. He just wanted Dixie and the baby to be safe, he would hate it if something he did ended up hurting either of them.

Dixie slowly rocked her hips, she'd never done this before with Jeff and she wondered why. She could feel everything, Jeff was buried deep inside her body and it turned her on considerably. Dixie felt Jeff sit up and his arms go around her, holding her close. 'Wrap your legs around me Dixie.' She did as he asked and she felt Jeff's eyes lock onto hers, it was intense, she saw passion, heat and love in them. She moved herself up and down Jeff's length, their movement was limited but she felt closer to Jeff than ever before.

'Jeff, I can't wait.'

'Don't wait Dixie, let go.' Dixie moaned as she felt Jeff's lips on her neck, he was gently sucking on the one spot she found highly pleasurable and she cried out as her orgasm worked its way through her body, it was stronger than she'd ever felt it before.

Jeff heard Dixie moaning and felt her body spasm, he held onto her and rocked his own hips, he loved watching Dixie like this, she always closed her eyes when she came. He kissed her forehead as he moved inside her and groaned. 'I love you Dixie.'

'I love you Jeff.' Jeff buried his head in Dixie's shoulder as he came inside her. Jeff pulled Dixie close to him and held her. He slowly moved backwards until he was lying back against the pillow with Dixie snuggled against his chest. Jeff lay still and enjoyed the feeling of being connected with Dixie, he stroked her hair and gently kissed her head. 'Come on Dixie, get under the covers before you get cold.' Jeff supported Dixie as she moved to the side and he pulled the covers over them both, he pulled Dixie into his arms and stroked her back. He was still sad over the kids going back to their mum but he would talk to them tomorrow after he got home from work. Lucy would not stop him having contact with them.


	17. Chapter Seventeen

**Author: Raven Shadowrose**

**Rating: M  
**

**Pairing: ?/?**

**Summary: Sequel to Epiphany, Jeff and Dixie are trying to have a baby, what happens when it is likely to be more difficult than they first thought?**

**Disclaimer: I do not know or own any of the characters from Casualty, any original characters and the story are my property and I do not give permission for either of them to be used.**

**A/N: This is a direct sequel to Epiphany, please read that first to understand this story :) Reviews are welcome :)**

******************************Thank you to BeethovenRIP and chan. nelson4444 for your reviews, I hope you enjoy this chapter. **

* * *

**Chapter Seventeen.**

Dixie took over from Tamzin the minute she got back, the young woman had done an excellent job once again. It was nice to come back to a well organised office, she had to do some work on the rotas but it wasn't bothering her as it was a slow day and it was keeping her occupied. She looked up as Tamzin came in and handed her a cup of peppermint tea. 'Thanks Tamzin, just what I need, you're a lifesaver.'

'Is anything wrong?'

'I'm starting to feel a bit sick, it is all normal though. I had hoped I would avoid the morning sickness but it appears my body has other ideas.'

'Have you told Jeff?'

'No, he'll only fuss over me. He's been a bit protective lately, I think it is because the kids went home.'

'How is he dealing with it?'

'How he always does, he pretends he's fine but I know different.'

'It must be hard for him.'

'It is, I wish there was something I could do to make it so the kids didn't have to go home.'

'How are you feeling?'

'I miss them too, it is always so much quieter when they go home.'

'No wonder you're both so quiet.'

'We are?'

'Yes, usually you're always laughing and joking. If you want me to go and kidnap the kids in the ambulance and bring them back here just say so.' Dixie smiled, Tamzin was a sweet girl and she had become a brilliant paramedic, she had so much potential.

Jeff busied himself with checking the ambulance, he knew it was already fully stocked but he had to do something to stop himself from thinking about the kids and how much he missed them. He really wished that he could see them again, talking to the helped but it seemed too far away until their next visit. Jeff sat down on the back step of the ambulance and took out his wallet, he looked at the picture that Dixie had got for him. The picture reminded him that they'd had a good time together in the fortnight that had just passed. The only thing that was keeping him going throughout the day was the knowledge that he would be able to talk to John and Sophia when he got in from work, there wasn't long to go but every minute felt like it was taking forever.

Sophia sat in her room at home, she didn't want to be there, she was missing her daddy. Her mum didn't understand, she had sent her to bed to have a nap. She wasn't tired, she just wanted to be back with her daddy and Dixie. Sophia wondered what her daddy was doing now, he was probably at work with Dixie and Tamzin saving lives of kids like herself. She looked out of the window, she wished that she could be with her daddy. 'Sophia,' her mum called. Sophia sighed, she wasn't happy here now. 'Sophia, tea.' Sophia turned around when Lucy came in. 'Didn't you hear me?'

'I did.'

'Then why didn't you come downstairs?'

'I don't want to.'

'Honestly, two weeks with your dad and his horrible wife and you've changed.' Sophia folded her arms and glared at her mum, she hated anyone insulting her dad and Dixie. 'Now come downstairs, your dad is home.'

'He's not my dad,' Sophia muttered.

'I beg your pardon, young lady.'

'I said, he's not my dad. My dad lives in Holby and he's a brave man.'

'I could tell you many things about the man you call dad Sophia. Now, last time, come downstairs and say hello to your dad, you will call him dad, is that clear?'

'No, I won't.'

'Fine, you won't have any tea or talk to Jeff tonight until you apologise for what you said about your dad.'

'I hate you.'

'You're entitled.' Sophia sat down on her bed, she would never call that man downstairs dad, he was not her dad and never would be. She hated being here, she wanted to be back with Dixie and her daddy. She pulled her tongue out at her mother as she walked out of the room, she would not apologise, she meant everything that she had said. Sophia stood up and looked out of the window again, she didn't want to be here.

Dixie sipped at her peppermint tea, it was settling her stomach, she sighed in relief as her sickness started to disappear. She knew that if it got worse then she would have to tell Jeff, if she didn't tell him then he would only get mad when she did eventually start being sick. As long as she kept drinking the tea then she could get through the day. She went out into the garage and watched over all the people walking around and doing their jobs. Tamzin and Jeff were talking to each other in front of one of the ambulances, she wondered what they were talking about, probably Sophia and John. She watched everyone, she was proud of them all, they did a very difficult job and every day she was reminded how special each of the people she worked with were.

Tamzin stood with Jeff, he had been talking about the kids, she could see how much he loved them. He'd told her all about the time they had spent together in the fortnight that they were here. 'You miss them.'

'Yes, I do. I'm worried about Sophia, she really didn't want to go home this time.'

'She's a lovely girl Jeff.'

'Thanks Tamzin.'

'I mean it, you should be so proud of her.'

'I am, she's so clever and so pretty.'

'I can imagine you interrogating her boyfriend when he comes around to visit.'

'I will do, if anyone hurts my kids then I will make them suffer.'

'You're a very good dad Jeff.'

'Dixie says that too.'

'She's right, Sophia and John are lucky children to have a dad like you.' Tamzin smiled at the expression on Jeff's face, she had clearly made him happy.

Jeff smiled at Tamzin's words, he could tell that she was genuine. He looked at his watch, there was only an hour until he could home and then he would be able to speak to his children. He saw Dixie coming out of her office and down to where he was standing. 'Hey Dix, are you all right?'

'Yes, I was feeling a bit sick before but it has passed now.'

'Are you sure you're all right?'

'I think it is just morning sickness starting.'

'Morning sickness? It is almost evening.'

'It is just a name Jeff, it can happen at any time.'

'You haven't been sick though have you Dixie?'

'No, just feeling it, peppermint tea helps me.'

'Good, if you want to go home you will tell me, won't you?'

'Yes, if I feel worse then I will tell you and you can order me to go home.'

'Good.' Jeff was happy that Dixie had told him how she was feeling, he knew that it was a normal part of pregnancy and he just hoped that she didn't get her morning sickness too badly.

Dixie felt a bit better now that she had told Jeff how she was feeling, she thought that he deserved to know. It was quite nice that he cared for her so, it reminded her that he loved her and cared for her. Jeff picked up his phone when it rang, it must be the kids calling him, they were a bit early though. Dixie felt worry run through her when Jeff's expression changed. 'Jeff, what's wrong?' He held his hand up as he spoke to the person on the other end, she wondered what was going on.

'What did you say to her?' Dixie couldn't hear the person speaking but Jeff sounded angry.

'I hope you're satisfied, if she gets hurt then it is your fault Lucy.' Jeff looked furious, something was obviously going on.

'Jeff, what is wrong?'

'It's Sophia, she's run away. She had an argument with Lucy and she told Sophia that she couldn't speak to me. It appears she has gone to get the train to come here.'

'When did she leave, do we know?'

'They're not sure, she was at the train station about five. She got on a train for Holby not long afterwards, the police saw it on the cameras.'

'We need to go to the train station.'

'I know, the train she got on is due to get into Holby about seven.'

'Okay. I hope she's all right.'

'I do too. If anything happens to her then I will never forgive myself.'

'Jeff, this isn't your fault. Come on, let's get to the train station and meet her there.' Dixie was worried too, Sophia was so young, too young to be travelling on her own.

Jeff drove as quick as he could to the train station, he hadn't even bothered getting changed, he just wanted to get there and make sure that Sophia wasn't alone when she got off the train. He was so angry at Lucy, she wouldn't tell him what she had said to Lucy that made her leave, she implied that he had been putting ideas in Sophia's head. He would get the whole story from Sophia as soon as possible. Jeff ran through the station and looked at the arrivals board, he was aware of Dixie stood by his side. 'There,' he said, pointing at the board. 'Platform six.' He quickly moved in the direction of Platform six, one of the upsides to the uniform was that people got out of his way when they saw him running.

Dixie stood with Jeff who was pacing along the platform. 'Jeff, stop pacing, you're making me dizzy.'

'I can't help it Dixie, my little girl is on a train all alone. Who knows what has happened to her in all that time.'

'She'll be all right, Sophia is a resourceful girl.'

'I hope you're right.'

'I am, she takes after you.' Dixie saw Jeff pale as the train pulled in, he watched all the people pile off and saw him get more worried as Sophia was nowhere to be seen. 'Jeff, she's over there.' Dixie followed Jeff as he ran to Sophia and hugged her.

'Sophia Collier, don't you dare scare me like that ever again.'

'I'm sorry daddy, I had to come here, mummy wouldn't let me speak to you. She told me that you weren't my daddy.'

'Of course I'm your daddy, I always will be.'

'I don't want that man as my daddy, she told me I had to call him dad.'

'It's okay my little princess, we'll get this sorted out.' Dixie knew that Jeff wasn't really mad, he was just upset and scared.

'Jeff, we should get her home, she looks tired and hungry.'

'Mummy said I couldn't have any tea until I apologised for saying he wasn't my dad. She said Dixie was horrible, I hate mummy.' Dixie looked at the little girl, she wasn't surprised that Lucy didn't like her or that she had called her horrible, she didn't care, Lucy could think whatever she liked.

Jeff was relieved that Sophia was safe, he was furious with Lucy, what she had said had made Sophia want to run away. What if something had happened to her on the way here? He held Sophia's hand as they walked through the station, he wasn't going to let her go now that he knew she was safe. He was going to have a serious conversation with Lucy once Sophia was home and had something hot to eat inside of her. He was angry, upset and relieved all at the same time. How had she not noticed that her youngest daughter had slipped out of the house? Jeff put Sophia in the car and fastened her seatbelt, he closed the door and leaned against the car. 'Jeff, are you all right?'

'I am now, I'll be even better once I have a word with Lucy.'

'Perhaps you should calm down first, you're angry and that is not the best time to talk to someone.'

'Maybe you're right, Sophia needs to come first.'

'We'll get some chips on the way home, it is quick and the poor girl needs something to eat.'

'Right, good plan.' Jeff got in the car, Dixie was right, Sophia had to be his first priority, he was slowly getting over the scare that she had given him, once he had calmed down a bit more then he would talk to Lucy and let her know exactly what he thought of her.


	18. Chapter Eighteen

**Author: Raven Shadowrose**

**Rating: M  
**

**Pairing: ?/?**

**Summary: Sequel to Epiphany, Jeff and Dixie are trying to have a baby, what happens when it is likely to be more difficult than they first thought?**

**Disclaimer: I do not know or own any of the characters from Casualty, any original characters and the story are my property and I do not give permission for either of them to be used.**

**A/N: This is a direct sequel to Epiphany, please read that first to understand this story :) Reviews are welcome :)**

******************************Thank you to BeethovenRIP and chan. nelson4444 for your reviews :) **

* * *

**Chapter Eighteen.**

Dixie sensed that Jeff was angry, she understood, what Lucy had said to Sophia was horrible. What was Lucy trying to achieve by making Sophia call another man dad and then not letting her speak to her real dad when she refused to do it? It was worse now, Jeff knew that she was trying to replace him as their dad, she had hoped that he would never find out. Dixie knew that she was going to have to calm Jeff down before he talked to Lucy, if he spoke to her while he was still angry then he would make things a lot worse than they were at the moment. She'd got Jeff to send Lucy a message saying that Sophia was safe and that he would call her later, she didn't think that it was wise for Jeff to talk to her right now.

They'd stopped off for fish and chips on the way back from the train station, Sophia was now quite happily tucking into hers, the poor kid was very hungry, leaving a child without food is no way to punish them. Little Abs was quite happy to see Sophia, she was feeding him chips under the table. Dixie was feeling quite angry, anything could have happened to Sophia when she left that house. She tried to stay calm, if she got angry too then it would be a lot harder to calm Jeff down. Jeff was angry but he was worried too, she could see it in his eyes, he was thinking about every little thing that could have happened to Sophia while she had been travelling from London to Holby. She could tell he was not himself, he was picking at his food and not really eating it, it was unlike Jeff not to eat.

Dixie put the plates in the sink, she would deal with them soon, right now she was more bothered about getting Sophia to bed, the young girl was beginning to look tired. 'Come on scrap, say goodnight to your dad.' Sophia got up from the table and hugged Jeff, he hugged her back and then reluctantly let go of her. 'Goodnight Sophia, my little princess.'

'Goodnight daddy.' Dixie went upstairs with Sophia, she was surprised that Sophia had brought a bag with her when she left London, it proved her suspicions, Sophia was very resourceful. 'Sophia, how did you know what to bring with you?'

'My bag was still packed from when we came here, I just took it with me.' Dixie remembered washing John and Sophia's clothes before they went back home. 'Find your toothbrush and get yourself something to wear for bed.'

'Okay.' Dixie looked through Sophia's bag with her, most of the stuff that she had washed for Sophia was still in there, it would keep her going for a while until they decided what was going to happen. Sophia pulled out some pyjamas and Dixie put them on the bed, she then sat down to wait for Sophia to come back.

Jeff sat at the table, he was thinking, what had Sophia done that was so bad that Lucy would have a go at her like that? He knew what it was, she had stayed loyal to him and wouldn't call another man dad. Was Lucy trying to make the kids believe that someone else loved them more? Never, nobody would ever love those kids more than he did. He was still angry, someone could have hurt Sophia, could have kidnapped her, a lot of things could have happened to her while she was alone. Jeff had no idea what was going to happen now, he would have to talk to Dixie, they had work in the morning, what were they going to do with Sophia?

Dixie helped Sophia into bed and pulled the quilt up around her to keep her warm. 'Dixie, is daddy mad at me?'

'No, he is just afraid, you could have got hurt.'

'I had to see him, mummy was horrible to me.'

'I know, don't worry about that now, get some sleep.'

'Goodnight Dixie.'

'You know where we are if you need us, just come in and wake us up if you need anything.'

'Okay, thank you.'

'Goodnight Sophia, do you need me to stay until you fall asleep?'

'I'm okay, maybe you should go and hug daddy, he looks sad.'

'I will do, I'll give him a special hug from you too.'

'I'd like that, make sure you tell him it is from me.'

'I will.' Dixie kissed Sophia on the head and closed the door, now she had to sort Jeff out. She went downstairs, Jeff had to talk to Lucy, it was going to be unpleasant but it had to be done.

Jeff had moved onto the sofa while Dixie was upstairs, he was watching the television but wasn't taking any of it in. He registered Dixie coming into the room but he just continued staring at the television until she turned it off and hugged him. 'That's from Sophia, she thinks you look sad.'

'I'm not sad, I'm angry, Lucy is trying to erase me from their lives, she's getting them to call another man dad.'

'She's trying, I think she's failing. Look at what Sophia did, she travelled all the way here to be with her daddy. I don't think Lucy has any hope of turning them against you.'

'We don't know that, she might succeed with John.'

'She won't.'

'How do you know?'

'Because those kids love you, no matter what Lucy says or does she will never change that.'

'You sound sure.'

'I am.' Jeff sighed and hugged Dixie, he hoped that she was right.

'I need to call Lucy.'

'Are you sure that you're calm enough to talk to her?'

'Yes, stay with me though, I need you here Dixie.'

'I'm not going anywhere.'

'Thank you.' Jeff reached over and took Dixie's hand in his, he really needed her around while he talked to Lucy.

Dixie sat with Jeff as he picked up the phone and dialled Lucy's number, she wasn't sure what was going to happen. She heard Lucy answer and Jeff start talking to her, he'd put the phone onto the speaker phone so she could hear everything. 'Jeff.'

'I thought you should know that Sophia is fine, she's in bed and is sleeping.'

'This is all your fault, you and that woman of yours, you've put ideas into her head.'

'My fault? You told Sophia that she had to call another man dad, then you told her she couldn't speak to me and couldn't have anything to eat when she refused. What did you hope to achieve?'

'I was hoping they would forget about you, I should have never let them start seeing you again. I wanted to remove your influence but I can see that Sophia thinks that you're some kind of hero. She is too like you, there is no getting that out of her now. I hope you're happy.'

'I know what your problem is, she reminds you of me, that is why you have been so hard on her. You'd punish your own daughter because of that reason?'

'She always was more like you than me, do you think I want to be reminded of you? I made a mistake in ever marrying you, it was the worst decision of my life.'

'You heartless bitch.' Dixie squeezed Jeff's hand, she sensed he was getting agitated and worked up.

'I don't care, you can keep her, I don't want her back after what she's done.'

'You'd let her go, just like that?'

'Why not, she has made it very clear that she doesn't want to be here.'

'Right, you can drop Sophia's stuff here and I'll look after her.'

'Fine, I'll be there at weekend.'

'Good.'

'Then it is settled.'

'It is.'

'Bye Jeff.' Lucy put the phone down and Dixie stared at Jeff, how would they cope with looking after a young girl with their jobs? A lot of things were going to have to change now.

Jeff was shocked, Lucy had abandoned Sophia because she was like him, how was he going to tell her that her mum didn't want her? 'Dixie, what are we going to do?'

'Start with one day at a time, we're going to have to go to work tomorrow, Tamzin is off this week so we can ask her if she will look after Sophia for us. I do not think that she will mind.'

'Okay, what about after that?'

'I don't know.'

'There is so much to do, she has to be in a school and then we have our shifts to think about.'

'Jeff, calm down. You don't have to think about all that now. It has been a long day, I think you should go and get some sleep. You're not thinking straight.'

'Maybe you're right, will you call Tamzin?'

'Yes, I will.'

'Thanks Dixie. I'm just going to see Sophia.'

'Don't wake her up.'

'I won't, I just need to see her.'

'All right, go on up love, I'll be there shortly.' Jeff smiled at Dixie, he still didn't know what he was going to do but she was right, they needed to sleep.

Jeff quietly walked up the stairs and opened the door to where Sophia was sleeping, he just looked at her, she was deeply asleep. He kissed her head and stroked her hair, she didn't move, he was happy that she was sleeping. 'My brave little princess.' He wondered again how he was going to tell her that her mum didn't want her. Jeff decided that he would tell her she was staying here because he and Dixie wanted her to. He would tell her that they had decided she could stay here because they loved her so much. Jeff wasn't sure what they would do about John, would he want to stay with his mum or would he want to come here too? Jeff kissed Sophia's head again and quietly left the room, he didn't want to disturb her, it was best that she slept, she'd had quite the adventure today.

Jeff went into the room he shared with Dixie, he was tired, he felt like the whole world was against him right now. He had Sophia to take care of, work to worry about, then there was Dixie and the baby to think of, how was he going to juggle all of those things? He was still thinking when Dixie came in and sat by him on the bed. 'Tamzin will look after Sophia next week for us.'

'What did you tell her?'

'Everything, she's quite angry at Lucy.'

'So am I.'

'I know, come on love, let's go to bed. You're tired and you need to rest Jeff.'

'You're right, as always.' Jeff hugged and then kissed Dixie, everything was very uncertain right now, plans would have to be made, they would have to move house too, there wasn't enough room for Sophia and the new baby in this one. Jeff sighed, he would think about it all tomorrow.

Dixie climbed into bed, Jeff was already lying down, he was staring at the ceiling. 'Jeff?'

'Dixie.'

'Come here love.' She let Jeff cuddle up to her, he'd had it rough today, Sophia being all alone had scared him, and though she knew he'd never admit it, his emotions were all in a mess. 'It will be okay, we'll get through this.' Jeff didn't answer, she hoped that her words had brought him some comfort. Dixie held Jeff, it was all she could do for him right now, there was a lot to do in the coming weeks and he would need her support. 'Goodnight Jeff, get some sleep.'

'Goodnight Dixie.' Dixie held Jeff in her arms until she was sure that he was asleep, being asleep was the best thing for him. She closed her eyes and listened to Jeff's breathing, it always helped lull her into a deep sleep.


	19. Chapter Nineteen

**Author: Raven Shadowrose**

**Rating: M  
**

**Pairing: ?/?**

**Summary: Sequel to Epiphany, Jeff and Dixie are trying to have a baby, what happens when it is likely to be more difficult than they first thought?**

**Disclaimer: I do not know or own any of the characters from Casualty, any original characters and the story are my property and I do not give permission for either of them to be used.**

**A/N: This is a direct sequel to Epiphany, please read that first to understand this story :) Reviews are welcome :)**

******************************Thank you to BeethovenRIP, olivia. c. king1 and chan. nelson4444 for your reviews :) **

* * *

**Chapter Nineteen.**

Jeff woke immediately when the alarm went off, he remembered everything that happened yesterday, Sophia running away and coming here, Lucy telling him that she didn't want Sophia back. He still had to go to work today, there was nothing they could do about it at such short notice. Tamzin would look after Sophia so that was one worry off his mind, for now anyway. Jeff noticed Dixie stirring beside him. 'Morning princess.'

'Are you feeling any better Jeff?'

'Not really, there is so much we have to think about.'

'I know, can we put it on hold until later?'

'I suppose you're right, it won't do me any good thinking about it right now.'

'It won't, let's get work out of the way and then we can talk to Sophia and let her know what is happening.'

'How do you always know what to do Dixie?'

'I'm a genius.' Jeff smiled, he couldn't help it, Dixie always knew what to say to help him feel better.

'A smile, that's better. Don't worry Jeff, we are going to get through this.'

'I know, I think I do anyway.'

'Come on, let's get up and get ready. Tamzin will be here soon.'

'You're right.' Jeff pulled the covers, he was going to have to face the day sooner or later, it wasn't going to go away.

Dixie put some bread into the toaster and set about making some tea for herself and Jeff, he was still very distracted after the events of yesterday. She heard the tap on the door, it would be Tamzin, she was right on time. 'Come in Tamzin, the door is open.' Dixie busied herself with putting the toast onto plates and buttering it. She turned her attention to the tea as Tamzin walked in the door. 'Morning Dixie.'

'Hi Tamzin, I'm sorry for getting you up so early on your week off, I didn't know who else to ask. Can I get you a drink or something to eat?'

'It's all right Dixie, Sophia is a lovely girl. I don't know what Lucy could be thinking treating her like that. I'm okay for now, I don't usually eat this early.'

'I don't know either, are you sure? I can get you something.'

'I'm okay, really, I'll have something later. How is Jeff?'

'He's angry, he has every right to be. I'm mad too, anything could have happened to Sophia.'

'I'm just thankful that it didn't. What is going to happen now?'

'I don't know, she's staying with us but we have a lot think about, schools and so on.'

'I can help with that if you like.'

'Thank you, we really appreciate this.' Dixie called up to Jeff and he came down to the kitchen, she was worrying about him, he was very rarely this quiet or subdued, she would talk to him before they started their shift together.

Jeff ate the toast that Dixie put in front of him, he was doing it to keep her happy, he knew that she would worry about him if he didn't eat. He sipped at his tea, it was just the way that he liked it. 'Thanks Dixie.'

'No problem.' He put his plate into the sink and carried on drinking his tea, he was feeling a bit better now that he had food in his stomach. 'Thank you Tamzin for looking after Sophia.'

'That's all right Jeff, she's no trouble.'

'Will you tell her when she wakes up that I love her and we will be back later.'

'Of course I will.' Jeff nodded and smiled at Tamzin, he was lucky to have people that he could rely on around him. He went upstairs and into Sophia's room, he tiptoed quietly to her bed, she was still fast asleep. He looked down at Sophia and smiled. He gently kissed her on the head. 'Daddy has to go to work but I will see you later. I love you Sophia.' He went back out of the room quietly and then joined Dixie downstairs. He wanted to say that he loved her himself, he knew that Tamzin would tell her what he said but he wanted to tell her too.

Dixie and Jeff said goodbye to Tamzin and went to work, Dixie had given her instructions to get herself something to eat and to make herself at home. They made it to the station in time for the start of the shift and got themselves changed. Dixie was thinking about Sophia and Jeff, it was going to be a big learning curve for them all. They were going to have to get used to having a child around that would need looking after and arrangements would need to be made for when they were on a shift that would clash with Sophia's school time. They were going to need a child minder too. Dixie mentally told herself off, she had told Jeff to put things aside while they were at work and she was thinking about everything herself. She clipped the radio onto her belt, she was ready for the day ahead.

Sophia woke up to find herself in her room at her dad's house, she remembered running away and getting on the train to Holby. She was glad that her dad was waiting for her when she got off the train. She had to be with him and Dixie, she liked them and they liked her. Sophia got out of bed and went into the hall, it was quiet, she went downstairs and found Tamzin sat on the sofa. 'Tamzin, where are daddy and Dixie?'

'They had to go to work so they sent me to look after you.'

'Okay.' Sophia climbed onto the sofa beside Tamzin.

'Your dad told me to tell you that he loved you and he will see you later.'

'Do you know if I can stay with daddy and Dixie?'

'No, I think they want to talk to you later.'

'I want to stay here, I don't like mummy, she said horrible things about daddy.'

'I know, Dixie told me what she said.'

'Then you know why I don't like mummy.' Sophia snuggled up to Tamzin, she hoped that she could stay with her dad and Dixie and she wouldn't be made to go back to London.

Dixie sat with Jeff in the rec room on their break, she looked at the text message that she had just received. 'Sophia is awake, Tamzin has given her some breakfast and she's making sure that she takes a shower.'

'Oh good, is she all right?'

'Tamzin says that she's asking if she can stay with us.'

'I think we should tell her when we get back.'

'That would be for the best, telling her face to face is better.'

'Yes, I'm not going to tell her what Lucy said. All she has to know is that we've decided to let her stay with us and Lucy has agreed to it.'

'Okay, she will not hear it from me, that horrible woman has done enough to that poor child.' She noted that Jeff stayed silent at that comment. 'Jeff, are you all right, you've been quiet all day.'

'When I think what could have happened to Sophia out there on her own.'

'It didn't, she's safe with us now and we're not going to let anything happen to her.'

'I know, nobody will hurt her while we're around.'

'Try and put yesterday behind you Jeff, we have more important things to think about.'

'I know.' Dixie watched Jeff's hand sit on top of her stomach. 'I think you're growing a little bit there Dixie.'

'Maybe, I have noticed my stomach is a little more rounded than usual.'

'How are you feeling?'

'I'm getting a little bit of sickness every so often but other than that I'm fine.'

'You will let me know if it gets too bad, won't you?'

'Yes, don't worry, right now I'm all right.'

'Good.' Dixie smiled at Jeff, he was definitely feeling protective of her, she was trying not to get mad as he had been through a rough couple of days and getting protective of her was his way of dealing with it.

Sophia was getting impatient, Tamzin had told her that her dad and Dixie were on their way back. She heard the car door close and she went to Dixie when she came in and hugged her. 'Hello Dixie.'

'Hi lovely, have you been okay?'

'I have, Tamzin made me lunch and we played with Little Abs.'

'Good, I am glad to hear it.'

'Where's daddy?'

'He's just locking the car.' Sophia waited for Jeff to come in and then she hugged him tight.

'Hello daddy.'

'Hello, my little princess. Come and sit with me, I want to tell you something.' Sophia took Jeff's hand and went into the lounge with him.

Jeff sat Sophia on his knee. 'Now then, Sophia, you must promise me that you won't run away again. You gave me quite a scare.'

'I know, I'm sorry daddy, I promise I won't run away again.'

'That's all right. I talked to your mum last night and we agreed that you should stay here for a while.'

'Can I really stay here with you, Dixie and Little Abs?'

'Yes, it has been decided.'

'Yay, thank you daddy. I like being here.'

'We like you being here.'

'Do I have to go to school?'

'Yes, we will find somewhere for you to go to school.'

'Please make it somewhere nice.'

'Of course I will, nothing is too good for my little princess.'

'What about my clothes and my favourite toys?'

'Your mum is bringing them to us at the weekend.'

'Do I have to see her?'

'Not if you don't want to.'

'She might make me go home, I don't want to go home.'

'Don't worry my little princess, nobody is going to make you go anywhere that you don't want to.'

'Thank you daddy.' Jeff held Sophia close to him, nobody would take her away from him.

Dixie sat down at the table in the kitchen, the sickness from earlier took over and she took a few deep breaths to try and rid herself of the churning feeling in her stomach. She slowly sipped at a glass of water and when she felt a bit better she stood up. She was glad that it wasn't too bad right now, she also hoped that it wouldn't get much worse in the weeks to come. Dixie looked at Sophia as she came in the kitchen. 'Daddy says I can stay.'

'Are you happy?'

'Yes, very, I do miss John a little bit though.'

'We can invite him for tea this weekend if you want, I'm sure your mum will bring him when she drops all of your clothing off.'

'Yay, thank you Dixie.' Dixie smiled as Sophia hugged her tightly, the little girl reminded her of Jeff, she had his eyes and his loving personality. Lucy didn't deserve Sophia and Sophia was much better off without that woman in her life.

Dixie left Sophia playing with Little Abs in the garden and went into Jeff, he was looking at a piece of paper. 'Tamzin left us a list of schools in the area, I didn't realise there were so many.'

'We have time to look at them and make a decision.'

'I want her to go somewhere good Dixie, somewhere she can get a proper education.'

'I know you do, we will find her somewhere decent to go.'

'Thanks Dixie, I know all of this is very stressful and probably at the wrong time.'

'Don't worry about it Jeff, we're in this together, you and me.'

'Has anyone told you you're an incredible woman?'

'You, I do believe this is the second time actually.'

'I mean it. What did I do to deserve you?'

'You must have been good to someone in a past life.' Jeff smiled and Dixie put her hand on top of his, there was a lot of work to do in the coming weeks, moving house was looking like a very real possibility and finding Sophia a school. First of all they had to deal with Lucy and Dixie feared that it would not be a pleasant meeting.


	20. Chapter Twenty

**Author: Raven Shadowrose**

**Rating: M  
**

**Pairing: ?/?**

**Summary: Sequel to Epiphany, Jeff and Dixie are trying to have a baby, what happens when it is likely to be more difficult than they first thought?**

**Disclaimer: I do not know or own any of the characters from Casualty, any original characters and the story are my property and I do not give permission for either of them to be used.**

**A/N: This is a direct sequel to Epiphany, please read that first to understand this story :) Reviews are welcome :)**

******************************Thank you to BeethovenRIP and chan. nelson4444 for your reviews, enjoy this chapter ladies :) **

* * *

**Chapter Twenty.**

The rest of the week passed quickly and Jeff soon found himself anxiously waiting for Lucy, he'd suggested that they meet where she dropped the kids off when they came to visit. He didn't want her coming to the house, Sophia had decided that she didn't want to see her mum so Dixie had stayed with her and he'd come to get Sophia's things from Lucy. He'd arrived early, he wanted to give himself some time to calm down and be ready to face her when she got here. He wasn't looking forward to meeting with her at all, it was likely to be very unpleasant.

Jeff saw Lucy drive into the car park and pull up next to him, he took a deep breath and got out of the car, he was going to have to face her sooner or later. He watched Lucy take Sophia's things out of the car, there was more than he expected there to be. He couldn't put it off any longer, he stood by quietly as Lucy took the last bag out of the boot. 'Is that all of Sophia's things?'

'Yes, where's Sophia?'

'She's at home with Dixie. Where's John?'

'John is at home, I need to do this alone. Oh yes, the other woman, what is she doing there?'

'She doesn't want to see you.'

'I see, you're doing a good job of turning her against me even more.'

'No, you did that yourself.'

'It doesn't have to be like this Jeff, maybe we can work something out.' Jeff felt Lucy's hand move up his chest. 'I could get rid of Alan and you could divorce Dixie and we could raise the kids together, both us, we were good together once.' Lucy fiddled with the button on Jeff's shirt and he moved away from her.

'I don't know what game you're playing Lucy, I will not divorce Dixie, I love her, I would never hurt her like that.'

'I don't know what you see in her, you could have me, does she know what you like Jeff? Does she know what turns you on? Do you remember when we made love outside, does sensible Dixie have the guts to do that?'

'I don't want you, is that clear?'

'Even when I'm throwing myself at you?'

'You're desperate Lucy, sad and desperate, you only want me because you can't have me. You've always been the same, you want what doesn't belong to you. That is why you cheated, you wanted what wasn't yours and now you have it, you're still not satisfied.'

'You don't know anything.'

'Yes, I do. I know that once you've got your claws into me again then you'll look for the next thing that you can't have and go after whoever that is. Get used to disappointment Lucy, because I will never be yours. I love Dixie, Sophia, and the baby, you aren't in the picture. Go back to Alan because I don't want you.'

'Then you can have your son too.'

'What?'

'You heard me, if you won't come back to me then I don't want anything at all to do with you.'

'You are a despicable woman.'

'I don't care what you think Jeff, I'll put John in a taxi to yours with all of his stuff.'

'No, you won't, I'll come and get him myself.'

'Fine.' Lucy turned on her heel and went back to her car, he couldn't believe what she had just tried to do and when he wouldn't leave Dixie she had just abandoned her son like she had done her daughter. Jeff fought to contain his anger, getting angry wouldn't solve anything.

Dixie was watching a cartoon with Sophia but the little girl seemed restless. 'Dixie, will daddy be okay?'

'Your daddy will be fine.'

'I am worried that mummy will be mean to him.'

'Don't worry, if she is then I will make your dad feel better.'

'How?'

'I will give him cuddles, a lot like I am doing to you now.'

'Okay, he will like that.' Dixie smiled at Sophia and kissed her head, she was a sweet girl.

'Do you want to take Little Abs for a walk with me?'

'Yes, I'll get my shoes on.' Dixie stood up and went to get her own shoes when the phone rang, she picked it up from the charger and answered it.

'Hello?'

'Dixie, I'm going to have to go to London.'

'London? Jeff, what is going on?'

'I'll explain later but can you get John's bed ready?'

'All right, Jeff, be careful.'

'I will, don't worry princess, I'll be back with you soon.'

'See you later Jeff.'

'See you later Dixie.' Dixie put the phone back in the charger and went to find Sophia, she wondered what had happened at the meeting with Lucy to make Jeff run off to London like that, was he bringing John back with him to stay for a few nights? Dixie sighed, she hoped that Jeff wasn't getting himself into trouble.

Jeff drove all the way to London, he was following Lucy and she didn't look as if she wanted to stop. He wasn't sure what was going through her mind, the last time they had met she insulted him and this time she had come on to him. He didn't trust her, what if this was all a ruse to get him to her place so she could try it on with him again, and then tell him that he couldn't have John. Why was she so quick to give up the kids? Did she really want to get rid of every bit of him that had ever been in her life? Jeff sighed, all he wanted to do was get John and get out of there. Jeff wanted to get John away from Lucy, she was acting very strange and he was worried that she may do something to him if John stayed there.

Jeff got out of the car in front of the house that Lucy stopped at, a man came out and John was with him, it looked as if Lucy had phoned ahead and told Alan to pack John's stuff. Lucy silently put John's stuff in his car and stood back. Jeff sensed the tension between Alan and Lucy, something wasn't right between them at all. 'John, why don't you get in the car?'

'Okay dad.' Jeff closed the door and went to get in the other side when Alan decided to break the silence.

'Lucy, what is going on?'

'John is going home with his dad.'

'Is this a permanent thing?'

'Yes, I want nothing of that man in my life.'

'They're your children.' Clearly Alan disapproved of Lucy's decision.

'They're his, come on Alan, we can always have kids of our own.'

'You know that I can't.'

'Then what use are you?'

'I'm not putting up with this, Lucy, you've changed, you're not the woman that you used to be.'

'What do you mean by that?'

'I mean, you're different, I don't know who you're becoming. Giving your kids away, having a go at Sophia because she didn't want to call me dad. I never wanted that, I was happy with her calling me Alan, it was you that insisted on it and look where that got you.'

'What do you know? You're useless as a man, you can't even father children.'

'I've had it Lucy, I'm moving out.' Jeff just stared at Lucy and Alan as they argued, he wasn't sure what to do, it wasn't really his place to get in the middle of them.

Jeff watched Alan go into the house, followed by Lucy, he could hear them arguing some more and then Alan came out of the house with a case in hand. He came over to Jeff. 'Look after them, they're good kids, they think the world of you.'

'I don't understand, aren't you supposed to hate me too?'

'No, I don't hate you, that's Lucy's thing. Between you and me, they're better off away from her, she's changed, she's not who she used to be. I'll give her some time to calm down and then I'll see if I can talk to her.' Jeff watched Alan walk away, he wasn't sure what to do, he had John waiting in the car and he really wanted to get his son away from this place. Jeff got into the car and put his seatbelt on.

'John, do you really want to go and live with me and Dixie?'

'Yes, mum has changed, she said horrible things to Sophia and made her run away. She said things to me too.'

'Like what?'

'That you weren't my dad.'

'Of course I'm your dad, I know it more than anything else in the whole world.'

'Can I see Sophia?'

'Of course you can, she's with Dixie. Come on son, let's get you home.'

'Okay.' Jeff wondered what else Lucy had said to John, maybe in time he would open up to either himself or Dixie. He started the engine and drove off, he was sure that he was doing the right thing in getting them away from Lucy.

Dixie let Sophia and Little Abs into the house, both the girl and the dog were very tired, they had been running around the park and playing. Sophia immediately took her shoes off, she went into the lounge and sat on the couch, Little Abs lay on the floor in front of her and Dixie smiled, the dog really loved Sophia. Dixie went to the phone and checked it, there weren't any messages, she was worrying about Jeff, she hadn't heard anything from him in a while. 'Sophia, I'm going to make up the other bed in your room, do you want to help me?'

'Can I stay here? I'm tired.'

'Of course you can.' Dixie smiled at Sophia and went upstairs, she took out the spare linen from the cupboard and made up a bed for John, she was still thinking about what Jeff was doing and where he was. She wondered if he was on the way back from London already. Once she was finished with making the bed she went downstairs and into the lounge. 'Sophia?' She went around the other side of the couch and saw Sophia sleeping on it, Dixie took the blanket down off the top of the sofa and carefully draped it over her. Dixie sat down on the other sofa and just watched Sophia for a while, she really was a lovely kid, how Lucy could abandon her like that Dixie didn't know.

Jeff stopped off at the services, he needed to call Dixie and get something to eat for himself and John. He took out his phone and dialled, he listened to the ringing and eventually Dixie picked up. 'Jeff?'

'It's me.'

'Where are you?'

'About half way home.'

'What is going on?'

'Can we talk about that when I get home? How's Sophia?'

'She's sleeping, she's been running about with Little Abs and it has tired her out.'

'It shouldn't be too long before we are back.'

'You're bringing John with you?'

'I am, he's coming to live with us too.'

'Jeff, why won't you tell me what is going on?'

'Okay, only because you're getting worked up and you need to stay calm.' Jeff explained everything to Dixie, what had happened with Lucy and how he'd had to go to London to pick John up. He left nothing out and then waited for Dixie to reply.

'She came on to you?'

'Yes, I told her no though.'

'I believe you, get back as soon as you can, that poor boy must be tired from travelling.' Jeff was relieved that Dixie believed him.

'I will get back as quickly as possible. I love you Dixie.'

'I love you too.' Jeff put the phone down, once they had finished eating then they would get back on the road.

Dixie didn't know what to make of what she had just heard, what kind of woman gets rid of her own children? She didn't get it, why were people like Lucy given the ability to have kids when she just abandons them? There were plenty of people in the world that would love to have children but couldn't. Dixie thought back to her own situation, she had gone through an operation just to have the child that she now carried in her belly and there was no way that she would ever give them up to anyone for any reason.

Dixie heard the car pull into the driveway and she got up, Sophia had woken up some time ago and they'd had something to eat, now she was watching cartoons. 'Is it daddy?'

'Yes love, he's back.' Dixie opened the door and let Jeff in, he was followed by a tired John. 'Right, bed for you young man.' Dixie was pleased that there was no argument from John, he was just about asleep on his feet. She sorted through his things and found him something to wear for bed whilst Jeff brought all of the bags inside. She made sure that John went straight to bed and then went back downstairs, she was glad to have Jeff and John back in one piece. She looked at all of the bags that now took up some of the lounge, Jeff looked just as tired as his son, clearly dealing with Lucy and driving for most of the day had taken it out of him. 'Bed for you too Mr Collier.'

'I can't, we have to sort out all of this stuff.'

'It will keep until tomorrow.'

'But Dixie...'

'No, you're tired and you need rest.'

'All right.' Dixie sent Jeff upstairs with orders to get into bed, once she got Sophia into bed then she would deal with Jeff. Dixie sighed quietly, Jeff had been through a lot today and he was going to need some comfort from her when she got into bed with him. He didn't like to admit it but sometimes he just wanted to be held, she would hold him and hug him as long as he needed her to.


	21. Chapter Twenty-One

**Author: Raven Shadowrose**

**Rating: M  
**

**Pairing: ?/?**

**Summary: Sequel to Epiphany, Jeff and Dixie are trying to have a baby, what happens when it is likely to be more difficult than they first thought?**

**Disclaimer: I do not know or own any of the characters from Casualty, any original characters and the story are my property and I do not give permission for either of them to be used.**

**A/N: This is a direct sequel to Epiphany, please read that first to understand this story :) Reviews are welcome :)**

******************************Thank you to BeethovenRIP and chan. nelson4444 for your reviews, get your tissues ready :( **

* * *

**Chapter Twenty-One.**

When Dixie awoke the following morning she found that Jeff wasn't there, it was only early so where had he got to? She quietly got out of bed, she opened the door to the room the kids were sleeping in, they were still fast asleep and she closed the door again. Dixie went downstairs and into the lounge, Jeff was sat on the couch, he looked quite upset. 'Jeff love, what are you doing down here?'

'I couldn't sleep.'

'How long have you been here?'

'About an hour.'

'Jeff it is seven in the morning.'

'I know.'

'What's wrong?'

'How are we going to cope Dixie, we both have full time jobs, how are we going to look after Sophia and John while we have to work?'

'We will work it out Jeff, I promise you, but now is not the time for us to do that.'

'How will we work it out?'

'We will think about that later, right now I want you to come back to bed and get some rest.'

'What good is that going to do?'

'I know you're tired Jeff, it was a long day for you yesterday.' Dixie sighed when Jeff didn't answer her, she was having a hard time getting through to him that getting some sleep would help him.

Jeff knew that Dixie meant well but he had to think about what he was going to do now, Sophia and John are his responsibility and he wanted to do the best that he could for them. He was frustrated because he wasn't getting anywhere, he'd tried to come up with all sorts of solutions but none of them seemed to work. 'Jeff, come on love, you need a few more hours sleep.'

'Is that your solution Dixie?'

'No, we can think together later on and come up with a solution.'

'What makes you think we will be able to?'

'Jeff, will you stop it, if you act like this then we will never find a solution.'

'Act like what?'

'You're being very pessimistic right now.'

'Speak English.'

'You're shooting down every suggestion that I have, if you keep on like that then this situation is never going to get sorted out.'

'Because it is always my fault, isn't it?'

'Right now, yes it is.'

'It is nice to know what you think of me.'

'Jeff, will you just stop it. Are you coming back to bed or not?'

'No, I'm staying here.'

'Okay, fine, don't then.'

'Fine, I won't then.' Jeff heard Dixie sigh quietly, she sounded a bit fed up.

'If you want to come up later then do so, then maybe we can figure out everything together.'

'What do you need my help for? This is all my fault like you said.'

'Jeff, you're acting like a child. We can't do anything to sort this out while you're in this sort of mood. I want to help you and the kids.'

'Oh yes, saint Dixie, wants to help everyone in the world.'

'Why are you being like this?'

'I just want to be left alone, just go upstairs and leave me alone.'

'Fine, I was only trying to help.'

'I don't want your help.' Jeff heard Dixie leave, he was feeling a bit guilty now, she'd only been trying to help him and he'd snapped at her. He was feeling very frustrated and angry at Lucy for abandoning Sophia and John, he was worried about the effect all of this was going to have on them. He'd taken all his frustration out on Dixie, he could tell that it had upset her, he'd heard the wavering in her voice in her last sentence to him. He felt even more guilty now, she was upstairs alone and probably quite upset, he had rejected her and Dixie always took rejection hard.

Dixie got back into the bed she shared with Jeff and curled up on her side, she didn't understand why he was having a go at her when she was only trying to help. Her body was changing and she was feeling sick a lot more now, not to mention that she was having to go to the toilet more often and her breasts were getting bigger and more tender, she was also feeling tired. Her hormones were making her feel strange, there were times when she felt like crying and now was one of them. She knew that Jeff's mood was a result of not enough sleep and the stress of Lucy abandoning the kids, she also knew that it wasn't anything to do with her. Why then was she taking it so personally? Dixie sighed, she just wanted to help Jeff and he was pushing her away. She felt tears running down her face, Jeff's rejection of her help had hurt, they had always been a team, what had changed, why was he pushing her away now? Dixie closed her eyes in an attempt to slow the tears that kept running down her face. She pulled the quilt up over her head, she didn't want anyone to see or hear her cry.

Jeff started sorting through the bags that belonged to Sophia and John, they had so much stuff and he had no idea where they were going to put it all. They were going to have to look at getting a bigger house as soon as possible and it would need four bedrooms. Jeff cursed Lucy, it was her fault that all this was happening. If she hadn't driven the kids away then they wouldn't be in this position. He loved both of his kids, Dixie loved them too but this situation was far from ideal. Jeff sighed, Dixie, he was still in two minds whether or not he should go upstairs and apologise to her. She might not want to see him after what he had said to her. He was feeling very guilty and it was beginning to get to him, he shouldn't have pushed her away like that. He knew that Dixie wouldn't want to see him right now, he picked up Little Abs' lead and took him for a walk, it might help to clear his head.

Dixie eventually got up and got dressed, she was going to have to face the day because it wasn't going to go away. She went into the bathroom and washed her face, it didn't improve the redness around her eyes, she wasn't going to be able to hide that she had been crying from anyone. She went downstairs, Jeff was nowhere to be seen, she noticed that Little Abs' lead was missing so he'd obviously gone out with the dog. Dixie went back upstairs and woke up the kids. 'John, Sophia, it is time to get up.' The kids slowly woke up and Dixie tried to smile at them, she didn't want them to know that it was Jeff that had upset her, they were going through enough right now. 'Go and have a wash and get yourselves dressed and then we'll have breakfast.' John went into the bathroom with his things and Dixie sat on the bed with Sophia. 'Dixie, have you been crying? You look upset, what happened?'

'I'm just not feeling very well, I will feel better when I've had something to eat.'

'Is it the baby? I heard babies can make people feel a bit sick in the morning.'

'You're right, it is morning sickness.'

'Can I help you make breakfast?'

'Of course you can.' Dixie hugged Sophia, the little girl was so sweet and the hug was making her feel a bit better.

Jeff walked Little Abs back to the house, he heard voices, the kids were obviously up and having breakfast which meant that Dixie was also up. He opened the door and went in, Sophia was buttering toast and John was eating cereal at the table. Dixie put two mugs of hot chocolate on the table, he noted the redness under her eyes and his guilt hit him even harder; she'd been crying. He sat at the table with the kids and took a piece of toast from the rack. 'Good morning daddy.'

'Morning Sophia.' She hugged him and he kissed her head, she wouldn't be this loving towards him if she found out that he had hurt Dixie.

'I'm helping Dixie, she's not feeling very well.'

'You're a good girl Sophia.'

'I know I am daddy.' Jeff took another piece of toast and ate it, Dixie hadn't spoken one word to him at all. He looked closely at her, she was pale and the redness under her eyes wasn't going away, he had upset her greatly and it was showing in her face. 'Okay kids, go upstairs and clean your teeth, make sure you do them properly.' Jeff heard the stress in Dixie's voice, she was just about keeping it together. She was obviously emotional already because of her hormones and he had made it worse, he was going to have to try and make it better.

'Dixie.' No answer. 'Come on princess, talk to me.'

'I am not in the mood for talking right now Jeffrey.'

'At least eat something.' Dixie didn't answer him, he decided to give her a break and let her come to him when she wanted to talk. Jeff went into the lounge and took the bags upstairs, maybe when he'd finished putting their clothes away then Dixie would be ready to talk to him.

Dixie ate a piece of toast and sat at the table, she was trying to keep herself together, she'd stopped crying some time ago but it still hurt. Jeff's words had hurt her a lot, his rejection of her help had combined with her already unsteady emotions to make her feel like she wanted to cry all the time. She blinked a few times to hold back the fresh wave of tears that were threatening to fall. Dixie stood up, she was tired, she felt like she wanted to lie down and not get up for a long time. She quietly went upstairs, she heard Jeff walking around in the other bedroom and talking to the kids, she tiptoed into their room, she didn't want Jeff to know that she was up here. Dixie lay down on the bed and closed her eyes, she too was feeling the stress and strain of what Lucy had done. She was feeling the start of a headache, the headache always hit her behind the eyes when she was stressed.

Jeff heard Dixie come up the stairs, she thought she was being quiet but the top step always creaked and she had stepped on it. He stood outside their room and put his hand against the wood, he wanted to go into her and apologise for what he'd said to her. Jeff sighed and pushed open the door and saw Dixie was lying on her side and facing the window. Jeff sat on the bed and put his hand on Dixie's arm, she pulled her arm away and he placed his hand on the bed. 'Dixie, come on princess, please, I know I hurt you and I'm sorry. You were only trying to help, I shouldn't have taken my mood out on you.'

'You don't see it do you Jeff?'

'See what?'

'I am struggling too, suddenly we've got two children to look after and work to juggle. I'm pregnant and my hormones are all over the place, I'm starting to feel sick and everything is changing. Everything is piling on top of us Jeff and we need to work together, if we don't stick together then we might not survive this.' Jeff felt his mouth fall open, the thought of losing Dixie and the baby filled him with horror.

'Dixie, you can't mean that, you wouldn't leave me, would you?'

'If you keep pushing me away and not letting me help then we're going to fall to pieces.' Jeff was astounded but he knew that Dixie was right, if they didn't stick together then their life would be in even more of a mess than it was now.

Dixie hated hurting Jeff but she needed him to see that they needed to work together now more than ever. It was unfortunate that all of this had happened but if they were going to work everything out then they would have to be a team and stick together. Dixie turned over and looked at Jeff, he was crying, she sat up and hugged him. 'I wondered when you would break down, all of this has got to you, she has got to you. There's no shame in needing support Jeff.'

'Please don't leave me, you can't leave me, I need you and our baby.'

'I'm not going to leave you, I love you.'

'I love you Dixie.'

'I'm sorry that I made you think I would leave you. You can't keep pushing me away Jeff, you need to let me in.'

'I'm sorry Dixie, I've been stupid, haven't I?'

'Yes, you have, but I forgive you.' Dixie felt Jeff hold her tightly, she really hated it when they argued and weren't getting along. She needed Jeff to help her through the pregnancy and he needed her to help him with the kids and the arrangements for their care and schooling.

Jeff was relieved that Dixie had forgiven him for his words this morning, he just held her in his arms, hearing her say that they might not survive this had shocked him. He didn't want to lose Dixie and the baby, they meant everything to him. 'I promise you that I won't push you away again Dixie.'

'Good, together we can survive anything.'

'What are we going to do?'

'We'll think it through and come up with a proper plan, starting with what we're going to do with the kids while we're at work and finding them a school. Don't worry Jeff, I am with you and always will be.' Jeff held on to Dixie and kissed her head, he loved her so much. The days ahead were going to be hard but he would get through them with Dixie by his side.


	22. Chapter Twenty-Two

**Author: Raven Shadowrose**

**Rating: M  
**

**Pairing: ?/?**

**Summary: Sequel to Epiphany, Jeff and Dixie are trying to have a baby, what happens when it is likely to be more difficult than they first thought?**

**Disclaimer: I do not know or own any of the characters from Casualty, any original characters and the story are my property and I do not give permission for either of them to be used.**

**A/N: This is a direct sequel to Epiphany, please read that first to understand this story :) Reviews are welcome :)**

******************************Thank you to BeethovenRIP, olivia. c. king1 and chan. nelson4444 for your reviews, I hope you like the chapter :) **

* * *

**Chapter Twenty-Two.**

Dixie sat at the table in the kitchen with the laptop, she'd managed to organise a child minder for the kids, she'd arranged the rotas so that herself and Jeff only worked days for the time being. Dixie was relieved that Nadia, the child minder, had been able to take John and Sophia at such short notice. They really liked her and she was very capable, she was still hired on a trial basis but it was beginning to look like she would be hired full time. Dixie had talked to John and Sophia and they had been having fun, they didn't seem to mind being left with someone else while herself and Jeff worked.

The kids were off school for another fortnight and by then she hoped to have found a place for them in the local high school. Dixie hoped that if she explained the situation to the school that they would let them get the kids in quickly. She didn't want them to miss out on too much schooling, especially as Sophia was just starting high school. Dixie sighed, there was a lot to think about, she was thankful that Jeff was working with her now and not shutting her out. She was still feeling a little bit guilty for making Jeff think that she would leave him but it was the only thing that she had come up with to shock him out of his mood. It was typical Jeff, he was thinking the kids were his responsibility and that he should deal with it all.

Jeff went into the kitchen, Dixie was looking at the laptop and frowning, she was obviously looking at schools. 'Dixie, what are you frowning about?'

'I want to get Sophia and John into school as quickly as possible, the local high school has places but I'm not sure that there is anyone there as it is the holidays.'

'Why don't you phone them?'

'I tried that but nobody is picking up.'

'It is quite late Dixie, leave it until tomorrow and then we can phone them again.'

'Yeah, you're probably right.' Jeff watched Dixie shut down the laptop and put it away.

'I am, we'll take the number to work with us and then we'll call them as soon as we get a spare moment.'

'Right, that's sensible.'

'Don't sound too surprised Dixie, I can be sensible every now and then.'

'I know, I just want everything to go right.'

'I appreciate everything that you're doing for them.'

'I love them too Jeff, I just want the best for them.'

'I know you do princess.' Jeff hugged Dixie, he didn't want her getting too stressed out as it was bad for her and the baby.

Dixie went into the lounge, trying to find a way to get in touch with the school had stressed her out, she should have realised that they would be closed as it was after six. She was trying to do right by the kids and get them into school so they could have a proper education. Dixie closed her eyes and tried to shut off the headache that was forming, she knew that it was the stress and pressure of trying to organise everything. 'Dixie, here, take these.' Dixie gratefully took the painkillers from Jeff and swallowed them down with the water he held out to her. 'Thanks love.'

'No problem princess. Why don't you go and have a lie down?'

'I'll be all right.'

'Are you sure?'

'Yeah, I'll just sit here for a while.'

'Okay, if you're sure.'

'I am, really, I just need a little quiet time.'

'All right princess.' Dixie smiled at Jeff, he meant well and was just trying to look after her, she was trying her best not to tell him off for being protective of her. He had been through a lot the past week and a bit and he was compensating by trying to look after her. Dixie lay back on the sofa and closed her eyes, her hand drifted down to her belly. She was approaching eight weeks now, in two weeks time she would have an appointment and they'd tell her when she was due. Dixie felt the little rounded part of her belly, it was definitely getting bigger, she wouldn't be able to keep it from everyone soon. When she knew her due date she would inform the trust that she was pregnant, she was going to stick to the plan of working on the crew until she was five months pregnant and then she would tell them that she was taking herself off active duty. She wanted the baby to be safe, she would miss working on the crew but it was better for the baby if she was out of the stressful environment of the station and being Duty Manager.

Jeff watched Dixie lying on the sofa, she looked quite peaceful, he was just glad that she was resting and not rushing around doing things. He wanted her to start taking it a bit easier, he could see her belly was becoming more and more rounded as the weeks passed and she got further into her pregnancy. Jeff knew that Dixie wouldn't slow down unless someone slowed her down, he hoped that she would keep her promise to work for ambulance dispatch when she got to five months pregnant. He would be happier when she was off the crew and working in a safer environment. Jeff thought about the scan that was coming up, he wondered if they would be able to find out the sex of the baby. All he was really bothered about was that both Dixie and baby were healthy, part of him wanted a little girl and the other part of him wanted a little boy.

Dixie felt her headache easing, it was getting better, the painkillers that Jeff had brought her were working their magic. 'Dixie, are you feeling any better?'

'Very much, thanks Jeff.'

'Good, you know that I'd do anything for you, don't you?'

'Yeah, I do.'

'If you need anything then you know where I am.'

'Of course I do.'

'I just want you to know.'

'Jeff, what has brought this on?'

'Nothing.'

'Jeffrey, you know that you can't lie to me, come on, out with it.'

'It is just everything with Lucy and the kids, I don't want it to drive us apart.'

'Is that what you're worried about?'

'That and other things.'

'What other things?'

'That something might happen to you or the baby, what if we're on a dangerous shout and you get hurt, I'd never forgive myself.'

'Jeff, I promise that I will be careful, if anything dangerous happens then I will stay well out of it. Does that help?'

'A little bit. I don't want to lose either of you, or Sophia and John. You all mean the world to me.' Dixie sat up and hugged Jeff, she wished that he would stop worrying about her as it wasn't doing him any good.

Jeff relaxed into Dixie's arms, she was always so warm and loving, he wished that all of this with Lucy and the kids wasn't happening. That it could be easier for them, it had come at the worst time, he wanted to focus on Dixie and the baby but he was having to split his attention between work and everything that was going on in his life. 'Stop thinking.' Dixie's voice broke into his thoughts.

'I'm not.'

'You are, you tense up whenever you think of something stressful.'

'Do I?'

'You're doing it now, just relax.' Jeff felt Dixie's fingers tracing patterns over his back and he sighed, it felt nice and the tension he had been feeling in his muscles started to dissipate. 'That's it Jeff love.' Jeff listened to the sound of Dixie's voice and let it soothe away the stresses and strains of the day. He marvelled at how relaxed he was feeling now, being in Dixie's arms felt wonderful.

'You know Dixie, if we could bottle the feeling from one of your hugs then we'd make a fortune.'

'You're a strange man Jeff Collier.'

'But you love me.'

'That I do.'

'I love you too princess.' Jeff felt a lot better, Dixie always knew how to make him feel better, her hugs were magical, they could make anything better.

Dixie sent Jeff upstairs to make sure the kids were in bed, it was the school holidays so she was letting them stay up a bit later than usual but she still thought it was important that got enough sleep and it was getting a bit late now. Sophia and John were very good at going to bed when they were told to, there were times when they would start getting ready without being told to. She loved having them here even though it was a bit difficult right now. Getting a new place to live was next on the list, staying here wasn't a good idea as this place was just too small. Sophia was getting older and she needed a room of her own, she was getting close to puberty and it was important for a girl of her age to have her own room. Dixie wondered what Sophia knew about what was about to happen to her, maybe she should have a chat with her, she would run it by Jeff first but she was sure that he would be okay with it.

Jeff came back down to see Dixie still lying on the sofa, she looked a little bit tired. 'How is your headache?'

'It has gone.'

'Good, glad to hear it princess.'

'Jeff, what do you think Sophia knows about growing up?'

'She asked me how babies were made once.'

'Did she, what did you tell her?'

'Just the basics, I don't know how I'm going to tell her about the rest though.'

'Leave it to me Jeff, I'll talk to her.'

'Will you? Thanks Dix, I wouldn't know where to start.'

'I know, men aren't exactly the authority on periods.'

'She needs to know, I would hate for her to be surprised by it all.'

'Don't worry Jeff, I'll sit her down one day and we'll have a girlie chat.' Jeff was happy that he had Dixie, she was good for Sophia, easily the best person to talk to her about growing up.

Dixie untangled herself from Jeff's arms. 'I think I might go to bed, I seem to be needing more rest lately.'

'That will be the baby, they're doing a lot of growing at the minute I bet, slowly becoming a little person.'

'He or she is about the size of a raspberry right now.'

'They won't be that size for long, soon you'll start showing Dixie.'

'I know, I'll be the size of a whale.'

'You'll be even more beautiful than you are already Dixie. You've already got the glow of a pregnant woman.' Dixie smiled, it made her feel good that Jeff thought she was beautiful.

'Thank you.'

'My pleasure. I can't wait to see you grow with our child in your belly, then to feel him or her kick and eventually to welcome them into the world.'

'When I start to feel kicks then you'll be the first to know.'

'I really want to feel them kicking and moving.' Dixie gave Jeff another smile, she was pleased that his mood had improved, they had a lot to look forward to in the future. They had been blessed with a child and though things were a little difficult right now, there was plenty to be grateful for in their lives. 'Come on handsome, take me to bed, I want cuddles from my wonderful husband.' Dixie held out her hand to Jeff and he stood up, took the hand that she held out and kissed it. Dixie laughed and leaned her head on Jeff's shoulder, she felt his arm slip around her waist and hold her close. She turned out the light on the way out of the room and smiled, she really wanted to spend the night in Jeff's arms with his hand resting on her belly. Even now he was protecting their child, Jeff was a brilliant dad and she loved him dearly. 'I love you Jeff.'

'I love you Dixie.' Dixie allowed herself to be taken to their bedroom, there was so much hope for the future, she found herself smiling, they had plenty to look forward to and they would face it all together.


	23. Chapter Twenty-Three

**Author: Raven Shadowrose**

**Rating: M  
**

**Pairing: ?/?**

**Summary: Sequel to Epiphany, Jeff and Dixie are trying to have a baby, what happens when it is likely to be more difficult than they first thought?**

**Disclaimer: I do not know or own any of the characters from Casualty, any original characters and the story are my property and I do not give permission for either of them to be used.**

**A/N: This is a direct sequel to Epiphany, please read that first to understand this story :) Reviews are welcome :)**

******************************Thank you to BeethovenRIP and chan. nelson4444 for your reviews, I hope you enjoy this chapter **

* * *

**Chapter Twenty-Three.**

Jeff didn't know how Dixie had managed everything, she'd convinced the school to let them have a look around during the holidays and to sign the kids up quickly. He'd always known that Dixie could be very convincing and she'd proved it with the way that she dealt with the headmaster of the school. She had been amazing and practically him eating out of the palm of her hand and falling over himself to give her everything that she wanted. They'd ordered uniforms for both the kids from the shop and they would be delivered to the store for them to pick when they were ready. Dixie had everything organised, he was grateful, he wouldn't have made it through any of this without her.

Jeff closed the door behind him, he'd taken Little Abs for a walk, Dixie was busy preparing for the move, they'd found a house that suited their needs and as it was new they didn't need to do much to it. Jeff was happy that they didn't have to do much decorating, they would have to sort out the nursery but he would do that in his spare time, he didn't want Dixie near any chemicals or paint that could harm her or the baby. He'd been getting more protective of her lately, she was getting bigger and the bump was more noticeable than ever before now. Dixie was growing quickly, it didn't seem all that long since they had found out she was pregnant. He remembered that day very well, getting the call from Tamzin and finding out that Dixie was in hospital because she'd collapsed. He'd been so worried about her, that something bad had happened to her. He was relieved when he found out that she had just fainted and there was nothing seriously wrong with her. It had turned out well and they'd found out that they were going to have a baby. Jeff vowed that he would protect Dixie and their baby no matter what.

Dixie hummed to herself as she packed the things into boxes that they didn't need, they would be moving into a new house at the weekend, she'd managed to arrange cover for both herself and Jeff for a couple of days and was very grateful to Tamzin for stepping into her shoes once again. She went through the mental list of things she had to do before the move went ahead. There was plenty to do, in between work and looking after the kids she was getting as much done as she possibly could. She picked up the box and put it in the corner with the rest of them. 'Dixie, what are you doing? I thought you were going to wait until I got back to start packing.'

'I just wanted to get a head start, we have a lot to do Jeff.'

'I know that, but you're not supposed to be lifting things.'

'It was just a small box Jeff, what's got into you?'

'I just don't want anything to happen to you or the baby.'

'I'm pregnant, not ill Jeff.'

'Exactly, you're pregnant, you need to be careful.'

'I am being careful, I'm leaving the bigger boxes to you.'

'I'd rather you didn't lift anything.'

'So you want me pregnant and barefoot, sitting down and letting the menfolk do all the work for me? Maybe I should give up working too, stay at home and have tea on the table ready for when you come in from work, is that what you want?'

'Is there a right answer to that question?'

'I don't know why you don't trust me, what do you think that I'm going to do, do you honestly think that I would endanger our baby?'

'No, I don't think that.'

'Then stop being so overprotective.'

'Overprotective? I just want to look after you Dixie.'

'I am an independent woman Jeff, all of this is making me feel stifled.'

'So, what, you don't want me to care for you? Would rather that I didn't care or show any interest?'

'That's not what I'm saying.'

'What are you saying Dixie?'

'You're wrapping me up in cotton wool again, I want you to trust me and to trust that I can look after myself and our baby.'

'Fine.' Dixie sighed, Jeff was very stubborn and he was reacting in completely the wrong way to what she had said to him.

Jeff busied himself with moving the rest of the boxes, the ones that Dixie didn't have the time to move before he had come back. He didn't understand why Dixie didn't want him to protect her and the baby, he was only doing what he thought was best for the both of them. 'I do trust you Dixie but I want to protect you too, you're not alone Dixie. That's all I meant. Pregnancy is hard on women and I just want to help you, to support you through this.'

'I know you do but I can lift small boxes Jeff, nothing is going to happen to me or the baby because I picked a small box up.'

'Are you sure?'

'Yes, I'll stay away from the bigger boxes though. You've got to let me do things, there's still almost seven months to go and I will go mad if you don't let me do anything for myself.'

'Aren't you already mad Dixie?' Jeff readied himself for the slap from Dixie but it never came.

'Cheeky sod, I'll give you mad.' Jeff couldn't help himself, he laughed and then Dixie laughed as well.

'I mean it though, just be careful, please Dixie.'

'I will, I won't let anything happen to our baby.' Jeff hugged Dixie close to him, he hadn't meant to make Dixie mad or upset her, he was just concerned that she would get hurt, he hoped that she understood that he just wanted to take care of her.

Dixie went upstairs to check on Sophia, John had gone outside and was playing football with Jeff, she knocked on the door and went in. 'Hello Sophia, how are you?'

'I heard you and daddy arguing earlier.'

'We weren't really arguing, we just had to talk something through.'

'Daddy used to say that all of the time, he would tell me that they weren't really arguing and then we had to go away and leave daddy here.'

'That's not going to happen again, I love your daddy Sophia, he just gets very protective and sometimes it drives me a little mad.'

'My daddy loves you Dixie and I love you too.'

'I love you too Sophia, don't worry, I promise you that me and your dad are not going to split up.'

'Really, you promise?'

'Yes, nothing is going to make me leave your dad.'

'Okay.' Dixie put her arms around Sophia and hugged her, she was sorry that the kids had heard the argument between herself and Jeff, they'd been through enough.

Jeff sat with John, they'd been playing football in the garden. 'Dad, do you love Dixie?'

'Yes, very much.'

'Did you love mum too?'

'Yes, I did.'

'Mum is different now.' Jeff just listened to John talk, it was rare that he shared his feelings with anyone so Jeff didn't want to interrupt him. 'She used to be okay, then mum and Alan started arguing all the time, she was mean to us too. She started saying things like you weren't our real dad and Alan was our dad, they'd argue about that a lot.'

'What else happened?'

'She'd say that Sophia was too much like you and she needed to stop her being like that, she needed to change her and make her different, it used to make Sophia feel bad. There were times we would stay together in my room and just hug while they were arguing. I did my best to protect Sophia dad, just like you asked me to.'

'I'm proud of you for that, you're with me and Dixie now and we will protect you both.'

'I tried to stop mum from hurting her, I really did.'

'How do you mean hurting her?'

'There were times when mum would go to hit Sophia, Alan would stop her most of the time and I would stop her too. She would get mad at me but I didn't care.' Jeff struggled to contain his anger, he was glad that John was talking to him and opening up about what happened with Lucy, he didn't want his son keeping it all inside. He was angry at Lucy, how could she even think of laying a finger on the kids?

Dixie and Jeff sat on the sofa after putting the kids to bed, it had been a hectic day sorting out things for the move and their little argument hadn't helped. Dixie was glad that she had made it up with Jeff, she cuddled up to Jeff and put her head on his shoulder. 'Penny for your thoughts Jeff.'

'It's nothing.'

'Come on Jeff, I know it is not nothing.'

'John told me that Lucy used to try and hit Sophia.'

'Oh, those poor kids, they've been through so much. I could never lay a hand on any child.'

'I know Dixie, you're a wonderful person, our baby, Sophia and John are so lucky.'

'They're lucky to have a wonderful daddy too.' Dixie wondered how much more stuff Jeff would have to put up with, how many more things John and Sophia hadn't told him. Pushing the kids to tell them everything wasn't a good idea, it would come out when the kids were ready to talk. She vowed to make herself available whenever they needed to talk to her.

Jeff took comfort from having Dixie so close to him, he needed her by his side, she was his rock during this time and he was grateful that she was with him. 'I love you Dixie, you know that, right?'

'Of course I know it. I love you too, we might have little arguments from time to time but it doesn't mean we don't care about each other.'

'I'll try not to be too overprotective in future.'

'I think I overreacted a little bit, you were just trying to take care of me and our baby and that's never wrong.' Jeff kissed Dixie's head and held her close, he groaned when the phone rang. 'Ignore it Dixie.'

'We can't, it might be important.' Jeff let go of Dixie and she answered the phone, he watched her speak to whoever it was and then held the phone out. 'It's for you.'

'Who is it?'

'It's Alan.'

'What does he want?'

'I don't know, he wants to speak to you.' Jeff took the phone from Dixie and held it to his ear.

'Hello.'

'Hello Jeff, I need to speak with you.'

'What about?'

'It's Lucy, there's no easy way to tell you this.'

'Tell me what?'

'She tried to kill herself, I went back to talk to her and found her in the bathroom, she'd taken a lot of tablets and a bottle of vodka.'

'Where is she now?'

'She's in hospital, they think that she is going to be okay after they've pumped her stomach.' Jeff didn't know what to say. 'They're looking at sectioning her as she keeps saying that she wants to die. The psychiatric team have been down and they arranging for more tests to see what is wrong with her but they seem to think that she has bipolar disorder.'

'Oh, right.'

'I'll keep you informed with everything that happens.'

'Thanks Alan.'

'I have to go but I'll call back when I know more.' Jeff listened to the dial tone purring in his ear, just how much more was he going to have to put John and Sophia through?

Dixie heard everything, she put her hand on top of Jeff's and squeezed it. 'Jeff love, are you all right?'

'I don't know, how am I supposed to feel?'

'I can't tell you that Jeff.'

'What am I going to tell the kids?'

'You can just tell them that their mum isn't very well and is being looked after in hospital, they don't need to know what she tried to do.'

'Should I wake them?'

'No love, let them sleep, we can tell them tomorrow.'

'You're right.'

'Come on love, you need to sleep, we have a shift tomorrow.' Dixie felt for Jeff, he really was going through a lot at the moment, she took his hand in hers and shut the light off in the lounge, she hoped that Jeff would be able to get a little bit of sleep.

Jeff lay in bed, why had Lucy tried to harm herself, he had known something was wrong, she had been weird the last time they met. Was there something he could have done to stop her? Jeff sighed, how was he going to tell John and Sophia? He wasn't sure how to feel, should he be sad, angry, hurt, upset? He looked up as Dixie came into the room in her pyjamas, she climbed into the bed and he just looked at her. 'Come here love.' Jeff moved into Dixie's arms, he moved his hand to Dixie's belly and left it there. His emotions were frayed, he sighed again, sometimes life was just too hard. 'Jeff you need to rest, please try and sleep love.'

'Just hold me Dixie.'

'I will.' Jeff felt Dixie's hand rubbing soothing circles across his back, she always knew how to calm him and make him feel a bit better. Sleep was coming to him, he was powerless to resist it.

Dixie made sure that Jeff was asleep before she closed her eyes, her main concern was the kids and Jeff and she was going to be there for them during all of this. Jeff was going to need her support when telling the kids about all of this tomorrow, she hoped that he would be able to get through the working day. Dixie knew that Jeff was stressed out and it was those times that he found work hard and he was likely to lose his temper with someone. Dixie held Jeff in her arms, she would be there for him, she wouldn't leave him alone or let him struggle through this difficult time.


	24. Chapter Twenty-Four

**Author: Raven Shadowrose**

**Rating: M  
**

**Pairing: ?/?**

**Summary: Sequel to Epiphany, Jeff and Dixie are trying to have a baby, what happens when it is likely to be more difficult than they first thought?**

**Disclaimer: I do not know or own any of the characters from Casualty, any original characters and the story are my property and I do not give permission for either of them to be used.**

**A/N: This is a direct sequel to Epiphany, please read that first to understand this story :) Reviews are welcome :)**

******************************Thank you to BeethovenRIP, olivia. c. king1 and chan. nelson4444 for your reviews, I hope you enjoy this chapter **

* * *

**Chapter Twenty-Four.**

Dixie sighed, the past couple of days had been very difficult, Jeff had told the kids that Lucy wasn't well, she'd stayed by his side and held his hand as he had told them. He hadn't told them what she had tried to do, only that she was unwell and the doctors were looking after her in hospital. Dixie admired Jeff's strength, he was being so strong through all of this. Alan was keeping them informed of any developments in her condition. Dixie wasn't sure what to think, Jeff was staying quiet over the whole thing, what he was feeling was a mystery to her. She'd tried to get him to tell her but he just clammed up, she'd resigned herself to waiting until he was ready to tell her. Dixie busied herself with putting Sophia's clothes in her new wardrobe, Jeff had banned her from putting the beds together, she was humouring him and doing as he asked. He would occasionally let her hold a bit while he put it together but that was all she was allowed to do.

Jeff checked the screws holding John's bed together, he didn't want it falling to pieces when John slept in it. He'd done the same with Sophia's bed too, he was glad that they had their own rooms, it wasn't healthy for them to share now that they were getting older. Having work to do helped him keep his mind off Lucy and what she had done, he was still feeling guilty, he should have known that she wasn't right, was he really that blinded by his hatred of her? Jeff got up and put the mattress on the bed, he was going to have to talk about this sooner or later but he didn't want to stress Dixie out. Dixie was pregnant and she needed to stay as relaxed as possible. He was doing all of the heavy lifting, he'd got the removal men to put the boxes and furniture in the right rooms but there were a few that had been put in the wrong place so he was shifting them about. His main concern was getting all of the beds put together, he wouldn't have Dixie sleeping on the floor while she was pregnant. He'd already put their bed together, shifting the furniture about into the right places within the room could wait until tomorrow.

Dixie sat on Sophia's bed, her clothes were away and the furniture was in mostly the right places. Dixie was relieved that they'd had the carpets fitted before they moved in. Sophia put her head around the door and Dixie looked at her. 'Hi Dixie, are you tired?'

'A little bit, it has been a long day for us all.' Dixie hugged the little girl when she sat down on the bed. 'Is daddy okay, he's been very quiet.'

'Of course he is, he's just had a lot to think about lately.'

'Is it about mum being in hospital?'

'A little bit, she is being looked after though, there is nothing to worry about.'

'I'm more worried about daddy, he seems sad.'

'Don't worry Sophia, your daddy is fine.'

'Okay, I'll give him an extra big hug later.'

'Good girl, why don't you go and find your brother and see what he would like for tea.'

'I will do.' Dixie watched Sophia jump off the bed and go to find John.

Jeff was putting the covers on their bed when Dixie came in. 'Oh, you've found the bedding, that's good, I thought we were going to be sleeping on a bare bed.'

'Yeah, I found it.'

'Jeff, is everything all right?'

'I don't know what you mean.'

'I've just told Sophia that her daddy is all right, I've convinced her and now you're going to have to convince me.'

'I'm just tired, that's all.'

'You're going to have to do a better job than that Jeff.'

'All right, it is everything with Lucy. I should have known that something was wrong with her Dixie, I'm a paramedic, I would have noticed that something was wrong in anyone else.'

'Jeff, blaming yourself is not going to do you any good.'

'Then who do I blame?'

'This is just something that happened, it is nobody's fault.' Jeff knew that Dixie was right, it wasn't really anyone's fault but blaming himself felt like the only course of action.

Dixie just looked at Jeff, it seemed as if he was determined to blame himself for every bad thing that happened in the world. She was determined not to let Jeff keep blaming himself. Dixie put her arms around Jeff and lay her head on his shoulder. 'Dixie, what are you doing?'

'Hugging you, is that a problem? You have some good things in your life Jeff and you need to remember that. Those kids of yours downstairs for a start, Sophia is beautiful and John is turning out to be a gentleman, you should be very proud of them.'

'I am proud of them, I always have been.'

'Then there is our baby.' Dixie put Jeff's hand on her belly. 'We have the scan on Monday.'

'I know, the baby will look like a baby by now.'

'Yes, he or she will.' Dixie felt Jeff's hand stroking her belly. 'Jeff, will you do something for me?'

'Anything princess.'

'Stop blaming yourself, please try, for me.'

'Okay, I'll try.'

'That's my Jeffrey.' Dixie was relieved that Jeff was going to try not to blame himself any more. 'Come on Jeff, the kids should have picked what they want to eat by now.'

'Do you want me to go out and get something?'

'Yes please love, the cooker is done but it has been a long day, I don't feel like cooking.'

'Put your feet up Dixie, I'll go and get whatever it is they've decided that they want.'

'You're a good man Jeff.' Dixie kissed Jeff and hugged him, she wondered how long the good mood he had acquired in the past couple of minutes would last.

Jeff took Dixie downstairs and made sure that she was sat on the sofa, they'd been busy all day and he wanted her to relax. 'Okay kids, do you know what you want to eat?'

'Fish and chips daddy, that's what we want.'

'Fish and chips Dix, is that okay with you?'

'Sounds lovely to me.'

'All right, I won't be long.' Jeff noted down what everyone wanted, he didn't want to forget anything. Jeff picked up his wallet and went over to Dixie and kissed her. 'I'll be back soon Dixie.'

'Take your time love.' Jeff smiled at Dixie and hugged the kids, he would try his best to keep his promise to Dixie that he wouldn't blame himself for everything that was happening.

Dixie hugged Sophia, John had gone upstairs to read his book, the young boy was still quiet but she hoped that he would come out his shell in time now that he had a more stable home life. Dixie made sure that John knew he could talk to herself or Jeff if he wanted to, that they would always listen to him. Dixie remembered that she had promised Jeff she would talk to Sophia about growing up, she thought that now was a good time. 'Sophia, did your mum ever talk to you about what happens to you when you grow up?'

'No, never.'

'Your daddy asked me to talk to you about it, is that all right?'

'Yes, I want to know what happens.'

'Your body knows exactly what to do, it is very clever and special. As you grow up your body will change, for instance you will need to start wearing bras as your chest develops. Hair will start growing under your arms and between your legs. Do you have any questions so far Sophia?'

'Will you take me to buy a bra Dixie?'

'Yes, when you need one.'

'What happens after that?'

'Your body will continue to change, you'll grow taller and gain a little weight, your hips will develop and your periods will start.'

'What's a period Dixie?'

'Every month your body releases an egg, that egg can make a baby, if that doesn't happen then the lining your body made to protect the baby breaks down and comes out in the form of blood.'

'Will it hurt?'

'It might hurt a little bit, sometimes your stomach muscles will ache as they are working harder than normal but you can take a painkiller for the pain.'

'How will I know when it is going to happen for the first time?'

'You might not know but when it does I will help you, your daddy and I will make sure that you have all the protection you need when your first period comes along.'

'Thank you Dixie.'

'You're welcome, is there anything else that you need to know? Any questions?'

'Not right now, if I have any then I will ask you.'

'Good, I am always here if you need to ask me anything.'

'I know, I hope daddy comes back soon, I'm hungry.'

'Me too Sophia.' Dixie hugged Sophia, she was quite pleased with how the conversation about growing up had gone.

Jeff put the bags down on the side. 'Dixie, I'm back.'

'Thank goodness, I am starving.' Dixie came through into the kitchen and looked at the bags on the side. 'It smells good, if I wasn't hungry before then I certainly am now.'

'Then I won't keep you waiting.' Jeff took some of the plates out of the box on the side and opened out the fish and chips onto them. 'Sophia, John, come on, food is ready.' Jeff heard the kids running down the stairs and into the kitchen. 'Take your plate of food and go into the lounge, you can eat in there for today but once the table is put up then we'll be eating in here.'

'Thank you dad,' John said and picked up his plate.

'Thank you daddy.' Sophia took her plate and followed her brother.

'You're welcome kids.' Jeff put his own chips onto his plate, Dixie was right, they did smell lovely and he was feeling hungry too.

Dixie heard her stomach growl, the smell of the food was making her feel very hungry, she followed Jeff into the lounge and joined him on the larger sofa. Normally she would have cooked but the move had exhausted her, there was still plenty of work to do but at least they had somewhere to sleep for the night. She didn't want to sleep on the floor as her back was aching and she had the odd twinge around her stomach area but that was due to her stomach stretching to accommodate her growing uterus. Dixie slowly ate her food, she wanted to enjoy it for as long as possible. Her feelings of nausea had been increasing lately, she felt lucky though, many people had a worse time with morning sickness than she was having right now. She was hoping that the feelings of sickness she was having would stop when she reached her third month.

Jeff put all of the plates in the sink when they had all finished, he was going to have to wash them by hand as the dishwasher wasn't ready yet. He left Dixie lying on the sofa, she was tired, it was a natural part of pregnancy, he would try and pick up some of the chores for a little while so that she could rest. He had hoped that they could leave moving until later on but the house had become available and they were offered it almost immediately. The move had been stressful but for the most part it had gone smoothly, they'd only really argued once when Dixie wanted to move something that he had thought was too heavy for her. Jeff knew that Dixie's hormones and the stress of moving were combining to make her irritable and prickly.

Jeff put the last plate on the drainer and went into the lounge. Dixie was sleeping on the sofa, she looked comfortable enough so he left her there. He put a blanket over her and kissed her on the head. Dixie wouldn't be able to sleep in their room just yet as the curtains hadn't been put up. Jeff quietly went upstairs, he would put the curtains up now, he really wanted Dixie in bed and resting. He picked up the curtains off the floor, attached them to the hooks and threaded them through the rings on the rail. Jeff checked the curtains were even and then drew them over, he was pleased with himself, Dixie would be able to sleep in their room now.

Jeff went downstairs and woke Dixie. 'Come on Dix, if you want to sleep then you can do that in our room.'

'I'm not asleep, just resting my eyes.' Dixie sat up and rubbed her eyes.

'Sure, you've never been able to convince me of that yet.'

'What time is it?'

'Just after nine.'

'I'll go to bed a bit later on, if I go now then I will wake up really early.'

'Okay, make sure you rest.'

'I will, stop worrying about me Jeff.'

'I know, you're an independent woman.' Jeff kissed Dixie on the head.

'Will you make sure the kids get to bed?'

'Of course I will, I'll be back soon.' Jeff kissed Dixie and went upstairs to help the kids get ready for bed, he couldn't wait to have the house in order and everything where it should be.


	25. Chapter Twenty-Five

**Author: Raven Shadowrose**

**Rating: M  
**

**Pairing: ?/?**

**Summary: Sequel to Epiphany, Jeff and Dixie are trying to have a baby, what happens when it is likely to be more difficult than they first thought?**

**Disclaimer: I do not know or own any of the characters from Casualty, any original characters and the story are my property and I do not give permission for either of them to be used.**

**A/N: This is a direct sequel to Epiphany, please read that first to understand this story :) Reviews are welcome :)**

******************************Thank you to BeethovenRIP and chan. nelson4444 for your reviews, enjoy the chapter :) **

* * *

**Chapter Twenty-Five.**

Dixie had got up early, it was time for the first proper scan of the pregnancy, they wouldn't be able to tell the sex of the baby just yet but Dixie was quite excited that she would be able to see the baby properly for the first time. Sophia and John were coming along, she wanted them to see their little brother or sister. She'd sat them down and talked them through what would happen at the appointment and then asked them if they would like to come along. Dixie was pleased that they had said yes, she hoped that they would be involved as much as possible. She'd spent some of the morning answering a lot of questions about her life and job and filling in forms with all of her medical details, talking about the operation she'd had to open her tubes up brought back a few memories and made her a little emotional but she was relieved that all of that was in the past.

Dixie thought back to the blood they'd taken from her so they could test it for anything that could harm the baby, Jeff had held her hand while they were taking it, she wasn't particularly good with needles, she'd looked the other way until it was all over. Her arm was a bit sore now, she always bruised easily when they took blood from her. They had given her a lot of information and told her to read through it, she had flicked through it while they were waiting for the scan and it all seemed to be about nutrition and taking care of herself, it wasn't really going in right now as she wanted to see the baby. Jeff looked as excited as she did about seeing the baby, he also looked tired, he had been doing a lot around the new house and would barely let her lift a finger to help him. Dixie had made some time to talk to Jeff later, she was going to get to the bottom of why he wouldn't let her help. She had an idea that it was because she was pregnant, her bump was becoming more visible every day and Jeff's over protectiveness of her was growing with it.

Jeff helped Dixie up when the midwife called her in, this was it, they were about to see their baby, he had been waiting for this moment since he found out that Dixie was pregnant. He saw her bump growing day after day, she was beautiful, Dixie's pregnancy was making her skin glow. He was keeping a check on her sickness, she had only been sick once or twice but she was feeling sick quite a lot of the time. He'd asked if it was normal for Dixie to be feeling sick as often as she was, he felt better now that he knew women often felt sick during the first few months of pregnancy and sometimes even after the first trimester. He held Dixie's hand as the midwife placed the gel on Dixie's stomach. 'This will feel cold and a little bit wet.'

'Okay.' Jeff heard Dixie gasp as the gel touched the skin on her stomach, he squeezed her hand and watched as the screen flared into life. The midwife moved the sensor over Dixie's stomach until she found the baby.

'There's your baby,' the midwife said and pointed at the screen. Jeff could just about make out the shape of the baby on the screen, they were still very small. Jeff looked at Dixie, she was staring at the screen and the baby.

'Dixie, are you all right princess?'

'They're so small, is the baby meant to be that small?' Jeff sensed Dixie's worry, she'd gone through so much to get pregnant, her worries were only natural.

'Don't worry, babies at this stage are only about an inch or two long, yours is growing at a nice rate.' Jeff heard Dixie breathe a sigh of relief and she squeezed his hand.

'I can see the baby moving Jeff.'

'I know princess.' Jeff turned to Sophia and John. 'Come and see your baby brother or sister.' He smiled as both of the kids looked curiously at the screen.

'What do you think?'

'The baby is so cute daddy, so tiny, is the baby a boy or a girl?'

'We don't know yet sweet pea,' Dixie said from the bed. 'We won't find out until the baby is bigger.' Jeff turned to John.

'What do you think of the baby, John?'

'It is tiny, did I look like that?'

'Yes, you were that small once. Do you think that you can look after the baby when he or she gets into the world?'

'Yes dad, I am going to be a big brother and look after the baby like I do Sophia.'

'That's my boy.' Jeff was so proud of his little family; Dixie for being so strong and Sophia and John for being so grown up.

Dixie watched the screen, the baby was moving about and quite active even if they were still very tiny. She loved the baby already, now that she had seen them it was all more real for her. 'All right, we're going to check the heartbeat now.' The midwife pulled up a different section on the screen and moved the sensor, Dixie heard the heartbeat of their baby pulsing out from the machine. Dixie was starting to feel herself tearing up, seeing their baby for the first time had made her feel very emotional. 'Nice and strong, just what we like to hear.'

'How far ahead am I?'

'Ten and a half weeks. I'm going to book your next appointments now, we'll want to see you again at sixteen weeks and then at twenty-five weeks. After that we will determine how often we are going to see you as your pregnancy progresses.'

'Okay, if I have any questions can I call here at any time?'

'Yes, our number is on the card I will give you. Where are you planning on giving birth?'

'In this hospital if that's okay.'

'That's fine, I'll put it down in your notes.' The midwife made a note and then she looked at another sheet of paper. 'Your blood test came back clear and your blood pressure is normal, try to stay out of stressful situations if you can help it and relax after work. Try to put your feet up for a little while if you feel stressed. Your weight is good for your height, try to stay active to avoid too much weight gain during pregnancy. There is something information in the pack you have been given, I have included details of antenatal classes in the area if you would like to attend them. Are you planning to breastfeed?'

'Yes, I hope that I can.'

'Excellent, there is some information for you about breastfeeding in the pack. Do you have any questions?'

'Can we have a picture of the baby?'

'Certainly, I'll print some off for you.' Dixie wiped the gel off her stomach and pulled her top back down as the midwife printed off the pictures. She let Jeff help her down off the bed and into her coat, she took the pictures off the midwife and a little card with her appointments on it. 'These are your next appointments, if there is a problem with them then let us know, we'll see you again soon.'

'Thank you.' Dixie linked arms with Jeff, seeing the baby had made her happy, it was all beginning to feel very real now.

Jeff saw the effect that seeing the baby had had on Dixie, she had definitely been emotional, he had felt it too, their child was growing safely inside Dixie's womb. Sophia had been typically enthusiastic about the baby and John had made him proud, he had come to recognise that his son was just quiet and thought deeply about a lot of things. Jeff opened the car and let John and Sophia get in, he held the door for Dixie and then closed it once she got in. Jeff climbed in the car and checked that both Sophia and John had their seatbelts on. He secretly checked that Dixie had hers on too, he wanted them all to be safe.

Dixie was quiet, she wanted time to process everything that she had seen and heard during the appointment today. Then there was the discussion she was going to have to have with Jeff about him doing everything. The house was mostly in order now, she was forbidden from touching anything in the room that would be the nursery. Jeff had read that pregnant women shouldn't go near household paint so now she was banned from helping him decorate the room. She was going to have to talk to him and she hoped that he wouldn't take it badly. Dixie came back to herself when the car stopped and the kids got out, they ran around the back and into the garden. 'Daddy, we're going to go and play.' Sophia waved from the gate and followed John, Dixie smiled, it was rare for siblings to get on so well as well as Sophia and John did.

Jeff went into the house, he was met by Little Abs and he let the dog out to play with the kids. He sensed that Dixie was stood near him. 'Jeff, we need to have a talk.'

'What is it Dixie, are you all right?'

'That is what I'm talking about, every day last week you've worked really hard and not let me help you do anything. You're exhausted and still you won't let me help.'

'Everything is done now, the only thing that is left is decorating the nursery. I just have to put up the wallpaper and paint it with the colour we choose.'

'I want you to get some help with it, you're doing too much Jeff.'

'All right, if it puts your mind at rest.'

'It will do, you can't do everything all of the time Jeff, you're not superhuman.'

'All right, I still want you to take it easy though Dixie.'

'Of course I will, I promised.'

'Good, I'd really hate it if anything happened to you.'

'Nothing will happen to me, come here.' Jeff let himself be drawn into Dixie's arms, he felt reassured that she would take care of herself and their baby.

Dixie hoped that Jeff would calm down now that the house was in order, she sat on the sofa and Jeff joined her. She opened the booklet that the midwife had given her on antenatal classes. 'Do you think that going to some of these would be a good idea?'

'Sure, why not.'

'They do a class that both of us can go to.'

'That sounds good, it will help you put your mind at rest when you actually give birth.'

'That's going to be the scary bit, hours of contractions and pain.'

'You can cope with it Dixie, there's always pain relief if you need it.'

'I know, I'd like to be fully aware when our baby comes into the world though.'

'I don't want you to put yourself through any pain that you don't have to.'

'I'll see what happens when the time comes. Are we going to have Sophia and John in the room?'

'I don't know, it might be too scary for them, it is going to be hard enough for me to see you in pain.'

'We'll have to talk to them about it nearer the time.'

'That's probably wise, let them make their own decision about if they want to be in there.'

'They're sensible kids, if they want to be in there then I say we should let them, if it gets too much for them then they can leave.'

'That sounds like a plan to me.'

'That's the easy part, once I've given birth we'll have all the sleepless nights to deal with, are you ready for that?'

'Yes, I am, I would do anything for you and our baby.'

'I know you will, you're a good man Jeff. We will look after the baby together.'

'Of course we will, our baby is going to be the luckiest baby alive having a daddy like you.'

'He or she is lucky to have a mummy like you Dixie, I just hope they get more of their looks from you than me.'

'What do you mean?'

'I'll feel sorry for the kid if they end up looking like me.'

'Nonsense, you're a very handsome man Jeffrey Collier. Though I might feel sorry for them if they get your nose.'

'Hey! What's wrong with my nose?'

'It is a little on the big side.' Jeff pouted and Dixie chuckled, she was pleased that Jeff was relaxing with her instead of rushing around doing things all of the time.

Jeff looked at Dixie as she laughed at him, he tried his sad expression but she still kept laughing. 'I hope they don't get your gob Dixie, two people that don't know how to shut their mouth in the same house would be a nightmare.' Jeff laughed at Dixie's expression, that had stopped her laughing.

'You are going to be in so much trouble Mr Collier if you don't stop laughing.'

'I am so scared.'

'You will be, I will deny you sex for a month.'

'You wouldn't.'

'Oh yes I would.' Jeff looked at Dixie's smug expression and decided now would be a good time to shut up. 'You're learning Jeffrey,' Dixie said and laughed.

'I've had long enough to learn.' Jeff leaned in and kissed Dixie on the nose. 'I love you princess.'

'Love you too Jeff.' He held Dixie in his arms, he liked it when they laughed and joked together. 'Why don't you bring the kids in and we can have something to eat.'

'Good idea Dixie.' Jeff kissed Dixie and then went to get the kids in, he thought once again how much he loved his little family.


	26. Chapter Twenty-Six

**Author: Raven Shadowrose**

**Rating: M  
**

**Pairing: ?/?**

**Summary: Sequel to Epiphany, Jeff and Dixie are trying to have a baby, what happens when it is likely to be more difficult than they first thought?**

**Disclaimer: I do not know or own any of the characters from Casualty, any original characters and the story are my property and I do not give permission for either of them to be used.**

**A/N: This is a direct sequel to Epiphany, please read that first to understand this story :) Reviews are welcome :)**

******************************Thank you to BeethovenRIP and chan. nelson4444 for your reviews, more squishiness :) **

* * *

**Chapter Twenty-Six.**

Jeff sat with Sophia and John at the breakfast table, Sophia looked grown up in her uniform, he remembered when she was little girl and going to her first day at nursery. How quickly time had passed, the little girl that had held his hand was growing up and soon she would be a teenager. The years would pass just as quickly and then she would be a young woman, how would he handle that? What would he do when she got a boyfriend? Probably threaten to break his legs if he ever hurt her, Sophia would always be his little girl no matter how grown up she got. John was getting older, he'd grown so tall in the last couple of months, he was so proud of both of his kids and how they were turning out. He had high hopes for Sophia and John and would see to it that whatever they wanted to do in life they would have the chance and every opportunity that he could give to them. Then there was the new baby, still so small and yet a person with so much potential. He loved them all dearly, he felt so very blessed.

Dixie noted Jeff's quietness and she wondered if he was thinking about the kids, he probably was, the start of their first day at school was rapidly approaching. 'Sophia, John, please go upstairs and clean your teeth and make sure that you have everything you need in your bags.'

'Okay Dixie,' Sophia and John said together and then went upstairs, Dixie turned to Jeff when the kids had gone upstairs.

'Are you all right Jeff?'

'I'm not so sure Dix, what if they get bullied or don't make any friends, what if they make the wrong type of friend and get into drugs and alcohol?'

'Stop worrying, they're sensible kids Jeff and they take after you.'

'You're right.'

'Of course I am, I'm always right and don't you forget it.'

'I know, you wear the trousers.'

'Yes, I do.' Dixie put her hand on top of Jeff's. 'I mean it, they'll be all right, they'll come back at the end of the day and tell you that everything went fine.'

'Of course they will be all right, I'm just worried about them Dix.'

'You're their father, it's your job to worry.' Dixie hugged Jeff and gave him a small kiss, it was only natural that he was worried about Sophia and John on their first day at a new school.

Jeff was glad that he had the day off, he wanted to be there for the kids when they went into school and again when they came home. It was their first day and it was important to him that he was there for them so they could talk about how the day had gone. The kids came running down the stairs when Dixie called to them, they were carrying their school bags and Dixie made sure that they were wearing their warm coats, the year was beginning to turn cold and he wanted to make sure that the kids were warm enough when going anywhere. He was going to have to check that they had hats, scarves and gloves, he would buy them each a set if they didn't. Jeff pulled on his own coat and locked the door once everyone was out of the house, he went to the car and found Dixie sat in front of the steering wheel already, she had taken advantage of having the keys to the car so that she could drive. He smiled, it was always a race to see who got into the driver's seat first, he realised that both himself and Dixie acted like big kids but it made life fun.

Dixie started the engine of the car, the kids were quiet and so was Jeff; she wasn't sure who was more nervous about the day ahead. She drove carefully towards the school, they had left in plenty of time so there was no rush. 'Are you looking forward to your first day John?'

'Yes, I am.' Dixie had been trying to get John to talk to her more, she hoped that by asking him questions he would open up to her more and eventually start talking by himself. Sophia was naturally talkative and John was quiet, Dixie sometimes wondered if John was sometimes shadowed by Sophia's natural personality. 'What are your favourite subjects?'

'English, maths and history.'

'English was always my favourite subject, I was better at it than maths.' Dixie smiled, she was making progress with John, he was readily answering her questions and listening to her when she spoke. It would take some time before John started talking to her by himself but she was patient and she wasn't going to give up on him. Jeff had told her that John liked her, it meant a lot to hear it, it gave her hope that John would become a bit more talkative in the weeks to come.

Jeff listened to Dixie and John talking, he noticed that his son was coming out of his shell, it was slow progress but Dixie was working her magic by paying attention to him and every word that he said. She listened carefully and took him seriously, Dixie was treating John like a grown up and he was responding to it. It pleased Jeff to hear John say that he liked Dixie, he rarely volunteered any information but it was happening more lately. Jeff hoped that being at school and surrounded by boys of his own age that he would make some friends and start to socialise. 'All right everyone,' Dixie's voice entered his head and he looked at her, he had been so lost in thought that he hadn't even realised that they had stopped. 'It is time to go.' The school looked quiet but it was still early, he went into the grounds with Sophia and John, Dixie followed them and he felt her take his hand.

They were met by a teacher inside the doors. 'Hello, you must be new.'

'Yes, Sophia and John Collier.'

'I am Mrs Cartwright, the deputy head. What year are they in?'

'Seven and nine.' Jeff saw the woman scan down her list.

'Yes, here we are, welcome to you both, now if you will follow me.' Jeff turned to Sophia and John.

'Okay kids, enjoy your first day, come here.' Jeff hugged Sophia and John, he was finding it hard to let them go but he had to.

'See you soon daddy.'

'See you soon Sophia, my little princess.'

'See you later dad.'

'See you soon John.' Dixie hugged the kids too and they went with the deputy head. Jeff stood with Dixie and they watched them until they couldn't see them any more.

Dixie felt for Jeff, letting the kids go was hard for him, she was proud of him and she hugged him once they reached the car. 'What was that for?'

'I know how hard that was for you, come on Jeff, let's go home.'

'It was hard, do you think they will be all right?'

'Yes Jeff, they will be fine.

'I hope you're right Dixie.' Dixie put her hand on Jeff's knee and squeezed it gently.

'Do you remember what I told you earlier when you said that to me?'

'That you're always right.'

'Yes, I did, stop worrying, for me.'

'Okay princess.' Dixie hoped that Jeff would be reassured by her words and would start to feel better soon, she cared for the kids too and hoped that they would have a great first day.

Jeff's thoughts somehow always went back to the kids, how they were enjoying their day and if they had made any friends yet. He was trying to focus on the wallpaper in the nursery, Dixie was banned from the room as he didn't want her to see what he was doing to it just yet. She'd quite happily agreed to let herself be surprised, he just hoped that her impatience wouldn't get the better of her before it was ready. He was very pleased with his idea, it was perfect, he couldn't wait until the baby was in there and making use of the room he was preparing for his or her arrival. Tamzin had been helping him, she would smuggle him the materials that he needed when Dixie wasn't looking. There was plenty of work to do, once the walls were painted then he would have a carpet fitted and the furniture put in, he was determined that their baby would have only the best furniture for their nursery.

Dixie was glad that Jeff had something to focus on other than worrying about the kids, the nursery was his little project, she had seen Tamzin bringing him paint every so often and she pretended that she hadn't seen anything. She didn't know what colour he was painting things or what furniture he had planned to buy for the baby but she trusted him completely. Dixie knew that the nursery would be beautiful, Jeff would see to that, she also knew that he would be the best dad that their baby could hope for. Her belly was definitely visible now, she was reaching twelve weeks, she was going to have to start buying maternity clothes soon. The thought didn't thrill her; she had visions of herself in pink and ruffles and she shuddered, pink really wasn't her colour. Maybe she could go up a clothes size instead.

Jeff stood back and admired his work, the nursery was beginning to take shape now, he loved it and he hoped that Dixie would love it too. He put the paintbrush down and carefully sealed the paint tin, there was still quite a bit of work to do but he was seeing his vision take shape. He looked at his watch, it was almost time to go and pick up the kids. He couldn't wait to hear about their day. Jeff went downstairs and found Dixie lying on the sofa. 'Are you all right Dixie?'

'Yes, don't worry about me, I've just had a little bit of heartburn, that's all, it is easing now.'

'Are you sure?'

'Yes, I'm sure, it is all part of pregnancy.'

'Okay.' Jeff sat by Dixie's side and put his hand on her belly, he stroked it gently and kissed her. 'Do you want me to go and pick up the kids?'

'Would you love? I'm a little tired, I think I'll have a lie down.'

'All right princess, don't worry, I'll get them, you go and have a little nap.'

'Thanks Jeff.' He kissed Dixie on the head and stood up.

'I'll be back soon princess.' Jeff smiled at Dixie and left the house, he hoped that she would get some rest while she could.

Dixie lay on the bed and moved her hand in circles over her belly, she wondered what the baby was doing, whether they were asleep or awake, moving or still. In two months time she would take herself off active duty, she wasn't looking forward to it, she lived for the excitement that being a paramedic brought. She also lived for helping people, she was going to have to help people in a different way when she reached five months. She yawned and turned onto her side, it was getting uncomfortable to sleep on her back and front, her side was definitely more comfortable for sleeping on right now. Dixie lay on Jeff's pillow, his scent calmed and relaxed her, she closed her eyes and breathed deeply, sleep soon overcame her, she needed the rest.

Jeff smiled as he drove the kids home, they had filled him in on their day at school, he was relieved that they had enjoyed it and they seemed to be settling in well at the new school. He was so proud of them and how they were taking everything in their stride. 'Daddy, where's Dixie?'

'She's sleeping, she needs to rest.'

'Is the baby making her tired?'

'Yes, the baby is doing a lot of growing and it makes Dixie tired.'

'Can we make something to eat for Dixie when she wakes up?'

'Of course we can my little princess.'

'We can make it together, can't we daddy? You, me and John.'

'Yes, indeed we can. Would you like that John?'

'I would like that very much.'

'That's my boy.' Jeff smiled, he loved that Sophia and John were so considerate and caring.

Once he got home Jeff quietly went into the room he shared with Dixie, she was fast asleep on his pillow and hugging it. Jeff smiled and gently kissed Dixie on the head, she stirred but did not wake. 'My beautiful princess, rest well.' Jeff sat and watched Dixie for a few more minutes, he carefully placed a blanket over her so that she would be warm and comfortable. Jeff left the room and went downstairs, he was looking forward to helping Sophia and John make something to eat for Dixie when she awoke.


	27. Chapter Twenty-Seven

**Author: Raven Shadowrose**

**Rating: M  
**

**Pairing: ?/?**

**Summary: Sequel to Epiphany, Jeff and Dixie are trying to have a baby, what happens when it is likely to be more difficult than they first thought?**

**Disclaimer: I do not know or own any of the characters from Casualty, any original characters and the story are my property and I do not give permission for either of them to be used.**

**A/N: This is a direct sequel to Epiphany, please read that first to understand this story :) Reviews are welcome :)**

******************************Thank you to BeethovenRIP, olivia. c. king1 and chan. nelson4444 for your reviews, squishy time, enjoy. **

* * *

**Chapter Twenty-Seven.**

Dixie sat on the sofa, Jeff had woken her up earlier to have something to eat, he'd been cooking with the kids for her, it touched her that he had cooked so that she didn't have to. The smell of food was making her stomach grumble, she was pleased that she was feeling less sick these days. Sophia was sat with her while Jeff was finishing off the tea in the kitchen with John, she had a feeling that Jeff had told Sophia to look after her. 'Dixie, I liked my first day at school.'

'Did you? What did you do today?'

'They took us all into the big hall and split us into our forms, they gave us diaries to put our homework into and our timetable of classes.'

'Can I have a look?'

'Of course you can Dixie.'

'Thank you sweet pea.' She took the timetable off Sophia and looked through it, the usual lessons were there and a few that she didn't recognise. 'Citizenship?'

'They said it is where we learn about human rights, crime and the media and so on.'

'I see, that's a good thing to learn about. Did you meet anyone nice today?'

'I did, Jessica and Sally are on my table in form, I quite like them.'

'Good, I am glad that you've met some nice girls. I am sure you will meet more of them in the weeks to come.'

'I hope so, I start my proper lessons tomorrow.'

'What are you first lessons?'

'Maths, English, music and food tech.'

'Are you looking forward to it?'

'I think so, I hope my teachers are nice.'

'I am sure they will be. What was the food like?'

'It was lovely, I had a jacket potato with tuna and then apple crumble afterwards.'

'Good, it sounds much nicer than my school meals. Fish stew and semolina pudding.'

'Ew, that sounds horrible.' Dixie laughed and put her arm around Sophia, she kissed her on the head, Dixie hoped that the little girl would have a good day tomorrow.

Jeff put the beef steaks he had bought onto the plates, he had read that beef was good for pregnant women as it kept their iron levels up and he didn't want to take any chances after Dixie had collapsed at the start of being pregnant so he was making sure that she was getting enough iron and vitamins in her diet. He added carrots and new potatoes. 'John, is the gravy ready?'

'Yes dad.'

'Very good.' Jeff took the pan from John and poured the gravy over the food on each plate. Will you go and get Dixie and your sister for me?'

'I will do.'

'Thank you John.' He transferred the plates to the table and put the glasses of water in the middle, he checked that he had enough cutlery for everyone too. Once John brought Dixie and Sophia into the room he went to Dixie and helped her sit down at the table. 'Tuck in Dixie.'

'Thanks for doing this Jeff.'

'No problem princess.' Jeff squeezed Dixie's hand and started to eat his own food. 'Do you have any homework John?'

'Yes dad.'

'What do you have to do John?' Dixie was persevering with her questions and getting John to talk.

'I have some maths and English to do but that is all.'

'What do they have you doing?'

'Addition and subtraction. I have to write about what I did in my holidays too.'

'That sounds interesting, what are you going to write about?'

'I thought I would write about swimming and going to pizza hut with you and dad.' Jeff smiled, it was nice to hear John talking so freely with Dixie.

Dixie listened to John talking, it was clear that he had enjoyed going swimming and to pizza hut, she listened to everything that he said and smiled at him. He really was turning out to be a lovely young man with proper manners, she hoped that he would keep those qualities as he got older. It pleased her to see that Sophia and John ate all of their dinner, they really were good when it came to eating at the table and having proper meals. It was nice to sit down as a family and talk through the day while they ate. 'Dad, Dixie, please may I go and do my homework?'

'Of course you can John.' Dixie smiled and watched John leave the table, as he was growing up he was getting to look a lot like his dad. Sophia finished off her food and then looked between Dixie and Jeff.

'Daddy, can I go and watch TV?'

'For a little while but you must go to bed early as you have school tomorrow.'

'Okay daddy, thank you.' Sophia quickly jumped up and left the room, Dixie found herself alone with Jeff again.

Jeff started putting the dishes into the dishwasher and he noticed that Dixie was still sat at the table. 'Are you all right Dixie?'

'Yeah, just tired. I'm starting to feel like a bloated whale. I've got quite a large belly for twelve weeks gone, some people on the pictures I've seen have small bellies.'

'You look beautiful Dix, you're glowing.'

'Do you really mean that?'

'Yes, you're so very beautiful Dixie.'

'Thanks Jeff, it means a lot to hear you say that.'

'Come here my love.' Jeff hugged Dixie and then helped her to get up from the table. 'Let me get the dishwasher on and we can go and relax for a little while.'

'All right.' He smiled at Dixie and then pressed the button to start the washer.

Dixie was having a hard time right now, she was growing bigger every day and had noticed the odd stretch mark near her belly. She had started massaging moisturiser into her belly but the marks were still appearing. It helped her to know that Jeff thought she was beautiful and wasn't put off by her growing belly. Sophia had gone upstairs to watch her telly, they'd got each of the kids one when they moved in on the promise that they would go to bed on time. She sat down on the sofa and curled her legs up, Jeff came in shortly after and sat next to her. 'I'm going to have to start wearing maternity clothes soon Jeff, everything about me is getting bigger.'

'Indeed, some things more than others.' Dixie felt Jeff squeeze her breast and she clouted him around the head. 'Ow! What was that for?'

'You know what that was for Jeffrey.'

'Because I squeezed your breast? I like them normally but now they're bigger I like them even more.'

'That was for being a typical male, show a man boobs and they lose their head.'

'Not any boobs Dixie, just yours.'

'You're going to have to share my boobs when the baby arrives, feeding will come first.'

'I know, I remember it well with Sophia and John. Sleepless nights and early feeding, endless crying and changing nappies.'

'I know, are we truly prepared for this Jeff?'

'We will be, you're the strongest woman I know, if anyone can do this then it is you. I'll be with you Dixie and we'll look after the baby together.'

'We will Jeff. Do you think all maternity wear is pink and full of ruffles?'

'No, I tell you what, we'll go shopping together and pick out some things that you will be comfortable in.'

'Okay, then there's baby clothes too, we'll have to start buying those soon.'

'I know, there's a lot to prepare.' Dixie cuddled up to Jeff again, he might be a bit on the grabby side where her boobs were concerned but he was a good man. It made her feel good that he found her sexy though.

Jeff put his hand on Dixie's belly, it was his favourite position for it these days, he wasn't going to make the mistake of grabbing Dixie's breast again as her slaps hurt. It was true that he thought Dixie was beautiful while she wasn't pregnant and even more so when she was. 'Jeff?'

'Yes Dix.'

'Do you mind that I'm too tired for sex these days?'

'Not at all my princess. Your body has more important things to focus on.'

'I know, with any luck that will end soon and we should start to be able to make love again.'

'Don't push yourself Dixie, I can do without for a while.'

'I am glad to hear that, just as long as you don't mind.'

'I don't, I'd rather you be resting anyway, pregnancy is hard on women and I can go without sex, it is not the end of the world.' Jeff pulled Dixie closer, her and the baby were two of the most precious things in his life.

Dixie let herself snuggle into Jeff's arms for a little while longer, she liked it there, it was warm and reminded her of safety, she always felt secure in his arms. 'We should tell the kids that they have to be in bed now.

'Yeah.' Dixie slowly stood up, she found when she stood up too quickly that sometimes it made her feel dizzy and a bit unsteady so she was taking it easier when she had to move. 'I'll go to Sophia and see if she wants her hair brushing.'

'I am glad you are bonding with the kids Dix, it makes me happy.'

'Me too, are you going to John?'

'Yes, I'd like to talk to him some more about his day.'

'Don't keep him up for too long Jeff.'

'Don't worry, I wont.' Dixie climbed the stairs, she sensed that Jeff was stood behind her, it was comforting to know that he was there just in case she did lose her balance.

Dixie went to Sophia's room and knocked on her door. 'Come in.'

'Hi Sophia, do you want me to brush your hair?'

'Yes please Dixie.' Dixie sat down on the bed and picked up the brush, Sophia had already changed into her pyjamas, she looked as if she was about to fall asleep.

'You look tired Sophia.'

'I feel a bit tired.' Dixie gently ran the brush through Sophia's hair and concentrated on getting the knots out. 'Dixie, can I ask you something?'

'Of course you can sweet pea.'

'Will my mum be all right?'

'Yes, with the right treatment she will be just fine. Alan told us yesterday that she was doing well, remember?'

'I remember. I like it here with you and my daddy, do I have to go back to London?'

'Not if you don't want to, you can stay here if you want to.'

'That's good, I want to stay here.' Dixie finished brushing out Sophia's hair and placed the brush carefully on the side.

'Have you brushed your teeth?'

'Yes, I have.'

'Good. Get into bed, sweet pea.' Dixie pulled the covers back and tucked them in once Sophia was comfortable.

'Dixie, I love you.'

'I love you too Sophia, goodnight lovely.'

'Dixie, can I call you mummy?' Dixie looked at Sophia, she wasn't sure how to answer, Sophia still had a mum, what would Jeff think if Sophia suddenly started calling her mummy?

'I don't mind you calling me that but let me talk to your dad and see what he thinks, perhaps you could call me mummy Dixie as you still have a mum.'

'Mummy Dixie, I like that.' Dixie smiled, it amazed her how Sophia wanting to call her mummy made her feel warm and so very loved. 'Will you sit with me until I fall asleep?'

'Of course I will.' Dixie held Sophia's hand in hers and stroked it while the young girl was falling asleep.

Jeff sat on John's chair while his son was getting ready, he'd looked over John's homework and he was so proud of how intelligent his son was. It made him smile when he read John's story of swimming and pizza hut, it was clear from his words how much he had enjoyed the day. John came back in and got into bed. Jeff went over to John. 'Goodnight dad.

'Goodnight John, you will look after your sister for me won't you, I'm trusting you to take care of her at school.'

'Don't worry dad, I'm looking out for her.'

'That's my son, I am proud of you, I just hope that you know it.'

'I do know it. Dad, is mum okay?'

'She will be, the very best doctors are helping her.'

'Good. Dad?'

'Yes John.'

'Sophia wants to call Dixie mummy.'

'Oh, did she tell you that?'

'Yes, outside of school when you were coming to get us.'

'Okay, I'll talk to Dixie about it.'

'Thanks dad.'

'No problem, get some sleep, you have a busy day tomorrow.'

'I know.' John turned over and Jeff turned out the light before leaving the room.

Dixie met Jeff coming out of John's room. 'Sophia's asleep, I think we need to have a chat Jeff.'

'Is it about Sophia wanting to call you mummy?'

'Yes, how did you know?'

'John told me.' Dixie followed Jeff into their room. 'What do you think Dixie?'

'I said I would talk to you about it, she still has a mum Jeff.'

'I know princess.'

'I said that she could call me mummy Dixie if that's all right with you.'

'Mummy Dixie suits you, I don't mind her calling you that if you don't mind.'

'I don't mind, I really like it in fact.'

'Good, I don't think we should tell her no, she cares for you Dixie and we should allow her to express that.'

'I think so too.'

'Then it is settled, now Mrs Collier, get yourself ready for bed, you look dead on your feet and we have work tomorrow.'

'Yes sir.' Dixie chuckled and started to get changed, her family with Jeff was starting to take shape and she was feeling very happy, she wasn't even feeling that bad about wearing maternity clothes any more.


	28. Chapter Twenty-Eight

**Author: Raven Shadowrose**

**Rating: M  
**

**Pairing: ?/?**

**Summary: Sequel to Epiphany, Jeff and Dixie are trying to have a baby, what happens when it is likely to be more difficult than they first thought?**

**Disclaimer: I do not know or own any of the characters from Casualty, any original characters and the story are my property and I do not give permission for either of them to be used.**

**A/N: This is a direct sequel to Epiphany, please read that first to understand this story :) Reviews are welcome :)**

******************************Thank you to BeethovenRIP and chan. nelson4444 for your reviews, I really enjoy reading them. I hope you enjoy the chapter :) **

* * *

**Chapter Twenty-Eight.**

Dixie sat in her office, she was about to phone the ambulance trust and let them know that she was pregnant; she would have to do it before she reached fifteen weeks so it may as well be now. She curled the phone cord around her fingers and waited for someone to pick up. 'Hello, Holby ambulance trust.'

'Hello, can I speak to someone from human resources please?'

'What is it regarding?'

'I need to inform someone that I am pregnant.'

'Please hold.' Dixie tapped her fingers on the surface of her desk and winced at the tinny rendition of Greensleeves that was currently playing down her ear, it really wasn't helping her headache. Dixie wished that they would hurry up and answer the phone.

'Hello, human resources, Emma speaking.' Dixie vaguely remembered that this was the woman she had spoke to about her operation when she needed to book time off to have the operation and then recover.

'Hello, this is Kathleen Collier from Holby.'

'How can I help you?'

'I am calling to inform you that I am twelve weeks pregnant.'

'Congratulations, I will need to take some details from you if that is all right.'

'Thank you, of course it is.'

'Are you planning to go on light duty or remove yourself from active duty?'

'If it is possible I want to go to work at the ambulance dispatch when I am five months pregnant.'

'Okay, when are your next scans?'

'The fifth of October and the seventh of December.'

'All right, you can have time off for those. When will you be looking to start maternity leave?'

'I wish to take the rest of my annual leave at the same time, starting on the twenty-third of January and start actual maternity leave on the twentieth of February.'

'Will you be wanting to take the full year?'

'Yes, I will be doing.'

'All right, I will have a information pack sent out regarding the rates of pay you will receive whilst you are on maternity leave.'

'Thank you.'

'Do you have someone in mind to cover for you while you're away?'

'Yes, Tamzin Bayle will be covering for me.'

'All right, I have all of the information that I need for now, if we need to know anything else then we will contact you directly. Do you have any questions?'

'No, not at the moment.'

'Very well, take care Kathleen.'

'You too.' Dixie put the phone down, she had done it, there was no going back now, she felt as if she was being put out to pasture but she was taking herself off active duty for the baby, she would always put him or her first.

Jeff too had babies on his mind, two months was a very long time for Dixie to be working on the crew, what if something happened to her or the baby in that time? Their job could be very dangerous at times and he worried every day that they might get caught up in something that could cause harm to either Dixie or the baby. He was probably worrying over nothing but the worry was in his mind a lot these days, what if they got called out to the Farmead Estate? The people on that estate wouldn't hesitate to hurt Dixie if they decided to, the fact that she was pregnant wouldn't matter to them. He started to trace patterns across the top of the table with his fingers, he had picked up the habit from Dixie and now couldn't get rid of it. Jeff was so engrossed in his thoughts that he didn't notice Tamzin open the door and come into the room. 'Jeff, are you all right?'

'Oh, Tamzin, I didn't hear you come in.' Tamzin joined Jeff at the table and drank some of her coffee.

'Is everything all right, you seem very distracted.'

'It's just Dixie and the baby.'

'What's wrong?'

'She won't go and work for ambulance dispatch until she is five months pregnant.'

'You want her to go sooner, don't you?'

'Yeah, I just want her and the baby to be safe.'

'Have you told Dixie how you feel?'

'No, she reacted badly enough when I stopped her picking up a box that I thought was too heavy for her.'

'So, she's being her usual self then?'

'Yeah, stubborn and refusing to move on the point.'

'I'm sure she knows that you're just trying to look after her.'

'I suppose so, I really wish she would slow down though.'

'You really should tell her, maybe she won't react as badly as you think.' Jeff sighed, Dixie wasn't someone that took advice easily, even if it was good advice.

Dixie went into the changing room, she opened the box of uniform that had been delivered to her this morning. It was the first chance that she'd had to look at it. Dixie sighed, she didn't want to wear a bigger size but she had no choice, her belly was going to get bigger and she was already struggling to do up her trousers when she got dressed. She took off her current shirt and replaced it with the bigger one, it was a little on the big side but at least she would have room to grow into it. She changed her trousers too and buckled her belt around her waist, she felt more comfortable but knew that it would only be a matter of time before she was ordering another bigger uniform. She had enough sets of trousers and tops to keep her going for now, her only hope was that she didn't have to go up another size for quite a while. Dixie looked at herself in the mirror, the new uniform didn't look too bad, if people didn't look too close then they wouldn't be able to tell that her uniform was a bigger size.

Jeff went into Dixie's office only to find it empty, he wondered where she had gone, she hadn't told him that she was going anywhere. He was a little bit worried about her, she had collapsed before, what if something like that had happened again? Jeff forced himself to try and think logically, maybe she had just needed to go to the toilet or into another part of the station. He went to their ambulance, she wasn't in there, he knew that he was probably just being daft and that she was totally fine but he was really worried about her. He closed the doors to the ambulance and went to the changing rooms, she had to be there, if she wasn't there then he wouldn't know what to do. He pushed open the door and saw Dixie stood in there. 'Dixie, I thought you were supposed to be in your office letting the trust know about the pregnancy.'

'I was, I just came in here to sort a few things out.'

'I went to your office and you weren't there, I thought that something had happened to you or the baby. Why didn't you tell me where you were going?'

'I didn't think you needed to know every move that I am going to make in a day.'

'You're getting bigger every day Dixie and you need to be careful.' Jeff heard Dixie sigh, didn't she get that he was worried about her, that he wanted to take care of her?

Dixie couldn't believe what she was hearing, she thought that they had got past all of this, she had promised to be careful, what more did Jeff want from her? 'Jeff, will you stop treating me as if I'm just a baby bump, I feel like I'm a glorified incubator.'

'What do you mean?'

'I feel as if I've got a sign attached to me telling people to be careful as I'm pregnant. I'm still me Jeff, there's just a whole lot more of me now.'

'Exactly, there's not just you now, there's the baby too.'

'I know, I'm being careful and that should be enough for everyone but it isn't, I feel as if people are treating me differently and I don't like it.'

'It might be something that you have to get used to Dixie.' Dixie sighed, she didn't want to get used to being treated differently, why couldn't people see that she was still Dixie? 'Are you still going to ambulance dispatch at five months?'

'Yeah.'

'Have you thought about going earlier?'

'Earlier?'

'It would be safer for you and our baby.'

'Jeff, I am not going to be one of those women that sits around for her entire pregnancy and eats sweets all day, that is not the woman you married.'

'There's only so long that you can be action woman Dixie.'

'I know that, at five months I will go to work at dispatch and I'll probably hate every minute but I will do it. If I feel I need to go earlier then I will go earlier but I will be the one to make that decision.'

'Right, do I have any say in this?' Dixie knew that she was on shaky ground, she didn't want this to end in another argument.

'Jeff, I know that you care for both me and the baby and I appreciate that, I'm not saying that you shouldn't care but will you please see me as Dixie?'

'All right, if you promise to tell me that when you're going to go some place else.'

'Okay, that's fair, if I have to leave somewhere that I've told you I'll be then I'll let you know.' Dixie smiled at Jeff, she was relieved that they'd managed to have a civilised discussion about the pregnancy and taking it easy.

Jeff felt a bit happier now, Dixie wasn't going to go to the dispatch any earlier but she had promised to tell him if she was going to go somewhere else. He had been so worried when she hadn't been in her office. He looked closer at Dixie, something was different about her, something that he couldn't put his finger on, he looked again and then he realised exactly what it was. 'You've started wearing a bigger uniform.'

'How do you know? I thought that nobody would notice.'

'I know you Dixie, that is how I noticed.'

'It's not that much bigger, only one size.'

'Are you worried about it Dixie?'

'A little, I feel so very fat.'

'You're not fat princess, you're pregnant. Come here love.' Jeff held his arms open and hugged Dixie when she stepped into them. 'My beautiful Dixie, don't worry so much.'

'I'll try.'

'Good, we're going to go shopping at the weekend and find some maternity wear for you.'

'Please don't put me in pink.'

'As if I would do that.'

'I'm glad.' Jeff stroked Dixie's hair, there were a few little niggles here and there but mostly they were coping well with Dixie's pregnancy. She understood that he cared for her and was willing to meet him some of the way, it was a good start. Jeff hoped that once her second trimester started then Dixie's moods should even out and she'd be a bit more settled.

Dixie supposed she was going to have to get used to people treating her differently, her bump wasn't exactly something that she could hide from the people around her. She was trying to think of it as good that they cared enough to notice that she was pregnant and might need more help than usual. She was trying to limit the amount that she was lifting and doing, the midwife hadn't told her that she couldn't lift things but she figured that it was a good idea to take it easier. The one thing she would not put up with was people touching her stomach, she'd seen it before where random people would go up to pregnant women and touch their bump. There were certain people that were allowed to touch her; Jeff and the kids were allowed but she wasn't comfortable with anyone else touching her. Dixie liked that Jeff often slept with his hand resting on her bump, it made her feel safe and secure. If anyone else decided to just touch her that then they would get a severe telling off, her belly was not public property. Dixie smiled at the thought she could always tell them that she had swine flu or something similar. She was roused from her thoughts by her radio going off. 'Come on Jeff, no rest for the wicked, we have work to do.'

'Indeed we do princess.' Dixie linked her arm with Jeff's and they went to the ambulance together, she really was going to miss this when the time came for her to stop working as part of the crew.


	29. Chapter Twenty-Nine

**Author: Raven Shadowrose**

**Rating: M  
**

**Pairing: ?/?**

**Summary: Sequel to Epiphany, Jeff and Dixie are trying to have a baby, what happens when it is likely to be more difficult than they first thought?**

**Disclaimer: I do not know or own any of the characters from Casualty, any original characters and the story are my property and I do not give permission for either of them to be used.**

**A/N: This is a direct sequel to Epiphany, please read that first to understand this story :) Reviews are welcome :)**

******************************Thank you to BeethovenRIP, olivia. c. king1 and chan. nelson4444 for your reviews, I really enjoy reading them. I hope you enjoy the chapter :) **

* * *

**Chapter Twenty-Nine.**

Jeff was waiting outside the changing rooms for Dixie and Sophia, she had taken plenty of different pieces of clothing into the changing rooms with her. She had turned down quite a few things already, mainly anything in pink or anything that she termed too girly. He was beginning to realise that Dixie was quite fussy and that buying maternity clothes was going to be difficult for her. He had resigned himself to being in for a long wait while Dixie figured out what she wanted. Jeff sat with John while Dixie was trying on clothes, they were playing games like hangman and tic-tac-toe while they waited in an attempt to stop them feeling bored. It was nice to spend some time with his son, they'd had a bit of chat about the baby too. Jeff wanted to keep both Sophia and John involved with the pregnancy as much as possible.

Jeff didn't understand women and their need to go shopping, what did they find so entertaining about it? A man's way of shopping is better, men decide what they go in and get it from the first shop that they come to and that's that. Women go to all of the shops and then they go back to the shop that they first went into. Jeff sighed and looked at his watch, today was going to be a very long day, he wondered if Dixie had managed to pick anything yet. He drew another table for tic-tac-toe, maybe he would actually manage to win the game this time, John was proving to be a very worthy challenger.

Dixie stood in the changing rooms surrounded by piles of fabric on the floor, she hated shopping at the best of times and she hated it even more now. Why did most maternity wear have to be all girly and fluffy. She didn't want girly and fluffy, she wanted clothing in normal colours and without stupid slogans plastered across her chest. Dixie sighed, she didn't think that it would be this hard to buy something to wear. Did the designers think that all women immediately became into kittens and other fluffy things the minute they became pregnant? She took a deep breath and forced herself to think logically about the clothes that she was looking at. She hung the jeans up on the hanger on the back of the door as she was going to have those. Dixie turned her attention to the tops that she was looking at, she decided that she needed a second opinion. 'Sophia, come in here a minute.' She opened the door and let Sophia inside. 'What do you think of these tops.' She held up a blue one and a burgundy one for her to look at.

'I like them both but I like the blue one more, it matches your eyes, I like that one the best.'

'The blue one it is, thank you sweet pea.' Dixie put the blue top with the jeans and she added a triple pack of tops in black, grey and white. She had tried to keep the colours simple and without added designs. She was mostly happy with what she had, she had to wear something after all.

Jeff was still playing games with John when Dixie and Sophia came out of the changing rooms, she was holding quite a few items of clothing in her arms and he breathed a sigh of relief as it looked as if she had chosen something at last. 'Are you ready to go Dixie?'

'Yes, I've got most of the things that I need now.'

'Good, come on princess.' Jeff held Dixie's free hand as they waited in the queue to pay for her things, he made sure that the kids were with them, they had been very good whilst Dixie was buying clothes so he would treat them to something as a reward. Dixie put everything down on the counter and the woman scanned them all in, he handed his card over and put the pin number in. 'Jeff, I was going to pay for my things.'

'Don't worry princess, this is my treat, I want to do this for you.'

'Thank you Jeff.'

'My pleasure princess.' Once everything had been bagged up they left the store. 'Do you need anything else Dixie?'

'Some underwear.'

'All right, we'll go there next.'

'Why don't you take the kids to the food court and get us something to eat while I do this.'

'Are you sure?'

'Yes, I have to be measured and get some new bras fitted, will you get me something to eat, just something light because I'm feeling a little bit sick.'

'All right princess.'

'Thanks Jeff, will you take the bags too?'

'Sure, anything for my princess.' Jeff kissed Dixie on the cheek and took the bags from her, he headed off towards the food court with Sophia and John.

Dixie headed towards the underwear department, she had an appointment that she needed to keep, her bras were becoming more uncomfortable as her chest was growing bigger. She was gong to have to find herself some maternity bras to wear or else the rest of the pregnancy was likely to be unbearable. She went to the desk by the changing rooms. 'Hi, I'm Kathleen Collier, I have an appointment to be measured for a new bra.'

'You're right on time, come with me.' Dixie followed the woman into the changing rooms, she went into the one that she was shown to. 'If you take your top off for me then I'll be with you in a moment.'

'All right.' Dixie went into the room and locked the door, she took her top off and waited for the woman to come back. She opened the door when the woman knocked and let her in. 'Lift your arms for me.' Dixie did as she was asked, she was feeling a bit uncomfortable being half undressed in front of a strange woman but it would be over soon. 'Okay, you're a 38C. What size are you normally?'

'36C.'

'How far along are you?'

'Fourteen weeks.'

'You might find that you increase in size again before the end of your pregnancy.'

'Thank you, can I get dressed now?'

'Of course you can, if you need any help choosing a bra then let me know.'

'Thank you.' Dixie put her top back on and left the changing rooms, now that she knew what size she was she could find some more bras.

Dixie looked at the various bras that were in the maternity section, she was happy to see that there was very little pink in this section. She picked out some packs of bras and some knickers that would accommodate her belly and went to pay for them. She had chosen a few nice ones as she was starting to feel her sex drive returning and she wanted to feel confident when she was getting undressed in front of Jeff. She was into her second trimester now and she was hoping that in the next couple of days the sickness that she was feeling would start to disappear. She had already noticed that she was needing to go to the toilet less and the pressure on her bladder was lessening. Dixie picked up the bags off the counter and left the shop, she went to the food court and looked around for Jeff and kids. 'Dixie!' She heard Sophia shout her name and saw her waving, she smiled and sat on the spare seat at the table, she saw that they had started eating already.

Jeff made room for Dixie at the table. 'Did you get everything that you needed princess?'

'I did, yes, I think I will have enough for a while, unless I get bigger again.'

'I got you a ham salad sandwich, is that all right Dixie?'

'That's fine love, I just need a little something to keep me going.'

'Are you still feeling sick?'

'Only a little, it is getting better, I think I will feel all right once I've had something to eat.'

'Good, I am glad to hear that princess.' Jeff knew that every pregnancy was different and some women felt sick through the whole of their pregnancy but he hoped that Dixie wouldn't be one of them. It was good that she was starting to feel better so he was hopeful that the sickness would stop totally.

'What have you had to eat kids?'

'I had cheese and salad, it was lovely, I really liked it.'

'Good, I am glad you liked your sandwich Sophia.'

'I did, it was very nice.'

'What about you John, what did you have?'

'Tuna with cucumber.'

'Did you enjoy it?'

'I did, very much.'

'Good.' Jeff watched Dixie eat her sandwich, she seemed to be enjoying it which was a relief. Once she had finished he put all of the plates together and back onto the tray

'Does anyone want ice cream?' Jeff smiled as both Sophia and John said they wanted ice cream. 'What about you Dix?'

'I think I will have some.'

'Okay kids, go and get yourself an ice cream and me and Dixie one too.' Jeff handed the kids some money and sat with Dixie while they went to buy the ice cream.

Dixie was glad she was sitting down, her back was hurting a little bit and so were her feet, she was looking forward to the ice cream now that her appetite was coming back. 'Dix, do you think that we should go away for some us time before the baby comes?'

'Us time?'

'You know, some adult time.'

'Okay, we might have to do it before I reach the third trimester as I'm likely to be too tired to do anything then.'

'All right, I'll organise something, we'll have to figure something out for the kids too.'

'I am sure that Tamzin would look after them for us, she loves the kids so she wouldn't have a problem with it.'

'She probably would look after them for us.'

'I'll ask her tomorrow and see what she says.'

'Good plan Dix, how are you feeling?'

'I'm a bit tired and have sore feet but I'm okay.'

'You can sit down and put your feet up one we get home.'

'I'll hold you to that.' Dixie saw the kids coming back with the ice cream and she realised that she really was looking forward to it.

Jeff tucked into his ice cream, he noted that Sophia had got Dixie hers and that John had got him a mix of chocolate, strawberry and vanilla ice cream, it made him smile that John had remembered what he had chosen when they had all gone to pizza hut. He made sure that Dixie was eating hers and then he tucked into his own, he noted that she looked as if she was glowing even more now. He'd also noticed that she looked less tired these days, the second trimester should be easier for Dixie and that's why he wanted to go away with her so they could spend some quality time together. He knew that she would find it harder again during the third trimester and she would need to sit down and rest so he was going to make the most of the time they had together before she gave birth and the real work began. He knew that they would be tired nearly all of the time when the baby arrived, it was important that they made time for each other while they still could.

Dixie took her new things up to the bedroom when she got home, Jeff had driven them, she was glad as she was feeling a little tired, it was nice to be able to relax. She changed into her new underwear and put on the blue top that Sophia had chosen with one her new pairs of jeans. She pulled the top down and stared at herself in the mirror, she turned to the side and placed her hands on her belly. She turned to the other side and looked at herself, there was no denying that she was pregnant now. 'You look beautiful Dixie.' She turned to see Jeff stood behind her.

'How long have you been stood there?'

'Long enough to see you looking at yourself in the mirror.'

'Oh, I wonder if this top is really me.'

'Dixie, I mean it, you look beautiful and I can't believe that you don't think so.'

'Thanks Jeff.' Dixie went over to Jeff and hugged him, she put her head on his shoulder and took comfort from Jeff's arms holding her close. It made her feel good that he thought she was beautiful, she just stood there in Jeff's arms and let him hold her. She closed her eyes and hugged him back, she breathed in his scent and relaxed, he reminded her of home and comfort.


	30. Chapter Thirty

**Author: Raven Shadowrose**

**Rating: M  
**

**Pairing: ?/?**

**Summary: Sequel to Epiphany, Jeff and Dixie are trying to have a baby, what happens when it is likely to be more difficult than they first thought?**

**Disclaimer: I do not know or own any of the characters from Casualty, any original characters and the story are my property and I do not give permission for either of them to be used.**

**A/N: This is a direct sequel to Epiphany, please read that first to understand this story :) Reviews are welcome :)**

******************************Thank you to BeethovenRIPand chan. nelson4444 for your reviews, I really enjoy reading them. I hope you enjoy the chapter, get your tissues out it is squishy time. **

* * *

**Chapter**** Thirty.**

Dixie closed her locker, she'd just finished a night shift with Jeff and she was feeling quite tired; she was going to have to think about working days from now on. She had another four weeks left working on the crew and she didn't think that working nights was going to be a good idea. She was due to do the next set of rotas so she would put herself and Jeff on days, he wouldn't mind as long as he could keep an eye on her. She quickly got dressed and met Jeff in front of the station. 'Dixie, are you all right?'

'Yeah love, I'm just a bit tired.'

'I'm not surprised, carrying our little one and working nights can't be good for you.'

'I know, that is why I'm going to work days from now until I finish working on the crew.'

'Good, I am glad to hear it princess.'

'I just want what is best for our baby and if that means no night shifts then so be it.'

'Come on princess, let's go and see what our baby looks like this time.'

'I can't wait to see him or her again.' Dixie slipped her arm through Jeff's and held onto it as they went into the hospital.

Jeff thought through his plans, everything was almost in place, Tamzin had agreed to look after the kids while he took Dixie to a hotel for some time to themselves. It was all arranged for this weekend, Dixie didn't know about it yet, he was going to pack some things for her and take her straight to the hotel. She had to think that everything was normal but he was dying to tell Dixie everything just so he could see her smile. He opened the door the ante-natal clinic and took Dixie's arm again and they went to the reception. The nurse behind the desk smiled at them 'Hello, can I take your name please?'

'Mrs Kathleen Collier,' Dixie said. She tapped it into the computer and then smiled at them again.

'Take a seat and we will be with you shortly.'

'Thank you, come on princess.' Jeff sat Dixie down and kissed her on the head, she really did look tired, he was going to make sure that she went straight to bed when they got home. 'Are we still going to find out the sex of the baby Dix?'

'Yes, that's what we agreed, I really want to know.'

'Me too.' Jeff felt Dixie's excitement about finding out the sex of the baby.

Dixie looked up when the midwife called her name, she stood up and went into the room with Jeff following close behind her. 'If you would like to sit down and we'll get started. I need to take your blood pressure first.'

'All right.' Dixie pulled the sleeve of her jumper up and relaxed as the midwife attached the cuff to her arm and inflated it. 'Okay, all done, your blood pressure is normal, just what we like to see.' Dixie was relieved, she had been a bit stressed out during the shift so she hoped that it hadn't affected her blood pressure in any way. 'If you would like to pop up on the bed for me and lift your top up.' Dixie let Jeff help her lie down on the bed, she'd starting letting him help her do certain things as a way of stopping him from worrying about her. It seemed to be working so far as Jeff's worrying was happening a lot less these days. If she was truly honest she quite liked Jeff helping her, it made her feel close to him. Dixie lifted her top up and rested her hands by her side. 'Same as last time, this will feel a little cold.' Dixie braced herself for the coldness as the gel was squirted onto her stomach, it was still a bit of a shock but she was ready for it this time.

Jeff held Dixie's hand as they watched the screen flicker into life, the baby coming into view almost instantly. 'There you are princess, our little one.'

'I know, he or she is a lot bigger this time.' Jeff looked at screen, he'd seen a baby growing twice already but every time he saw the baby growing bigger it filled him with awe. He looked at Dixie, she was staring at their baby as they moved around inside her belly. 'I'm just going to check the heartbeat.' Jeff squeezed Dixie's hand as the sound of the baby's heartbeat came through the machine. 'Nice and strong, that is very good.' Jeff was relieved, hearing the heartbeat was proof that their baby was growing strong and healthy. 'Do you want to know the sex?' Jeff looked at Dixie and she nodded, she hadn't changed her mind.

'Please, can you see if the baby is a boy or a girl?'

'Just one moment.' The midwife looked closely at the screen and she shifted her position a little bit. 'You're having a little boy.' Jeff felt Dixie squeeze his hand and he looked at her, she had tears in her eyes and they were filled with emotion, he hugged her and kissed her gently. 'We're having a beautiful little boy princess.' Jeff felt tears come into his own eyes, a little boy, he was so happy, he would have been just as happy if they were having a girl, he just hoped that their baby arrived healthy and safely.

Dixie hugged Jeff back, she was having a little boy, a son, she let a few tears fall, she was feeling quite emotional and she felt so very much closer to their baby now. She could start thinking of names and buying specific baby clothes. 'Would you like some pictures?'

'Yes, please.' Dixie wanted to remember the day that she had found out they were having a son, she took one last look at the screen as the midwife printed them some pictures and then let the woman wipe the gel off her stomach. She was still feeling very emotional and wiped a few tears away that were threatening to escape. 'I will need you to provide a urine sample before you leave as we need to check for protein. Something else that you will need to think about is if you want to have an anomaly scan at twenty weeks. We will fully check your baby for anything that might be wrong.' Dixie was tempted to say no but having the scan would put Jeff's mind at rest, she was trying to be sympathetic to his worries and needs as the father of their baby.

'Okay, I'll have one.'

'Excellent, I will get you an appointment sorted out.'

'Thank you.' Dixie took the pot from the midwife and went into the ladies room, she was feeling very happy, finding out she was having a son had made her day.

Jeff waited with the midwife for Dixie to come back. 'As the dad, is there anything that you would like to ask?'

'Dixie was feeling sick up until last week, is that normal?'

'For some women it can be, there are no proper rules to pregnancy as such. Some women barely get any sickness at all and some get a lot, if it returns then small, frequent meals should help.'

'Okay, thank you.'

'Anything else?'

'She gets quite moody and teary sometimes.'

'That will be the hormones, that is normal too. I suggest that you spend time together as a couple, warm baths will also help relax her and calm her down.' Jeff nodded, Dixie's hormones really did act up from time to time.

Dixie came back into the room a few minutes later and handed the midwife her sample, she waited as it was tested. 'No protein, that's very good. We'll keep testing you as your pregnancy progresses to make sure that everything is going as it it should. I have booked you in for the anomaly scan, here is the card with your appointment for the anomaly scan on it and your pictures, we'll see you again soon. Take care.'

'Thank you.' Dixie took the pictures and the appointment card and she held onto Jeff's arm as they walked back through the hospital and to the ambulance station where their car was parked. 'Dixie, Jeff!' She heard Tamzin shouting them as they appeared in the station. 'How did it go, did you find out whether you're having a boy or a girl?'

'We did.' Dixie smiled at Tamzin.

'Come on, don't keep me waiting.'

'We're having a boy.' Dixie handed Tamzin one of the pictures to look at.

'Oh, he's adorable, look at him, he's so cute. I am so pleased for you.' Dixie found herself enveloped in a hug by Tamzin.

'Hey, I'm here too.' Dixie laughed at the indignation in Jeff's voice and then smiled as Tamzin hugged him too.

'Come here daddy, I am so happy for you both.' She wondered how the kids would react when they were told that they're going to have a baby brother.

Jeff was still feeling the happiness from finding out that they were having a baby boy, he already had his eyes on a few toys and bears that he wanted to buy for the baby. 'Right Mrs Collier, upstairs, you need to get some rest. I'll be up in a moment.'

'You're not going to back down on that are you?'

'No, I'm not, go on up and I'll bring you a cup of tea.' Jeff put the mugs down on the side and put the kettle on. He was so very happy and started humming quietly as he made the tea. He was looking forward to telling Sophia and John about the baby, it would make them happy too. They had shown quite an interest in the baby and they were marking the days down on the calendar until the baby arrived. He was pleased that they were being so mature about it, he'd noticed that they would tidy up and do things around the house so that Dixie didn't have to. He picked up the mugs and carried them upstairs to Dixie.

Dixie lay on the bed with her hands on her belly, she was looking at the picture from the scan from time to time as well. 'Hello peanut, I'm your mum.' Dixie gently stroked her growing belly. 'You're the luckiest baby in the world because you have a daddy and a mummy that loves you and can't wait to see you. I promise you that you'll always be safe and cared for, I love you, my little boy. I've waited such a long time for you, I can't wait to hold you in my arms and cuddle you for the first time.' Dixie carried on stroking her belly, her and Jeff's little boy was safe in there and she vowed to keep him that way. She looked up at Jeff when he walked in the room, he carefully handed her one the mugs and she drank it gratefully. 'Thanks love.'

'My pleasure princess.'

'I've just been talking to our son.'

'Really, did he say anything back?' Dixie chuckled, she hoped that Jeff wouldn't lose his sense of humour.

'No silly, of course not.'

'What did you say to him?'

'That he's the luckiest baby in the world having a dad like you. What would you say to him?'

'Hello baby,' Dixie felt Jeff kiss her belly. 'I love you, your mummy and me, we can't wait to see you. I love your mummy too, she's a very special lady that is working hard to bring you into the world. You have a big brother and sister that can't wait to meet you too.' Dixie smiled as Jeff stroked her belly, it was nice to be close to him like this.

Jeff heard the door open and the kids coming in, it would be Nadia bringing the kids back from school. 'Do you want to tell the kids now Dixie?'

'Yeah, we can do.'

'I'll go and get them, wait here princess.'

'Thanks love.' Jeff kissed Dixie on the head and went downstairs, he was so looking forward to telling the kids about the baby.

'Hi Nadia.'

'Hello Jeff.'

'Thanks for bringing the kids back.'

'No problem, I will see you Monday evening, enjoy your weekend.'

'You too.' Jeff let Nadia out and then turned to the kids. 'Come upstairs with me kids, we have something to tell you.'

'What is it daddy?' Sophia sounded curious.

'You'll see soon, come and see Dixie with me.'

'Is the baby okay dad?'

'Don't worry son, the baby is just fine.' Jeff herded the kids upstairs to where Dixie was waiting for them.

Dixie sat on the bed as the kids came into the room, Dixie hugged Sophia when she climbed up on the bed next to her. 'Mummy Dixie, how is the baby?'

'The baby is very well, we have something to tell you.'

'What is it?'

'The baby in my stomach is a little boy, you're going to have a baby brother.' Dixie smiled at the kids, she wanted to give them a few minutes to digest the news that they had just received.

'Mummy Dixie, can I see the baby?'

'Of course you can sweet pea.' Dixie picked up one of the pictures and handed it to Sophia.

'He's so cute, can I keep this picture?'

'Of course you can Sophia.' Dixie looked at John. 'You're going to have a baby brother John, how do you feel about that?'

'Can I teach him to play football?'

'I'd like that, he will need you to look after him too, can you do that?'

'Yes, just like I do with Sophia.'

'Exactly like that. Would you like a picture too?'

'Yes please.' Dixie handed John one of the pictures, she was pleased that the kids were happy about the baby. 'Come here kids.' Dixie put one arm around each of the kids and hugged them close. 'Come here Jeff, come and join us.' Dixie made room for Jeff and he put his arms around all of them, she might not be related to the kids but she thought of them as family and she loved them as if they were her own children. She loved Jeff too, he was a wonderful man that had given her the gift of being a mother, Dixie thought again that she was so very lucky and blessed. She cuddled up to Jeff and kids, she felt loved and so very happy.


	31. Chapter Thirty-One

**Author: Raven Shadowrose**

**Rating: M  
**

**Pairing: ?/?**

**Summary: Sequel to Epiphany, Jeff and Dixie are trying to have a baby, what happens when it is likely to be more difficult than they first thought?**

**Disclaimer: I do not know or own any of the characters from Casualty, any original characters and the story are my property and I do not give permission for either of them to be used.**

**A/N: This is a direct sequel to Epiphany, please read that first to understand this story :) Reviews are welcome :)**

******************************Thank you to BeethovenRIP, olivia. c. king1 and chan. nelson4444 for your reviews, I really enjoy reading them. I hope you enjoy the chapter. I like this one, Jeff is a sweetie :) **

* * *

**Chapter Thirty-One.**

Jeff had been working on the nursery every moment that he had spare, he looked around the now finished room, it was perfect. He'd even managed to sneak a cot in when Dixie was still asleep one morning. It had been delivered to Tamzin's house and she had dropped it off, it had given him no end of trouble when he was putting it together but it was worth all the effort and hard work. He really hoped that Dixie would like it, he'd gone against the usual colour schemes that people chose when they were decorating a nursery and picked something quite different. He liked it in here, it felt warm and inviting. Jeff looked around the room, he wanted to make sure that everything was in place for when he brought Dixie in to see the nursery. It was missing things like toys and clothes for the baby but he wanted to buy those things with Dixie. She'd started knitting again, he'd noticed a few jumpers that she'd made in blue and a few in purple. He liked that it kept her occupied and took her mind off the fact that she would be coming off the crew soon.

Dixie was sat on the sofa, she was nearing five months now, the time when she would stop working on the crew. She had found that she wasn't moving as quick these days and carrying the medical kit and the equipment that she needed whilst on duty was becoming harder. Jeff took most of it, he was only letting her carry light things, she was quite grateful that he was protective of her sometimes. She was going to have to get used to being off the crew and working at the ambulance dispatch instead, it was going to be difficult but she would do it for the baby. Dixie had spent most of the day resting as she'd found it difficult sleeping lately, her bump was getting bigger and sometimes it was hard to find a comfortable position when she was in bed. Sleeping on her back and front was near enough impossible now and she wasn't used to sleeping on her side. She found that putting a pillow under her stomach helped a little bit and enabled her to get some sleep.

Jeff went into the lounge and went over to Dixie, he really wanted her to see the nursery, he was excited and nervous about her reaction. 'Dixie, come with me princess.'

'Where?'

'The nursery, I want you to see it.'

'Is it done?'

'It is.' Jeff took Dixie's hands in his and helped her to stand up, he had noticed that occasionally she needed help to stand up, he was relieved that she wouldn't be working on the ambulance soon. It was better for her and the baby if they were out of all that just in case anything dangerous happened on a shout. Jeff kissed Dixie's head and put his arm around her waist to support her as they went up the stairs, he didn't want anything bad happening to Dixie or the baby. Jeff stopped at the door to the nursery and put his hand on the handle of the door. 'Close your eyes princess, I'll guide you.' Jeff took Dixie's hands in his again once she had closed her eyes and he slowly walked her through the door and into the nursery.

Dixie heard the door close behind her and she knew that she was inside the nursery. 'Can I open my eyes yet?'

'Not yet, soon princess.' Dixie felt Jeff guiding her as she walked. 'Okay, you can open them now.' Dixie opened her eyes and looked around the room that she was stood in. The bottom half of the room was a light ivory colour and the top half had been painted in terracotta, the two colours were split by a black wooden rail that went around the middle of the walls. A sturdy black cot had been placed against one wall, it had already been made up with cot bedding that had elephants and giraffes embroidered into the fabric. At one end of the cot was the biggest teddy that she had ever seen. She turned around and saw a rocking chair with comfortable cushions placed on it and against the other wall was a bookcase, Jeff had already started putting books on it. She saw fairy tales and Mr Men and Little Miss books too. Next to the chair was a lamp, it would be ideal for when they were putting the baby to sleep, much better than the main light in the room. She saw a few shelves around the room and they had little animal ornaments on. A wind chime with crystal moons and stars hung in the window and cast rainbows around the room whenever the sun hit it. Dixie felt the tears in her eyes, the room was beautiful, Jeff had gone to so much effort and she was finding it hard to keep her emotions back.

Jeff just watched Dixie as she looked around the room, it was hard to judge her reaction as she had her back to him. 'Dixie?' Jeff put his hand on Dixie's shoulder. 'Do you like it princess?' He turned Dixie to face him and he saw the tears running down her cheeks. 'Is that good or bad?' Jeff pulled Dixie into his arms and held her close, he felt her arms wrap around his back and he kissed her head gently as he held her.

'Jeff,' he heard Dixie say a few moments later.

'What is it princess?'

'Thank you, the room is beautiful, it is so different to what I imagined it would be like and yet it is perfect.'

'I am glad that you think so, everyone seemed to be going for the same pastel coloured rooms so I thought we would be different.'

'I love it.' Jeff breathed a huge sigh of relief, Dixie loved the nursery, he had been so worried that she would hate it.

Dixie looked around the room again, she saw a small wardrobe and chest of drawers, she couldn't wait to start putting the baby's things in them. She also saw a small storage cabinet that she could put nappies and other essentials in. 'That also doubles as a changing unit so we can change him in here without having to disturb him too much.'

'You've thought of everything, haven't you?' Dixie was feeling overwhelmed, the nursery was amazing, she lifted her head from Jeff's chest and kissed him, he had done a wonderful job. 'I love you Jeff, thank you for this.'

'You're welcome princess, I love you too.' Dixie cuddled herself into Jeff's arms, seeing the nursery had really made her day.

Jeff was relieved that Dixie was happy with the nursery, he had taken quite a big risk in doing something that was different but it had paid off. 'We'll have to think of names next Dixie.'

'I know, we should get the kids involved, buy a baby name book and get them to make a list of their favourites.'

'That's a good idea, I'll pick one up for them.'

'I want them to be involved Jeff, as much as they want to be.'

'I do too princess.' Jeff kissed Dixie's head and held her close, he loved her and the kids and the new baby that would soon be with them. Dixie was almost half way through her pregnancy now, he was looking forward to all of the experiences that were yet to come; mostly he was looking forward to the moment that their baby entered the world for the first time. He couldn't wait to see Dixie holding their son, she would be a fantastic mother.

Dixie followed Jeff out of the nursery, when they were outside she moved close to him and kissed him, she loved the feel of his lips on hers. She kissed him again and moved closer to him, she had felt her libido returning in the past couple of days and kissing Jeff made her want more, she wanted to be close to her husband again. 'Jeff, I want you to make love to me.'

'Are you sure?'

'Yes, very sure, please Jeff, I want us to be close again.'

'All right, we might have to improvise a little bit though.'

'What do you have in mind?'

'You'll see.' Dixie felt Jeff take her hand and she followed him into their bedroom, she wanted this, now that her sex drive was back to normal she wanted them to make love like any other couple. Dixie waited while Jeff closed the curtains and when he came back she found herself in his arms again, he tilted her head up and kissed her gently; his tongue slipping into her mouth and tangling with hers. Dixie sighed quietly as Jeff's hands slowly started exploring her body, she broke away from the kiss when Jeff lifted her t-shirt over her head. 'Yours now.' Dixie copied Jeff's actions until he was stood bare chested in front of her. They slowly undressed each other until there wasn't any clothing left on their bodies.

Jeff helped Dixie to lie down on the bed, he lay next to her and then kissed her, his hand gently caressing her naked body. 'Lie on your side and face me princess.' Dixie looked confused but did as he asked her to. Jeff used his free hand to hold Dixie close to him, he felt Dixie's other hand settle on his back. He looked into her eyes and then kissed her. 'Love you princess.'

'I love you too Jeff.' Jeff held Dixie for a few more minutes and then he kissed her on the nose, he gently parted Dixie's legs and heard her gasp as he slipped into her body. Jeff looked into Dixie's eyes as he slowly moved inside her, the connection was intense and he loved it. He heard Dixie moan quietly, she was clearly enjoying herself. He moved his head to her neck and kissed her exactly where she liked it. Jeff stilled his movements and just enjoyed the feeling of being inside Dixie, he moved a few strands of hair out of her eyes and then kissed her again.

Dixie kissed Jeff back, she could feel him inside her and she felt complete. 'Princess, I'm going to lie on my back now.'

'Okay.' Dixie moved with Jeff as he lay on his back, she found herself sat on top of him with all of his length still inside her. She rotated her hips and heard Jeff moan in pleasure, he liked it when she did that. 'Like that Dixie, don't stop princess.'

'I wasn't planning on stopping.' Dixie moved her hips up and towards Jeff's body, she moaned when she felt his hand slide between her legs and start to stroke her clitoris.

'Come for me princess.' Her moans increased when his other hand moved up her body and played with her nipples. Dixie noticed her movements became erratic and her body tightened around Jeff's length, she moaned out loud and gripped the covers as orgasm overtook her. She heard Jeff moan her name and she tilted her hips again to bring him to orgasm. 'Dixie, my Dixie,' he moaned as he came inside her.

Jeff lay Dixie back on her side when they had finished making love, he stayed inside her as he didn't want to break their connection just yet. Jeff stroked Dixie's face and hair and then kissed her again. After a few moments he slowly pulled out of her and just lay with her. He didn't want to speak, their lovemaking had been perfect and he just wanted to lie with Dixie for a while. He saw Dixie smile at him and then she rested her hand on his hip again. They didn't need words, just being together was enough. Jeff picked up the blanket off the chair in their room and covered himself and Dixie with it, he wanted to make sure that she was warm.

Dixie kept her hand on Jeff's hip, his hand was on her arm and they were just looking at each other, she loved his eyes, they were the most gorgeous blue she had ever seen and she loved looking into them. Dixie was still thinking about Jeff's eyes when she felt something strange in her stomach, it took her a few seconds to realise what it was. She moved onto her back and then looked over at Jeff. 'Jeff, give me your hand.'

'Why, what is it princess?'

'Just give me your hand.'

'Okay.' Jeff looked confused but he did as she asked anyway, she placed his hand on her stomach. 'What is it princess?'

'Just wait.' Dixie left Jeff's hand on her belly for a few minutes and then she felt it again. 'Did you feel that?'

'Was that a kick?'

'Yes love, our little boy is getting more active.' Dixie smiled as Jeff's hand moved around her stomach, every so often the baby would kick and Jeff smiled each and every time. Dixie loved that Jeff was bonding with their baby, she was glad that he had the chance to feel their baby kicking. Dixie cuddled up to Jeff, they would have to get up and get dressed as the kids were due back from school in a few hours but for now they could just lie together.


	32. Chapter Thirty-Two

**Author: Raven Shadowrose**

**Rating: M  
**

**Pairing: ?/?**

**Summary: Sequel to Epiphany, Jeff and Dixie are trying to have a baby, what happens when it is likely to be more difficult than they first thought?**

**Disclaimer: I do not know or own any of the characters from Casualty, any original characters and the story are my property and I do not give permission for either of them to be used.**

**A/N: This is a direct sequel to Epiphany, please read that first to understand this story :) Reviews are welcome :)**

******************************Thank you to BeethovenRIP, olivia. c. king1 and chan. nelson4444 for your reviews, I really enjoy reading them. I hope you enjoy the chapter. I like this chapter, squishy alert! **

* * *

**Chapter Thirty-Two.**

Dixie looked around the ambulance station, it was her last day here and she was going to miss everyone while she was working at ambulance dispatch. She took the opportunity to walk around the station while it was still quiet and there were very few people around. Dixie wanted time alone with her thoughts and memories of this place. She was going to be working for ambulance dispatch for three months; that was a long time in her mind. How would Jeff cope without her? They'd never really worked apart before, he would be working with Tamzin and Dixie hoped that she would Jeff in line and stop him from doing anything reckless or stupid. Surely he wouldn't do anything now that she was pregnant with their baby, would he? She would have a word with him and talk to him about it, she wanted to know that he was safe while she wasn't working there.

Dixie pushed open the door to the rec room and let it close behind her, she sat at one of the tables and recalled some of the times that she had spent in here with Jeff and some of their colleagues. Polly and Cyd came to mind, she liked to think that Polly was looking in on her from time to time. Dixie wasn't sure that she believed in any form of an afterlife or heaven but she wanted to believe that Polly knew about the baby that she was carrying. Polly would have wanted to be an aunty to their baby, she would have been a great mother to her own children too but that chance was cruelly snatched away. Dixie sighed, she wished that they had found Polly sooner and she would still be alive and able to see the baby when he arrived. Was it silly to hope that Polly would be able to see him when he arrived? Dixie wondered about Cyd, what she was up to and if she was any different. She could get the number and call Cyd but something always stopped her, too much time had gone by and she didn't know what to say to her.

Jeff sat in the ambulance, Dixie had said she wanted some time alone to walk through the station one last time by herself. He wondered what he was going to do without her, being separated from her while she worked at dispatch was going to be hard. It was necessary to protect her and the baby, he would endure the separation from Dixie to make sure that she and the baby were both safe. Working with Tamzin wasn't going to be the same as working with Dixie but she was a nice enough woman and a talented paramedic. He was glad that Tamzin was in charge and Dixie hadn't asked him, he wasn't management material and he wanted to be able to go home to Dixie and the baby at the end of the day without worrying about reports that needed to be filed and other things that would be his responsibility if he was in charge. Tamzin was currently organising a little surprise for Dixie, it had been hard keeping everything a secret from her but he wanted her to have a nice last day and to know how everyone felt about her.

Dixie had moved to her office, she had brought a bag with her so that she could take her stuff home with her and then hopefully she could keep some of it on her desk at ambulance dispatch. Dixie packed her secret supply of chocolate that she hadn't touched since she got pregnant as the caffeine wasn't good for the baby. She went to the desk and packed away the photos of herself and Jeff, the one of Cyd followed and she wondered if she leave it at home from now on. Then came the one she'd had taken with Polly. Jeff had taken it for them, Polly was staring at the camera and Dixie looked at herself on it; she was pulling her tongue out at Polly. She smiled at the photo, that had been taken during happier times, she kept it on her desk to remind her of Polly and the friendship that they had shared. She still missed Polly and the light she had brought to this station, Dixie still felt guilty sometimes, Polly was too young to die. Dixie shook her head, there was no point in thinking like that, she could almost hear Polly telling her off and see her standing there with her hands on her hips looking very unhappy because she was beating herself up over what happened that day. Dixie carefully put the photo in her bag and zipped it up, she took one last look around the office and made sure that everything she owned had been put into the bag. Dixie took a deep breath and took the bag to her locker, leaving here was going to be very hard.

Jeff had gone to the rec room to talk to Tamzin for a little while but his mind kept wandering back to Dixie and the baby. The scan to test for abnormalities had gone well and their baby was healthy, he was so happy to hear that. He knew for sure that he would love the baby no matter what but he wanted him to be healthy, as long as the baby and Dixie were healthy then that was all that mattered. 'Tamzin, is everything ready?'

'Yes, the card is going around the staff as we speak, Nicola is taking care of it.'

'I think it will do Dixie good to know that everyone is thinking of her.'

'We are thinking of her and the baby, everyone is overjoyed that she's pregnant. You know as well I do that everyone in this station likes Dixie.'

'I know, I found that out the hard way when I said something stupid to her and everyone sided with Dixie, nobody spoke to me that day unless the had to.'

'Dixie does inspire that kind of loyalty, we're all going to miss her, especially you.'

'Yeah, especially me.'

'Don't worry Jeff, it won't be for long and you'll still see each other at home.'

'I know, I just wish that I could be around to keep an eye on her.'

'Dixie will be fine Jeff and so will the baby.'

'Yeah, you're right.' Jeff tried to be positive, being away from active duty meant that Dixie and the baby would be safe and he wanted that more than anything in the world.

Dixie went looking for Jeff, she was sure that something was going on, people were acting a bit strange around her. She always knew when something was going on in her station and right now something strange was definitely going on. 'Dixie,' she heard Jeff shouting her name from behind her, she turned to face him and he ran up to her.

'What is it?'

'Tess said she needed to see you, something about some paperwork that hadn't been completed properly.'

'Just what I need at the end of our shift, I'd rather go home and put my feet up right now.'

'Come on princess, we'll deal with this and then we can go home.'

'All right.' Dixie sighed, the last thing she needed on her last day was Tess chewing her out over some paperwork, sometimes she really hated being the boss.

Jeff didn't like lying to Dixie but it was necessary as he wanted her to be surprised, she was probably going to kill him when she found out what he and Tamzin had been up to but it would be worth it. 'Noel, where's Tess, she wants to see Dixie.' Noel was in on it all and he knew exactly where to send them.

'She's in the staffroom getting a coffee.'

'Cheers mate. Come on Dix.' Jeff hoped that everyone was ready, now that Dixie was here there was no going back. Tamzin was supposed to let them all know as he brought Dixie into the building, the staffroom door was closed and that was a good sign. 'Go on then princess, the sooner we get this paperwork stuff over with the sooner we can go home.'

'You're right.' Jeff stood back as Dixie opened the door, it was his job to make sure that she didn't run off as Dixie hated being the centre of attention.

Dixie opened the door and she was met with the sight of nearly all of the emergency department crowded in there. Dixie was aware that she had been set up, she turned to get out and saw Jeff stood behind her. 'Sorry princess, I am not allowed to let you leave.'

'Come on Dixie, you didn't think that we'd let you go without saying goodbye properly did you?' Dixie didn't know what to say or do, she hadn't expected them to do anything for her.

'Go on princess.' Dixie gave in and went into the room, Tamzin took her by the arm over to a table that had been filled with food and drink and a cake that was blue and had little stars and moons on it and a baby lying on a fluffy white cloud. Dixie felt herself becoming a little emotional, they had done all of this for her, she was grateful that they had. 'As we all know Dixie is going to be having a baby in a few months time, we all got together and bought you a few gifts.' Dixie stared at Tamzin, they had bought her presents? 'This is first.' Tamzin handed her a wicker basket and she looked inside it; there was a sleep suit, hat and mittens, a hooded towel, a pair of bunny slippers and a little cuddly rabbit for the baby.

'It's beautiful, thank you.'

'That's not all Dixie, there's more.' Dixie took the next package that Tamzin handed to her, it was a blanket and it felt lovely and soft. 'We thought you could wrap the little one in that when he is born.' Dixie was trying hard to keep back her tears but it was getting harder, she felt Jeff's arm move around her shoulder and squeeze it. 'This is for you and Jeff.' Jeff took the book that Tamzin handed to him. 'It's a baby book, you can document everything that happens and put pictures of him in there.' Dixie felt the tears slide down her cheek, she buried her head into Jeff's shoulder and tried to compose herself, she really hadn't expected that everyone would have done something like this for her.

Jeff sensed that Dixie was feeling emotional, he hugged her and kissed her head. 'It's all right princess.' He held Dixie close until she moved her head away from his shoulder and spoke to everyone gathered there.

'Thank you, all of you, I didn't expect anything like this. I know that thank you isn't enough but I am touched by all of the effort that you've gone to.' Dixie hugged Tamzin and slowly other people from the department moved forward to hug her too. Jeff took a few pictures on the camera, he had brought it with him specially so he could remember this occasion. Once Dixie had got over her shock and emotional moment she had started enjoying herself. He had taken a picture of the cake and gifts and of Dixie with everyone that he could.

Dixie was still feeling a bit stunned and overwhelmed, nearly everyone in the department had turned up at one time or another to wish her and Jeff well, the party was winding down now as people were having to go back to work and soon it was just Tamzin and Jeff left. 'Dixie, I wanted to give you this when everyone had gone, this is from me.'

'Tamzin, you've done so much already.'

'I know but I really want you to have this.' Dixie took the little package from Tamzin and shook it out gently. It was a baby blanket that had a cross-stitched pattern on it of Eeyore from Winnie the Pooh.

'Tamzin, did you make this?'

'I did.'

'Thank you, it's lovely, this must have taken you ages.'

'It did, but it was worth it.' Dixie hugged Tamzin, she was a sweet woman. 'There are some flowers and a card for you as well.' Dixie looked over in the corner where Tamzin was pointing and she saw a huge basket of flowers with some little blue roses in the middle. Dixie felt the tears in her eyes again.

'Dix, I'll start taking this stuff to the car.'

'Okay love.' Dixie took advantage of Jeff being gone to talk to Tamzin. 'You will look after Jeff for me while I'm away, won't you?'

'Of course I will, don't worry Dixie, I won't let him do anything risky.'

'Thank you.' Dixie hugged Tamzin again, she felt relieved that she had someone she could trust to look after Jeff for her.

Jeff came back just in time to hear Dixie ask Tamzin to look after him, he would pretend that he hadn't heard but it made him feel happy that she cared about him and had asked Tamzin to take care of him. He went into the staffroom and picked up the baby book and the card, Dixie was holding her flowers and the blanket that Tamzin had made for them. Dixie looked happy, he was glad that he had let Tamzin organise this little party as it had put a smile on Dixie's face. 'Are you ready to go princess?'

'Yes, unless you have any more surprises for me?'

'I think you've had plenty of surprises for one day Dixie.'

'I do too.'

'Come on princess, time to go home.' Jeff held his arm out and Dixie slipped hers through it, they left the hospital through the main entrance and Jeff opened the door for Dixie to get in and then closed it after she had got in. He put the last of the gifts and then got in the car, Dixie was reading her card and smiling at the words people had written in it. 'Are you mad at me for making you the centre of attention?'

'No, it was a very sweet thing you did Jeff.'

'I am glad to hear it princess.'

'Take me home Jeff, do you think we have any chilli sauce in the house?'

'Chilli sauce princess?'

'I just have a sudden craving for it.' Jeff looked at Dixie and chuckled.

'I think your cravings have started, very well, I will get you some.'

'Can we get some cookie dough ice cream too?'

'Yes, Dix, you're not going to eat them together are you?'

'No, I'm not that weird Jeffrey.' Jeff laughed and started the car, he wondered if Dixie would start craving anything else. Whatever she wanted he would get her at whatever time of day or night it was. Jeff smiled, he did have another little surprise for Dixie up his sleeve but he would leave that until tomorrow.


	33. Chapter Thirty-Three

**Author: Raven Shadowrose**

**Rating: M**

**Pairing: ?/?**

**Summary: Sequel to Epiphany, Jeff and Dixie are trying to have a baby, what happens when it is likely to be more difficult than they first thought?**

**Disclaimer: I do not know or own any of the characters from Casualty, any original characters and the story are my property and I do not give permission for either of them to be used.**

**A/N: This is a direct sequel to Epiphany, please read that first to understand this story :) Reviews are welcome :)**

**Thank you to BeethovenRIP, olivia. c. king1 and chan. nelson4444 for your reviews, I really enjoy reading them. I hope you enjoy the chapter. More squish coming your way, might want to prepare the tissues. **

* * *

**Chapter Thirty-Three.**

Jeff had packed some clothes for Dixie while she was busy with the kids and he'd put her bag in with his in the boot of the car. He'd organised a room for them at a hotel not far from where they lived, he didn't want to travel too far now that Dixie was twenty weeks into her pregnancy. He wanted to spend some time with Dixie before the baby came, Tamzin was due any minute and he would tell Dixie that they were going out for the evening which is why Tamzin was looking after the kids. Jeff had it all planned out and he hoped that everything would go smoothly, he wanted Dixie to enjoy herself and have a good time. Jeff opened the door to Tamzin when she knocked and he let her in. 'Hi Tamzin, thanks for doing this.'

'No problem, Sophia and John are lovely kids. You and Dixie need some time together.'

'That's true, I know when the baby arrives we will be busy and won't have a lot of time to spend with each other.'

'You and Dixie will be great parents, I just know it.'

'Thanks Tamzin, I hope you're right, I've know I'm already a dad but it has been a long time since I changed nappies and fed babies.'

'It will come back to you Jeff, you will be fine.' Jeff hoped that Tamzin was right, he wanted to do the best he could for all of his children. 'Go and enjoy your weekend together, don't worry about the kids they will be fine with me.' Jeff nodded and sat down with the kids, he wanted to talk to them before he left. 'Hey kids, me and Dixie are going to spend some time together this weekend. Tamzin is going to look after you while we're away, is that all right?'

'Where are you taking Dixie daddy?' Sophia asked curiously.

'To a hotel for a meal and to stay there for the evening.'

'Are you going to buy her flowers daddy?'

'Flowers, yes, don't tell Dixie but there will be some delivered to her at the hotel.'

'You should buy Dixie chocolate too daddy, she likes chocolate.'

'I know she does my little princess.' Jeff turned to John. 'Are you all right John?'

'Yes dad, I like Tamzin.'

'Good, I am glad to hear it. Tamzin has the number of the hotel if you need us.' Jeff hugged both the kids and he felt reassured that they would be all right while he went away with Dixie.

Dixie had spent a bit of time each day in the nursery, she'd put the presents that everyone had bought the baby into the nursery, she would pack the baby clothes and blanket nearer the time when she was due to go into hospital to give birth. Being in the nursery calmed her, she would sit in the rocking chair and talk to the baby as she rested her hands on her stomach. There were times when Jeff would sit with her and he would talk to the baby too. Dixie had talked to John and Sophia about the baby and she'd given them the baby name book that Jeff had bought and asked them to pick out the names that they liked the most and write them down. She'd let them touch her belly whenever the baby kicked, she hoped that it would help them feel closer to their brother. Dixie snapped out of her thoughts when someone knocked on the door, Jeff popped his head around the door and she waved him in. 'Hi Dixie, are you all right princess?'

'Yeah, though our little one likes kicking my internal organs.' Jeff came over and put his hand on Dixie's belly.

'Hey little one, are you kicking mummy?' Dixie smiled at Jeff as he stroked her belly and talked to their baby. 'Come on Mrs Collier, get your coat, we're going out.'

'Going out, where are we going?'

'You'll see.'

'What about the kids?'

'Tamzin is looking after them.'

'Oh, right.' Dixie wondered where Jeff was taking her, she was curious and really wanted to know what Jeff had planned for them.

Jeff held his arm out to Dixie and she leaned on it as she got up. 'Come on princess.'

'Where are you taking me?'

'You'll see when we get there.' Jeff held Dixie's hand as they went downstairs and went into the living room.

'Hi Dixie,' Tamzin said and smiled at her.

'Hi Tamzin, thanks for looking after the kids.'

'It's no problem, just go and enjoy yourself Dixie.'

'Do you know where Jeff is taking me?'

'I do and before you ask I am sworn to secrecy. Have fun, don't worry about the kids I will look after them.'

'Of course you will.' Jeff helped Dixie to put on her coat and she went over to the kids. 'Be good for Tamzin.'

'Of course we will Dixie,' John said and she hugged him and then Sophia. Jeff hugged the kids and then he went to Tamzin.

'If there are any problems then you have the number.'

'I do, don't worry, go and enjoy yourself.'

'Bye Tamzin, bye kids.'

'Bye Jeff.'

'Bye dad, bye Dixie,' both the kids said together and Jeff took Dixie's hand and escorted her to the car, he really was looking forward to spending some time with Dixie.

Dixie wondered where Jeff was taking her, he had obviously put a lot of planning into this trip and she was surprised that he had managed to keep it a secret from her. She usually knew everything that Jeff was thinking and doing before he did, obviously Tamzin was involved and he'd asked her in advance to look after the kids. Dixie remembered that they talked about going somewhere together but she'd forgotten it and assumed that Jeff had too. She looked around when Jeff stopped the car and she saw the hotel that they had stayed in when they'd renewed their vows. 'Come on Mrs Collier.'

'Jeff, are we going for dinner?'

'Sort of.'

'What do you mean sort of?'

'We have a room for the night.'

'So that is what you've been up to.'

'Yes, I just want to spend some time with you Dixie. Come on princess.' Dixie got out of the car and Jeff went to the boot; he took out two bags and then closed it again.

'You packed for me?'

'I did, don't worry, I have everything you need.'

'Since when did you get so good at packing for women?'

'I do live with a woman Dixie, it comes naturally after a while.'

'I see, come on then Jeffrey, lead the way.' Dixie followed Jeff into the hotel, she was looking forward to spending the evening with him.

Jeff dealt with booking himself and Dixie into their room and he took the key from the receptionist. He picked up the bags and they took the lift to the floor that their room was on, he opened the door and let Dixie go in first. He looked around the room, it was nice and the double bed looked very comfortable. 'I think we'll be quite comfortable here Dixie.'

'Me too, this must have cost a bit Jeff.'

'Don't think about that princess, just enjoy, I want to treat my lovely wife.' Jeff put his arms around Dixie and kissed her, this night was all about them. Jeff rested his head against Dixie's and hugged her close, he was going to have to find a different way of hugging Dixie as her belly was getting bigger. 'Dixie, go and look in the bathroom.'

'The bathroom, why do you want me to look in there?'

'Go on princess.' Jeff followed Dixie into the bathroom, he couldn't wait to see her reaction when she saw what he had managed to get them.

Dixie looked around the bathroom and she saw that it had a bath built into the floor. 'Jeff, is that a bath in the floor?'

'Yes princess, it is big enough for us both to get into it.'

'I am looking forward to that.'

'I thought you would like it, my water baby.'

'Come on Dixie, we'll have dinner and then we'll get into the bath and relax.'

'Dinner too, you are spoiling me Jeffrey Collier.'

'Anything for you princess.' Dixie went into the bedroom and sat down on the bed, she took her shoes off and wriggled her toes. It was nice to sit down and rest her feet, now that her bump was getting bigger she was finding that parts of her body were beginning to hurt, mainly her back and occasionally her legs and knees. Jeff came and sat next to her and she cuddled up to him. 'Are you okay Dix?'

'Yeah, I am just feeling a bit tired.'

'I'm not surprised, you are carrying around a little person in your belly.'

'I know, I hope that the control room at ambulance dispatch has comfortable chairs.'

'I am sure it will princess.'

'Are you going to be all right Jeff?'

'Of course I will be Dixie, it's you I'm worried about.'

'I just want you to be safe while I'm not there to look after you.'

'Don't worry, I promise you that I will be there holding your hand when you give birth. I won't do anything that means I can't be there for you and our baby.'

'Thanks Jeff, I love you.'

'I love you too princess.' Dixie snuggled herself closer to Jeff and she felt him kiss her on the head, she felt more at ease now that he had promised to be careful.

Tamzin sat with the kids while they looked at a book together. 'What are you doing kids?'

'Mummy Dixie and daddy asked us to look at names for the baby,' Sophia said.

'Really, have you picked some that you might like?'

'We're working on it.'

'Are you writing them down?'

'We are, we're going to give the list to dad when he comes back,' John said and wrote another name down on the piece of paper that was sat in front of him. 'That's a good idea, are you looking forward to having a baby brother to look after, Sophia?'

'I am, I can't wait to see what he looks like.' Tamzin smiled. 'I bet he will be so cute.'

'What about you John, are you looking forward to seeing the new baby?'

'I am, I promised to look after him and I'm going to teach him how to play football.'

'That's good, you're going to be a very good big brother, I can tell, much better than my brother because he used to push me in the mud.'

'He sounds horrible, I like looking after Sophia and I will do the same when the new baby arrives.'

Tamzin smiled, she loved looking after Sophia and John, they were good kids and whenever she looked after them it made her think about having children of her own someday.

Jeff put the plates back onto the trolley after they'd had something to eat from room service, it pleased him to see that Dixie ate well and was still enjoying her food. It was important that she ate all of the right things to keep her and the baby healthy throughout the pregnancy. Jeff took Dixie's hands in his and then kissed her. 'Come with me princess.' He helped Dixie stand up and took her into the bathroom, he'd already put their night clothes in the room so that they could get into them when they got out of the bath. He had originally planned to get a room with a hot tub but the websites he had been on all suggested it was best that pregnant women avoid them so he'd gone for the bath instead. Once the bath was warm enough he turned the taps off and went over to Dixie, he helped her to undress and then took off his own clothes. He supported Dixie as they got into the bath and sat with his back against the wall. 'Come my love.' He opened his arms to Dixie. 'Sit in front of me.' Once Dixie was settled and comfortable he wrapped his arms around her and rested his hand on her belly.

Dixie found it comforting to be held by Jeff, the warm water was working wonders on her back and getting rid of the ache she felt there. 'Lean forward princess.' Dixie did as Jeff asked her to and she felt his hands gently massaging her aching muscles, she sighed in pleasure and rested her hands on her thighs. Jeff was very good with his hands and he was working wonders on her back right now. He knew exactly where to massage to make her feel better, she closed her eyes as his hands moved back up to her shoulders and then down her arms. Dixie moved back until she was resting against Jeff's body, he was strong and his arms around her made her feel safe. Dixie felt Jeff's hand tracing small circles over her bump.' Jeff?'

'Yes princess.'

'That feels nice.'

'Good. What's the baby doing?'

'I think he's sleeping, he doesn't move around all of the time.'

'How are you sleeping, I know it can be uncomfortable for you as the bump gets bigger.'

'I'm all right if I sleep on my side with something supporting my stomach.'

'Good, you would tell me if you were struggling to sleep, wouldn't you?'

'Yeah, I'm okay for now though.'

'Good.' Dixie loved the fact that Jeff was so caring and loving, it made her feel better about what was to come. She'd looked at other women with their neat, round bumps and wondered why she was so big. She felt ungainly and huge. 'Dixie, what are you thinking about?'

'Am I massive Jeff?'

'How do you mean?'

'I just feel huge.'

'You're pregnant love and you're beautiful. Come with me Dixie.'

'Where are we going?' Dixie took Jeff's hand and let him help her out of the bath, just what was he up to?

Jeff stood Dixie in front of the mirror and put his arms around her. 'Look at yourself Dixie, do you know how I see you?'

'No.'

'You're beautiful, your skin is glowing and you have a sparkle about you, the sparkle of knowing that there's a little life inside you. The glow you have is the glow of the true love you carry for our child.' Jeff settled his hand on Dixie's belly. 'You are so beautiful princess, I love you and our baby.' Jeff held Dixie closer and he kissed her on the cheek.

'Is that really what you think of me?'

'Yes princess, that's really what I think.' Jeff saw the tears falling down Dixie's cheeks and he gently wiped them away with his thumb. 'Dix, why are you crying? I didn't mean to make you cry.'

'I'm crying because I'm happy, it appears my hormones want to make me cry.'

'So you're not sad?'

'No love.'

'Come on Dixie, let's get you dressed, I don't want you getting cold.' Jeff helped Dixie into her pyjamas and then dressed himself. He emptied the bath and then took Dixie back into the bedroom.

Dixie saw the flowers the minute she entered the room, it was a huge bouquet of roses in a different colours. 'Those weren't there when we arrived.'

'I know, they're for you princess.'

'They're beautiful, you really are spoiling me Jeff, you don't have to spend all of this money on me.'

'I want to, you've made me the happiest man in the world Dixie and I want to treat you and show you what you mean to me.' Dixie felt tears appearing in her eyes again and she blinked them back, she was sure it was the pregnancy hormones that made her want to cry at everything. What Jeff had said to her earlier had made her so happy and she was sure that she hadn't heard anything quite so beautiful in her life. 'Jeff, I know you probably brought me here for more intimate reasons but could we just cuddle tonight.'

'If my princess wants to cuddle then we'll cuddle.'

'You're not disappointed?'

'No Dixie, of course I'm not.'

'Thank you.' Dixie was relieved that Jeff wasn't disappointed that she didn't want to make love tonight, she just wanted him to hold her close and be with him. She got into the bed and made herself comfortable on her side while Jeff turned out the main light and left the lamp on. Dixie looked at Jeff when he got into bed and she cuddled up to him, she just looked at Jeff and smiled. 'I love you Jeff.'

'Love you too princess, you and our little bug.' Dixie turned onto her other side and she felt Jeff cuddle up to her back and rest his hand on her belly. 'Goodnight little bug, sleep well,' she heard Jeff whispering as she felt sleep begin to descend over her.

Jeff just watched Dixie sleep for a while, he stroked her belly and then rested his hand on the bump. 'My little boy, my son, your mummy is so very special to me. She's so beautiful and an amazing woman. I love her a lot and we're going to make sure that she is safe; you and me, we'll make sure that mummy can bring you safely into this world.' Jeff felt the baby kick against his hand and he took that as agreement, it made him smile. 'I love you my little bug, I cannot wait until you are here with us.' Jeff kissed Dixie's head and turned off the lamp. 'Goodnight princess, rest well my love, my Dixie.' Jeff closed his eyes and moved as close as he could to Dixie, he would protect her and make sure that she was safe no matter what it took.


	34. Chapter Thirty-Four

**Author: Raven Shadowrose**

**Rating: M**

**Pairing: ?/?**

**Summary: Sequel to Epiphany, Jeff and Dixie are trying to have a baby, what happens when it is likely to be more difficult than they first thought?**

**Disclaimer: I do not know or own any of the characters from Casualty, any original characters and the story are my property and I do not give permission for either of them to be used.**

**A/N: This is a direct sequel to Epiphany, please read that first to understand this story :) Reviews are welcome :)**

**Thank you to BeethovenRIP, olivia. c. king1 and chan. nelson4444 for your reviews, I really appreciate them, enjoy the chapter ladies :) **

* * *

**Chapter**** Thirty-Four.**

Dixie woke up slowly, she felt Jeff's hand on her belly, she snuggled back against Jeff and put her hand on top of his where it rested on top of her stomach. She felt the baby moving around inside her, he was very active this morning and it comforted her to feel him moving and to know that he was okay. She liked feeling the baby move and kick, it made her feel close to her son, she couldn't wait for the day that she could hold him in her arms. Dixie felt Jeff's breathing on the back of her neck, he was obviously still sleeping and she took advantage of the quiet of the morning to do a little bit of thinking. What would it be like giving birth? She'd delivered plenty of babies and each time she saw the pain and emotion that all of the women went through. To tell the truth she was a bit scared, she was likely to be in labour for hours, would she be able to deal with the pain? Dixie wanted to give birth as naturally as possible but she was a bit scared of the pain, she was under no illusion that it was going to hurt. Dixie knew that Jeff would be with her while she was giving birth, he would hold her hand and make her feel better through it all.

Jeff opened his eyes and looked at Dixie, he noticed that her hand was on top his where it was lying on her stomach, it made him smile. 'Princess, are you awake?'

'Yeah, I am.'

'Did you sleep well?'

'I did, this bed is nice and comfortable.'

'Good, I am glad to hear that Dixie.' He gently moved his hand from under Dixie's, lifted her pyjama top and stroked her belly, he really liked touching Dixie like this and it seemed to relax her. 'Dixie, do you realise that your belly button is now sticking out?'

'Yeah, it is to do with my belly growing.'

'I like it, it is cute.'

'Do you think so?'

'Yes princess, I do, you have a very cute belly. Are you warm enough?'

'I am, you are my personal heater.'

'Tell me if you start feeling cold.'

'I will. Jeff?'

'Yes princess.' Dixie turned on her other side and faced him and he saw the worry in her eyes. 'What's wrong?'

'What if I can't cope with the pain?'

'What pain?'

'When I give birth, what if I can't cope, what if something bad happens to me or the baby?'

'That's not going to happen princess.'

'How do you know?' Jeff just put his arm around Dixie and hugged her, she was experiencing the normal worries of a pregnant woman and he thought carefully about what he was going to say to her. Jeff wanted to make Dixie feel better, he didn't like it when she was worried or scared, he wouldn't let anything happen to her, he would protect her, always.

Dixie took some comfort from Jeff hugging her, she wasn't sure where the worries had come from, they were just there in her mind. 'Jeff, how do you know anything bad won't happen to me and the baby?'

'Giving birth is natural Dixie, your body knows what to do. How many women have you helped while they've been giving birth?'

'Lots of them.'

'Do you remember what you told them?'

'That everything is going to be fine and they will be okay.'

'Exactly, I'm going to say it to you, everything will be fine and you will be okay Dixie. I'll be in that room with you until you give birth and hold our son in your arms. I'll hold your hand and help you through every minute.' Dixie smiled.

'Thanks Jeff, I don't know what I'd do without you.'

'You're not going to be without me princess, I will not leave you alone for a minute.'

'You promise?'

'I promise.'

'I suppose every mother goes through this and has these feelings.'

'They do, you're not the only one sweetheart.' Dixie felt Jeff kiss her on the head and she cuddled up to him. 'Everything will be okay princess, I won't let anything happen to you or the baby.' Dixie rested her head against Jeff's chest so she could listen to his heart beating, she needed to hear the comforting sound of it right now.

Jeff stroked Dixie's hair as she lay with her head against his chest, he was hoping that she was feeling a bit better. 'Don't worry my princess. Are you feeling better?'

'Yeah, I feel safe with you.'

'I am glad to hear it Dixie, you're always safe with me.'

'I know, you'll always protect me.'

'Our baby is safe with you, I know that you will bring him safely into the world. You're the strongest person I know Dixie, you will do brilliantly when giving birth to our baby.'

'It is nice to know that you have faith in me Jeff.'

'I do, you're my warrior princess Dixie.' Jeff was pleased to see a smile on Dixie's face and he tilted her face up so he could kiss her. 'I love you princess.'

'Love you too Jeff.' He kissed Dixie again and stroked her face. 'Jeff, can we use the bath again?'

'Of course we can princess.' He helped Dixie up and took her into the bathroom, they didn't have to be out of the hotel until later on in the day so they could take their time and just spend some time together.

Dixie stood at the side as Jeff ran the bath, she was looking forward to getting in it with him. Jeff checked the temperature of the bath and he came over to her. 'Come on then Dixie.' She let him help her out of her pyjamas and then they climbed into the bath together. Dixie settled herself in Jeff's arms and let him hold her, she loved the feeling of the warm water against her skin. Jeff's hand was making trails up and down her back, she sighed happily and rested her head on Jeff's chest. 'Are you okay Dixie?'

'Yeah, this is nice, you're lovely and warm Jeff.'

'I am glad you think so Dixie.'

'I do.' Dixie looked up at Jeff and she kissed him, his tongue slipped inside her mouth and she moved closer to Jeff as they kissed. Dixie loved the feelings that Jeff was creating in her, she wasn't sure how much longer they would be able to be together and make love to each other. She wanted to make the most of it as her bump was getting heavier with every day that went by.

Jeff slowly moved his head away from Dixie, he wanted her but he wasn't sure if Dixie felt the same. 'Dixie, I want to make love to you princess, if you don't want me to then that is fine.'

'I do want you to Jeffrey.' Jeff kissed Dixie again, he moved his hand down her body and slipped his hand between Dixie's legs and gently rubbed her clit, she moaned into his mouth and he felt her hand move down and take hold of his hardening length and start to stroke him. 'Don't stop Dixie.' Jeff groaned and he slipped a finger inside Dixie and slowly moved it in and out of her body. Dixie's moaning and her hand stroking him was making him harder and harder. 'Dixie, I want to be inside you.'

'Make love to me Jeffrey.'

'My pleasure princess.' Jeff supported Dixie as she straddled his legs and took his length inside her body. 'Are you all right Dixie?'

'Yes love.' Jeff looked into Dixie's eyes and kissed her gently when she started to move, he rocked his hips and Dixie moaned into his mouth.

'I love you Dixie, so very much.'

'Love you too Jeff.' Jeff's hands moved to Dixie's waist and he controlled her movements a little bit. Dixie's moans came more frequently and he felt her body squeeze his length.

'Christ Dixie, you sound so beautiful when you come.' Jeff moved up into Dixie's body and held her close to him, he moved slowly as he didn't want to hurt her.

Dixie put her hands against the back wall of the bath and looked into Jeff's eyes as they made love to each other. She held Jeff close to her as he moved deep inside her body, she heard him moan and then he buried his head into her shoulder as he came inside her. Dixie kissed Jeff's head and she felt his arms wrap around her, holding her close to him, she felt safe and loved in his arms. She just let him hold her, making love always made her feel close to Jeff and she knew that it was the same for him. Jeff moved his head from Dixie's shoulder and he kissed her, Dixie smiled at Jeff and moved slowly off him and back into the water. She cuddled up to Jeff and his arms wrapped themselves around her, she loved him so much. 'Dix.'

'Yeah love.'

'How are you feeling now?'

'I'm all right, I'm not worrying so much now.'

'Good, I don't want my princess worrying.'

'I'm not, thanks to you.'

'I'm glad to hear it.' Dixie rested her head against Jeff's shoulder, she felt more relaxed and happier, Jeff talking to her and promising to be there during the birth had helped her so much.

Jeff made Dixie get out the bath and they dried each other off, they got dressed and he ordered them some breakfast. He made sure that Dixie was sitting down and resting while he took the breakfast off the tray. 'Enjoy princess.'

'Thanks Jeff, for some reason I am very hungry.' Jeff laughed and tucked into his own breakfast, he'd ordered them a full English each and he was pleased to see Dixie happily eating. He had been keeping an eye on her lately to make sure that she was eating properly and resting as much as she should. Jeff was pleased that Dixie was going to work at dispatch tomorrow as she would be able to sit down instead of running around all the time. Jeff knew that her back was sore and standing up was sometimes hard for her. He was going to miss Dixie while they were working separately but he'd rather her be there and safe than working with him.

Dixie put down her knife and fork, she'd really enjoyed the breakfast that Jeff had ordered for them. She quickly went into the bathroom and collected her things from earlier, Jeff had gone down to reception to settle the bill and he would be back shortly. The fact that she had such a supportive and loving husband made her feel good, she loved him so much and working away from him was going to be hard. His promise to be with her throughout the birth made her feel so much more relaxed and reassured about what was to come. Dixie knew that she could get through anything with Jeff by her side, she smiled as she remembered him calling her his warrior princess, it made her feel strong and powerful. Dixie stood up and went over to the roses that Jeff had bought her, they smelled wonderful and were so beautiful. She gently touched the petals and breathed in the scent. Dixie wondered if her mum and dad knew about the baby, could they see that she was going to be a mum? She wished that they were still alive so they could see their grandson, maybe they would be watching with Polly when the little boy she had conceived with Jeff arrived into the world. All she wanted was for him to be healthy and to arrive safely, she would do everything in her power to make sure that their little boy would be safe throughout his life.

Jeff went back into the hotel room and found Dixie looking out of the window and holding her flowers. 'Are you ready to go home princess?'

'Yeah, I am. Thank you for this Jeff, it has been lovely.'

'My pleasure, I love to see you smile Dixie.'

'Come on love, let's go home.' Jeff held his arm out and Dixie put hers through it, he had thoroughly enjoyed spending time alone with Dixie, he was pleased that he was able to put her mind at rest about the pregnancy and giving birth. It was normal for her to be nervous about what was to come but he would be with her through every moment, he wouldn't let her be alone.

Dixie held her flowers in her arms as Jeff drove them home, she felt relaxed and as if she'd had a week away. The thought that she was working at dispatch from tomorrow came to mind but she pushed it away, that was for tomorrow, right now she wanted to go home and relax. She was met by Sophia and John when Jeff parked the car outside the house. 'Mummy Dixie, did you like the flowers?' Sophia asked the minute that Dixie got out of the car. 'I told daddy he should get some.'

'I like them very much.'

'Can I put them in some water?'

'Of course you can sweet pea.' Dixie handed the flowers to Sophia and she ran off into the house.

'Dixie, we have some names for the baby.' Dixie took the list that John held out to her.

'Thank you John, I will look at them with your dad soon.'

'I like Matthew the best.'

'Do you?'

'Yes, but Sophia likes Sam.'

'We will let you know what we've picked when we look through the list. Where's Tamzin?'

'She's inside, I like Tamzin, she's nice, she helped us pick the names out.' Dixie smiled at John, he was so much more talkative now and she'd noticed him coming out of his shell a lot more.

Jeff looked on in pride as John talked to Dixie, he was so pleased with the changes in John, he was a lot more confident and had lost a lot of his shyness. He was about to say something to Dixie when Tamzin came out of the house. 'Hey you two.'

'Hi Tamzin, how were the kids?' Jeff asked.

'A pleasure to look after as always. Did you enjoy yourselves?'

'We did, thanks for looking after the kids for us.'

'It's no trouble, I am just glad that you enjoyed yourselves. I have to go as Tom is coming to mine tonight. I'll see you tomorrow Jeff, good luck at dispatch tomorrow Dixie.'

'Thanks Tamzin,' Dixie said and smiled at her. Jeff and Dixie both waved at Tamzin as she got into her own car and drove off. 'Jeff, look what I've got.' Dixie held out a sheet of paper with writing on it.

'What's that?'

'A list of baby names that Sophia and John picked out for us.'

'Oh, so that's what they spent last night doing.'

'Yeah, I thought we could look through them later on.'

'Good idea, come on Mrs Collier, it is time you put your feet up.'

'Now there's an offer I can't refuse.' Jeff smiled and held his arm out to Dixie, she put hers through it and they went into the house. Jeff was curious as to what names the kids had picked out for the baby, he would go through them with Dixie later on after he had made sure that she was resting, she had a big day tomorrow and he was going to make sure that she had some time to relax and got enough sleep before she started her new job in the morning.


	35. Chapter Thirty-Five

**Author: Raven Shadowrose**

**Rating: M**

**Pairing: ?/?**

**Summary: Sequel to Epiphany, Jeff and Dixie are trying to have a baby, what happens when it is likely to be more difficult than they first thought?**

**Disclaimer: I do not know or own any of the characters from Casualty, any original characters and the story are my property and I do not give permission for either of them to be used.**

**A/N: This is a direct sequel to Epiphany, please read that first to understand this story :) Reviews are welcome :)**

**Thank you to BeethovenRIP, olivia. c. king1 and chan. nelson4444 for your reviews, I really appreciate them. How will Dixie's first day at ambulance dispatch go? **

* * *

**Chapter Thirty-Five.**

Dixie sat quietly in the car as Jeff drove her to her new job, she wondered what the people she would be working with would be like, would they be nice? Would she get on with them? Would they like her? Jeff stopped the car in front of the dispatch building and she looked up at it, she didn't really want to go in there, she was used to being the person that went to the shouts and dealt with the casualties. How was she going to deal with being the person that took calls from people needing help and gave the crews their shouts? How would she deal with spending the day apart from Jeff? Dixie sighed and took off her seatbelt, she was going to have to go in there sooner or later. 'Dixie,' she heard Jeff say and she looked at him. 'Are you all right princess?'

'I think so.'

'You'll be all right Dixie, this is the right thing to do.'

'I know it is.'

'You and the baby will be safe here.'

'We will be, that's why I'm doing this. Jeff, you will keep your promise, won't you?'

'Of course I will princess, I will not do anything reckless.'

'Thank you.' Dixie felt better hearing Jeff say he wouldn't do anything reckless.

'Anything for you and our little bug princess.'

'You know he has name now Jeffrey.'

'He does, I do like little bug though.'

'It is cute. I'm going to miss you Jeff.'

'I will miss you too princess, come on my Dixie.' Dixie got out of the car and waited for Jeff, he came over to her. 'Give me a hug my Dixie.' She moved into Jeff's arms and let him hug her, she breathed deeply and hugged Jeff tightly. 'Good luck princess, I know you will do just fine.'

'Thanks Jeff.'

'I'll pick you up when your shift ends and you can tell me everything.' Dixie hugged Jeff again and then she let him go. 'I'll see you later princess.'

'See you later Jeff.' Dixie kissed Jeff and waved at him as he drove away, she watched the car all the way to the end of the street and then turned back to the dispatch building. 'Come on peanut, let's make daddy proud,' Dixie said and walked into her new workplace.

Jeff got himself changed and went out into the station, Tamzin was waiting for him by their ambulance. 'Hey Jeff, how is Dixie this morning?'

'She's okay, I think.'

'She will be fine Jeff, it is better for Dixie to be away from shouts while she's pregnant.'

'I know, I am glad that she's somewhere safe.'

'Of course you are, daddy Jeff. Have you thought of a name for him yet?'

'We have, we're going to keep it a secret until he is born though.'

'I am sure that the name you picked will be adorable.'

'Thanks Tamzin.'

'It is so quiet without Dixie here, I keep expecting her to come through the door any minute now.'

'I know, it is going to be weird not working with her for over a year.'

'You'll be all right Jeff.'

'I know, it might just take a lot of getting used to. How does it feel wearing the duty manager's badges?'

'Right now it feels weird, I keep forgetting that I'm in charge.'

'You will do a wonderful job Tamzin.'

'I hope so, it is nice that you have faith in me though.'

'You deserve it.' Jeff's thoughts turned to Dixie and how she was coping on her first day at ambulance dispatch and working with totally different people.

Dixie sat in the reception of ambulance dispatch waiting for the manager to come and get her, it was going to be strange working for someone else and no longer being in charge. There were people walking by and she looked at them curiously, they all seemed to know each other and it reminded her of her own crew. She was beginning to miss everyone already and she felt so very out of place. Dixie saw a woman walking down the stars towards her and she stood up. 'You must be Kathleen Collier, I'm Tania.' Dixie shook the hand that Tania held out to her. 'Come with me and I'll show you around. I have your ID badge, you must wear it all the time that you are in this building.'

'Okay.' Dixie took the badge from Tania and put the lanyard over her head.

'You'll sign in here in the morning and then out again at the end of your shift.' Dixie quickly signed herself in and she followed Tania into the control room. 'I am sure you know a bit about what goes on here as you're a paramedic. All of the emergency calls for the Holby area come through here and it is our job to dispatch crews to everyone in order of need. Are you with me so far?'

'Yeah, I am.'

'Good. I just need to check a few things so if you'll come with me.' Dixie followed Tania into her office and sat down in the chair that she was offered. 'The information I have in front of me tells me that you'll be with us for three months, is that correct?'

'Yeah, I'll be here until I go on maternity leave.'

'Okay, I assume you're here because as duty manager you couldn't take light duty.'

'That's correct.'

'All right, this morning you will do some training and then shadow one of our more experienced call handlers to see how they handle emergency calls. Is that all right?'

'Yeah, that's fine.'

'Okay, follow me and I'll take you to our training suite.' Dixie stood up and left Tania's office, she hoped that she would do well at the training.

Jeff's mind was still on Dixie and how she was coping with working at dispatch, he was wondering and thinking a lot about how she was getting on. He was still thinking about Dixie when his phone rang and he smiled when he saw Dixie's name on the screen. 'Hi princess, I didn't expect to hear from you today.'

'I've got a break for lunch, I just needed to hear your voice.' Jeff smiled at the thought that Dixie wanted to hear his voice. 'It is nice to hear you too my Dixie. How did your morning go?'

'All right, they've been training me in how to take calls and dispatch crews.'

'Are you enjoying it?'

'Sort of, I miss everyone though.'

'We miss you too Dixie. It is very quiet without you Dixie.'

'Are you saying I'm loud Jeffrey Collier?'

'Of course not sweetheart. What are you going to do in the afternoon?'

'I think you are, naughty Jeffrey, I'm shadowing someone called Louise and then I get to have a go myself.' Jeff grinned at Dixie calling him naughty.

'You'll do brilliantly princess.'

'I love you Jeff.'

'Love you too Dixie.'

'How is Tamzin getting on?'

She's doing really well, you made your choice well Dixie.'

'I am glad to hear that, she can't go wrong with you supporting her.'

'Thanks princess.'

'I have to go, Tania, the boss, wants me back now so I can start shadowing Louise.'

'See you later princess, take care of yourself and our little bug.'

'See you later Jeff, you take care of yourself too.'

'I promise my princess, bye Dixie.'

'Bye Jeff.' Jeff ended the call and put his phone back in his pocket, hearing Dixie's voice had made him feel so much better, he had been missing her a lot all morning.

Dixie went back into the control room with Tania and she stopped by a desk that had a woman with dark hair sat at it. 'Louise.' The woman turned around and smiled at Tania, Dixie saw Louise look at her and then down at her bump, she saw the look that Louise gave her, it was clear that Louise thought she was too old to be pregnant. 'This is Kathleen, she'll be shadowing you this afternoon. I thought she should learn from the best.' Dixie wanted to throw up at the sickly sweet smile that Louise gave to Tania, Dixie was quite certain that she wasn't going to like Louise. Tania turned to Dixie and smiled. 'I'll leave you in Louise's capable hands, if you have any questions then you can ask her.'

'Okay.'

'I'll leave you to it.' Dixie sat in the spare seat and folded her hands on top of her belly.

'So you're the new arrival.' Louise spoke with a posh accent and made it very clear that she didn't approve of Dixie being here.

'Looks like it.'

'Like Tania said, I am the best here and you would do well to follow my example.'

'Right, I'll be sure to do just that.' Dixie smiled when Louise glared at her and turned back to the screen that she was logging her calls on. She wasn't sure if she should be making enemies on her first day but Louise was so stuck up and sure of her own self importance that she did need taking down a peg or two. Dixie was feeling quite annoyed that Louise kept glancing at her bump with a very disapproving look on her face, she reminded herself to stay calm for the baby, she would not let Louise wind her up.

Jeff happily drove to the ambulance dispatch in plenty of time to pick Dixie up, he was eager to know how her day had gone and how she had managed taking calls and so on. He couldn't wait to see Dixie, he had missed her so much during the day and that had only increased as it got closer to the end of his shift and to the time when he could see Dixie again. He tapped his hand on the steering wheel and hummed along to the radio as he sat waiting for Dixie to come out. Jeff felt even happier when he saw Dixie coming out of the building and he got out of the car, went over to her and hugged her. Jeff tilted Dixie's head up and kissed her gently. 'I missed you today princess.'

'I missed you too.'

'I'm so happy to see you.'

'Me too Jeff, that hug was just what I needed.' Jeff kissed Dixie again and he heard someone cough behind them and saw a dark haired woman staring at them as she walked past. She didn't look too happy. 'Who's that?'

'Louise, she is the self styled queen of the control room. I don't think she's ever met a rule that she didn't like.' Jeff laughed, Dixie was definitely on fine form and her usual self. 'She definitely doesn't like me or the fact that I am pregnant.'

'It's not bothering you is it princess?'

'No, she can think what she likes. I've been taking great pleasure in annoying her, whenever she gives me her disapproving look I just smile at her.' Jeff laughed again, it pleased him to see that Dixie was in high spirits and sounded happy.

'Come on then princess, let's get you and little bug home.'

'I like the sound of that, lead the way Mr Collier.' Jeff helped Dixie into the car and closed the door, he went to his own side and got in, despite the fact Dixie had met someone she didn't like she seemed to have enjoyed her first day at ambulance dispatch and that made him happy.

Dixie was happy to be going home, she had made it through her first day and Jeff was here, safe and in one piece. She had taken a few calls and it had gone well, Tania seemed to be pleased with her work and how quickly she had learned what she needed to know. It was different to her usual job but she'd liked learning something new and seeing how the other side worked. A couple of her new colleagues had smiled at her and said hello as they were walking past, it gave her hope that they weren't all like Louise. Dixie noted that nobody seemed to speak to Louise, maybe she had a talent for making people dislike her. Dixie was happy that her first day had gone so well, she was looking forward to going home and relaxing with Jeff and the kids.

Jeff looked at Dixie and he smiled, her head was resting against the chair and she had her eyes closed. 'Princess, we're almost home, don't go to sleep on me now.'

'I'm not sleeping Jeffrey, I'm resting my eyes.' Jeff chuckled, he could hear the sleepiness in her voice.

'I think my princess needs a little nap before tea and her treat.'

'Treat, what treat?' Jeff laughed at how Dixie was immediately awake the minute she heard the word treat. 'Come on Jeffrey, don't keep me in suspense.'

'Someone might just have a bar of their favourite chocolate waiting for them when they get home.'

'Really, can I have it when we get in?'

'No, you'll spoil your tea.' Jeff smiled when Dixie mock glared at him.

'Fine, you're no fun Jeffrey.'

'I am lots of fun, I'll show you later if you're a good girl.' Dixie laughed and Jeff smiled at her, she was in definite good spirits.

'Perhaps I should be a bad girl instead.'

'Bad girls don't get chocolate.'

'Spoil sport.' Jeff chuckled when Dixie started laughing, he was so glad to have her back, he had really missed her today.


	36. Chapter Thirty-Six

**Author: Raven Shadowrose**

**Rating: M**

**Pairing: ?/?**

**Summary: Sequel to Epiphany, Jeff and Dixie are trying to have a baby, what happens when it is likely to be more difficult than they first thought?**

**Disclaimer: I do not know or own any of the characters from Casualty, any original characters and the story are my property and I do not give permission for either of them to be used.**

**A/N: This is a direct sequel to Epiphany, please read that first to understand this story :) Reviews are welcome :)**

**Thank you to BeethovenRIP, olivia. c. king1 and chan. nelson4444 for your reviews, squishy time :) **

* * *

**Chapter Thirty-Six.**

Dixie was quite happy that she had reached the end of her first week working at ambulance dispatch, she was getting to know her new colleagues and she had even gone to lunch with a few of them during the week. She'd shown them the scan picture that she kept on her person at all times and was pleased when they said how cute the baby looked. Dixie appreciated that they'd made her feel welcome and invited her into their little circle. It didn't surprise her to hear that Louise generally wasn't liked by near enough everybody that worked with her. They all had their stories of how Louise had turned her nose up at them and acted like she was better than them all. It puzzled Dixie as to how Louise didn't care that people didn't like her, Dixie was sure that she knew how they felt about her and yet she made no move to change their opinion or act differently. She'd ignored all of the disapproving looks that Louise sent her way, if Louise wanted to spend her time giving people nasty looks and generally being horrible then that was her problem. Dixie sighed quietly, she had come up here to rest and get away from it all for a while, she was feeling a bit tired but she didn't want to sleep, she just wanted to relax and unwind after her first week working at a new place. She was getting used to her different work now but sometimes she wished that she was still working on the ambulance crew with Jeff by her side.

Dixie placed her hands on her belly, she'd been reading up on pregnancy and from now the baby would be able to hear her when she spoke to him. She'd been doing it an awful lot lately, she would tell him what she'd been doing during the day or about something that she had knitted for him. She would also tell him how much she was looking forward to seeing him and holding him and how much his daddy was looking forward to meeting him too. Dixie told him all about Sophia and John and how much she loved them and that he would have a big brother and a big sister that would look after him and keep him safe. She told him about the pram and carry cot that they had bought for him and would be here any day now, it was expensive but it was worth it. They'd bought a proper car seat too so he would be safe in the car when they went out. Talking to the baby was a way for her to feel close to him and increase their bond and connection. Dixie had noticed that sometimes her feet and ankles were a bit swollen, mainly when she'd been stood up for too long, she was having to sit down a lot more now. Sometimes her back would ache and she found that Jeff rubbing the places where she ached made her feel a whole lot better and closer to him now that she was finding it harder to make love. Jeff was so understanding and didn't mind that she didn't have the energy these days, she would cuddle up to him and just hold her in his arms.

Jeff had sent Dixie upstairs to have a lie down, she looked dead on her feet and he thought it would be better for her if she got some rest. No doubt her first week at work had tired her out and he was glad that she had a couple of days off to rest. Jeff was quite bemused by Dixie's cravings, one minute she was craving chilli sauce and the next it was ice cream. She'd even had a few days where she craved cheddar cheese almost non stop, whatever she wanted he would get it for her, he wanted his princess to be happy and if that meant he had to run to the shop and get her whatever she wanted then he would do it. Jeff looked that the calendar that the kids had been using to keep track of the days until Dixie had the baby. They'd marked off twenty-two weeks worth of days and that meant she had around fourteen to sixteen weeks to go. Jeff had been secretly preparing himself for weeks, it was a long time since Sophia and John had been born and he wanted to make sure that he was ready for anything that might happen. He'd been reading a lot and taking in a lot of information on ways that he could support Dixie through her pregnancy. Jeff had taken on a lot of the chores and he'd roped the kids into helping him out too, he was proud of them and the mature way that they were acting. He knew that Dixie appreciated the help as she was finding it harder to get around now, she was quite big and that meant she often needed to rest and couldn't do as much around the house as she had previously done. Jeff was walking Little Abs all the time now as he didn't want Dixie over exerting herself too much.

Jeff was currently thinking about the baby, he was impatient and couldn't wait to see him when he arrived, he hoped that their little one would have Dixie's eyes, he'd always liked her eyes even before they became a proper couple. Dixie's eyes made him feel safe, he always saw compassion and love in them when he looked into her eyes. He'd been thinking about the baby a lot lately, he had put copies of the pictures from the scan in his locker and he even kept some in the ambulance so he could look at them from time to time. Looking at the pictures reminded him of how many good things he had in his life; John and Sophia, Dixie and the baby, he was so grateful and he felt so very lucky to have them all. The kids were doing their homework at the table and he was watching them as they worked, he was glad that they were working hard at school and on their homework, he wanted them to succeed at whatever career they chose and that success started with working hard at school and getting good exam results. Jeff's thoughts turned to Lucy, Alan was keeping him informed but there wasn't much news other than she was improving. There hadn't been a call for quite a few days, he'd asked the kids if they wanted to see their mum but they'd said no. Jeff understood, they'd been through quite a bad time with Lucy when she was falling prey to her illness and it might take a long time before they were ready to see her. If the kids wanted to see her then he wouldn't stop them, she was their mum and they had the right to see her if they wanted to.

Dixie was sat up on the bed and reading a book, she felt a lot better now that she'd had the chance to rest. Dixie heard the light knock on the door. 'Come in.' Sophia popped her head around the door and then came in.

'Mummy Dixie, can I sit with you for a while?'

'Of course you can sweet pea.'

'I've finished all of my homework so daddy said I could do whatever I wanted.'

'That's good.'

'I chose to come and sit with you.' Dixie smiled at Sophia and made room for her, she put her arm around Sophia's shoulders. 'What does it feel like having a baby in your stomach?'

'It feels nice, I can feel him moving around in my stomach and every so often I feel one of his kicks. It is comforting to know that he's all right because I can feel him moving.'

'Does he move all the time?'

'Not all the time, sometimes he is asleep and then he is quite still. I know when he is awake because he moves.'

'I can't wait to see him.' Dixie felt Sophia put her hand on top of the bump. 'Is he very heavy?'

'He weighs about a pound now, about as much as the small bags of sugar we see in the supermarket.'

'Oh, that is still very tiny.'

'He is, he will be a lot bigger when he comes out though.'

'I've told daddy he has to hold your hand when the baby comes out.'

'You don't have to worry about that Sophia, your daddy has promised to hold my hand and be there all the time.'

'Good, I'm glad.' Dixie kissed Sophia on the head and hugged her, she was quite content to lie there with her and relax.

Jeff had spent the evening with John, they'd played on the computer and walked Little Abs, he was so happy with the changes he'd noticed in his son. He'd noticed that John was thriving and had become so much more talkative since coming to stay with him and Dixie. It had been nice to spend the evening with him and just play and have fun. Jeff had sent John up to bed when he noticed that his son was getting tired, he'd gone with him and Jeff wished him goodnight before turning out the light and closing the door. He went to the room he shared with Dixie when he realised that Sophia wasn't in her own room. When he entered, he saw Sophia in her pyjamas and fast asleep in Dixie's arms, the sight made him smile and he made his way over to the bed. 'Put her to bed Jeff love,' Dixie whispered.

'I won't be long.' Jeff picked Sophia up and carried her to her own bedroom where he gently put her in bed and pulled the covers up to her shoulders.

'Daddy,' she said in a sleepy voice.

'Go back to sleep my little princess.'

'Okay.' Sophia turned over and snuggled down underneath her quilt. Jeff stayed with Sophia until she went back to sleep and he kissed her on the head.

'Sleep well my little princess.' Jeff quietly closed the door and then went back to Dixie.

Dixie sat on the bed in her pyjamas, it felt like she'd had the longest week imaginable and she felt so in need of rest. Jeff came back in and sat next to her. 'I think I have another sleepy princess to put to bed.'

'I think you're right there.' Dixie stood up and pulled the covers back on the bed, she got in and put her feet up.

'Dixie, you've got swollen ankles.'

'I know, it is fluid retention, it goes down after resting for a while.'

'I know what else will help you.'

'What?' Jeff sat in front of Dixie and gently picked up her left foot, he massaged her ankle and all the way down to her toes. Dixie sighed happily, Jeff massaging her feet was making her feel better and she lay back on her pillow and watched him work, he moved onto her right foot and gave it the same treatment. Dixie yawned, Jeff massaging her feet was making her feel very relaxed and sleepy. 'That's better princess, I want you off your feet this weekend.'

'Yes sir,' Dixie said and laughed.

'It is only because I care about you princess.'

'I know, you're very sweet Jeff, thank you, I feel so much better now.'

'Good.' Dixie put her feet under the covers and turned onto her left side; it really was the only position in which she could sleep now, any other way was just too uncomfortable.

Jeff made himself comfortable next to Dixie, he put his arm around her and rested his hand on her bump. Most nights ended up like this, with Dixie falling asleep on him, a lot of the time she was too tired for anything but sleep. He didn't mind, Dixie was getting bigger and she needed all the rest that she could get. He wanted her to be well rested when the baby arrived and if that meant sacrificing making love then so be it. Dixie and the baby's health had to come first, he wouldn't do anything to endanger them as he loved them both so very much. Jeff spent a lot of his time watching Dixie sleep whenever he didn't have to be in work, it reassured him that she was okay and so was the baby. He had come to realise that their little bug often slept when Dixie did, it made him smile, sometimes babies kept their mum awake at night by moving about but their baby was being very good and sleeping at night, Jeff wondered if that would continue when he was born. Jeff made little circles with his fingers over Dixie's bump and lay down on his pllow, he looked at Dixie and watched her sleep until he couldn't keep his eyes open any more.


	37. Chapter Thirty-Seven

**Author: Raven Shadowrose**

**Rating: M**

**Pairing: ?/?**

**Summary: Sequel to Epiphany, Jeff and Dixie are trying to have a baby, what happens when it is likely to be more difficult than they first thought?**

**Disclaimer: I do not know or own any of the characters from Casualty, any original characters and the story are my property and I do not give permission for either of them to be used.**

**A/N: This is a direct sequel to Epiphany, please read that first to understand this story :) Reviews are welcome :)**

**Thank you to BeethovenRIP and chan. nelson4444 for your reviews, more squishy time for you all :) **

* * *

**Chapter Thirty-Seven.**

Dixie had reached twenty-five weeks now, she was almost reaching her third trimester and it was just over two weeks to Christmas. They'd been buying presents for the kids and wrapping them before hiding them away so that they wouldn't find them. Jeff couldn't wait to see their faces when they opened their presents, it was their first Christmas here with him and Dixie and he wanted to make it special for them. He was going to get a big tree and decorate it with lots of decorations, lights and tinsel. Jeff couldn't wait to see the kids open their presents and do all of the things that he had missed over the years of not being with the kids. He was going to make up for it now and spend all of Christmas day with them. He'd already booked the day off and so had Dixie, he wanted to spend it with her too. She'd just been for her appointment and he had booked the day off to go with her and support her through it. The midwife was very pleased with Dixie and the baby's progress, she was very healthy and the baby's heartbeat was strong and he was growing at a good rate. From twenty-eight weeks onward her appointments would increase to once a fortnight and he would be with her as often as he could. The hospital had been very good about arranging them for when he wasn't working so he could be with Dixie at them all.

Jeff was trying to support Dixie as much as he could, he was still taking on more of the housework and doing his bit to help Dixie out. He made sure that she put her feet up and got enough rest, he found that baths helped Dixie to relax so he would run her one almost every night just so she could relax and unwind after her working day. Sometimes she would ask about how Tamzin was getting on and what he had done at work that day. Jeff thought about not telling her but it made Dixie feel better if he told her what was going on at the hospital and how they all missed her. He'd lost count of the times when people asked how Dixie and the baby were getting on, everyone missed her a lot so he took pleasure in telling them that both Dixie and the baby were getting on well. It pleased him to know that Dixie was so well loved in the department and she would be welcomed back with open arms when her maternity leave was over. He had another scan picture to add to his collection in his locker, he loved looking at them and keeping them close to him always.

Dixie looked through the latest pictures from the scan, her little boy was very healthy and growing just as he should be. 'Come on then princess, let's go.' Dixie held onto Jeff's arm and they left the clinic together.

'Jeff, can we go in and see everyone?'

'Of course we can.'

'Thanks love.' Dixie missed working with her team, she hoped that popping in to see them would help her feel better. She was still holding onto Jeff's arm as they went into the ambulance station. 'Dixie,' she heard Tamzin call when she went into the station. 'You're huge, are you sure you've not got two babies in there?'

'No, just one very big baby boy.'

'Takes after his dad in that respect.'

'Hey, I am not big.' Dixie chuckled at the expression on Jeff's face and then she kissed him.

'Look at you two, you're so cute. How are you feeling Dixie?'

'Honestly, tired and my body aches in places I didn't even know it was possible for it to ache.'

'I hope Jeffrey is looking after you.'

'He is.'

'Good, if he doesn't then I'll tell him off.'

'There's no need, really, he's been doing a lot of work around the house. How are you doing here?'

'Good, glad to hear it, you look as if you need someone helping you. Everything is fine Dixie, don't worry, I'll look after this place until you get back.'

'Thanks, it is good to know that I have someone to rely on.' Dixie hugged Tamzin, the young woman looked as if she had everything under control.

Jeff watched Dixie talking with Tamzin, it was good for Dixie to be here and visit for a while, he knew that she missed the place still. She had fitted in well at ambulance control and was quite happy with most of the people she worked with. Louise was turning out to be a constant pain but Dixie was ignoring her and he was glad about that, she did not need stress or anything that could affect her or the baby in a negative way. He was also glad that Dixie was sitting down, she found it hard to stand for long periods of time and he made sure that she had her feet up for a lot of the time, it helped with the fluid retention and swelling that she sometimes got in her feet and legs. Jeff was keeping a very close on Dixie and the swelling she was experiencing in case it got worse. He hadn't told Dixie as she would say that he was only fussing and worrying over nothing. Jeff didn't want anything to happen to Dixie or the baby and he would keep a watch on them at all times.

Dixie enjoyed talking to Tamzin but she'd got a shout and Jeff had insisted that they go home. He had been fussing around her a lot lately and she was letting him, it felt nice to be cared for and looked after, there were times when she felt so tired and worn out so having Jeff with her and doing things to help her was a huge relief. Dixie was sat on the sofa and resting with her feet up, she was relieved that most of the shopping for the baby was done now. His pram had arrived and she'd stocked up on baby wipes, nappies and all of the other essentials that she was going to need in the first weeks of their little one being born. Dixie had an idea that she wasn't going to want to move too much the first couple of days after having the baby and that a lot of her time would be spent looking after and feeding the baby and she didn't want to have to go out if she could help it. Having supplies in the house made her feel more ready and organised and less apprehensive about what was to come. Sometimes she worried about looking after the baby, what if she couldn't feed him or look after him? What if she couldn't give him what he needed? Whenever she worried then Jeff would make her feel better, he would remind her that she could do it, that she would be a very good mother. He would just hold her close so she could take comfort from his warmth, she liked listening to his heartbeat as it calmed her down whenever she was feeling stressed.

Jeff sat down next to Dixie and he kissed her on the cheek. 'How is my beautiful Dixie?'

'I'm okay Jeff.'

'Good.'

'I'm looking forward to Christmas, I can't wait to see the kids open their presents, I think they will like what we've bought for them.'

'Me too princess, do you think I've spoiled them a little bit?'

'A little bit yes, you are their dad and it is the first time you've spent Christmas with them in a long time, you're entitled to spoil them Jeff.'

'Oh good, I'm glad you think so Dixie.'

'I do, I want you to enjoy Christmas with those kids of yours.'

'Sophia is being awfully secretive over what she's got you for Christmas Dixie.'

'Let her have her secrets, she's entitled to them. If she wants to keep what she's got me a secret then she should be allowed to do that.'

I know. She loves you so much Dixie.'

'I like that she does, I love her too.'

'I often wonder if I should have tried harder to get to see them.'

'Jeff, listen to me, those kids love you, I see it all the time.'

'Thanks Dixie, I'm going to be there for our baby no matter what, I won't make the same mistakes again.'

'Jeff, are you worried about becoming a dad again?'

'A little bit.'

'You will be an excellent dad Jeff, please do not worry.'

'I love you princess, I just don't want to let you or little bug down.'

'You won't do that.'

'How do you know?'

'I just do.' Jeff rested his head against Dixie's, it made him feel good that she believed in him, he wouldn't let her down, he would reward her faith in him by being there whenever she needed him.

Dixie lay back on the sofa as Jeff rubbed moisturiser into her bump, she had noticed some stretch marks appearing on her skin and read that moisturising her belly often helped. She knew that she was going to have some there no matter how much moisturiser she put on, but, she liked Jeff carefully massaging her belly in this way. Dixie sometimes got him to do this when the baby was restless, it calmed him down and she was sure that it sent him to sleep. Sometimes he would kick whenever Jeff touched her belly, she saw the love in Jeff's eyes whenever he felt the baby kick. Sometimes he would rest his head against her belly and sing to their son, she would watch him and stroke his hair as he did this and it was a way for all three of them to be together. Dixie wondered if Jeff felt like he was missing out because he couldn't feel everything that she could, she vowed to keep him as involved as possible right until she gave birth to their son.

Jeff noted that Dixie had been encouraging him to spend time with Sophia and John, he didn't want them to feel left out just because they were having a new baby. He talked with them and encouraged them to ask any questions that they had about the baby. He'd given them another picture of their brother and sat with them just playing games or helping them with their homework. Jeff felt as if he was making up for all the time that he had lost while they were in London and he was still in Holby. He let them know how much he cared for them and loved them, he always made sure that he was there if ever they needed him. Jeff wanted Sophia and John to understand that he wouldn't love them any less just because the new baby was coming, he would love all of his children exactly the same. Jeff finished rubbing the moisturiser into Dixie's belly and he put the lid back on the bottle. 'How does that feel?'

'Lovely, thanks Jeff.'

'A pleasure as always Princess Dixie.'

'I think our little bug is asleep again, you know just how to relax us both.'

'I am glad that I can do this for you Dixie. I like taking care of you.'

'I like it too.'

'Good. The kids will be back soon.'

'I know, they'll be wanting to see the latest picture we have of their baby brother.'

'I know, I am glad we've been getting them copies, it is a good way for them to feel closer to the baby. Is there anything you need Dixie?'

'No love, I'm happy here for now.'

'Glad to hear it princess. Is there anything you want to eat for our tea?'

'No, you pick something love.'

'All right, I will.' Jeff kissed Dixie gently on the lips and then blew a kiss to her as he left the lounge to go into the kitchen, she caught it and then blew him one back. He caught the kiss in his hand and held it to his chest, just above his heart. Jeff smiled and started to think about what he was going to make for tea, he was looking forward to sitting down with the people he loved the most for a family dinner.


	38. Chapter Thirty-Eight

**Author: Raven Shadowrose**

**Rating: M**

**Pairing: ?/?**

**Summary: Sequel to Epiphany, Jeff and Dixie are trying to have a baby, what happens when it is likely to be more difficult than they first thought?**

**Disclaimer: I do not know or own any of the characters from Casualty, any original characters and the story are my property and I do not give permission for either of them to be used.**

**A/N: This is a direct sequel to Epiphany, please read that first to understand this story :) Reviews are welcome :)**

**Thank you to BeethovenRIP and chan. nelson4444 for your reviews, I hope you like this one :) **

**Please note: Twas the night before Christmas belongs to Clement Clarke Moore and not to me. I claim no ownership of the piece, I am just using it in this story :)**

* * *

**Chapter Thirty-Eight.**

Dixie sat in the bath and rested her head against the pillow that was attached to the side. She liked lying in the bath as it took the weight off her feet and soothed her aching back and legs. She was twenty-seven weeks and rapidly approaching her third trimester and the end of her pregnancy. Her due date wasn't for another thirteen weeks but Dixie was aware that her baby might not stay in her stomach that long and he might come early. She didn't mind if he arrived a little bit early as long as he arrived after thirty-seven weeks as then he would be considered full term. Dixie smiled when she felt her son moving around in her stomach, he often moved around when she was relaxing in the bath. Dixie had noticed that whenever she put her hand on her stomach then he would kick at it, she had shown Jeff and he had taken great delight in putting his hand on her stomach and feeling the little kicks that came from their son. Dixie was pleased that Jeff was bonding with their son and that he had a connection with him, she couldn't wait to see what Jeff would be like with their baby once he was born.

Dixie knew why Jeff had told her to go for a bath, he was wrapping her presents, the bath was just a ruse to get her out of the way so he could wrap up the gifts in secret. Dixie thought that it was sweet that Jeff was going to so much effort for her and wanted her to be surprised when she opened her presents. She'd wrapped Jeff's presents a long time ago and hidden them where he wouldn't find them, she really hoped that he would like what she had bought him. Dixie wanted Jeff to enjoy Christmas with the kids, he had spent so long away from them and missing Christmas with them that she really wanted this one to make up for all those that he had missed out on. She would make it as perfect as possible for Jeff and the kids.

Jeff carefully put the finishing touches to the gifts that he had wrapped for Dixie, Sophia and John were watching television downstairs and he hid Dixie's gifts back in the wardrobe. Jeff wasn't sure if Sophia believed in Santa now, he was certain that John didn't but just in case Sophia did he wasn't going to put the presents under the tree until the kids had gone to bed. He really wanted the kids to enjoy Christmas, he had gone out of his way to make it special for them. He had bought lots of nice food for them to eat and he planned to spend the day with Dixie, Sophia and John. Jeff wanted the day to be about their family and he had taken great care to plan it so that the day would go off without a hitch.

Once Jeff had put Dixie's gifts back in their hiding place he went into their room and saw her sat on their bed brushing her hair. 'Hey princess, how are you feeling?'

'I feel good, very relaxed. My hair feels so much thicker now that I'm pregnant.'

'Good, I'm glad my princess. It's the hormones, one you've had our little bug then it will go back to normal.'

'I know, it won't be long now.'

'Yeah, are you going to be all right princess?'

'What do you mean Jeff?'

'You're getting bigger and I know it is hard for you being on your feet. I see how tired you are when you come back from work. Are you resting enough?'

'Yes love, I am, don't worry.'

'It's my job to worry Dixie, you're my princess and I love you.'

'I'm okay Jeff and so is our little bug, I love you too.'

'That's good to know.' Jeff placed his hand on Dixie's belly and he kissed her gently, he put his arms around Dixie and held her close.

Dixie snuggled close to Jeff and took comfort from the warmth of his body. 'I'm looking forward to Christmas Jeff.'

'Me too Dix.'

'It is nice to have the kids in the house.'

'I know, I love them so much. Do you think they will like their presents?'

'Of course they will Jeff.'

'I hope so.'

'Your kids love you Jeff and they will love the presents that you've bought for them.'

'How do you know just how to make me feel better?'

'I know you and how much you worry about the people you care about the most.'

'Thanks Dixie.'

'You deserve it Jeff.' Dixie put her arms around Jeff. 'I think the bump is getting in the way,' Dixie said and laughed. 'We might have to find a different way of hugging.'

'I'm sure we can improvise my Dixie.'

'That we can, we're very good at that.' Dixie smiled and kissed Jeff. 'Come on love, we should go and put the kids to bed.'

'I know, they'll want to be up for Santa.' Dixie took Jeff's arm and they went to sort the kids out for bed.

Jeff sat on the chair in John's room and he waited for his son to come back from the bathroom, he wanted to talk to him. John came in and climbed into his bed, Jeff went over and sat by his son. 'Are you looking forward to Christmas?'

'I am, Sophia is too.'

'I'm looking forward to spending it with you and your sister.'

'Dad?'

'Yes John.'

'Did you miss us at Christmas when we used to live with mum?'

'Always, you were never far from my thoughts.'

'Sophia used to miss you a lot, I did too.'

'I'm sorry I wasn't there for you son, I'm going to make it up to you, I promise.'

'It's okay dad, you're here for us now.'

'I want you to do something for me John, Dixie is getting bigger with the baby and she's going to need some more help as she gets further into the pregnancy. If I'm not here for any reason will you look after her for me?'

'Of course I will dad, I like Dixie, she is kind to us and makes nice food.'

'She likes you too, thank you, I know I can rely on you to take care of Dixie for me. Goodnight my son, I am so proud of you.'

'Goodnight dad.' Jeff hugged his son and then turned when someone knocked on the door, Dixie poked her head around the door and then came in. 'Hi love.'

'Hi Dixie, is everything all right?'

'Yes love, Sophia is asking for you.'

'All right.' Jeff wished John goodnight again and left the room, he smiled when he heard Dixie talking to John about Christmas and wishing him goodnight. He felt more relaxed now that he knew John would take care of Dixie if he wasn't around or had to go out.

Jeff went into Sophia's room and closed the door behind him. 'Hello my little princess.'

'Hello daddy.' He sat down on Sophia's bed and smiled at her. 'Daddy, are you going to put out some milk and cookies out for Santa?'

'Of course we will.'

'Thank you.'

'You're welcome my little princess.'

'Don't forget the carrots for Rudolph and the reindeer.'

'Of course not, we can't forget those.'

'Daddy, will you tell me a story?'

'Of course I will.'

'Will you hug me?'

'Yes, I will.' Jeff climbed into Sophia's bed and held her. 'Are you sitting comfortably?'

'Yes daddy.'

'Then I'll begin.' Jeff closed his arms around Sophia and began his story.

Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the house  
Not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse.  
The stockings were hung by the chimney with care,  
In hopes that St Nicholas soon would be children were nestled all snug in their beds,  
While visions of sugar-plums danced in their heads.  
And mamma in her 'kerchief, and I in my cap,  
Had just settled our brains for a long winter's nap.

When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter,  
I sprang from the bed to see what was the matter.  
Away to the window I flew like a flash,  
Tore open the shutters and threw up the sash.

The moon on the breast of the new-fallen snow  
Gave the lustre of mid-day to objects below.  
When, what to my wondering eyes should appear,  
But a miniature sleigh, and eight tinny reindeer.

With a little old driver, so lively and quick,  
I knew in a moment it must be St Nick.  
More rapid than eagles his coursers they came,  
And he whistled, and shouted, and called them by name!

'Now Dasher! now, Dancer! now, Prancer and Vixen!  
On, Comet! On, Cupid! on, on Donner and Blitzen!  
To the top of the porch! to the top of the wall!  
Now dash away! Dash away! Dash away all!'

As dry leaves that before the wild hurricane fly,  
When they meet with an obstacle, mount to the sky.  
So up to the house-top the coursers they flew,  
With the sleigh full of Toys, and St Nicholas too.

And then, in a twinkling, I heard on the roof  
The prancing and pawing of each little hoof.  
As I drew in my head, and was turning around,  
Down the chimney St Nicholas came with a bound.

He was dressed all in fur, from his head to his foot,  
And his clothes were all tarnished with ashes and soot.  
A bundle of Toys he had flung on his back,  
And he looked like a peddler, just opening his pack.

His eyes-how they twinkled! his dimples how merry!  
His cheeks were like roses, his nose like a cherry!  
His droll little mouth was drawn up like a bow,  
And the beard of his chin was as white as the snow.

The stump of a pipe he held tight in his teeth,  
And the smoke it encircled his head like a wreath.  
He had a broad face and a little round belly,  
That shook when he laughed, like a bowlful of jelly!

He was chubby and plump, a right jolly old elf,  
And I laughed when I saw him, in spite of myself!  
A wink of his eye and a twist of his head,  
Soon gave me to know I had nothing to dread.

He spoke not a word, but went straight to his work,  
And filled all the stockings, then turned with a jerk.  
And laying his finger aside of his nose,  
And giving a nod, up the chimney he rose!

He sprang to his sleigh, to his team gave a whistle,  
And away they all flew like the down of a thistle.  
But I heard him exclaim, 'ere he drove out of sight,  
'Happy Christmas to all, and to all a good-night!'

Dixie had come in towards the end of Jeff's story and she smiled at him and Sophia, Jeff gently lay Sophia down on her pillow, pulled her quilt up to keep her warm and kissed her on the head. 'Goodnight my little princess.'

'Goodnight daddy.'

'I love you sweetheart.'

'Daddy, I can hear sleigh bells.'

'I can too princess.' Dixie smiled and took Jeff's hand when he came over to her, they left Sophia's room and closed the door quietly. 'That was so sweet Jeffrey.'

'My mum used to tell me that story on Christmas Eve every year.'

'Now you're telling it to your daughter.'

'I am, it feels good. Come on Mrs Collier, Santa is on his way.' Dixie and Jeff put all of the presents under the tree and left some crumbs and a glass that had a little bit of milk left in the bottom. Dixie understood that Jeff wanted to keep Sophia's belief in Santa alive a little bit longer. Once they were certain that everything was perfect Dixie and Jeff went into their bedroom and got themselves ready for bed, they were looking forward to celebrating Christmas together with the kids in the morning. Dixie cuddled up to Jeff and smiled at him, she loved him and the kids with all of her heart, she was going to make sure that tomorrow was wonderful and enjoyable for all of them. Dixie closed her eyes and snuggled as close as she could to Jeff, he was warm and she loved the feeling of his arms around her, protecting her and their baby and holding her close. 'Goodnight Jeffrey, I love you.'

'I love you too princess, goodnight my Dixie. Goodnight Little Bug.'

'Goodnight peanut.' Dixie smiled and put her hand on top of Jeff's where it lay on her belly, life was perfect.


	39. Chapter Thirty-Nine

**Author: Raven Shadowrose**

**Rating: M**

**Pairing: ?/?**

**Summary: Sequel to Epiphany, Jeff and Dixie are trying to have a baby, what happens when it is likely to be more difficult than they first thought?**

**Disclaimer: I do not know or own any of the characters from Casualty, any original characters and the story are my property and I do not give permission for either of them to be used.**

**A/N: This is a direct sequel to Epiphany, please read that first to understand this story :) Reviews are welcome :)**

**Thank you to BeethovenRIP, olivia. c. king1 and chan. nelson4444 for your reviews, tis Christmas day, enjoy the squishy. **

* * *

**Chapter Thirty-Nine.**

Dixie lay in bed, it was still early and Jeff was asleep, there were times when their son would wake her up with his kicking or sometimes her legs would feel like they had a life of their own and a bit jittery. It was just restless leg syndrome and it stopped after a little while. Dixie yawned, she was glad that she had the day off as she was feeling a bit on the tired side, waking up early and working all day was beginning to take its toll on her and she was glad of the break even if it was only for a day. Dixie heard the creaking of the door as it opened and Sophia and John poked their heads around it. Sophia came over and stood by the bed. 'Morning mummy Dixie.'  
'Morning Sophia, morning John. What are you doing awake?'  
'We want to open our presents.'  
'I see, I'm afraid that your daddy is still asleep.'  
'Oh, never mind then.'  
'Though if you were to wake him up then we could go down, have some breakfast and open all of the presents.'  
'Can we?' Dixie smiled and moved her legs over the end of the bed.  
'John, will you help me up?' Dixie found it hard to get out of bed sometimes now that her belly was getting bigger and usually she relied on Jeff to help her up. John held out his hand and Dixie put hers in it as she stood up. 'Thank you.'  
'You're welcome Dixie.' Dixie smiled at John and she made sure that she was steady on her feet before she moved towards the door. 'Wait for me kids, I want to see this.'  
'Okay mummy Dixie.' Dixie chuckled, she was looking forward to watching the kids wake Jeff up.

Dixie quickly went to the bathroom and then came back in to find Sophia and John still waiting for her. 'Okay kids, wake up your dad.' Dixie stood back as the kids moved near to the bed and then jumped on it.  
'Daddy, daddy wake up!' Sophia shouted as she jumped up and down on the bed. Dixie started laughing when Jeff opened his eyes and looked at the kids. 'What is going on, it is too early, go back to bed.'  
'It is not too early daddy, it is eight in the morning, Santa has been and left us all presents.'  
'Five more minutes.' Sophia looked distinctly unimpressed that Jeff was making her wait so she decided that stealing the quilt was the best option, Dixie was relieved that Jeff had gone to bed wearing proper clothes instead of just his boxers like usual.  
'Daddy, wake up.' Dixie started laughing again when Jeff opened his eyes, he had a very put out look his face, she was glad that she had gone to the bathroom as she wasn't sure her bladder would take the pressure of laughing and the baby as well.

Jeff looked at Dixie, she really was laughing at him, Sophia had put the quilt behind her and she had a smile on her face, he quickly grabbed hold of Sophia and started to tickle her. John had quickly moved out of the way before he could grab him too. Sophia giggled and squirmed as she tried to get away from him. 'Stop it daddy,' Sophia said and giggled some more. Jeff stilled his fingers and then let Sophia go. 'Go downstairs and wait for us, I'll get dressed and then we can open presents.'  
'Okay daddy.' Jeff waited until John and Sophia left the room and then he turned to Dixie.  
'I saw you laughing at me Dixie Collier.'  
'I couldn't help it, it was just too funny.'  
'I suppose you put them up to it.'  
'No, it was all their idea, I just didn't stop them.'  
'You're a naughty woman.'  
'Are you a grumpy Jeffrey this morning?'  
'Maybe, it might have something to do with being jumped on.' Dixie chuckled and hugged Jeff.  
'My grumpy Jeffrey, come on love, let's go and have some breakfast.'  
'Can I have bacon?'  
'Seeing as you've had an early morning wake up call then yes, you can have bacon.'  
'All right, some sausage would help me feel even better.'  
'Don't push it Jeffrey.' Jeff knew that Dixie was joking, he heard the mirth and humour in her voice. Jeff held Dixie's hand as they walked downstairs together, he was looking forward to the day ahead.

Dixie made everyone breakfast and she ate some toast, there were still days when she felt a bit queasy and toast helped her to settle her stomach. Jeff made sure that she was sitting down, she was content to let him put the turkey in the oven while she sat down and rested. The kids went upstairs to clean their teeth and they quickly came back down again. 'Mummy Dixie, can we open our presents now?'  
'Of course you can sweet pea.' Dixie held onto Jeff's hand as she got up and then they sat on the sofa together as the kids started opening their presents. She was excited and couldn't wait for them to see what their presents were. They had bought them a mix of small and large presents. Dixie watched as Sophia opened one of the smaller gifts and then smiled. 'It is a little dolphin on a chain, thank you mummy Dixie and daddy.'  
'You're welcome. I have a little dolphin on a chain too, my dad gave it to me and told me that it would protect me. Your little dolphin will do the same for you.'  
'Will you put it on for me?'  
'Of course I will.' Dixie gently fastened the chain around Sophia's neck and then put her hair back for her. Dixie watched Sophia open the rest of her gifts, she had a mix of chocolate and sweets and a new art kit with lots of professional paints and pens in. It had been expensive but Sophia had been getting into art and drawing in a big way and the look on her face when she saw it was very worth it. 'I will be able to do lots of special paintings with this, thank you mummy Dixie, thank you daddy.' Sophia hugged them both and sat looking through her presents, she looked happy and it made Dixie happy to see her looking so pleased.

Jeff sat near John as he opened his presents, he had the same mix of chocolate and sweets but they'd bought him a new football, the latest kit of his favourite football team with his name on the back and a new pair of football boots. Jeff smiled at the overjoyed look on John's face, his son really loved football and Jeff knew that they had made his day by buying him the new kit. 'If you like we can take the football out for a kick around later.'  
'Yes dad, I would like that very much. Thank you.' Jeff hugged John, he was so proud that his kids were good mannered and grateful for the gifts that they had received.  
'Daddy,' Sophia said from where she was sat. 'You and mummy Dixie should open your presents now.'  
'Okay my little princess.' Jeff went over to the tree and picked up the gifts that John and Sophia had wrapped up for them, he noticed that one of the gifts had both their names on. Jeff had noticed that the kids had been very secretive over the past few weeks and were always working on something when they came home from work but nobody was ever allowed to see.

Dixie took the larger gift from Jeff and they opened it together, when they got the wrapping off they saw a large photo frame inside that had been filled with different pictures of them all from when they had visited places together. The kids had obviously taken the pictures that she hadn't had time to get a photo album for and put them together to make this gift for them. Dixie looked at Jeff and she saw the emotion in his eyes, he obviously loved the present as much as she did. She picked up another gift and opened it, it only had her name on it. Inside was a set of baby clothes; hat, jumper, a little scarf and some booties that had obviously been knitted by hand. Dixie felt tears in her eyes, she knew that Sophia had learned to knit quickly but she hadn't expected to receive a gift like this. 'Sophia, you made these?'  
'John helped me, he sewed them together while I knitted the parts.' Dixie hugged both John and Sophia, their gift to her had been so thoughtful.  
'Thank you, both of you, your little brother is so very lucky to have you.'  
'Mummy Dixie, why are you crying?'  
'Because I'm happy sweet pea.' Dixie wiped the tears from her eyes and hugged both of the kids close to her again. Dixie smiled at Jeff as he handed her a very large bunch of roses, she opened her other gifts from him which contained a bottle of her favourite perfume, some chocolate and some of her favourite bubble bath. 'Because mummy deserves to be spoiled too.' Dixie kissed Jeff and then hugged him, she had noticed her bubble bath was running out but hadn't had time to replace it. Jeff had made her happy by getting her some more so she could unwind in the bath.

Jeff watched the scene in front of him unfold and he smiled, Dixie was so happy with her present and he picked up the one that had his name on it. He wondered what they had got for him as he took the wrapping paper off the present. Jeff found himself holding a little book, they had obviously decorated it themselves and he opened it to find himself looking at pages that were decorated with pictures they had drawn of their favourite memories of times they had spent with him and a list of reasons why he was the best dad in the world. Jeff felt a tear escape his eye, they had put so much work into their presents and he loved them for it. 'Come here kids.' Jeff hugged both Sophia and John tight. 'I love you both so very much.' Jeff was feeling quite overwhelmed by emotion and he felt Dixie's arms wrap themselves around him and hold him too. He was glad to have the people he loved the most around him on this day. Jeff picked up the gifts that Dixie had bought for him; some aftershave and the Spooks DVD set that he had been talking about for ages, she'd also bought him a bottle of the beer that he liked so much. He was looking forward to sitting down and relaxing with it later on, once the kids had gone to bed.

Dixie relaxed on the sofa as Jeff put the finishing touches to the dinner, the smell of the turkey was making her stomach grumble and she was looking forward to eating. The kids were quietly watching the television. She was still thinking about the gifts that they had made, it warmed her heart when she thought of the baby clothes that they had made. She noticed that John had given Sophia a little tub of handmade bath bombs and some soap and Sophia had given John a painting that she'd done of a footballer scoring a goal and some of his favourite rocky road chocolate that she'd made herself. She loved the little family that she had found herself surrounded by. The day had been lovely and she was looking forward to eating as her sickness had gone and sharing dinner with Jeff and the kids.

Jeff finished putting the dinner onto the plates, he made sure that everything was perfect and then he went into the lounge. 'Okay everyone, dinner is ready.' Jeff helped Dixie up and then joined the kids in the kitchen. Once everyone was sat down they started eating. 'Thanks for cooking Jeff.'  
'It's my pleasure princess.' Jeff tucked into his own dinner and watched in satisfaction as everyone around him seemed to be enjoying the food that he had made for them. He was really enjoying being around his little family, the joy that he had felt from receiving his gifts from Dixie and the kids hadn't left him yet and he was still very happy.

Dixie's mind wandered over the presents that they had bought for the son that was yet to be born, just because he was in her belly still didn't mean that they weren't going to buy him some presents. They had bought him a teddy and some bedding for his cot, in about three months time he would be with them and he would be using the presents they had bought for him. Dixie was excited, they had everything they needed for their Little Bug, it was all waiting for him when he decided to enter the world. For now she would enjoy the time that she had with Jeff and the kids, she knew that Jeff had asked the kids to look out for her and it made her feel cared for and loved. Dixie looked around the table at her family, she loved them all so very much and she knew that they loved her too.


	40. Chapter Forty

**Author: Raven Shadowrose**

**Rating: M**

**Pairing: ?/?**

**Summary: Sequel to Epiphany, Jeff and Dixie are trying to have a baby, what happens when it is likely to be more difficult than they first thought?**

**Disclaimer: I do not know or own any of the characters from Casualty, any original characters and the story are my property and I do not give permission for either of them to be used.**

**A/N: This is a direct sequel to Epiphany, please read that first to understand this story :) Reviews are welcome :)**

**Thank you to BeethovenRIP, olivia. c. king1 and chan. nelson4444 for your reviews, more Collier squishiness :) **

* * *

**Chapter Forty.**

The new year had passed very uneventfully for Jeff and Dixie, they spent it together and just cuddled up on the sofa watching the celebrations around the country on the television with Little Abs sat at their feet. Dixie wasn't able to celebrate much as she was well into her twenty-eighth week and being on her feet was hard enough at work so he wanted her to rest whenever she had the chance. Jeff was quite happy cuddling up to Dixie on the sofa and just being with her throughout the evening. Later on they watched the fireworks out of their bedroom window, he had stood behind Dixie with his hands on her belly when the clock signalled midnight and the first minutes of the new year ticked by. It was a new year now and it was going to start brilliantly with the birth of their child in eight weeks time. It amazed Jeff how quickly the weeks had passed and how soon it had got to Dixie finishing her time working at ambulance dispatch and starting her rest period at home before giving birth. Jeff was relieved, he had seen how worn out Dixie was after working all day at the dispatch centre even though she wasn't on her feet. Louise had continued to be her usual self all the time that Dixie had been working there and for the most part Dixie had ignored her and let anything that she said go over her head.

It made Jeff happy that Dixie was seeing the midwife every two weeks, he just wanted her and their Little Bug to be healthy and taken care of. Every time that they saw the midwife it made him happy that she was pleased with the progress that Dixie and the baby were making. The pregnancy wasn't totally problem free, Dixie sometimes had trouble sleeping but putting a pillow under her belly seemed to help so he had bought her a special cushion that she used for supporting her bump. The morning after Dixie struggled sleeping she was always cranky and Jeff had to be careful not to upset her as her hormones meant that she got emotional and cried easily. He was being patient with Dixie though, she was carrying his child and he wanted to make the time as easy as possible for her.

Jeff found that massaging Dixie's belly and back helped her to relax in the evening and calmed her so that she could sleep. Jeff was so proud of Sophia and John and the way that they were continuing to help Dixie out around the house, they loved her and the idea of looking after her appealed to them. He'd talked to the kids about seeing their mum now that she was a lot better, but, they hadn't talked about it since as the kids had said that they weren't ready to see her just yet. Jeff respected their decision, if they wanted to see Lucy then they would do it in their own time. He wasn't going to force them to go, it was a difficult situation and the kids had been through a difficult time, forcing them to see their mum would only make it worse.

Dixie was somewhat happy that she had finished work and the end of her pregnancy was in sight, she was bored being at home every day but it did allow her to concentrate on sewing and knitting things for the baby. She had grown bigger in the past month, she wasn't sure that it was possible for her belly to get bigger but every day that went by seemed to prove her wrong. She felt as if she was waddling about a lot of the time, how women went about their lives and worked right until they went into labour, she didn't know, perhaps they had a smaller belly than she did. Dixie still had two months to go and she found that she was having to take naps during the day as the baby kept her awake at night. She didn't mind that he was squirming about and keeping her awake, it meant that their little boy was happy and healthy. Dixie found that her back and the lower part of her stomach was beginning to hurt a lot more now, combined with needing to pee so much more again was making her feel very fed up. The bigger feeling was that she wanted to hold her son and she was getting very impatient.

The ante-natal classes had started yesterday evening and Jeff hoped that it would put Dixie's mind at rest over what was to come. Jeff had his shares of worries too, mainly about seeing Dixie in pain for a long time, how would he cope with it? The first lesson had consisted of learning about pain relief and the different types that can be used. Dixie hadn't decided fully what type she wanted to use just yet but he would support her in whatever choice she eventually made, he would be there with her through every moment no matter how long the birth took. Tamzin had taken the kids to the cinema as a treat so he could spend the evening with Dixie. Jeff had called Dixie during the day to make sure that she was all right and resting whenever she needed to, it helped to set his mind at rest that Dixie was okay. He had cooked for her and now they were snuggling up together on the sofa. 'Dixie, are you really worried about giving birth?'

'A little bit, it is normal to be nervous. What about you Jeff?'

'Me? You're the one that has to go through the hours of pain.'

'I'll be all right, I'll have you by my side.

'Count on it princess, I won't leave you for a second.'

'Thanks Jeff.'

'It's all right my princess, I want to be there.'

'We need to make sure we're prepared for the day when I go into labour. I know it isn't going to be yet but I don't want to be worrying about everything.'

'I understand, it makes sense to be prepared.'

'It does, I have put together a list of things we need and put them in as they're organised and ready.'

'That sounds like a good idea to me.'

'I packed a bag ready for me to go to hospital with, it has everything that I need for the day that I have the baby. Once the camera I ready I will put it in the bag and everything will be sorted. I'm going to leave it by the door so that we can grab it on the way out.' Jeff knew that preparing in advance was Dixie's way of setting her mind at rest and getting herself ready for giving birth. 'Is there anything else you need to do Dixie?'

'I'm going to keep a set of clothes by the bed just in case we have to get up in a hurry, will you do the same?'

'Of course I will.' Jeff stroked Dixie's hair and kissed her, he would do anything to help her get ready and feel totally prepared for going into hospital.

Dixie snuggled into Jeff's arms and took comfort from him holding her close, she closed her eyes and rested her head against his chest. Dixie gasped as a twinge of pain started at the base of her stomach and all of her muscles tightened up. 'Dixie, what's wrong? Talk to me princess.' Jeff's voice was filled with concern and she felt him put his arm around her.

'Braxton Hicks, it is just my body preparing for giving birth. We can expect them to happen from now until I give birth.'

'Do they hurt?'

'A little bit, it feels as if my muscles are squeezing and tensing up one by one.' Dixie breathed deeply through the pain and took comfort from Jeff gently rubbing her belly and whispering soothing words to her. Dixie closed her eyes and kept her breathing slow and steady and her stomach muscles relaxed again. 'It's over, phew, thank you Jeff.'

'Is there anything I can do to help you with the pain Dixie?'

'Just sit with me, they only last about thirty seconds and then it is over.'

'Have you had any of those pains before this one?'

'No, that was my first one.'

'My poor Dixie, you've got it to deal with it all, haven't you?'

'It's all part of pregnancy Jeff, it will be worth it when we have our little boy.'

'I know, I just hate to think of you in pain.' Dixie snuggled herself into Jeff's arms again, having Jeff beside her whilst her body worked through the fake contraction had helped, she hoped that Jeff being there would help her through the real ones just as much as it had today.

Jeff had been scared for a moment, he really thought that Dixie was going into labour early but he felt a lot better when he realised that it was just the Braxton Hicks and the contraction wasn't real. Jeff really wanted to stay home with Dixie but he knew what she would say to that. 'Dixie, has the pain come back?'

'No love, everything is calm again.'

'Good, glad to hear it princess.'

'Our baby is quieter these days, he's almost too big for my womb now, I can feel him squirming about but not moving as much.'

'He'll be with us soon, I can't wait.'

'I know how you feel Jeff. Our Little Bug will be upside down by now and in the right position to make his entrance into the world.'

'That's good, at least he's not going to come into the world arse first.' Dixie laughed and it made Jeff smile to hear it.

'You have a lovely turn of phrase dear Jeffrey.'

'It made you smile and laugh though.'

'I suppose it did.' Jeff put his arm around Dixie and kissed her on the head, he was glad that she was still laughing and able to smile despite being uncomfortable.

Dixie sighed happily being with Jeff made her feel safe, he was protective of her and looked after her well. 'Dix?'

'Yeah.' Dixie had drifted into her own little world when Jeff started stroking her hair, she hadn't even realised that he had been speaking to her.

'The kids are on half term in March, do you think that you will need Nadia to take on some more of the work around the house?'

'I don't know, maybe.' Nadia had been taking the kids to school and picking them up as she did when Dixie and Jeff were at work so that Dixie could lie in if the baby had kept her awake at night.

'Don't take this the wrong way princess but you're not moving about as quick these days.'

'I know I'm not. I feel like I'm waddling like a duck.'

'A very cute duck though.'

'Jeffrey, do you mind that we can't make love?'

'No princess, cuddling up to you and supporting you in my arms is enough for me.' Dixie smiled at Jeff and hugged him, she slept better when she felt Jeff's strong body resting against her back, she knew that he would always take care of her and their baby.

Jeff played with Dixie's hair as he held her. 'Do you think we've chosen the right name for him Jeff?'

'Yes, I do, don't worry princess. Another Collier is about to be born into the world.'

'If he's anything like you then I wonder how the world will cope.'

'Hey, I resent that comment. What do you mean by that anyway?'

'You do have a habit of getting yourself into trouble and then I have to rescue you and get you out of it.'

'That is so not true, I think someone is making up lies Mrs Collier.'

'I do not lie, I seem to remember someone going into a burning building and getting brought out of there in a fireman's lift by a female fire fighter.'

'Don't remind me, I thought she was a guy and that she was going to chuck me back inside for my comments about women.' Dixie laughed and Jeff pouted, he knew that it wasn't one his best moments and that Dixie had been worried about him while he was in there. They laughed about it now but at the time Dixie hadn't seen the funny side of it at all. Jeff smiled, they had come so far over the years, it made him feel quite sentimental. There was no way that he would put himself in danger like that ever again, he had too many good things in his life and he wanted to be around for a long time so that he could enjoy them.


	41. Chapter Forty-One

**Author: Raven Shadowrose**

**Rating: M**

**Pairing: ?/?**

**Summary: Sequel to Epiphany, Jeff and Dixie are trying to have a baby, what happens when it is likely to be more difficult than they first thought?**

**Disclaimer: I do not know or own any of the characters from Casualty, any original characters and the story are my property and I do not give permission for either of them to be used.**

**A/N: This is a direct sequel to Epiphany, please read that first to understand this story :) Reviews are welcome :)**

**Thank you to BeethovenRIP, olivia. c. king1 and chan. nelson4444 for your reviews, get the tissues out ladies, you might need them as I got a little bit teary whilst writing this. **

* * *

**Chapter Forty-One.**

Dixie lay quietly in bed, Jeff was cuddled up to her back and his hand was resting on her belly, she had been awake for some time but she didn't want to disturb Jeff as he was on the early shift and she wanted him to be well rested for the day ahead, she didn't want him working and driving while he was tired. The kids were on half term and she was looking after them with some help from Nadia while Jeff worked. Dixie was now thirty-eight weeks gone and two weeks from her due date but she didn't think that she was going to last that long. For the past hour or so she'd been having cramps in her stomach and pains in her back. Dixie thought that they had just been Braxton Hicks like before but now she wasn't so sure. She felt a sudden urge to go to the toilet and she moved as quickly as she could into the bathroom. Dixie sat down and relaxed, her stomach cramped up and she breathed deeply through the slight pain. She sat still and felt something slip down and out of her, Dixie slowly stood up and saw the mucus plug that had been holding her cervix closed in the toilet bowl. There was no denying it now, she was definitely in labour. 'Come on Little Bug, let's go and tell your daddy you'll be joining us soon.' Dixie made her way back into the bedroom and she sat down on the bed next to the still sleeping Jeff.

Jeff felt someone gently shaking him and he opened his eyes to see Dixie sat next to him. 'Princess, is everything all right?'

'Jeff, promise me that you won't panic.'

'Dix, telling me not to panic makes me want to panic.'

'Promise that you will stay calm.'

'Okay, I promise.'

'Our Little Bug is on his way.'

'How do you know?'

'I've been getting stomach cramps and pains in my back and they're getting stronger.' Jeff stood up and started to get dressed. 'Jeff, what are you doing?'

'We've got to get to the hospital.'

'You know as well as I do that they would just send me home. I'm still in the very early stages of labour and they won't take me until later on.'

'But Dixie, you and our Little Bug should be in hospital and monitored.'

'Jeff, calm down love. We have time before we need to run off to the hospital.'

'How are you so calm?'

'I'm just taking it all in right now, I probably won't be so calm later on.'

'Do you need me to do anything?'

'Get back into bed with me.'

'All right princess.' Jeff went to help Dixie back into bed when she gasped in pain. 'Dix?'

'Contraction.' Jeff held Dixie's hand and rubbed her back gently.

'Is that helping?'

'Lots, keep doing that.' Jeff kissed Dixie on the head and sat with her. 'It's going now, thanks for that Jeff.'

'That was about forty seconds Dixie, you are still in early labour.'

'I told you so.' Jeff smiled, despite being in labour and in pain Dixie was still very much herself.

Dixie was lying on her side with the pillow Jeff had bought her under her stomach, Jeff was stroking her back every time she had a contraction. She had tried to make Jeff go back to sleep but he refused, she was glad, she didn't much want to be alone while she was in labour. Jeff was currently stroking her hair while she rested after her last contraction. 'Dixie, I'm going to call Tamzin and let her know what is happening. I'm not going into work, I'll be with you throughout every moment.'

'Thanks Jeff.'

'No need to thank me sweetheart.' Dixie smiled and gently rubbed her belly, their little boy would be with them in a few hours time. She was nervous about giving birth but Jeff was going to be with her all of the time, she had nothing to fear with Jeff by her side.

Jeff called Tamzin, there was no way he was going into work today. 'Hello.'

'Hey Tamzin, I can't make it in today. Dixie has gone into labour and she needs someone with her.'

'Of course, I understand, I'll get someone in from the agency to cover you. How far along is she?'

'Not far, it is still early, we're staying at home for now.'

'That's probably for the best. Keep me posted, give Dixie my love.'

'I will do, thanks Tamzin.'

'You're welcome, I'll come and see you when the little one is born, bye Jeff.'

'Bye Tamzin.' Jeff put the phone down and went to sit next to Dixie, he kissed her head and stroked her hair. 'Tamzin sends her love.'

'Is she all right?'

'She's fine, it is you we need to think about.'

'I'm okay, I'm a bit hungry though.'

'I'll make you some toast, will you be all right?'

'Yeah, I'll be fine.' Jeff kissed Dixie's head again and left the room, he was happy that he could stay with her and didn't have to go into work.

Dixie ate the toast that Jeff brought to her in the break between her contractions, he'd gone to wake the kids and let them know what was going on. She felt better for having some food in her stomach even though her contractions were getting stronger and more frequent she was coping with them. Having Jeff by her side was helping her and so was focusing on the ultimate goal of holding their baby in her arms. Jeff came back into the room and sat by her side, he took Dixie's hand in his. 'The kids are having breakfast and will get themselves ready when they're finished. I've called Nadia and she's going to come over as soon as she can. How are you princess?'

'I'm all right, I'm coping. It's a bit painful but knowing that we'll be holding our little boy soon is keeping me going.'

'You're doing well Dixie, you're my brave princess.' Dixie gripped Jeff's hand as another contraction started and Dixie found that she was having to breathe through them a lot more now. Jeff tracked the time and duration of Dixie's contractions and he'd noticed that the time between contractions was getting shorter and they were lasting a lot longer than before. 'Dixie, we're going to have to go to the hospital soon. Your contractions are every four minutes and are lasting nearly a minute.'

'I know, can you help me get ready?'

'Of course I can.' Dixie stood up with Jeff's help and she got dressed in between her contractions.

Jeff picked up the bag that Dixie had packed and they slowly made their way down the stairs, he was aware that Dixie's contractions were more painful now and he wanted to make the journey as comfortable as possible for her. The kids were waiting for them when they got downstairs and Dixie hugged them both. 'Good luck Dixie,' John said and she smiled at him.

'Mummy Dixie, I can't wait to see my little brother.'

'I know sweet pea, he'll be here soon.'

'Can we come and see you when you've had the baby?'

'Of course you can.' Dixie waved at the kids and Nadia as she got into the car and she let Jeff help her put the seatbelt on. Jeff got in and started the engine, he hoped that they would make it to the hospital before Dixie gave birth to their son, he had called the maternity ward and let them know that they were coming.

Dixie concentrated on her breathing throughout the journey to the hospital and they were met by a midwife at the entrance to the maternity ward. 'Come with us Mrs Collier, we have your room ready. How are you feeling?'

'I'm okay, I think.'

'We'll get you comfortable and then we'll see how far along you are.' Dixie held onto Jeff's arm as they walked through the ward and into her room. 'If you would like to get undressed and into a nightgown, I'll be back shortly.' The midwife shut the blinds at the windows and then left Dixie and Jeff alone.

Jeff helped Dixie into her nightgown and then onto the bed, he sat by her side and put his arms around her. 'I love you princess.'

'I love you too Jeff.'

'You're very calm for how close you are to giving birth.'

'I know, would it help if I threatened your manhood?' Jeff laughed and kissed Dixie on the head.

'I think we'll leave that for later.' Jeff stroked Dixie's hair as she rested her head against his shoulder. The midwife came back in and she smiled.

'Okay, Mrs Collier, let's see how far along you are.' Jeff held Dixie's hand and stroked the back of it. 'How many weeks pregnant are you?'

'Thirty-eight.'

'Good, have you had a show and have your waters broken?'

'I've had a show but my waters are still intact.'

'All right. Have you felt your baby moving today?'

'Yes, it is how I noticed my contractions had started.'

'How far apart are your contractions?'

'Every three minutes and they last about a minute and a half.'

'I'm just going to do some checks on you and your baby, lie down for me.' Jeff watched the midwife feel Dixie's belly as she lay back on the bed. 'Good, your baby's head is engaged and in the right position for birth. I'm just going to listen to your baby's heartbeat.' Jeff squeezed Dixie's hand as their baby's heartbeat came through the monitor that the midwife held. 'Nice and strong, your labour is progressing nicely. I just need to see how dilated you are.' The midwife did an internal exam and made some notes on her clipboard. 'Okay, you're eight centimetres dilated and are starting in transition. If you need to use the gas and air then the mouthpiece is by your bed. I'll be back to check on you shortly.'

'Thank you.' Jeff kissed Dixie's head and held her close, it looked as if it was going to be a little while before Dixie gave birth.

Dixie sat back against the pillows, she was happy right now, her contractions hurt but she was dealing with them with the help of the gas and air, she was determined to make it through without needing drugs if she could. The midwife had been back at regular intervals to run some checks and make sure everything was okay. Dixie's waters had broken some time ago and she was almost ready to give birth. 'Jeff, what if I can't do this?'

'You can do this princess, I know you can.' Dixie held onto Jeff's hand, she hoped that he was right.

'Okay Mrs Collier, I need you to pant for me, don't push just yet.' Dixie followed the instructions that she was given. 'The head is out, take a moment to rest and then I'll need you to push for me.' Dixie gratefully rested her head against the pillows and looked at Jeff who was stood beside her.

'You're doing well princess, I'm so proud of you.'

'Am I?'

'Yes princess.' Dixie took comfort from Jeff being by her side and holding her hand, she really needed him right now.

Jeff watched as Dixie pushed hard to bring their baby into the world, he gently wiped away the tears that dropped from her eyes, Jeff hated Dixie being in pain and he wanted to help her get through it in any way that he could. 'You're doing well my princess, almost there now sweetheart.' He stroked Dixie's hair and whispered words of encouragement to her as she followed the midwife's instructions. Time seemed to slow down for Jeff as he watched their son slowly slip out of Dixie's body and into the midwife's hands. 'You did it princess, I'm so proud of you.' Dixie smiled at Jeff and cuddled up to him.

'Is it over, is our baby here? Is he all right?'

'Yes princess, you did very well.' Jeff heard their son cry as the midwife weighed him, cleaned him up and noted his birth time and weight on the clipboard, there certainly wasn't anything wrong with his lungs. The midwife came over with their little boy wrapped in a warm towel and handed him to Dixie. 'Congratulations, you have a healthy baby boy.' Jeff watched Dixie hold their little boy, he stopped crying the minute he was put into Dixie's arms and she held him close to her chest. Jeff realised that he was crying because he was so happy, the tears slipped down his face. 'Dixie, my princess, he's beautiful, just like his mum.' Jeff put his arms around Dixie and their baby boy. 'I love you both, so very much.'

'I love you too Jeff. I love you my Little Bug,' Dixie whispered to their son. Jeff smiled, their little boy was here and he was healthy.

Dixie felt better once the placenta had been delivered and she had the chance to clean herself up, she was sat up in bed and Jeff was holding their little boy in his arms wrapped in the blanket and dressed in the little suit and hat that the E.D staff had bought him. She loved watching how gentle he was with their newborn, he was humming a tune as he rocked their baby in his arms. Jeff looked so happy, all of the hard work had been worth it, she had the child that she had craved for so long. 'Jeff, come here love.' Jeff came over and sat on the bed. 'Being a dad suits you.'

'I am so happy princess.'

'Me too. Shall we tell him his name?'

'I personally like Little Bug.' Dixie smiled and Jeff smiled back.

'We can't call him that forever.'

'You're right.'

'Tell him his name Jeffrey.'

'Welcome to our family Samuel Matthew Arthur Collier.'

'I hope my dad is proud of me, he finally has the grandson that he'd always wanted.'

'Of course he is princess, I don't doubt that he's watching this scene with Polly and they're both smiling down us.'

'That's beautiful Jeff.' Dixie felt tears slip down her face and she cuddled up to Jeff as she yawned.

'I think my princess is tired, get some sleep sweetheart, you've worked hard today.' Dixie lay back in the pillows and felt Jeff kiss her head as she fell asleep.


	42. Chapter Forty-Two

**Author: Raven Shadowrose**

**Rating: M**

**Pairing: ?/?**

**Summary: Sequel to Epiphany, Jeff and Dixie are trying to have a baby, what happens when it is likely to be more difficult than they first thought?**

**Disclaimer: I do not know or own any of the characters from Casualty, any original characters and the story are my property and I do not give permission for either of them to be used.**

**A/N: This is a direct sequel to Epiphany, please read that first to understand this story :) Reviews are welcome :)**

**Thank you to BeethovenRIP, olivia. c. king1 and chan. nelson4444 for your reviews and support, more little bug squish, enjoy. **

* * *

**Chapter Forty-Two.**

Jeff sat in the chair by Dixie's bed with Sam in his arms, the midwife had put a cot in the room a while ago but Jeff didn't want to put him down even for a moment. The midwife had checked Sam over a few hours later and he was pleased to find out that their son was totally healthy. Sam had passed all of the newborn checks with flying colours. Jeff marvelled at the tiny fingers and hands of his son, he had forgotten how small babies could be when they were first born. It reminded him of when John and Sophia were first born, they had been tiny too. Jeff looked down at his son, he was falling in love with the tiny little being in his arms. He took in Sam's perfect features; the eyes with the long eyelashes, his tiny little nose that was so much like Dixie's and his small mouth. Jeff held his son close and kissed him on the head. 'Hello Little Bug, I'm your dad, I love you and your mummy so very much. Your mummy is a special lady, she's so brave and we're lucky to have her. She had to have an operation so she could bring you into the world.' Jeff gently rocked his son in his arms, he was amazed at how much his little one had slept since he had been born.

Dixie had worked hard to bring their boy into the world and the labour had exhausted her, she was sleeping peacefully and had been for a few hours. Jeff was so proud of Dixie and how she had given birth to Sam with only the aid of gas and air. He carefully flexed the hand that Dixie had held onto during labour, it was a bit sore where she had squeezed it during her contractions but Jeff didn't mind. Dixie had endured a lot more pain during labour and Jeff was glad that he could be there for her and support her throughout every moment. Jeff noticed that Sam was waking up and he gently stroked Sam's cheek as he gave a little cry. 'Hush Little Bug, you'll wake your mummy and she needs to rest.' Jeff stood up and walked around the room and rocked Sam in his arms, he was pleased when Sam settled down and stopped crying, it meant that he hadn't lost his touch as a dad.

Dixie opened her eyes and took in her surroundings, hospital, she remembered going into labour and giving birth to Sam. She looked around and saw Jeff stood up, he was holding their son and gently stroking his fingers. Jeff was engrossed in holding their son and talking to him, it gave Dixie a warm feeling in her heart to watch them together. She didn't want to disturb the moment so she just carried on watching Jeff and smiled. 'Jeff,' Dixie quietly called out and he turned around.

'Hey princess, how are you feeling?'

'A little bit tired, but happy. How is our little boy?'

'I think he wants a hug from his mummy.' Dixie carefully supported Sam's head as Jeff handed him to her. Jeff sat on the edge of the bed and Dixie rested against his shoulder as she held her son.

'Jeff, our little one has your eyes.'

'Do you think so?'

'I do, I would know that colour anywhere.'

'He has your nose Dix, the same cute little button nose as my lovely wife.'

'You're sweet Jeff, I love you.'

'I love you too princess.' Dixie smiled at Jeff and snuggled up to him, she was happy and her little boy seemed content lying in her arms.

'Did I hurt your hand? It looks a bit sore.'

'A little bit, it doesn't matter princess, I am sure you were in more pain.'

'I don't remember the pain, I remember the feeling of being complete the minute that Sam was placed in my arms.' Dixie stroked Jeff's hand and hoped that he wasn't in too much pain.

Jeff let the midwife in when she knocked on the door. 'Mrs Collier, you're awake, how are you feeling?'

'Tired, a little bit sore but I'm okay.'

'The pain you're feeling will ease, if you need to then you can take some ibuprofen to help in the meantime, drinking plenty of water will help you too. I need to do some basic checks to make sure that you're ready to go home.' Jeff held Sam in his arms as the midwife checked Dixie over; she took her pulse, temperature and checked Dixie's blood pressure. The midwife also took Dixie to the bathroom to make sure that she could pass urine properly and then brought her back to do an internal exam.

Once she had finished the exam the midwife wrote her findings down in Dixie's notes. 'Your uterus has begun to contract and return to its natural position, you will feel some contractions while this process continues. Breastfeeding will help encourage this to happen, it says in your notes that you are planning to breastfeed your son.'

'I am.'

'If you require any help with feeding then you can ask me at any time. Other than that I am satisfied that you and your baby are healthy and you may leave any time that you wish. I'll leave the information on caring for Sam's umbilical stump here for you to read at your leisure.'

'Thank you,' Dixie smiled at the midwife, she really was looking forward to going home.

The midwife left Jeff and Dixie alone and Jeff joined Dixie on the bed, he wanted to be near her and take care of her. Sam gave a little whimper and Jeff carefully handed him to Dixie. 'I think our little boy is hungry princess.'

'Me too.' Dixie started to undo the buttons on her nightdress; she had a few of them that undid for easy access when she needed to feed Sam. 'Do you want me to leave for a few minutes while you feed him?'

'Why?'

'Lucy didn't like me watching her when she fed either of the kids.'

'I'm not Lucy, I want you to stay.' Jeff was relieved that Dixie wanted him around while she fed Sam. He wanted to share all of these moments with her. Dixie gently encouraged Sam to latch onto her breast and she smiled as he started feeding.

'You're a natural, princess. I always knew that you would be.'

'I am glad that Sam is feeding well, it worried me that I might not be able to feed him naturally.'

'It doesn't look as if he has any complaints to me.' Jeff heard the sigh of relief that came from Dixie, he stroked Dixie's hair and watched their son take his first proper feed. Jeff felt so privileged to be allowed to watch Dixie breastfeed their son, it was a new experience for him and he loved it.

Jeff held Sam as Dixie dressed herself again, he was bit restless and seemed uncomfortable. 'I think someone needs burping.' Jeff went to hand him back to Dixie, he wanted to do it but he thought that Dixie might want to. 'Why don't you burp him Jeff?'

'Shouldn't you do it?'

'I trust you.' Jeff put a towel over his shoulder and rested Sam's chin on it as he held him securely, he gently patted Sam's back and after a couple of pats he heard him burp. 'Now who's a natural?' Jeff smiled, it pleased him that Dixie trusted him with their son. Lucy had always insisted that she be the one to take care of the kids when they were babies. Jeff was relieved that Dixie wasn't the same, he was going to be there for her and Sam and support her as much as he could.

Dixie let Jeff help her get dressed once she had finished feeding Sam, she made sure that she had everything and then zipped up her bag. There was another knock at the door and Tamzin popped her head around it. 'Hey, can I come in?'

'Of course you can,' Dixie said and smiled at Tamzin.

'Thanks. You look well, how did it go?'

'All right, I am tired but happy. They've said I can go home which is good. I want to introduce Sophia and John to their new baby brother.'

'Speaking of the little one, where is he?'

'He's behind you.' Jeff brought Sam over to Tamzin and she smiled.

'He's adorable, can I hold him?'

'Of course you can,' Jeff said and handed Sam over to Tamzin.

'Hello little one, you're so beautiful. How much did he weigh? Did you go with the names you originally thought of?'

'Seven pounds and eight ounces. We did.'

'He's so cute, congratulations you two.'

'Thanks Tamzin.' Tamzin gave Sam back to Jeff and hugged Dixie.

'Everyone in the department keeps asking after you, can I take a picture of you all to show them?' Jeff and Dixie sat together with Dixie holding Sam in her arms, Tamzin took the picture of them all and then one of Sam by himself. 'I can't wait to show everyone, they're going to love him.'

'I'll bring him in to see everyone in a couple of days when we're settled at home.'

'Good, I'll see you soon.'

'Tamzin, can you arrange for me to have some paternity leave?'

'Of course I can, it would be my pleasure.'

'Thanks.'

'You're welcome.' Tamzin said goodbye and left Jeff and Dixie alone once more.

Jeff and Dixie thanked the hospital staff that had helped them during Dixie's labour before they left the hospital. They made sure that Sam was dressed warmly and wouldn't get cold as they walked to the car. Jeff secured Sam in his car seat and double checked it to make sure that he would be safe throughout the journey, he held the door for Dixie as she got in and then he closed it again. They'd let Nadia know that they were coming home and Jeff had heard the kids in the background, they were so excited about meeting their new brother. Jeff almost drove home on auto pilot, he was so happy that their son had been born safely and Dixie was safe and on her way home with him. He had asked Tamzin for time off so that he could support Dixie in looking after Sam. Jeff wanted to be there for them both and help with getting Sam settled into a routine. He wanted to help with feeding and general care of their baby.

Dixie got out of the car and she took Sam out of his car seat, Jeff locked up the car and she put her hand on his shoulder, he turned to face her and she smiled at him. 'Jeff, I wanted to thank you.'

'What for princess?'

'For loving me and giving me the chance to be a mum.'

'You mean the world to me and I would do anything to make you happy.'

'Thank you Jeff, I love you.'

'I love you too. You've made me happy too. I am so looking forward to spending time with you and our Little Bug.'

'I am glad you're taking some time off.'

'Me too.' Jeff leaned in and gently kissed Dixie. 'Come on princess, I believe we have to introduce our little one to his brother and sister.'

'I am looking forward to this.' Dixie smiled and followed Jeff into the house.

Jeff was ambushed by Sophia and John the minute he walked into the house. 'Daddy, where's mummy Dixie. I want to see my little brother.'

'She's coming, why don't you go and sit down and then you can see your little brother.'

'Okay daddy.' Sophia ran over to the sofa and she sat down.

'Dad?'

'What is it?' Jeff listened intently to his son as he talked.

'Are Dixie and the baby all right?'

'They are fine, would you like to hold your baby brother?'

'I would like that very much. Go and join your sister.'

'Okay dad.' John went and sat with his sister as Dixie came in, he put his arm around her waist and they went over to the kids.

Dixie sat down with Sam in her arms and she smiled as John and Sophia both looked at him. 'This is Samuel Matthew Arthur Collier and he is your little brother. Would you like to hold him John?' John nodded and Dixie handed Sam to him, showing him how to support his head. 'What do you think?'

'He's so small.'

'He is, I can trust you to look after him, you're his big brother and I know that you will protect him.'

'I will.' Dixie let John hold his little brother a little longer and then she gave Sam to Sophia.

'He's so lovely and cute mummy Dixie. I love him.' Dixie smiled, she knew that John and Sophia would take care of their little brother, they were kind and caring and she had loved introducing him to them. She sensed their happiness at their little brother having the names that they had picked out as their favourites. Dixie was happy, it was a simple happiness that started in her heart and spread through her body. Her dreams of being a mum had come true, it had taken some time but now that it had happened she found the reality was much better than her dreams.

Jeff joined his family, he had watched all of the people that were precious to him together and now he wanted to spend some time with them. He hugged John and Sophia and kissed them both on the head. He was happy that they both had got to meet their little brother and the meeting had gone very well. Jeff turned to Dixie and kissed her and then the newest member of their family. The warm feeling in his heart increased, he loved them all so very much and he would protect them all, nobody would hurt them while he was around. The feeling that he was blessed came back to Jeff and he looked around at his family, he definitely felt like a very lucky man right now.


	43. Chapter Forty-Three

**Author: Raven Shadowrose**

**Rating: M**

**Pairing: ?/?**

**Summary: Sequel to Epiphany, Jeff and Dixie are trying to have a baby, what happens when it is likely to be more difficult than they first thought?**

**Disclaimer: I do not know or own any of the characters from Casualty, any original characters and the story are my property and I do not give permission for either of them to be used.**

**A/N: This is a direct sequel to Epiphany, please read that first to understand this story :) Reviews are welcome :)**

**Thank you to BeethovenRIP, olivia. c. king1 and chan. nelson4444 for your reviews and support during this story. Enjoy the chapter :) **

* * *

**Chapter Forty-Three.**

Dixie sat in the chair in the nursery beside Sam's cot as he slept, she loved watching him, they had a monitor for him so they could hear him if he woke up but she liked to sit with him while he slept. It was still sinking in that she was now a mum and had a little baby of her own to look after, the little baby she had been waiting for all of her life. Sam amazed Dixie every day with how much progress he was making, it was early days but he already looked at her and Jeff when they held him. Sam had begun to recognise their voices too, whenever she spoke to him he would turn and look at her. It pleased her that he was feeding and sleeping well, she wanted him to have the best start in life and she wanted to do everything that she could for him. She was determined to be a very good mum to Sam, just like her own mum had been to her. He was her little one and she loved him so much. Dixie gently stroked Sam's cheek as he slept, his skin was so soft and she felt his breath against her hand. 'I love you peanut, my Little Bug, everything that I had to do so you could be born was so worth it.' Dixie smiled at her son, he was perfect in every way.

It was hard work looking after a new baby, she had been back from the hospital for three days and she was a bit tired from getting up to feed Sam during the night but he was her son and she would do whatever it took to keep him safe and make sure that he is well provided for. Sam was a typical baby, he cried occasionally when he needed feeding or needed his nappy changing. Jeff was doing his best to help out with the feeding and getting Sam back to sleep when he woke up. Dixie was expressing milk so that Jeff could feed Sam with a bottle and bond with him, she thought that it was important for Jeff to get close to their son and feeding him was a way he could do that. He had taken Little Abs out for a walk with Sophia and John, it was also important for Jeff to maintain the bond he had with them both and reassure them that he loved them just as much as he always did even though there was a new baby in the house. Dixie knew that Jeff's feelings for his children wouldn't change, he would always love them.

Dixie rested her head against the top of the chair, Jeff had so much love for all of his children, she saw it whenever he was with them. Jeff has a big heart and loves easily, he'd never admit it though, he thinks that he has a certain reputation to keep up with the other people at the hospital. Dixie smiled, Jeff was very soft really, he acts like a tough man but in reality he would rather spend an evening at home with the kids and playing with them than out with the lads. Family life suited Jeff down to the ground, he is a brilliant dad and Dixie knew that he would rather die than let anything happen to the people he cared about the most. She had lost count of the times that Jeff talked about Sophia and John when they'd had to go back to London after coming to stay for a while. Dixie just let him talk and reminisce about the time he had spent with them, she would listen to him whenever he needed to talk. The time that Sophia ran away from London was the scariest time of Jeff's life, Dixie had seen the fear and worry in his eyes as they waited for the train to pull in. She'd also seen the anger towards Lucy for driving Sophia to run away in them as well. Jeff was unable to hide anything, it always showed in his eyes, she also saw the love he had for her in them too. Dixie was happy that Sam had got Jeff's eyes, they were such a beautiful colour, she loved his eyes and looking into them made her feel peaceful.

Jeff watched Sophia and John playing with Little Abs in the park, the dog loved them and he would wait for them at the door when they came home from school. Little Abs always knew when they were about to come back, he would go to the door ten minutes before they came in and would refuse to budge. He knew why Dixie had told him to take the kids and the dog to the park, she wanted him to spend time with Sophia and John as well as the baby. Jeff wanted the kids to know how he felt about them, he would always love them and spending time with them was a way to prove to them the depth of his love for them. Sophia threw the stick she held and Little Abs ran after it, he brought it back and then ran around John as he kicked his football about. Jeff was so proud of Sophia and John, they were doing well at school and had made plenty of friends. He remembered worrying that they would be bullied or end up with the wrong crowd, but, none of those things had happened. There were plenty of things to be happy about in his life; Dixie, Sophia, John and Sam. He had a good job and providing for his family made him happy, working hard to give them the best things in life completed him. Jeff looked up when Sophia came over to him. 'Daddy?'

'What is it my little princess?'

'I wanted to be a nurse but I think that I want to be a nurse that helps to bring babies into the world.'

'You want to be a midwife?'

'Do they bring babies into the world?'

'Yes princess.'

'Then I want to be one of those.'

'When did you decide this?'

'When you and mummy Dixie brought baby Sam home, he's so cute and I love him.' Jeff smiled at his daughter and hugged her, it pleased him to think that Sophia had big dreams and wanted to help people.

'I will support you in whatever you choose to do princess.'

'Thank you daddy, I'm going to go and play now.'

'All right princess.' Jeff felt a lot of love for Sophia, she would always be his little princess.

Once the kids had finished playing Jeff put the lead on Little Abs and they slowly walked home together, it had been a good day and he'd enjoyed being with the kids while they played and ran about. Jeff looked up as he passed the florist and it gave him an idea. 'Sophia, John, can you wait here a moment with Little Abs?'

'Of course we can daddy.' Jeff went into the florists and he looked around, he wanted to buy Dixie some nice flowers as a gift, his eyes settled on a very large bunch of flowers in the corner. They were perfect, lots of flowers in blue and purple colours. They were expensive but he wanted to get them for Dixie, he wanted to treat her. The woman behind the desk wrapped the flowers up in cellophane and while she was working her magic on them Jeff picked up a teddy from by the counter that was dressed in a blue sleep suit and had a nightcap on. He added the teddy to the flowers and handed over the cash for them. He thanked the florist and Jeff went outside to where the kids were waiting. 'Are you ready to go home?'

'Yes dad, can I hold Little Abs' lead while we walk?'

'Of course you can son.'

'Daddy, are those for mummy Dixie?'

'Yes, my little princess.'

'I think she will like them, they're very pretty.'

'I am glad that you think so. I hope she will like them.' Jeff held Sophia's hand as they waked back to the house, he was feeling quite happy, he couldn't wait to see Dixie and Sam.

Jeff opened the door to the house, it was quiet so he assumed that Dixie was upstairs in the nursery with Sam. Sophia and John carried on playing with Little Abs in the garden, he could hear them laughing and having fun. He put the flowers and teddy on the side and then went in search of Dixie. Jeff walked up the stairs and into the nursery, Sam was in his cot and Dixie was asleep in the chair by his side. Jeff went over to the cot and picked Sam up. 'Hello Little Bug, it looks like your mummy is tired.' Sam instantly turned to look at Jeff. 'You know your dad, don't you? I love you so very much, you have made your mummy and me so very happy. I'm just going to put you down for a moment while I wake mummy up before she gets a sore neck.' Jeff went over to Dixie and sat in front of her, she was obviously deeply asleep, he gently tapped Dixie's knee and stroked her hand to wake her up. 'Princess, wake up sweetheart.' Dixie stirred and Jeff kept on stroking her hand until her eyes opened. 'Hello princess.'

'Jeff, you're back, when did you get back?'

'Not long ago. Are you tired?'

'Not really, I was just watching Sam sleep and I got to thinking about how happy I am and I must have fallen asleep. How is our Little Bug?'

'He's fine, though he will need to be fed soon.'

'I know, do you want to do it?'

'Are you sure Dixie?'

'We said we would take it in turns to feed him.'

'I know, I am happy that you want me to feed our Little Bug.'

'Of course I do.' Jeff put his arms around Dixie and pulled her close, he tilted her head upwards and kissed her gently. 'I love you princess, always.'

'Love you too Jeff.'

'Come with me, I have a surprise for you.'

'A surprise? What is it?'

'Wait and see.' Jeff picked Sam up and took him downstairs, he made sure that Dixie was following him, he couldn't wait to see her face when she saw the flowers and teddy.

Dixie secured Sam in the little travel cot that they had bought him so they could have him downstairs with them and he could sleep in comfort. 'Princess.' She turned to see Jeff stood behind her, he was holding a bunch of flowers and a teddy.

'Jeffrey Collier, are those for me?

'Who else would they be for?' Dixie went over to Jeff and took the flowers from him.

'They're beautiful, I love them.' She took the vase out from under the sink, put some water in it and then carefully put the flowers into it. 'Thank you Jeff, I love you.'

'Love you too my princess.'

'Who is this little one?' Jeff handed Dixie the bear and she held it in her arms. 'Look at him, he's so cute, just like the man that bought him for me. What are these for?'

'For making me happy.' Dixie went over and snuggled up to Jeff, resting her head against his shoulder.

'You make me happy too.' She felt Jeff's arms wrap around her and hold her close to him, he was warm and she liked snuggling up to him.

'Come on princess, I think it is time we all had something to eat.'

'Good idea, I am hungry.'

'That's the breastfeeding princess, your body is working hard to make milk for our Little Bug.'

'I know, I can put up with a little hunger to make sure that our son gets the best start in life.'

'Go and sit down princess, I'll make us all a feast.' Dixie went into lounge, she held the teddy that Jeff had bought her and smiled, he was such a sweet man. She was looking forward to spending time with Jeff and the kids and putting them to bed with him, then cuddling up together in their own bed. Dixie smiled again as she looked at Sam sleeping in his little cot, her life was now complete.


	44. Chapter Forty-Four

**Author: Raven Shadowrose**

**Rating: M**

**Pairing: ?/?**

**Summary: Sequel to Epiphany, Jeff and Dixie are trying to have a baby, what happens when it is likely to be more difficult than they first thought?**

**Disclaimer: I do not know or own any of the characters from Casualty, any original characters and the story are my property and I do not give permission for either of them to be used.**

**A/N: This is a direct sequel to Epiphany, please read that first to understand this story :) Reviews are welcome :)**

**Thank you to BeethovenRIP, olivia. c. king1 and chan. nelson4444 for your reviews and support during this story. I have some more squish for you :) **

* * *

**Chapter Forty-Four.**

Dixie busied herself readying the towel that had been warming on the radiator for when Sam came out of his bath, Jeff was bathing him, they took it in turns to bath him and Dixie had noticed that Jeff was more confident these days. He had worried that he wouldn't be able to support Sam properly while he was washing him and something bad might happen. She understood his worries, babies could be slippery when they had been in the bath but she trusted Jeff, she had only ever felt safe in his arms. They'd bathed Sam together a few times until Jeff gained some confidence in doing it alone. Dixie still sat in the bathroom with him to support Jeff as he cared for their son, she knew that he felt better with her there. Sam liked being in the bath, the water soothed him and afterwards she would gently massage moisturiser into his skin. Sometimes Dixie got into the large bath with Sam and would just hold him close as they sat in the warm water. Sam liked to be held, having skin contact with her calmed him down and she found that he fed and slept better after lying next to her naked skin. Jeff got in with them sometimes and they would just cuddle up together. 'He's ready to get out now Dix.' Dixie sat by the little bath that they had bought for Sam just before he was born. Jeff carefully picked Sam up out of the water and she quickly wrapped him in the towel so he wouldn't get cold and she dried him carefully making sure that he was completely dry before she rubbed the moisturiser into his skin and checked for nappy rash. Sophia and John helped sometimes, they would sit with Sam in the nursery as he went to sleep and read him stories, they also played with him during the day and looked after him. Dixie was pleased with how much the kids loved their little brother and were helping out with looking after him..

Jeff put Sam's nappy on him and dressed him in his clean clothes ready for their trip out. 'Come on Little Bug, we are going to see the nice people at the hospital where your mummy and daddy work.'

'Jeff, how do you feel about bathing our little boy now?'

'I'm okay, sort of, I would hate for anything to happen to him because of me.'

'Nothing is going to happen to him, you are a brilliant daddy Jeff. Look, you're holding Sam and he is totally peaceful, he trusts you to look after him and take care of his needs. I trust you too.'

'He's so small and I just worry that I'll make a mistake or let him down in some way.'

'Jeff, why do you feel like that?'

'I don't know, he needs me and relies on me, you need me and so do Sophia and John. I just don't want to let any of you down.'

'You won't, you're the sweetest man I know. The fact that you're worrying proves it. I know that you want to do a good job and give all of your children the best of everything, if anyone can do it then it is you.'

'Thanks Dixie.' Jeff knew that Dixie was telling him the truth, he heard it in her words as she spoke to him, her faith in him was keeping him going. 'You're welcome love.' Jeff smiled, he was feeling a bit better about bathing Sam and looking after him. 'I'll go and make sure that the kids are ready to go, will you bring Sam down and put him in the car?'

'Yeah, of course I will.' Dixie left the room and Jeff looked at his son who was starting to fall asleep in his arms, he silently promised him again that he would always be there for him and never let him down, it was one promise that he intended to keep to all of his family.

Dixie went into the garden, Sophia was on the swing that Jeff had bought and John was playing with his football with Little Abs, now that the days were longer and a bit warmer they could play out more, it pleased her to see them making the most of the last few days that they had off school. 'Sophia, John, can you be ready to go in five minutes please?'

'Are we going to see Auntie Tamzin,' Sophia said and jumped off the swing.

'We are, we're going to take your brother to see our friends at the hospital too.'

'Good, I like Auntie Tamzin, she's nice.' Dixie smiled and went inside to get her own coat and shoes, she was looking forward to seeing the people that she had been missing while she was on maternity leave. She loved her job and sometimes she wanted to be back there but she loved Sam too and therefore being off work was definitely worth it.

Jeff carefully strapped Sam into his seat and then he double checked that everything was where it was supposed to be and holding Sam in properly. He had been taking more care when driving these days as he didn't want anything to happen to anyone that he cared for. Becoming a father again had changed Jeff's priorities, he only wanted the best for his family. He would always do his best for them to make sure that they have good life. Jeff wanted to give his children the best of everything, he would make sure that they always had clothes and food. He gazed down at Sam, he was asleep, his little chest moving gently up and down. 'Sleep well my Little Bug.' Jeff stood by the car and waited for Dixie, he wasn't going to leave Sam alone, she came out of the house a few minutes later with Sophia and John following behind her. He got into the car, made sure they were all securely strapped in and only then did he start the engine and drive off.

Dixie got out of the car at the hospital, she took Sam out of his seat and cradled him in her arms, he had slept for a little while but now he was awake and he yawned. 'Come on Jeff, we should go and see everyone in the station first.'

'Good idea, come on kids.' Dixie walked by Jeff's side as they went into the station, some of the crew were around and Norman came over to them as they walked towards the back of the station.

'Hello Jeff, Dixie.'

'Hey Norman,' Dixie said and smiled.

'Is that the little one?'

'It is.'

'He's beautiful.'

'Thanks Norman.'

'How are you doing Dixie?'

'I'm all right, I'm a bit tired from getting up to feed Sam during the night but Jeff is helping all that he can with them, we take it in turns to get up.'

'That's good to hear.' Norman was distracted by his radio going off. 'I have to go but congratulations on your new baby.' Dixie and Jeff thanked Norman again and watched him leave and then they went to see Tamzin in the office.

Jeff tapped on the office door and Tamzin looked up. 'Hello everyone, I am glad to see you all.' Tamzin hugged Sophia and then John. 'You brought the little one with you, how is he?'

'He's doing very well, he's feeding frequently and I think he's growing by the minute.'

'That is good to hear, you look well Dixie. Is Jeff looking after you?'

'Of course he is.'

'Good.'

'I am looking after everyone,' Jeff said and smiled at Tamzin.

'I can see that, you look like a very proud daddy. It is so nice to see you all. Are you enjoying your paternity leave?'

'Very much, it is nice to spend time with all of my family.'

'You like looking after them, I can see it.'

'I do.'

'Family life definitely agrees with you.'

'I love it, it is definitely one of the pleasures in life.'

'I think it will be hard for you to come back to work.'

'Maybe a little bit.'

'Just enjoy the time you have while you're off. You're a good dad Jeff, I know it.'

'Thanks Tamzin.'

'You're welcome. Are you going in to see everyone else? They've been asking me when you're going to come in and see them.'

'We are.'

'That's good.' Jeff and Dixie stayed in the station a little bit longer and then went into the hospital, it was time to introduce Sam to the rest of their colleagues.

Dixie went to the reception desk and Tess came over as she approached. 'Dixie, Jeff, come into the staffroom, it is so nice to see you both.'

'Nice to see you too Tess.' Dixie and Jeff followed Tess into the staffroom.

'So this is the little one and who are these two?'

'This is Sophia and John, two of my lovely children, ' Jeff said. 'This is Tess, she might deny it but she is the boss of this place.' Jeff smiled as Tess shook hands with Sophia and John.

'They're lovely Jeff, you should be very proud of them.'

'I am.' Dixie handed Sam to Tess when she went over to her.

'Look at him, he's so beautiful. What did you call him?'

'Sam.'

'Hello Sam, I have a son called Sam. He's lovely, it reminds me of when my Sam was this small.' Dixie looked up when half of the staff from the department came in to look at Sam, she was pleased that they had all come to see her, Jeff and their baby.

Jeff sat with Sophia and John as they had a stream of visitors coming in and out of the staffroom to see baby Sam. He was definitely the star of the show and he was pleased that everyone loved him. 'Daddy, I think everyone likes our baby brother.'

'They like you too, who do you like the best?'

'I like Big Mac, he is so nice, he brought us some juice and a biscuit.'

'What about you John?'

'I like Noel, he showed me his action figures.'

'Oh yes, Noel and his action figures are legendary in this department.'

'Can I go and see some more of them? Noel said I could go behind the reception and play with them.'

'Of course you can, you must stay at the reception though.'

'I will do, thank you dad.'

'You're welcome.' John got up and left the room, Jeff was happy that his son had found his confidence with Dixie's help, he wouldn't have talked to Noel before he met her.

Jeff didn't mind that Dixie was the centre of attention with Sam, he was quite happy sat with Sophia and letting her cuddle up to him. 'Daddy, when I was born, what did you think of me?'

'You were so cute, so small and cuddly. When you were born you were a little bit early and the nurses had to help you. You had to stay in hospital for a few days until you were strong enough to go home. You're my little fighter Sophia. I stayed with you for as long as I was allowed each day. I loved you from the first second that I saw you. I used to like holding you and singing to you.'

'Like you do with baby Sam?'

'Exactly like that.'

'Was it the same with John?'

'It was, he was a quiet baby, he never really cried and when he did that was quiet too. I fell in love with you all when I held you close to me.'

'Daddy, do you think that I will have a baby?'

'Of course you will my little princess, you will be a very good mummy.'

'I want to be like mummy Dixie.' Jeff smiled and kissed Sophia on the head, he had every faith in her that she would be a wonderful mother one day.

Dixie gently rocked Sam in her arms as they left the staffroom, everyone had loved him and she had been so happy to see all of the people that she worked with and was very happy that they had loved Sam as much as she and Jeff did. She would like to stay a bit longer but Sam was getting tired and cranky and she didn't want him getting too overstimulated. They stopped off at reception and found John sat in Noel's seat and they were playing with the action figures that were lined up on Noel's desk. Dixie saw Jeff smile, she knew how happy he was that John was talking to people and had come out of his shell. 'Come on John, it is time to go home.'

'Do I have to?'

'You can come back again, little brother, I'll be happy to see you,' Noel said.

'Okay, I'd like that.' Dixie smiled, Noel had clearly taken a liking to John and the reverse was also true. John got up and Dixie looked around to see Sophia giving Big Mac a hug, he was lovely man that cared for people and Sophia clearly liked him. Dixie turned to Jeff. 'Come on Jeff, take us home. I think our little boy is getting a bit cranky.'

'He's just tired, he'll be all right once he gets a bit of sleep.'

'You're right.'

'I think mummy needs some sleep too, mummy looks a little bit tired.'

'Maybe, it has been a long day.'

'You are going to bed for a nap once we get home.'

'Bossy Jeffrey.'

'It is for your own good princess.' Dixie smiled, Jeff was looking after her and she liked it, he was a caring man and he made her happy. She looked around at the little family that surrounded her, sometimes it was the simple things that made you the happiest.


	45. Chapter Forty-Five

**Author: Raven Shadowrose**

**Rating: M**

**Pairing: ?/?**

**Summary: Sequel to Epiphany, Jeff and Dixie are trying to have a baby, what happens when it is likely to be more difficult than they first thought?**

**Disclaimer: I do not know or own any of the characters from Casualty, any original characters and the story are my property and I do not give permission for either of them to be used.**

**A/N: This is a direct sequel to Epiphany, please read that first to understand this story :) Reviews are welcome :)**

**Thank you to BeethovenRIP and chan. nelson4444 for your reviews and support, I really hope you enjoy this chapter. **

* * *

**Chapter Forty-Five.**

Dixie looked around the lounge and checked that everything was tidy and that there wasn't anything that looked too dirty or out of place, the health visitor was coming and Dixie didn't want her to find anything that she thought was a danger to Sam. It was important to Dixie that people thought she was a good mother. Sophia and John had gone back to school, Dixie was missing them, she had spent time with them while they were on holiday and now that they had gone back it was very quiet and the house seemed empty. Jeff came in with Sam and put him in his basket, Little Abs followed him and once Sam was lying down Little Abs lay down next to him. Little Abs had been looking after Sam for a few days. Once Little Abs was there and sat by the basket then nobody could move him. 'Dix, I think our little one has a protector.' Dixie turned around and she smiled when she saw Little Abs sat with their baby.

'I think so too, he won't budge, I think if anyone tried to harm our little one then Little Abs would have them.'

'Nobody is going to harm our Little Bug, I won't let them.'

'Neither will I.' Dixie went to the bookshelf and straightened the books and ornaments that were on there. 'Jeff, do you think everything looks clean enough?'

'How do you mean, it looks good enough to me.'

'Will it be good enough for the health visitor though? I don't want her to think that we are slobs and aren't looking after Sam properly.'

'She won't think that we're not looking after Sam properly. He's feeding well and gaining weight, he's just been bathed and I know in my heart that we're looking after him properly.'

'I know, I just don't want people to think that we're not doing a good job.'

'They're not going to think that princess.'

'Are you sure?'

'Very, come here Dixie.' Jeff put his arms around Dixie and hugged her. 'You are a very good mummy and nobody is going to say that you're not. You were made for this princess.'

'You're a brilliant daddy too Jeff.' Dixie snuggled into Jeff's arms and took comfort from the warmth that came off his body.

Jeff held Dixie close to him and tried his best to comfort her, he wanted Dixie to feel better about the visit from the health visitor, she was just coming to make sure that Sam was doing well, feeding properly and gaining weight. She was also coming to check on Dixie and her health after giving birth, Jeff was keeping an eye on her and making sure that she rested and put her feet up from time to time. Dixie seemed to be doing well, he knew that she was tired from waking up to feed Sam but he was making sure that she took naps throughout the day and he would take care of Sam while she got some rest. Jeff didn't want Dixie getting ill, he would make sure that she was well looked after. 'Don't worry Dixie, everything will be fine princess.'

'I hope you're right.' Jeff felt Dixie start when the doorbell rang and he steadied her with his hands.

'I am right, just sit down and relax, I'll get the door.'

'Okay.' Dixie picked Sam up and held him in her arms, she sat down on the sofa, she was nervous, she had gone through so much to be a mother and she didn't want someone coming to tell her that she wasn't looking after her son properly.

Jeff came back in with the health visitor and the woman put her bag down by the chair, she sat down and took her equipment out she placed it on the table in front of her and then folded her hands in her lap. 'Hello, I'm Patricia, you must be Kathleen and Jeff and that must be Sam.'

'Yeah, he is.'

'On this visit I will check Sam over and make sure that he is developing properly. Can I take a look at him?' Patricia stood up and held her arms out.

'Of course you can.' Dixie gave Sam to Patricia and she looked on anxiously as he was weighed.

'Seven pounds ten.'

'That seems a bit low to me, shouldn't he be heavier?'

'No, newborn babies lose some of their birth weight in the first week due to losing the excess water that they were born with. Don't worry, he has gained his birth weight back again and two ounces on top, that is a very good start.'

'Oh, good,' Dixie breathed a sigh of relief. Patricia measured Sam and noted down his body length and the size of his head. Dixie watched Patricia as she tested Sam's reactions, checked his eyes, ears and mouth and gave him a thorough check up.

'How often is he feeding?'

Usually about twelve times a day.'

'That's a good amount. How many times do you change his nappy a day?'

'Ten.'

'Very good.' Patricia made a few notes in the book she was writing in and then she closed it. 'Sam is totally healthy, I've written down his results in this book. Take it with you when you come to the clinic to have him weighed. We have a clinic once a week on Wednesday afternoon where the babies are weighed and you can ask any questions that you might have about Sam or his development. You'll need to come in every week until he is eight weeks old and then we'll look at changing it to every fortnight.'

'All right, thank you.'

'This is probably jumping ahead a bit but when he is two months old we will schedule the first of Sam's injections.'

'Okay.'

'Don't worry so much about that now though. I'll leave you a card with my number on it and if you have any pressing questions then you can call me and I will answer them for you.' Dixie felt relieved that Sam had passed all of his checks and she wasn't failing him in any way.

Jeff put his arm around Dixie, he hoped that she was feeling a bit better now, she was a perfectionist at heart and she wanted Sam to have the best. 'Now we move onto you, how are you feeling?'

'I'm okay, I feel tired occasionally but I think that is to be expected.'

'Are you breastfeeding?'

'I am, most of the time. Sometimes I express milk and Jeff feeds him.'

'Good, having dad help out with the feeds encourages a bond between them, not to mention it means you get to sleep a bit more. I don't think you are having any problems with the feeding as baby Sam is definitely gaining weight. How are you feeling emotionally? I do have to ask this as some women struggle with post-natal depression.'

'Sometimes I feel a bit under pressure, I just want Sam to have the best start in life. Jeff helps me as much as he can.'

'That is normal, every mother wants to take care of their newborn. You are doing fantastically well, I can see that Sam is healthy and happy. I hope that puts your mind at rest.'

'It does, thank you.'

'Take some time to relax and don't forget each other, if you have someone that can look after Sam for a few hours when you feel ready then you can focus on each other. Massage is the perfect way for you to get close to each other.'

'Is there any length of time we should wait to make love again?' Jeff asked.

'The only time that matters is when you feel ready, looking after a baby is exhausting, take all the time you need and discuss it between yourselves. Don't worry about making love right away, spend quality time with each other, whether that is cuddling and talking or going out for a meal. When you feel ready just take it slowly and go at your own pace.'

All right, thank you.' Jeff felt happier now that the health visitor had told them that Sam was healthy and had given them some advice.

Dixie didn't feel so bad, Patricia was a nice woman and hadn't said that she was a bad mother and seemed happy with Sam's progress. 'I have organised a six week check for you with the local doctor. It is just to make sure that everything is going well with your recovery. Sam will be checked over again and you will have another opportunity to ask any questions that you have.'

'Can we both attend the appointment?'

'Yes, fathers are quite welcome. Do you have any more questions?'

'No, not for now.'

'All right, make sure that you eat healthily and I'll leave you some information leaflets on breastfeeding and taking care of yourself and Sam. If you think of anything you want to ask me about then you can call me at any time.'

'Thank you.' Patricia stood up and picked up her bag.

'I will see you at the clinic next Wednesday. Goodbye everyone.'

'I'll show you out.' Jeff stood up and went with Patricia to the door. Dixie picked Sam up again and held him close to her, she was relieved that Patricia thought everything was going well and Sam was developing normally.

'Well done Little Bug, we've passed our test.' Dixie gently kissed Sam on the head and held him close to her.

Jeff came back in and sat next to Dixie. 'Are you feeling better now princess?'

'Lots, I am relieved that she thinks we're doing a good job.'

'Of course we are princess.'

'Jeff?'

'What is it Dix?'

'Do you want to make love again?'

'Only when you're ready sweetheart. You've only been back from the hospital for ten days and I want you to be sure that you're ready before we do anything. I am happy holding you as we sleep. I would rather that you got the rest that you need whilst you're feeding our son.'

'You feed him too.'

'I know. I'm happy to wait until the time is right, I don't want to rush you.'

'Thanks Jeff.'

'I just want the best for you and our son, I will always put you both first no matter what.' Dixie smiled and Jeff kissed her on the head. 'You're a sweet man Jeffrey Collier.'

'I am glad that you think so princess.'

'I do.' Dixie rested her head on Jeff's shoulder. 'Do you want to hold Sam for a little while?' Jeff supported Sam's head and held him close. 'Hello Little Bug, I am so proud of your mummy and you. I love you both so very much and I will always protect you.' Jeff looked down at Sam, he had grown and was feeling heavier. He couldn't wait until Sam started smiling and laughing. 'Dix, our little boy is growing so quickly, I can't wait to see him take his first steps and starts talking.'

'Me either.' Jeff stroked Sam's head and smiled down at his son.

Dixie looked at the clock, it was nearly time for them to go and get Sophia and John from school. 'Jeff, why don't you go and get Sophia and John and while you're gone I will make us something nice and we can have a family dinner together.'

'That sounds good to me princess.'

'Pick up something nice from the shop for dessert, I feel like celebrating.' Jeff smiled, it pleased him to see Dixie looking happy and more relaxed now that the health visitor had been and was pleased with the progress that Sam was making.

'All right Dix.' Jeff went over to Dixie after she had put Sam in his basket and he pulled her into his arms. He kissed her gently and then a bit deeper when Dixie opened her mouth beneath his. Jeff pulled back after a few moments and kissed Dixie on the head. 'I love you Mrs Collier.'

'Love you too Mr Collier.' Jeff kissed Dixie on the head and picked up the keys to the car.

'I'll see you soon.'

'See you soon love.' Dixie watched Jeff leave and then she turned her mind to dinner, she was going to make something wonderful for when Jeff and the kids came back to celebrate that the visit from the health visitor had gone so well.


	46. Chapter Forty-Six

**Author: Raven Shadowrose**

**Rating: M**

**Pairing: ?/?**

**Summary: Sequel to Epiphany, Jeff and Dixie are trying to have a baby, what happens when it is likely to be more difficult than they first thought?**

**Disclaimer: I do not know or own any of the characters from Casualty, any original characters and the story are my property and I do not give permission for either of them to be used.**

**A/N: This is a direct sequel to Epiphany, please read that first to understand this story :) Reviews are welcome :)**

**Thank you to BeethovenRIP, olivia. c. king1 and chan. nelson4444 for your reviews and support, enjoy :) **

* * *

**Chapter Forty-Six.**

Jeff sat by Dixie's side as she breastfed Sam, he still felt honoured that Dixie allowed him to sit with her as she breastfed their son. He loved watching her and Sam together, there was something so natural and beautiful about a mother feeding her child. Dixie's milk was the best thing for Sam, it had everything that he needed for the best start in life. Jeff stroked Dixie's hair as she fed their son, he always felt close to them both at this time. Dixie was born to be a mother and it made him happy to know that he has given her the chance to have everything that she wanted. He loved playing the role of daddy to all of his children. John and Sophia were in bed for school and he was hoping to connect with Dixie a little bit now that she had been home from hospital for over a fortnight. He wanted to spend time with Dixie and make sure that they made time for each other. Sam is developing quickly and gaining weight as he should be. It pleased Jeff to know that all of his family is safe and sound. Dixie had come through the birth safely and Sam was born healthy, it made him happy to know that he was doing his job of looking after them properly.

Jeff watched as Dixie burped Sam and then gently lay him down on his back in his cot, she gently held his hand and stroked his cheek as he fell asleep, it made Jeff smile, Dixie was a loving mother to their son and his kids. 'Goodnight Little Bug, see you in the morning.' Dixie kissed Sam's head and gazed down at their son. 'He's getting bigger Jeff, I look at him every day and I notice how much bigger he has got.' Jeff stroked Sam's head and noted that his hair was growing more now.

'That's all thanks to his mummy feeding him and giving him everything that he needs.'

'And his daddy too, he needs us both.' Jeff checked the baby monitor and made sure that the volume was turned up, he picked up the other monitor and held it in his hand.

'Come on princess, our Little Bug is well fed and sleeping, now it is time for his beautiful mummy to get some rest.'

'Have you got the monitor?'

'Yes, don't worry princess.'

'Okay, that's good.' Jeff put his arm around Dixie and guided her out of the nursery and into their bedroom, now that Sam was asleep it was the perfect time for him to get close to Dixie again. He wanted to make sure that she was all right and coping with looking after Sam, looking after a new baby was hard on all new mothers and Jeff wanted to look after Dixie.

Dixie climbed into bed, she sensed that Jeff wanted to talk to her about something and she wondered what it was. Jeff got into bed too and she snuggled up to him. 'Dixie, you are all right, aren't you?'

'How do you mean?'

'Looking after a baby is hard work and I wonder if I'm helping you enough.'

'Of course you are Jeff.'

'What are you going to do when I go back to work?'

'Don't worry love, I will be fine. Nadia will be here to help me. What about you?'

'I'm going to miss you, the kids and Little Bug. I feel like I'm going to miss so much of his development while I'm working.'

'I will take lots of pictures and call you when anything happens.'

'I wish that paternity leave was longer than a month.'

'Me too.'

'I'm just worried that looking after Sam might be harder for you when I'm back working twelve hour shifts.'

'You said it yourself, you're only going to work days so you can spend nights here.'

'Even so, I'm worrying that I'm abandoning you and the kids.'

'Jeff, you're not abandoning us, you're going to work.'

'Are you sure?'

'Very, I love you Jeff and you're not abandoning me or the kids.'

'Okay, you're right.' Dixie put her arms around Jeff and hugged him tight, she didn't want him to feel like he was abandoning them. He would always do his best to provide for them.

Jeff took comfort from having Dixie cuddled up to him, it was nice to be so close to her. Dixie's belly had got smaller and it was easier for them to cuddle up now. He wanted to talk to her about things and see how she felt about them getting closer again. 'Dix?'

'Yeah, what is it love?'

'I wanted to see how you felt about us and I want you to know that there isn't any pressure on you to feel ready for us to start having a physical relationship again.'

'You're sweet Jeff, I think that I will be okay in another couple of weeks.'

'It's all right if you're not, I want you to take all of the time that you need princess.'

'Thanks Jeff.'

'I don't want to hurt you or make you uncomfortable during our lovemaking. I know it will take some time for you to get back to normal.'

'It will do, I am looking forward to being with you again though Jeff.'

'Don't rush it, I want you fully recovered.' Jeff kissed Dixie on the head and he held her close. 'I do want to stay close to you in other ways though, I'd hate for us to lose the closeness that we've always had.'

'Other ways, what do you mean by that?'

'I've been reading up on ways that new parents can keep their relationship close and work on their togetherness.'

'What did you come up with?'

'They suggested massage and cuddling up to each other like we're doing now.'

'Okay, how about we start now.'

'Are you sure princess? You're not too tired?'

'No, I'm not, can I start?'

'All right Dix, I will put myself in your hands.' Jeff lifted his arms as Dixie lifted his shirt over his head, he wondered what she would do, he was looking forward to her massaging him.

Dixie placed her hands on Jeff's shoulders and she moved them down his arms, she stroked her hands down his arms a few times and then moved them back up to his shoulders. She ran her fingers over the tattoo on Jeff's arm, she liked it, she didn't normally like tattoos, but on him it was perfect. Dixie felt some tension in Jeff's left shoulder and she moved her hands over it. 'Jeffrey, have you been carrying heavy things on your left arm again?'

'Maybe, why?'

'Because your left shoulder is all tight, you really need to balance the weight between both arms.'

'Okay princess, you're the boss.'

'Don't you forget it.' Jeff smiled, he liked Dixie's bossy side. Dixie gently massaged Jeff's left shoulder until she felt the tension in it release and then she moved her hands down the middle of his back.

'You're good at this princess.'

'Do you think so?'

'Yeah, I do.' Dixie barely heard Jeff speak his voice had gone that quiet, she loved touching his bare skin and caressing it with her hands. She knew that Jeff was relaxing and enjoying her touch as his breathing had relaxed and slowed down and his eyes had closed. Dixie moved her hands around Jeff's waist and she rested her head on his back, she pressed gentle kisses against his shoulder and held him close to her.

Jeff sighed in pleasure, Dixie massaging him had relaxed him a lot and he was feeling the benefit from it. He wanted to keep their relationship as close as it was before Sam was born, if they didn't make time for each other then they risked starting to argue and he didn't want that. 'I think it is your turn now princess,' Jeff said quietly and he turned to face Dixie.

'I think I'll have to leave my bra on, it can be uncomfortable without it.' Jeff moved until he was sat behind Dixie and in perfect position to massage her body.

'No problem princess, does it really hurt?'

'No, I am just producing milk properly now and I find that just before feeding Sam or expressing milk it can be a bit uncomfortable and I feel a bit full.'

'Are you feeling like that now?'

'No, I've just fed him, I might do in a few hours though.'

'Is there anything I can do to help you?'

'Feeding Sam helps me feel better so don't worry.'

'Okay, I know that you can get infections and so on, if there is anything I want you to tell me and we'll get you checked out.'

'I will, I promise.'

'Good.' Jeff helped Dixie take her top off, he wrapped his arms around her and held her against his bare chest. 'I love you my princess.'

'Love you too Jeff.' He rested his hands on Dixie's shrinking belly and caressed it.

'You're so beautiful my love.'

'I don't think that my belly will ever be the same, I know the stretch marks that are there now probably won't go away.'

'You got those bringing our beautiful little boy into the world. A few stretch marks don't make you any less beautiful, you're always beautiful to me my love.'

'You're sweet my Jeffrey.' Jeff smiled into Dixie's shoulder and he pressed a kiss against her skin.

Dixie closed her eyes as Jeff's hands began gently rubbing her belly and then moved his hands up her sides and to her shoulders. She felt the straps of her bra being moved slightly down her arms and she sighed quietly as Jeff's hands worked their way over the muscles in her shoulders and back. Dixie relaxed and she let her hands sit in her lap, Jeff's hands gently touching her skin was making her feel wonderful. Dixie was happy that Jeff had suggested they massage each other, she felt closer to him than ever. Dixie remembered Jeff massaging her the night before the operation to open her tubes so that she could get pregnant to calm her down and help her sleep, she was experiencing the same feelings now as she had then. Jeff's strong arms moved around her and held her close to him. She snuggled into him and rested her head against his shoulder. 'Thank you Jeff.'

'For what?'

'For this evening, I feel all nice and relaxed now.'

'I do too.'

'Thank you for making me feel beautiful too.'

'I mean it, you are my beautiful wife.' Dixie felt Jeff move the straps of her bra back up and into position. He rested his head on her shoulder and held her close. Dixie felt his breath on her neck, it felt comforting and reassuring. Having Jeff's arms around made her feel safe and loved, she knew that he would always protect her.

Jeff lay back on the pillows on his side of the bed, he felt more relaxed than he had done in a long time. 'Dix, come and lie down with me.' He lifted his arm and Dixie rested her head on his chest, her hand moved and rested across his stomach. 'I like that we can lie like this, it is nice to feel our bare skin touching.'

'I know, you're always so warm Jeff, I like it.'

'Do you?'

'Very much, I love it.'

'Good, I'll be your hot water bottle whenever you need me to be princess.' Jeff stroked Dixie's hair and moved it away from her face, he kissed her head and wrapped his arms around her. 'Get some sleep my princess. I will take the next feed so don't worry.'

'Is there enough milk in the fridge?'

'Yes, I checked before we came upstairs.'

'Don't forget to heat it up,' Dixie said and yawned.

'I won't forget. I want you to get some sleep Dix, you're tired.'

'I think that I am.'

'Rest princess, I will take care of our Little Bug when he needs feeding.'

'Okay Jeffrey, goodnight.' Jeff smiled, he heard the sleepiness in Dixie's voice and her eyes started to flutter shut.

'Goodnight sweetheart.' Jeff kissed Dixie's head again and he watched Dixie as she slept for a few minutes. Jeff checked the baby monitor had enough power to last the night and that the sound was turned up, he placed it on the table and faced it towards him so that he would hear it right away when Sam woke up. Jeff checked that Dixie was sleeping, she needed to rest and he was going to make sure that she had the chance to do so. Once he was certain that she was sleeping Jeff closed his eyes and went to sleep himself.


	47. Chapter Forty-Seven

**Author: Raven Shadowrose**

**Rating: M**

**Pairing: ?/?**

**Summary: Sequel to Epiphany, Jeff and Dixie are trying to have a baby, what happens when it is likely to be more difficult than they first thought?**

**Disclaimer: I do not know or own any of the characters from Casualty, any original characters and the story are my property and I do not give permission for either of them to be used.**

**A/N: This is a direct sequel to Epiphany, please read that first to understand this story :) Reviews are welcome :)**

**Thank you to BeethovenRIP, olivia. c. king1 and chan. nelson4444 for your reviews and support, I think this is a very squishy chapter. **

* * *

**Chapter Forty-Seven.**

The weeks passed quickly and Sam continued to develop and gain weight, it was time for Dixie's six week check and Jeff had taken the day off so that he could go with her, he wanted to be there for her as often as he could be. He'd had to return to work and he had been finding it hard being without Sam and Dixie during the day. Jeff called home as often as he could and always rushed home to them after the shift, he wanted to know everything that had happened and if Sam had done anything. He loved his family and being with them made him happy and complete. Jeff always made time to sit with Sophia and John as they were doing their homework or watching something on television after finishing their work. Sometimes they would talk about their mum, they had talked to her on the phone a couple of times, Jeff respected that they wanted to talk to her and he wouldn't stop them. Jeff kept his opinions to himself, there were times he still hated Lucy for what she did to the kids but he knew that it wasn't all her fault, she had been ill at the time. Jeff shook his head, he was trying hard not to dwell on the bad things. There were plenty of good things in his life and he wanted to focus on them instead.

Dixie sat in the waiting room of the surgery, she was a bit nervous, she hoped that the doctor would tell her that everything was all right with her and Sam. Dixie heard her name being called and she stood up, Jeff picked up Sam's basket and they went into the room that they had been told to. 'Hello Mr and Mrs Collier, please take a seat.' Dixie sat down and Jeff sat next to her with Sam. 'I understand that this is your six week post-natal check. How are you feeling?'

'I'm all right.'

'Any signs of depression or feeling low?'

'No.'

'Good. Are you breastfeeding?'

'Yes, I am.'

'How is that going?'

'Very well, better than I thought it would.'

'Excellent. During this visit I will check your blood pressure do a urine test and examine you to make sure that everything has healed properly.'

'Okay.'

'Have you had a period yet?'

'No, should I have?'

'I do not think that you will restart your periods until you start breastfeeding less, you should see some signs of them returning when you're breastfeeding about three times a day.'

'All right.'

'Let's start with your blood pressure.' Dixie rolled her sleeve up so the doctor could put the blood pressure cuff on her arm.

Jeff was relieved to hear that Dixie's blood pressure and weight were both normal and her urine test showed that her kidneys were functioning normally. Dixie was being examined by the doctor and he was relieved to hear the doctor tell Dixie that her uterus had returned to its normal position and her muscles used during the delivery all felt normal and as they should be. The doctor pulled the curtain back when she had finished examining Dixie, she washed her hands and she started typing things into the computer. 'I am satisfied that you are healthy after giving birth. In another six weeks I want you to come back in so we can do a cervical screening test, it is just routine after you have given birth.'

'All right, I will do.'

'We will send you an appointment through the post. Have you had sexual intercourse since you gave birth?'

'No, not yet, we've been busy with Sam.'

'That's understandable, when you start intimate relations again you will need to use some form of contraception, as you are breastfeeding you will not be able to go back on the pill for the time being. I will give you some information on the forms of contraception you can use. Fertility can return quickly after childbirth and you should take care.'

'Thank you.'

'How are you sleeping?'

'We take it in turns with the feeding so it isn't too bad. I do feel tired occasionally but we have a child minder to help me out if I need a sleep during the day.'

'Good. How does Sam sleep?'

'He wakes up for his feeds and we've had some nights where he struggles to sleep but those seem to be getting fewer now.'

'That is normal, now that he is six weeks old you should be able to develop his sleeping patterns. If you have any problems then ask your health visitor for some advice and tips to help Sam to sleep.'

'We will do.' Jeff squeezed Dixie's hand and she smiled at him.

Dixie was happy that the doctor thought that she was fit and healthy after giving birth. 'While you are here I will create a medical record for Sam with the information from your health visitor. He is developing well judging by the information here. I'll just take a quick look at him.' Dixie put Sam on the bed and stood by as the doctor checked him over. 'Has he smiled yet?'

'Not yet.'

'There is time, some babies don't smile until they are eight weeks.' The doctor listened to Sam's heart and breathing, she checked his pulse and made sure that his spine was developing properly. 'Everything is developing as it should, Sam is focusing on objects and making all of the noises I would expect for a baby of his age.' Dixie fastened Sam's baby grow and then put him back in his basket as the doctor made more notes on Sam's file. 'Keep up the visits with the health visitor at the clinic and they will notify us when he has had his first set of injections. If you need to discuss anything or feel the need to visit then book an appointment at any time.'

'We will, thank you doctor.'

'You're welcome, I will see you in six weeks for your cervical screening test.' Dixie and Jeff said goodbye to the doctor and went back to the car, she was pleased that Sam was growing healthily and she was well too.

Jeff was happy with the progress that Sam and Dixie were making he just wanted them both to be healthy and well. He carefully parked the car in the driveway and took Sam inside in his basket. Once Jeff got Sam inside the house he carefully took him out of his basket and held him close. 'Hey Little Bug, I'm so proud of you, you're getting to be a very big boy.' Jeff lay back on the sofa and rested Sam on his chest, he liked to just hold him against his chest like this. He gently held Sam so he wouldn't fall off and closed his eyes, it had been a bit of a long night as Sam kept waking up, surely it wouldn't matter if he just rested his eyes for a little while? Jeff gently stroked Sam's head and then kissed it. 'I love you my Little Bug,' he said and protectively put his arm over Sam's back to keep him from falling off. Jeff was happy that he had got to spend the day with Sam and Dixie, Sophia and John would be home later and then he could spend time with them too.

Dixie went into the lounge and she saw Jeff lying on the sofa with Sam resting on his chest, she went closer and saw Jeff's breathing deeply, he'd obviously fallen asleep. He had got up to feed Sam and sit with him when he woke the night before and it had obviously exhausted him. Dixie smiled and sat down on the floor, she gently lifted Sam out from under Jeff's arm. 'Come on peanut, let's let your daddy sleep, I think he is a bit tired.' Dixie gently put a cushion under Jeff's head and covered him up with a blanket and she kissed him on the head. 'Sleep well love.' Dixie smiled down at her husband and she turned her attention to Sam. 'Come on my little one, someone needs changing.' Dixie rested Sam down on the changing mat and she carefully removed his nappy, put it into the bag she had waiting. She cleaned him up and put the cream on to protect him from nappy rash. Dixie secured Sam's new nappy and gently tickled him under the chin. She thought about how happy she was to be a mum, she loved looking after Sam and just holding him close to her. 'I love you my little one.' Sam yawned and Dixie smiled. 'I think it is time for your nap peanut.' She put Sam on his back in his little basket and held his hand as he fell asleep.

Dixie felt peaceful, the house was quiet with both Sam and Jeff asleep, she just sat watching them and thinking. Jeff had given her the chance to be a mum and she loved him for it, he was the only man that she had ever fallen for and that made him quite special. It was his eyes that she had noticed first, she liked looking into them and they made her feel peaceful. His hugs had always been comforting and she loved them a lot. Having his arms around her made her feel loved and cared for, she loved him too, if there was one thing that she knew then it was that. He had always gone out of his way to make her happy and do whatever he could for her. Dixie knew that Jeff had always loved her, she always suspected that he had revealed his true feelings when he had said he loved her during the time they were trapped by those dogs. She often wondered how he dealt with his feelings for her after that day, had he held any hope that they would be together one day? Had he ever allowed himself to dream that she might love him back. Dixie looked at Jeff as he was sleeping, he wasn't everyone's idea of a perfect man, he was human and he made mistakes. She had seen a lot of the mistakes that he had made at work and in his personal life but it didn't make her love him any less. Dixie looked at her watch, she had lost track of time while she was thinking and it was getting later in the day, the kids would be home from school soon and Little Abs was going to need walking. She didn't want to wake Jeff up but she was going to have to. Sam was still asleep and he would be until he needed his next feed.

Jeff felt someone gently shaking him out his sleep. 'Jeff love, come on, it is time to wake up.' He was still feeling as if he was asleep but he remembered that he had been holding Sam as he went to sleep. Jeff opened his eyes and saw that Sam was no longer there, he sat up quickly.

'Dix, where's Sam?'

'Hush love, he's sleeping in his basket. I came in to find you asleep.' Jeff breathed a sigh of relief, Sam was all right.

'I was worried that something had happened to him.'

'No love, he was quite happy lying on your chest, even in sleep I know you wouldn't let anything happen to him.'

'No, I wouldn't.'

'You looked so cute with our Little Bug lying on you.'

'Do you mean I'm not cute normally?'

'Of course you are.' Jeff smiled and made room for Dixie on the sofa, she snuggled up to him and he put his arm around her.

Dixie rested her head against Jeff's shoulder and she took comfort from having him so close to her. 'Jeff.'

'Yeah.'

'I love you.'

'Love you too princess.'

'I think we should try to make love again, I miss being in your arms.'

'Are you sure that you're ready?'

'I don't know but I think that we should try, we won't know unless we do.'

'Yeah, you're right. If it hurts you I will stop though.'

'Deal.' Dixie felt her chin being gently lifted and she found herself looking into Jeff's eyes, he leaned in and she closed her eyes as his lips touched hers. She felt his fingers running up and down her arm as their kiss became deeper and she rested her free hand on the back of Jeff's neck. Dixie slowly opened her eyes when Jeff pulled back from her, she looked at him and smiled. 'When do you want to try making love again princess?' Dixie heard the huskiness and desire in Jeff's voice and it excited her.

'Maybe tomorrow evening after the kids are all in bed.'

'Okay, we'll try then.' Dixie snuggled back into Jeff, she was looking forward to being with him again, she felt as if it had been too long since they had made love to each other.

Jeff lifted Sam out of his basket when he woke up, he carefully supported his head and rocked him. 'Hey, my little one, did you have a nice sleep?' He looked down at his son and kissed him on the head. 'Little Bug, you're so cute.' Jeff saw Dixie watching them and he smiled at her.

'I think he looks more and more like you every day Dixie.'

'He still has your eyes, I am glad he kept the colour of them.' Jeff hummed a little tune as he held Sam, he liked doing all of this stuff for him, being a dad was the best feeling in the world.

'Dix,' Jeff said and looked at her.

'What is it?'

'Look, he's smiling.' Jeff felt Dixie move and look at Sam.

'You're right, he's such a clever little boy. I'm going to write it in his book.' Jeff kept hold of Sam as Dixie wrote down the date of his first smile in the book.

Dixie looked up when she heard the door open, Sophia and John were back from school. She watched as they ran in and then Sophia immediately went over to her dad and Sam. 'Hello little brother, I missed you.' She gently put her arms around Jeff and Sam, Dixie smiled, the scene made her feel so warm and happy. John came over to her.

'Hello Dixie.'

'Hello John.' He immediately gave her a hug and she hugged him back. John had only recently found the confidence to hug her without being asked if he would like to, it had been a pleasant surprise and she loved it. John went over to Jeff and Sophia and he hugged his dad as Sophia was holding Sam. Dixie's mind drifted over a few of the struggles they had faced to get here; the operation, taking in the kids and moving to a bigger house, all of them had been worth it.


	48. Chapter Forty-Eight

**Author: Raven Shadowrose**

**Rating: M**

**Pairing: ?/?**

**Summary: Sequel to Epiphany, Jeff and Dixie are trying to have a baby, what happens when it is likely to be more difficult than they first thought?**

**Disclaimer: I do not know or own any of the characters from Casualty, any original characters and the story are my property and I do not give permission for either of them to be used.**

**A/N: This is a direct sequel to Epiphany, please read that first to understand this story :) Reviews are welcome :)**

**Thank you to BeethovenRIP, olivia. c. king1 and chan. nelson4444 for your reviews and support, it is time for a bit of Jeff and Dixie love :) **

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**Chapter Forty-Eight.**

Jeff had hurried home after his shift, he had spent the evening with the kids and Dixie while they had tea and the kids did their homework, he loved them all so much and spending time with them made him happy. He remembered feeling so content as he put Sophia to bed, it had become a nightly ritual that he would go into her room and hug her, he would kiss her on the head and sit with her until she fell asleep. Then he would go in and say goodnight to John too, sometimes John wanted to talk for a little while and sometimes he didn't, Jeff was quite happy to do whatever his son needed him to do. Dixie would always say goodnight to them too, he was pleased that Sophia and John loved her as much as he did. After that they would put Sam to bed as well, he usually went right to sleep after he had been fed and he would sleep for several hours until he needed feeding again. Jeff was happy that they were getting into a routine with Sam, he was sleeping better now and Dixie was getting more rest each night. He was still taking some of the feeding but mainly during the day as Dixie didn't want him to be tired at work. It made him feel good that Dixie cared about him and loved him the way that she did.

Dixie sat on the bed in her bathrobe, she was a bit nervous about tonight and making love to Jeff, it had been a while since she had been with him and they had made love to each other. She wanted to be with him and have him make love to her again but it made her feel a bit on the apprehensive side too. Her body had changed quite a bit since she'd had Sam and she wondered what Jeff would think of her now. She looked up when Jeff came into their bedroom and he stood in front of her. 'Come on princess, the bath is ready for us.'

'Okay.' Dixie put her hand in Jeff's and she let him lead her into the bathroom, once they were inside he shut the door and went over to her, taking her into his arms. 'Jeff, do you have the monitor?'

'Of course I do love, it is just over there and it is turned right up.'

'Okay, that's good.'

'Relax princess, if Sam cries then we will be able to hear him and we will go to him.'

'I know we will.' Dixie watched Jeff take his clothes off and he got into the bath.

'Come on princess, the water is warm and it feels nice.' Dixie slowly slipped off her robe and got into the water with Jeff, she snuggled up to him and his arms immediately wrapped themselves around her, the feeling of safety and comfort returned to Dixie and she closed her eyes.

Jeff rested his head against Dixie's and he gently stroked the bare skin of her arms and back as he held her close to him. He heard Dixie sigh quietly and he kissed her head. Jeff put his fingers under Dixie's chin and he kissed her softly on her lips, he licked at them and slipped his tongue inside her mouth when she opened her lips beneath his. He kept the pace of the kiss slow and careful, it was important to him that Dixie felt comfortable with everything that they did. Jeff slowed the kiss down and then pressed a kiss against Dixie's forehead. 'I love you Mrs Collier.'

'Love you too Mr Collier.' Jeff rested his back against the edge of the bath and he moved Dixie so she was lying with her back against his chest. He put his arms around her and pressed a kiss against the bare skin of her shoulder. 'Dixie,' he whispered.

'Yeah.'

'I love you, I just hope that you know how just how much. I know that sometimes I tend to say everything wrong, I've never been one for poetry and fancy words but I need to say this. You and the kids are my world princess, I don't think I've ever been happier than I am right now. I can't wait to come home to you all at the end of the day. All of my thoughts are of you, I make it through each day because I know that I have all of you to come home to.' Jeff kissed Dixie's shoulder again and he felt her snuggle back against him.

'That's beautiful Jeffrey, for someone that thinks he says everything wrong you got that just right. I love you, always.' Jeff was pleased that Dixie had loved what he said to her, he meant every word and he just wanted her to know that she was special and how much she meant to him.

Dixie smiled, Jeff's words made her feel special and loved, she felt his fingers running up and down her arms in random patterns and she sighed quietly. 'Dix, we should get out, the water is getting a bit cold and I don't want you catching a chill.'

'Okay, it is cooling down a bit now.' She carefully stood up and then climbed out of the bath, she picked up her bathrobe and wrapped it around her body. Jeff pulled the plug out of the bath and let the water go and then he put his own robe on. 'Come on princess, let's go into our room.' Dixie picked up the baby monitor and took it with her as Jeff led her into their bedroom, she put the monitor close to the bed and then sat down. Jeff sat next to her and he took her hands in his again. 'Dixie, I'm not going to rush you, if you're not ready for us to make love then we can wait. I don't want to hurt you.'

'You won't hurt me. I trust you Jeff.'

'I'm going to take it slow, if you want to stop then you can just tell me.'

'Okay. Can I have a hug?'

'Of course you can princess.' Dixie snuggled herself into Jeff's arms and sighed in happiness as he held her against his body.

Jeff lay back on the bed and pulled Dixie with him, he held her close and looked into the eyes that he loved so much. He leaned in and pressed his lips against Dixie's, her mouth opened immediately and he slipped his tongue inside her mouth. Jeff lost himself in the kiss that he was sharing with Dixie, he tangled his fingers in her hair and ran his other hand up and down her body. He had missed being with Dixie while she was pregnant and then after the birth. Jeff felt Dixie's hand move inside his robe and touch the bare skin of his chest, he pulled her closer and tugged at the tie holding her bathrobe closed until it opened and revealed some of her naked body to him. Jeff helped Dixie out of the robe and he took his own off too, he looked down at Dixie and smiled at her. 'You're so beautiful my Dixie.'

'Do you really think so?'

'I do, very much, you're gorgeous.'

'Even though I have stretch marks on my belly and need to lose some of the weight I've gained from carrying Sam?'

'I don't see those things Dixie, all I see is you, my beautiful wife.' Jeff saw the smile on Dixie's face and he kissed her, he wanted her to know how beautiful she was to him.

Dixie interlocked her fingers with Jeff's as he kissed her, she wanted him and needed him. Their kissing was growing more passionate by the second and she felt Jeff's lips move away from hers and down to her neck. 'Jeff,' she gasped as his lips caressed the sensitive skin of her throat and his hand settled on her breast, his fingers gently stroking her nipple. 'My Jeffrey.' Dixie moaned as Jeff's gently kissed his way down her chest, he was being gentle as she was still feeding Sam and sometimes she still felt a bit uncomfortable. She looked into Jeff's eyes as his fingers moved their way up her inner thigh and settled at the top. 'Dixie, let me know if I hurt you, if you're uncomfortable then I will stop.'

'Okay, I will.' Dixie felt Jeff gently part her legs and then he slipped a finger inside of her and held it still.

'Are you okay princess?'

'Yeah, I'm okay.' Dixie moaned as Jeff slowly moved his finger inside her, he gently added another one and moved them both in her. 'I've missed this Jeff,' Dixie moaned quietly and she closed her eyes, she wanted to feel everything that was happening to her.

Jeff watched Dixie carefully to see if she was in pain, he wanted her to enjoy herself and he was going to make sure that she did so and wasn't hurting at all. He slowly moved his fingers inside her body and moved them a bit faster when he was certain that he wouldn't hurt her by doing so. Jeff groaned when he felt Dixie's hand stroke his rapidly growing erection, her moans always turned him on and right now it was very hard to ignore. 'Don't stop Dixie, please don't stop.' He was aware that he had begged her not to stop and he stilled his fingers inside Dixie's body to avoid hurting her while she touched him and coaxed him to full hardness. Jeff felt Dixie's hand slow and then stop, it moved up his body and her fingers lazily circled his nipple. 'Jeff,' he heard Dixie say quietly. 'I want you inside me.'

'Are you sure princess?'

'Yeah, I've never been more sure of anything.'

'Okay, tell me if I hurt you or you're uncomfortable.'

'I will, I promise.' Jeff slipped the condom on, they were going to have to use them while Dixie was breastfeeding Sam and couldn't go on the pill. He didn't want Dixie getting pregnant right away, he wanted her to recover from this pregnancy fully before they even thought about having another baby. Jeff parted Dixie's legs again and he slowly started to push his length into her body. He watched Dixie's face for any sign that she was hurting or uncomfortable.

Dixie felt Jeff stop moving when his full length was buried inside her body. 'You okay Dixie?' She nodded and Jeff rested his head against her chest, she gently stroked his head as they just lay together with their naked skin touching. It wasn't often that Jeff let Dixie hold him like this, he liked to be the one holding her and protecting her with his arms. Dixie made the most of being able to hold Jeff in her arms and cuddle him close to her. 'Make love to me Jeff,' she whispered and he nodded.

'Okay princess.' Dixie looked up into Jeff's eyes as he slowly started to move inside of her, she didn't feel any pain and she lifted her hips to meet Jeff's movements. Dixie saw the love that Jeff held for her in his eyes, she moaned into Jeff's mouth as he kissed her and she felt his finger brushing against her clit. 'Love you princess.'

'Love you too Jeff.' Dixie felt Jeff kissing her neck and she moaned again as he made love to her.

Jeff moved inside Dixie, he was being careful to make sure that he wasn't hurting her. He gently kissed Dixie's neck and ran his fingers over her nipples, he smiled when she moaned and he pressed a kiss to her forehead. 'Look at me princess.' Jeff locked his eyes onto Dixie's as he moved inside her body, it was intense and satisfying. He moaned and buried his head in Dixie's neck as he made love to her. Jeff stroked Dixie's clit and he heard her moan. 'Come for me princess.' He carried on stroking her clit and moving inside her, he felt her body squeeze him and Dixie moaned as she came around his length. Jeff timed his movements with Dixie's to make her orgasm last longer.

Dixie looked into Jeff's eyes as he continued to move inside of her, she stroked her fingers over his spine and she kissed him as his movements became uncontrolled. She felt Jeff arch his back and he groaned as came, he slowly lowered his head to her chest and Dixie put her arms around him. She stroked her hand over Jeff's back and up to his head. Dixie just held Jeff until he slowly moved out of her and removed the condom, he got rid of it and then climbed back into bed. Dixie snuggled herself into Jeff's arms and she felt him stroking her hair. 'Dix?'

'Yeah love.'

'Are you okay?'

'I'm fine.'

'I didn't hurt you, did I?'

'No love, you didn't.'

'Good.' She felt Jeff pull the covers around them and tuck them up around her shoulders. 'Are you warm enough princess?'

'Of course I am, you're holding me.' Dixie snuggled closer to Jeff and took comfort from his closeness and warmth.

Jeff held Dixie in his arms, he was pleased that he hadn't hurt her while they made love. He gently stroked her hair and kissed her head as he watched her fall asleep in his arms. Jeff checked the covers again and tucked them around Dixie to make sure that she was warm enough and would be comfortable throughout the night. Jeff loved to watch Dixie sleep, it made him happy. 'Night princess,' he whispered and tightened his arms around her. Jeff closed his eyes and rested his head back against the pillow, it wasn't long before he drifted into a peaceful sleep.


	49. Chapter Forty-Nine

**Author: Raven Shadowrose**

**Rating: M**

**Pairing: ?/?**

**Summary: Sequel to Epiphany, Jeff and Dixie are trying to have a baby, what happens when it is likely to be more difficult than they first thought?**

**Disclaimer: I do not know or own any of the characters from Casualty, any original characters and the story are my property and I do not give permission for either of them to be used.**

**A/N: This is a direct sequel to Epiphany, please read that first to understand this story :) Reviews are welcome :)**

**Thank you to BeethovenRIP and chan. nelson4444 for your reviews and support, more squish :) **

* * *

**Chapter Forty-Nine.**

Dixie sat on a bench in the graveyard, Jeff was at work and the kids were at school so it was the perfect time for her to do what she needed to. She wanted to introduce Sam to her dad but she was finding it hard to go over to his grave; she always found it difficult as she remembered everything that had happened in the last days of his life and how much she had let him down. Dixie took a deep breath and then stood up, it was now or never, she had to do this. She was holding Sam in her arms and she slowly walked over to the grave that held her father. 'Hi dad, I know it has been a long time since I've visited you and that I should come here more often.' Dixie sighed and just looked at the gravestone that she had bought for him, she was finding it hard to find the words she needed. 'I wish I knew what to say, I've never really been very good at speaking from my heart. This is Sam, he's your grandson.' Dixie sighed, she felt a bit silly talking to a stone. 'I wish you were still with us so you could see him and hold him. We named him after you; Samuel Matthew Arthur Collier, that's right, Jeff is Sam's father, I bet you didn't expect that.' Dixie looked down at Sam and she held him close to her. 'I know what my marriage to Jeff started out like, we were just friends and nothing more, but, something changed, I changed. I don't know how it happened but I ended up falling in love with Jeff. He's my best friend and I love him so much. He gave me the chance to be a mother, he's a special man.' Dixie paused for breath and she gently stroked Sam's face with her finger. 'Sam has his daddy's eyes, I think he's going to keep them for good. I'm glad about that, I want him to keep them.' She smiled down at her son and kissed his head, she hoped that her dad could hear her talking to him. 'I didn't think that I would end up being a mum, I'm happy that I have been given the chance to know what it feels like to have a child.' Dixie gently rocked Sam in her arms and adjusted his blanket so that he would stay warm.

'Dad, Sam smiled for the first time the other day, he is growing so quickly and I love him so much. I think I'm doing a good job at looking after him, he doesn't seem to have any complaints. I'm looking after Jeff's kids, John and Sophia, too. I love them as if they were mine, I know they're not but I don't think that it matters. They are the sweetest kids that I've ever come across, I know that Jeff is so proud of them, I am too.' Dixie smiled, somehow talking to her dad didn't feel so awkward any more. 'In all my life I didn't think that I would end up as happy as I am now, I didn't think that I would end up with a man, least of all Jeff. I know that I've always loved him as a friend, I didn't think that our marriage would end up as more than one of friendship.' Dixie's mind drifted back over all of the time that she had spent with Jeff; the times that they had laughed together and cried together. All of the times she had supported him; through the divorce, his kids moving away to London, losing Polly, the college shootings and all of the other times that were impossible to count. 'We've always been inseparable, except when we argued and we've always been able to do that well. I think we argue because we're so alike.' Dixie laughed as some of the arguments that she'd had with Jeff came into her mind, all of those arguments ended with them making up by the end of the day. 'Jeff has supported me too, through everything that I went through with the Malones, losing you and Polly, even the smaller day to day things, I can't imagine my life without him in it. Life takes people in strange directions, I am just glad that it has brought me here.' Dixie smiled again, she loved Jeff with all of her heart, he was her rock and she hoped that he felt the same about her.

Dixie looked around her, the graveyard was so peaceful and quiet, there were very few people around and she was using the quiet time to collect her thoughts and think about everything that had happened to bring her to this point. 'I had to have an operation so that I could have Sam, I would have done anything to bring him into the world. I am glad that I did it, Sam means everything to me, he is my little boy and I love him.' Dixie took another deep breath, she was feeling a little bit emotional. 'I wish that Sam could have the chance to get to know his grandfather and his grandmother. I promise that he will know of you and mum and I will show him pictures, it's not the same as seeing you for real, but, it is the best that I can do.' Dixie hoped that her best was good enough. 'I'm going to have to go dad, Sophia and John will be home soon and Jeff will be home not long after them, I don't want them to worry about me and they will do if I'm not there. I'll come back with Sam again, maybe I'll bring Jeff and the kids with me too. See you soon dad, I love you, give my love to mum. I miss you both.' Dixie looked at her dad's grave one last time before she left the graveyard and went home.

Jeff sensed Dixie's mood the minute that he walked into the house, she looked pensive and she was quiet, he wondered what had happened during the day to make her feel like that. The kids were sat at the table and having a drink of juice that Dixie had obviously made for them. 'Hey kids.'

'Hi dad,' John said and Jeff smiled at his son.

'What homework have you got?'

'History, maths and English.'

'If you need any help then you can ask me.'

I know I can dad, they're my best subjects, I can do the work easily.' Jeff smiled again, he was happy that John was such a hard worker at school.

'Good, work hard and you can do anything that you want to.'

'I will.' John went back to his homework and Jeff went over to Sophia.

'How is my little princess?'

'I have homework too daddy; art, science and English.'

'Come on then princess, make a start, your tea will be done soon.'

'You should talk to mummy Dixie, she is sad about something.'

'I will, don't you worry princess.' Jeff hugged John and Sophia and he went into the lounge, Dixie had headed in there earlier, he wanted to know what was bothering her and how he could help her feel better.

Jeff sat down next to Dixie, she was holding Sam and he was asleep in her arms, he just watched her gently rock their son as she held him. 'Hey princess,' he said quietly.

'Hi Jeff.' Jeff noted the sadness in Dixie's voice.

'Dix, what's wrong?' Dixie stayed silent and she just kept looking at Sam. 'Dixie, come on princess, what is making my beautiful wife so sad?'

'I went to the graveyard today.'

'Okay, why did you go there?'

'I wanted to show Sam to my dad.'

'What happened?'

'I just sat by his grave and talked to him.'

'What about?'

'About you, Sam, Sophia and John. I told him how much I missed him and mum.'

'Of course you miss them princess, they are your parents, it's okay to miss them.'

'I do miss them, a lot. I would give up anything to see them again, they didn't get the chance to see me become a mum or to hold their grandson.'

'I am sure that he heard everything that you had to say Dixie, I'm also sure that he saw Sam too and that he loves him.' Jeff put his arms around Dixie and Sam, he gently held them close to him.

'What about my mum, do you think she heard me too?'

'Of course she did sweetheart.'

'I hope you're right.' Jeff pressed a gentle kiss to Dixie's head and he just held her, being hugged always made Dixie feel better.

Dixie snuggled up to Jeff, she just wanted to feel close to him now and Jeff's arms around her made her feel loved. 'I know that my mum and dad would have loved to have been grandparents. I wish that they could be here to see Sam and hold him. Sam won't be able to see his grandparents either.'

'He has us Dixie, he also has his brother and sister who love him very much.'

'I know, what about your family Jeff?'

'My mum is dead as you know and my father isn't exactly the loving type.'

'What about your brother and sister?'

'My sister knows about Sam, I've told her all about him. I don't really talk to my brother.'

'Why not?'

'Richard takes after my dad, we don't agree on many things, mainly about Jamie.'

'Your nephew.'

'Yeah, he's a good kid, he's studying to be a nurse.'

'I remember you telling me.'

'Everyone is so proud of him, except his dad, he thinks it is a woman's job.'

'He sounds like a right piece of work.'

'I don't think you'd like him princess.'

'I probably wouldn't.'

'It doesn't matter Dixie, not everyone can have the perfect family life.'

'Maybe you should invite Margaret and Jamie round to see us.'

'I might just do that.' Dixie smiled at Jeff and she kissed him on the cheek, Jeff rarely talked about his family or saw any of them so she thought it would be good for him to see them again. She often worried that Jeff was out on his own without his family, maybe seeing Margaret and Jamie would make him happy.

Jeff rested his head against Dixie's and he closed his eyes, Richard and his dad hadn't approved of him marrying Dixie, it is why they weren't at the wedding. It was also the reason Margaret and Jamie weren't there, he'd just told Dixie that they were busy and couldn't make it. Jeff didn't want Dixie knowing the real reason, he wanted to spare her feelings. He'd always loved Dixie, even when they were just friends and he would do anything to protect her. 'Jeff,' he heard Dixie calling him.

'Yeah?'

'You should call Margaret now, invite her round to see us, tell her to bring Jamie too.'

'Maybe I will.'

'Go on love, do it now.'

'Maybe you're right.' Jeff took his phone out of his pocket and dialled Margaret's number, he listened to the ringing until she picked up. 'Margaret, it's Jeff.'

'Hello, what can I do for you?'

'I thought you might like to come around and see Sam.'

'How is the little one?'

'He's doing well, growing bigger by the hour.'

'Good. I'd love to come and see him, when are you free?'

'Friday, if that's okay with you.'

'It will be later on, about five.'

'Yeah, that's good. Bring Jamie with you.'

'I will do, just the other day he was talking about you.'

'He was?'

'He looks up to you Jeff, you know he does.'

'I'll see you Friday, Sophia and John will be here too.'

'I bet they're so grown up.'

'They are.'

'I'll see you all on Friday.'

'Thanks Margaret.'

'You're welcome, bye Jeff.'

'Bye Margaret.' Jeff put the phone down, he realised he was quite looking forward to seeing Margaret and Jamie.

Dixie had been quietly listening in to Jeff talking to Margaret and she went over to Jeff, she put her arms around him and rested her head on his shoulder. 'See, wasn't so hard, was it love?'

'No, you're right, I guess it wasn't.'

'It will do you good to see some of your family Jeff.'

'Yeah, it will.'

'Come on, let's go and see to the kids, they'll be getting hungry and we both know how they look forward to take away night.'

'I'd forgotten about that, do you think they'll want pizza again?'

'I think so.' Dixie chuckled, it had become quite the ritual for them to have pizza on take away night. She stood up and followed Jeff into the kitchen, Sophia and John were quietly doing their homework at the table and they looked up when the door opened. 'Hey kids,' Dixie said. 'I was thinking we might order pizza.'

'Yeah mummy Dixie, pizza, it is take away night after all.' Dixie smiled at the kids and she picked up the phone, she was looking forward to sitting down with Jeff and the kids and enjoying spending the evening with them all.

Jeff sat in the lounge held Sam in his arms and talked to him as Dixie prepared plates for the pizza in the kitchen with Sophia and John's help. 'Your auntie Margaret and cousin Jamie are coming to visit soon. I just know that they're going to love you.' The more Jeff thought about seeing Margaret and Jamie, the more he realised that he was looking forward to it and couldn't wait to see them. He had been away from his family for so long and he realised that he was missing them. 'I can't wait for them to meet you Little Bug. You're not so little now, I still think that I'm going to call you Little Bug though, I like it and I know that mummy does too.' Jeff listened to Dixie talking with Sophia and John in the kitchen, it felt good to know that he had his own little family now and nobody would take them away from him.


	50. Chapter Fifty

**Author: Raven Shadowrose**

**Rating: M**

**Pairing: ?/?**

**Summary: Sequel to Epiphany, Jeff and Dixie are trying to have a baby, what happens when it is likely to be more difficult than they first thought?**

**Disclaimer: I do not know or own any of the characters from Casualty, any original characters and the story are my property and I do not give permission for either of them to be used.**

**A/N: This is a direct sequel to Epiphany, please read that first to understand this story :) Reviews are welcome :)**

**Thank you to BeethovenRIP, olivia. c. king1 and chan. nelson4444 for your reviews and support throughout the story. Thank to everyone that has read, favourited, followed and reviewed this story. I hope you all enjoy this last chapter. **

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**Chapter Fifty.**

Jeff was holding Sam in his arms and rocking him as he walked around the lounge, Sam was fussing a little bit and Jeff had found that walking around with him in his arms calmed Sam down. He had found that out quite by accident one day and he had been using it ever since. Sam had just been for his injections and Jeff had every reason to believe that it was the reason why he was fussing. 'It's all right Little Bug, it's over now.' It had been hard for Jeff to watch his little boy crying over being given his injections but it had been even harder for Dixie. Jeff looked up as Dixie came into the lounge. 'Hey princess.'

'Is Sam all right?'

'He's fine, just a little bit fussy.'

'I thought he wasn't going to stop crying when they put the needle in him, I felt so bad about putting him through that.'

'It is for his own good though Dixie.'

'I know, I just wish that they could do it painlessly.'

'Of course you do princess. Why don't you hold him for a while?'

'Yeah.' Jeff handed Sam to Dixie and he smiled at her. 'He seems a bit sleepy.'

'They said he might be, he'll be all right. I'm going to go and see the kids, make sure they're ready to see their Auntie Margaret and Cousin Jamie, I'll be back soon.'

'All right.' Jeff went upstairs, he wanted everything to be perfect it had been a long time since he had seen his sister and nephew.

Dixie looked down at her son, she'd hated putting him through the injections even though they were for his own good. Sam had cried even though she had been holding him and it hurt to think of him being in pain. 'I'm sorry my little man, mummy just wants the best for you though. You're my brave little boy.' Sam seemed more settled than he had before, it looked as if he was already getting over the shock of the injections. Dixie rested her hand against Sam's forehead and she checked his temperature just in case he was getting a bit of a fever from the active virus in the injection. 'My Little Bug, I love you.' Dixie gently kissed Sam's head to avoid waking him and she put him in his basket, she knew that he still had some more injections to come and that he would probably cry again. She sat down and watched Sam as he slept, with any luck he would be more like his usual self later on.

Jeff knocked on Sophia's door and waited until she said that he could come in, Dixie had made him promise that he would knock before entering Sophia's space. She was growing up and Dixie insisted that it was important for young girls to have their own private space and to be alone when they needed it. Jeff sat down on Sophia's bed, he was trying to make time for both her and John so they didn't feel left out. 'Sophia, are you looking forward to seeing your Auntie and Cousin?'

'I am, Auntie Margaret used to bring me chocolate.'

'So you remember her then?'

'Yeah, she's nice. I don't remember what she looks like though.'

'You were quite a bit younger when you last saw her.'

'Is she coming to see Sam?'

'She's coming to see you too.'

'Daddy?'

'Yeah, my little princess.'

'Can I have a hug?'

'Of course you can.' Jeff smiled when Sophia sat on his knee and cuddled up to him, she hadn't done that in a long time. 'When did my little girl get to be so big and grown up?' Jeff stroked Sophia's hair and kissed her head. 'Come on my little princess, your Auntie and Cousin will be here soon, will you go down to Dixie and wait for me?'

'Okay daddy,' Sophia said and jumped up, Jeff heard her running down the stairs to sit with Dixie.

Once Sophia had gone down to Dixie he went into John's room and found John waiting for him. 'Dad, is it nearly time for Auntie Margaret and Jamie to get here?'

'Yeah mate, it is.'

'Can I play football with Jamie in the garden?'

'Of course you can.'

'Thanks dad.' Jeff smiled as John picked up his football and held it in his hands.

'You and Jamie always got on well, I remember him teaching you to balance the ball on your head. You practised for hours to get it right.'

'I can still do it.' John picked up the ball and balanced it on his head.

'So you can.' Jeff put his arm around John's shoulders and guided him out of the room to where Sophia and Dixie were waiting for them.

Dixie heard the knock at the door as Jeff and John came through into the lounge together, she was reminded at how alike they were when they were together. Sophia jumped up and ran to let Margaret and Jamie in. Dixie wondered what Jeff's sister and nephew would be like, would they like her? From what she had heard, Dixie thought that Margaret sounded a lot like Jeff and Jamie sounded nice. Dixie looked up when Sophia brought a woman and a young man in with her, the woman had Jeff's eyes and Dixie wondered if that particular colour ran in the family. Jeff stood up and hugged Margaret and then Jamie. 'Margaret, Jamie, I'd like you to meet my wife, Dixie Collier.'

'Hello,' Dixie said and smiled at both of the people that stood in their lounge.

'Hello Dixie,' Margaret said and Dixie was surprised to hear that she was a lot quieter than Jeff. Dixie shook hands with both Jamie and Margaret and then she went to put the kettle on for tea.

Whilst Dixie was putting the kettle on for tea Jeff picked Sam up and handed him to Margaret. 'Jeff, he's adorable, he reminds me of Sophia and John when they were little. I can't believe how much they've grown up.'

'I know, I was thinking that earlier.'

'They look happy.' Jeff looked out of the window at Sophia and John who were playing with Jamie outside.

'I think they are, they seem to be.'

'You know that you're a good dad Jeff, the kids love you.'

'Yeah, I have to be, me and Dixie are all they've got right now.'

'How is Lucy getting on?'

'All right, I think, the kids have talked to her but she doesn't want to speak to me.'

'Don't worry about it, if she wants to come around then she will do in her own time. How are Sophia and John coping with a new baby in the house?'

'They're doing all right, I've been spending time with them and Sam.'

'I remember when you were born Jeff, I asked mum if she could send you back.'

'Charming,' Jeff said with a smile. 'How is Richard?'

'I don't know, I haven't spoken to our brother in quite some time.'

'Oh, I haven't either.'

'He isn't exactly the nicest person in the world, especially when it comes to Jamie.'

'What do you mean?'

'Jamie will have to tell you that himself.' Jeff wondered what Margaret meant, but, he didn't push it, when Margaret had made her mind up not to tell you something then she stuck to it.

Dixie took the tea into Margaret and Jeff, she had left Jamie with the kids in the kitchen, they were eating cake and drinking juice. She put the cups down on the table and then sat next to Jeff. Dixie sipped at her own tea. 'Jeff tells me that you're a paramedic like him Dixie.'

'I am, I'm also his boss.'

'I bet he loves that, our Jeffrey isn't one for taking orders.'

'Tell me about it,' Dixie said and laughed.

'Are you two going to gang up on me?'

'What did you think would happen dear brother?' Dixie chuckled and kissed Jeff on the cheek.

'He knows who wears the trousers in this house and at work.' Dixie laughed again and Jeff glared at her.

'Typical women.'

'I can tell your wife plenty of stories Jeffrey Collier,' Margaret said with a smile.

'Oh please do.' Dixie rubbed her hands together and she smiled at Jeff who was still playfully glaring at her.

Jeff was relieved when the kids and Jamie came in and joined them all, it meant that he was safe from Margaret telling Dixie tales about his younger days, for now anyway. Jamie and John were still chattering away about football and he heard Jamie promise to take John to a match when he wasn't so busy with college and doing his training. Sophia had gone over to Margaret and was sat on her knee and they were talking about school and the subjects that she liked doing the best. Jeff just watched them all talking and he felt Dixie squeeze his hand, he looked over and smiled at Dixie who smiled back at him, he really was happy that inviting Margaret and Jamie over had gone so well. He wondered what it was that Richard didn't approve of about Jamie being a nurse, surely he should be happy that his son had chosen a career that was all about helping other people. Jeff was confused, he felt like he was missing something about the whole situation.

Once the tea had been finished, Jeff took the cups into the kitchen and put them in the sink, he heard the door open and turned to see Jamie stood there. 'Uncle Jeff.'

'All right Jamie, how is your dad?'

'His usual self, I guess.'

'I take that isn't a good thing?'

'No, it isn't, he doesn't approve of me being a nurse.'

'You know that I'm proud of you, right?'

'Yeah, so is Auntie Margaret and my mum.'

'Good, just remember that.'

'I will. I like Dixie, we had a nice chat earlier, wouldn't want to get on the wrong side of her though.'

'That is something for you to remember as well, Dixie is no pushover.'

'I can see that. There is a chance I might be starting at Holby soon, I'm waiting for my placement to come through.'

'Oh, I didn't know that. Another Collier, I'd better warn all of the nurses to look out.' Jeff saw Jamie smile half-heartedly and Jeff just looked at him. 'Is there something that I don't know?'

'Sort of, Dixie told me that you would be all right with it so I'm just going to say it. Uncle Jeff, I'm gay.'

'Is that what Margaret said I would have to ask you about?'

'Yeah, she knows about me. My dad doesn't know though, I know that he would hate me for it.'

'It doesn't change anything, you're still my nephew and I'm still proud of you.'

'Thanks Uncle Jeff.' Jeff hugged Jamie, he was very proud of his nephew and everything that he had achieved so far.

Dixie laughed to herself as Margaret told her some of the stories of what Jeff had got up to in his youth. 'When he came back with that tattoo our father gave Jeff the biggest smack round the head that I've ever seen. I remember Jeff thinking that he was so cool because he'd had it done, he gave me his pocket money as a bribe so that I wouldn't tell dad.'

'That sounds like Jeff.'

'He's always been cheeky and very forward, I don't think that there is any woman that can resist those blue eyes of his.'

'Sam has those eyes too.'

'I noticed that, he'll probably take after his dad.'

'I'd better warn the world,' Dixie said and chuckled. 'Jeff is a good man, I do hope that Sam will take after his dad just like John has.' Margaret nodded her agreement.

'As much as I like to tease my brother it is nice to see him happy and settled. I can tell that you love him Dixie.'

'I do, very much.' Dixie and Margaret looked up when Jeff and Jamie came back in from putting Sophia, John and Sam to bed.

'What have you ladies been talking about?'

'Stuff.'

'That's what worries me.' Dixie laughed and she kissed Jeff on the cheek, she would keep him in suspense for a little while longer yet.

Jeff and Dixie both hugged Margaret and Jamie at the door. 'Don't be a stranger Margaret, it will be nice to see you from time to time.'

'You too little brother. Keep me informed on everything the kids do, I want lots of pictures.'

'You got it.' Jeff let go of Margaret and he turned to Jamie. 'Let me know when you get your placement.'

'Don't you mean if?'

'No, I don't, you'll get it.' He saw Jamie smile and Jeff hugged him again. 'Remember, we're all proud of you.'

'I know, thanks Uncle Jeff.' Jeff and Dixie both waved at Margaret and Jamie as they drove away and then Jeff closed the door behind them.

Dixie turned to Jeff once they had shut the door, she took his hand in hers and led him upstairs. She quietly went into their bedroom and closed the door behind them. 'Did the kids get to sleep all right?'

'Yeah, they did.'

'Good.' Dixie checked the monitor to make sure that she would hear Sam if he needed them during the night.

'Dixie.'

'Yeah love.'

'You make me happy, I just want you to know that.'

'You make me happy too Jeff.'

'Thanks for saying to Jamie that I would understand about him being gay.'

'He told you?' Jeff nodded and smiled.

'He did.'

'He's a nice boy, I hope he gets his placement.'

'Of course he will, he's a Collier.' Dixie smiled as she got changed for bed, it had been nice meeting Margaret and Jamie and she was looking forward to seeing them again. Dixie thought about everything that she had faced with Jeff and she smiled, she had the family that she'd always wanted and she owed it to the man that she loved more than anything.

Jeff felt Dixie snuggle up to him when they got into bed. 'Jeff, thank you.'

'What for?'

'For giving me everything that I've ever wanted.'

'How do you mean?'

'You've given me love and you make me feel cared for. You've also given me the chance to be a mum and to know what it feels like to have my own child. I love you.'

'Love you too princess.' Jeff just held Dixie close to him and stroked her hair. 'I feel the same you know, having you love me makes me feel like the luckiest man in the world.'

'Awww Jeff, are you going all sentimental on me?'

'Maybe a little bit. Is that a bad thing?'

'No, not at all.'

'I think I know how we should celebrate our happiness.'

'What way would that be?'

'How about we start practising for the new kid?' Jeff heard Dixie chuckle in the darkness and he laughed with her. Jeff's mind drifted over the long journey and the trials that he had faced with Dixie to get to where they were now and he came to the conclusion that it had all been worth it. Jeff and Dixie had been blessed with Sam and Sophia and John, the beautiful children that made their lives complete, they are family and they always will be.


End file.
